Idiocracy

“Let’s go through the pros and cons of smoking marijuana. The pros: food tastes tastier, music sounds better and nature is more impressive. “Cons: It kills your sperm, girls don’t dig it, the scene isn’t as cool as people think it is. If you’re an athlete, it affects your conditioning. It stays in your system and it kills your brain. …

Vice News reports: On the QAnon message board the Great Awakening, members concluded that the sudden nature of Kirstie Alley’s death was a clear sign that her death was part of a global plot to silence critics of the COVID vaccines. “I wholly believe the [deep state] has a way of dosing people with poisons that create aggressive cancers,” one …

“These woke high-IQ stupid people are easy to recognize. They hate George Washington, they hate Thomas Jefferson, they hate Dr. Seuss, and they hate Mr. Potato Head. “These woke high-IQ stupid people, they walk around with Ziploc bags of kale that they can eat to give them energy. If you want to eat kale, that’s up to you. I don’t …

Mediaite reports: Anti-Semitism-spouting entertainer/entrepreneur Kanye West surfaced on social media Sunday night to post a bizarre rant about Elon Musk and former President Barack Obama. How we got here: On Thursday, West appeared to reach rock bottom in his descent into anti-Semitism when he performed essentially an extended infomercial for Hitler on Alex Jones’s show. On Sunday, West popped his virtual head up …

Raw Story reports: Failed California gubernatorial candidate and current Fox News contributor Caitlyn Jenner said on Friday that she didn’t blame anyone for being offended by Kanye West’s overt praise of Adolf Hitler, but she nonetheless wished him well. “I’ve known, obviously, Kanye for a very long time, he’s always been very, very good to me,” she began. “And I …

Mediaite reports: Kanye West has once again been suspended from Twitter for violating the social media platform’s rule against the incitement of violence. West posted an image of the swastika photoshopped inside of the Star of David on Twitter Thursday night, hours after he professed his admiration for the Third Reich and its leader during a bizarre appearance with Alex …

Salon reports: Kanye West praised Nazi dictator Adolf Hitler during an appearance on Alex Jones’ InfoWars conspiracy broadcast. The rapper, who now goes by Ye, appeared on the right-wing conspiracy broadcast alongside white nationalist Nick Fuentes, a week after the pair met with former president Donald Trump at his Mar-a-Lago resort. “That’s right, you’re not Hitler, you’re not a Nazi, …

“Our young men are taught that weakness is strength, that delicacy is desirable, and that being a soft metrosexual is more valuable than training the mind, body, and soul. “Social media has weakened us, siphoning our men of their will to fight. To rise in a noble manner, square their jaws, and charge once more into the breach of light …

The Washington Post reports: Complete with what appear to be flames that shoot from the rocket, the statue was commissioned by the cryptocurrency company Elon GOAT Token. The company was delivering it to Tesla’s Gigafactory in Austin on Saturday, during what it dubbed “Goatsgiving.” Costing a total of $600,000, according to Elon GOAT Token, the Musk sculpture is a nod …

The Huffington Post reports: The Republican Party posted a quote on Twitter Friday about freedom, of all things, that was falsely attributed to George Washington. It was quickly shot down by a CNN reporter. The GOP tweeted on Friday: “Let freedom be free.” It added a quote allegedly from Washington saying: “It will be found an unjust and unwise jealousy …

The Daily Beast reports: With his Georgia Senate race hanging in the balance, Republican candidate Herschel Walker had an unfortunate slip of the tongue as he tried to drum up support for his campaign Tuesday night. Flanked by Sens. Ted Cruz (R-TX) and Lindsey Graham (R-SC), Walker spoke on Fox News about the significance of his election. “This election is …

The Insider reports: “You will make sure no one dies?” Nevada State Athletic Commission chief Stephen Cloobeck asked UFC chief business officer Hunter Campbell at a regulatory meeting Insider attended Wednesday in Las Vegas. “That is priority one, two, three,” Campbell said, counting all the way to ten. “That goes without saying. One of the reasons we tested this was …

The Texas Tribune reports: A Texas federal judge declared it was unconstitutional to disarm someone who is under a protective order, setting into motion a likely legal fight over who can possess firearms — a move that advocates say could have wide-ranging impacts on gun access across the county. U.S. District Judge David Counts, who was appointed by former President …

Marijuana Moment reports: Congressional lawmakers held a hearing on Tuesday to discuss federal marijuana legalization and state cannabis developments, hearing testimony from a panel of broadly pro-reform advocates. Rep. Pete Sessions (R-TX), who as a former chairman of the House Rules Committee regularly blocked cannabis amendments from advancing to the floor for votes, delivered a series of prohibitionist talking points …

“If we was ready for the green agenda, I’d raise my hand right now. But we’re not ready right now. So don’t let them fool you like this is a new agenda. This is not a new agenda. “We’re not prepared. We’re not ready right now. What we need to do is keep having those gas-guzzling cars, ’cause we got …

NPR reports: Go into almost any park and there’s often reminders to refrain from going near, petting or feeding wildlife. Not licking strange animals was simply a given — until now. The National Park Service has added tongue-contact with the Sonoran desert toad among its various warnings for park visitors. “As we say with most things you come across in …

USA Today reports: This year marks the 25th anniversary of Starbucks holiday cups, introduced in 1997. The company will unveil four new cups to kick off the holiday season. “We have always talked about the cups as little gifts, and we hope they feel like a festive present to our customers and store partners,” said Starbucks creative director Gary Jacobson …

The Daily Caller approves: Critics of President Joe Biden staged a protest Tuesday above a major road to Washington, D.C. during morning rush hour which included a large animated penis and signs urging Democrats to “suck my dick.” Shaun Porter, a YouTube performer, placed several signs on a bridge over the 270 spur in Maryland that read “FUCK BIDEN,” “EAT …

NBC News reports: Two fishermen whose alleged cheating at an Ohio fishing tournament went viral pleaded not guilty Wednesday to charges of attempted grand theft and other crimes. Jacob Runyan, 42, and Chase Cominsky, 35, said nothing during a brief arraignment at Cuyahoga County Court of Common Pleas. Their bond was set at $2,500 each. Runyan and Cominsky were indicted …

The Tampa Bay Times reports: Pinellas lawyer Ron Smith was a member of ABATE — A Brotherhood Against Totalitarian Enactments and American Bikers Aimed Toward Education — which lobbied against the law for years. He represented clients who ran afoul of Florida’s motorcycle requirements in court cases that some say helped overturn Florida’s helmet law. Smith and his girlfriend, Brenda …