Idiocracy

The Leighton Times-News reports: Plans for the installation of a unisex bathroom in Palmerton Area School District’s weight room and wrestling room have one school board member questioning its intent. Earl Paules, board vice president, recently paid for a sign located along Delaware Avenue. The handicapped accessible, unisex bathroom was added to the plans late, Paules said. “Everyone thought this …

The Florida Phoenix reports: Gov. Ron DeSantis on Tuesday hosted another roundtable discussion that resembled a television show, lamenting over people who were allegedly victims of defamation by major media platforms. DeSantis, who is a lawyer, welcomed several guests including Nicholas Sandmann, a former high school student from Kentucky who went viral years ago after a confrontation with a Native …

Florida Politics reports: Agriculture Commissioner Wilton Simpson, an egg man himself, testified before the Senate Agriculture Committee this week about the department’s land conservation plans. During the question period, Sen. Lori Berman inquired as to the eggs. “I hope that you will look into what we can do to help the price of eggs for consumers in the state of …

The Daily Caller reports: Then-first lady Melania Trump sat in one of the Situation Room’s most important chairs during the killing of ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and offered former President Donald Trump advice after the attack, former acting Defense Secretary Christopher Miller reveals in his new book. Melania Trump’s presence in the Situation Room was “unexpected,” and she entered …

PolitiZoom reports: We began our week with Donald Trump holding forth on history, specifically the invention of transgenderism a few years ago and the state of the Mexican border in 1023. We end our week with Donald Trump, Jr. giving scientific and military advice. It won’t surprise you that the apple has not fallen far from the tree and Junior’s …

“David Azerrad was born and raised in Montreal, but like a lot of ambitious and freedom-loving people, he fled later to the United States. And because all the people who care about their own rights have left, Canada under Justin Trudeau has become effectively a dictatorship. And we don’t like dictatorships, we’re American. We liberate dictatorships. That’s what we do. …

The Hill reports: A group of leading Senate Republicans is requesting information from cable provider DirecTV surrounding its recent decision to drop conservative network Newsmax from its channel lineup. In a letter dated Feb. 1 and shared exclusively with The Hill, GOP Sens. Ted Cruz (Texas), Lindsey Graham (S.C.), Mike Lee (Utah) and Tom Cotton (Ark.) wrote to the cable …

The Associated Press reports: Gov. Ron DeSantis, who served three terms in the U.S. House, wants a legislative probe on recent decisions by cable carriers to remove One America News Network and Newsmax from their programming lineups. In Bradenton, DeSantis suggested that the House, currently under Republican control, would be the best venue for that urgent inquiry into potential “intellectual …

Mediaite reports: Just in case you needed more proof we live in the dumbest of all possible timelines, M&M’s are dropping their spokescandies after backlash from Fox News and other (mostly conservative) commentators, replacing the anthropomorphic chocolates with Maya Rudolph. Fox News host Tucker Carlson was one of the most vocal critics of the redesigned spokescandies, panning them as “deeply …

“They closed the gyms during COVID. Anybody who closed a gym during a pandemic that kills people who are fat clearly doesn’t care about your health at all. “They hate nicotine. They love THC. They are promoting weed to your children but they’re not letting you use tobacco or even non-tobacco nicotine delivery devices which don’t cause cancer. “Why do …

The Independent reports: Donald Trump has announced that he will preside over the memorial service for Diamond of the political vlogging duo Diamond and Silk. Diamond, whose legal name was Ineitha Lynnette Hardaway, passed away on 8 January at the age of 51. “Please join us on Saturday, January 21, in Fayetteville, North Carolina – she loved that state and …

NBC News reports: Bankrupt crypto firm FTX said on Tuesday that $415 million worth of crypto was hacked from the exchange’s accounts, representing a sizeable portion of the identified assets the company is trying to recover. In a presentation titled “Maximizing FTX Recoveries,” lawyers and advisors for FTX debtors updated the total liquid assets identified for recovery, and said they’re valued at …

Yahoo News reports: January is not even over, but this weekend’s On Patrol: Live aired what may end up being the most shocking TV moment of the year. At the beginning of Saturday’s episode of Reelz’s law enforcement docuseries, police in Beech Grove, Ind. responded to reports of a diaper-clad child roaming the halls with a firearm at a local …

Mediaite reports: Rep. Tim Burchett (R-TN) shared his unfiltered thoughts about UFOs on NewsNation Saturday, including accusing the federal government of a “huge cover up” and telling viewers that there is proof of UFOs in the Bible. “The first chapter of Ezekiel is pretty clear of a UFO sighting,” Burchett said, citing the King James version. “I don’t trust government,” …

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reports: Democrats on Wednesday slammed a Republican-backed change to the Missouri House dress code for women legislators. Rep. Ann Kelley, R-Lamar (photo), proposed explicitly requiring women legislators to wear jackets on the House floor, saying “it is essential to always maintain a formal and professional atmosphere.” Lawmakers debate changes to House rules at the beginning of …

Mediaite reports: Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX) slammed President Joe Biden over his border policies and said the new Republican-controlled House will stop funding the Department of Homeland Security when given the chance. “Well, I guess the president of the United States was able to find the southern border on a map,” Roy began. “Took him two years to finally get …

The Daily Beast reports: Rep. Anna Paulina Luna came to Congress on her first day in office ready to do battle—not just with Democrats, but also with her own party, as she became one of the 20 Republicans to vote against electing Kevin McCarthy speaker. But back home in her conservative Florida district, Luna is waging a very different kind …

The Texas Tribune reports: Texas will no longer fight to ban 18- to 20-year-olds from carrying handguns in public. A judge ruled earlier this year that a state law banning the practice was unconstitutional, and Texas initially filed a notice that it would appeal. But Texas Department of Public Safety Director Steven McCraw withdrew the appeal to the 5th U.S. …

Mediaite reports: A woman who protested at an elementary school while dressed as a cat told Fox News host Jesse Watters Tuesday she did so to prove one cannot change their species in the same way they cannot change their gender. Because America is so often beyond parody in the year of our Lord 2022, Lindsey Graham appeared on the …

“How about this one? A producer for Tucker Carlson Tonight happened to notice that CVS is now selling sex toys. And they appear to be a relative bargain. “For example, there’s a Tush Cush for $11.97, though the accompanying lotion that goes with it will set you back an additional $11.97. “And if you’ve got the cash, right there in …