Opal Covey: I’m Standing Back And Letting God’s Promised Destruction Of Toledo Happen [VIDEO]

“Oooh babba hasha taya!” JMG reader Brian points us to the below post-election interview with Toledo mayoral candidate Opel Covey, who says she’s just going to stand back and let the Lord Almighty Himself proceed with his promised destruction of her city for allowing all of her votes to be stolen from her for the fifth time. “God has already told me if I wasn’t on that seat this time, that destruction is gonna come. And I’m standing back and I’m gonna let it happen.” Ms. Covey apparently lives on a VERY busy road.

  • 3-Star

    Thank you, President Reagan. Your legacy lives on!

  • James

    Questions the interviewer should have asked:

    Why is god powerless to overcome these human fraudsters?

    Will you be leaving ahead of the expected destruction?

    What if the expected destruction doesn’t come?

    Are you crazy?

  • I thought God had already smited Toledo?

    • KCMC

      smote?

      • smoted?

        • PhillyProfessor

          done smite?

          • Octavio

            Smote salmon! Deelish!

      • RoFaWh

        smitten

        I smite you today.
        I smote you yesterday.
        I have smitten you twice.

        • I’ve been smitten a few times but it wasn’t returned. (Frikin’ straight boys)

      • Gianni

        correct

        • KCMC

          Betty Bowers recent tweet, “you were smote …”

    • Alex in Idaho

      I’ve been to Toledo, and thought the same thing.

  • KCMC

    God’s Promised Destruction Of Toledo already Happened with those eyebrows.

  • anne marie in philly

    oh go fuck yourself! ain’t gonna happen in a million billion years! so there!

  • bkmn

    I’d put her at about 40 years of huffing from those tailpipes going by.

  • Michael Smith

    If I lived in Toledo, I would be evacuating ASAP.

    • clay

      unless you’ve got a helmet like her hair . . .

  • agcons

    Apart from everything else, one has to admit those eyebrows are awesome.

  • PhillyProfessor

    So painful to see what her life and her choices have done to her, what they have turned her into. Not to mention the possibility/probability of something like Lewy Body Dementia at work.

  • She reminds me of someone, but I just can’t put my finger on it.

  • Octavio

    Wiiga wanda istu paw meow miau! And so it is done Jambai has spoken.

    • Bad Tom

      You’re not speaking in tongues!
      You’re speaking cat.
      ——-
      My cat says the same thing.

  • clay

    mmm-hmmm, yeah, honey, you do that.
    ‘kay, bye.

  • Judas Peckerwood

    So your supposedly all-powerful deity said if you didn’t win… never mind.

  • Guest

    I’ve never visited Toledo but from what I’ve heard, God is doing the rest of Ohio a favor.

    • Steven Leahy

      LOL it ain’t that bad. No worse than many other Ohio cities haha

      • Guest

        I love the CLE.

      • Beagle

        The Husband and I spent a night in Toledo once. Not that bad, but not really memorable, either.

        • fuzzybits

          Toledo has a great museum. I have a love-hate thing about zoo’s but they have a top notch zoo. Plus the first gay bar I went to was in Toledo.⚡

    • JoeBeau

      no, no He is not.

  • Craig S

    How will we know if Toledo is destroyed?

    • When it’s no longer Holy Toledo!

    • BlueberriesForMe

      Opal will let us know.

    • Strepsi

      LOL

  • Octavio

    I wonder what she lives on. I mean financially — not the mercury-laden cat food she eats for dinner. 🙁

    • Bad Tom

      Clearly, not pots of gold.

    • oikos

      She’s sucking at the teat of soshalism. Keep the gubmint away from her Medicare.

    • bambinoitaliano

      Maybe kibbles n bits.

    • ErikDC

      At one point in the video she mentions a job as a prison chaplain. I’m guessing she has a pension of some sort. I’ll let others ponder the irony of a mentally ill women counseling prisoners. Lord have mercy!

      • MDB

        Kyrie eleison !

      • Shelly Steele

        I live in Toledo…she used to own a store on the East side if I remember correctly. Not sure what happened to it. Then again….what happened to the East side to begin with. I don’t think she’s a prison chaplain anymore. She’s just a nutjob.

  • 3-Star

    OMG The sign on her door reads “for service knock hard”. Her tongue does more than speak in an alien dialect.

    • lattebud

      I bet that is her tramp stamp tattoo as well.

      • Dan Robinson

        Oh ew! Good grief that put an image in my head that may kill my enjoyment of sex forever.

    • Michael Abbett

      It looks like she’s serviced plenty because that door is the only clean thing on that porch. Probably had to be replaced due to people either beating on it for service or trying to beat their way out.

  • Grant Hallowbard

    Someone needs to power wash her house, no matter how nutty she is.

    • teeveedub

      I’m pretty sure that a dirty home exterior is the least of her problems.

      Do power washers work on brains?

      • perversatile

        Do power washers work on brains?
        -only if you stomp on her douch bag

        • David Walker

          Do you refer to her campaign manager?

          • perversatile

            I THOUGHT gAWD WAS HER cm

      • pj

        eyebrows?

    • Anastasia Beaverhousen

      Dirty house. Clean soul.

      • David Walker

        Clean mind. Clean body. Take your pick.

      • Tallulah

        Less face paint, more house paint.

  • perversatile
  • Yalma Cuder-Zicci

    This woman is such a weirdo!!! Who would put such emphasis on eyebrows and rouge and completely neglect her eyelids?

    • RoFaWh

      An old woman who’s got the gagas to some degree.

  • 2amor

    No honey, you will never be Mayor… Wow! The crazy is alive with this one.

  • billbear1961

    Redirect, please, to Houston and Kentucky.

  • stuckinthewoods

    She’s the Third Eagle’s lost sister.

    • The Third Harpy of the Apocalypse!

      • BlueberriesForMe

        The Third Lobster of Toledo.

    • MDB

      The Third Vulture of the Crapocalypse.

  • I’m watching American Psycho. I’ve never seen it before. It’s very diabilical.

    • FancyThat

      I think you just gave me the word I was looking for to describe this lady and the coming plagues: DiaBiblical

  • bryan

    She has a touch of the grey gardens about her. But as a political figure she is not much different to Trump, Cruz or Carson.

    • nocadrummer

      Maybe more like Huckabee.

    • Bad Tom

      So if Trump, Cruz, or Carson burst into tongues during the next Republican debate, would it help or hurt their poll numbers?
      ——-
      Jeb! should try it. Couldn’t hurt.

      • Anastasia Beaverhousen

        Santorum should just burst. But think of the mess.

        • RGG

          And the dry cleaning bill!

        • Smokey

          Yes, think of the mess…

      • D. J.

        Jeb can’t roll Rs….

    • TexasBoy

      Yes, but not as endearing as Jackie O’s family

  • geoffalnutt

    Wait a minute! Isn’t “destruction of Toledo” a double negative? I haz a confuse.

    • Robincho

      Hot off the press from The Department of Redundancy Department…

    • OrliJoe in Fla

      I am SO stealing this!

    • JT

      How could you tell?

    • ElenorRigby

      Is that hair on her head or it she wearing a knit hat of some kind?

      • Maybe it’s a snood.

        • David Walker

          Is that the past tense of the verb snow? It snood last night?

          • It’s a 1940’s thing that women used to cover their hair.

          • David Walker

            I know. Like Lily Tomlin’s Ernestine. I was just being ignorant. (It’s hard to tell sometimes.)

          • One ringy dingy

          • Robincho

            The Andrews Sisters and Ernestine brought the snood to its greatest glory, though not simultaneously…

        • 2patricius2

          One of various styles of snoods.

          • Joe in PA

            that looks like the thing they put on a horses tail…to catch the poop. Huh.

      • Paula

        Its a crazed badger.

      • MonochromeMouse
      • Nic Peterson

        All of that Aquanet is why we don’t have an ozone layer anymore.

      • Whitey’s Conspiracy

        “Is that hair on her head or is she wearing a knit hat of some kind?”

        Yes.

      • Paul Julian Gould

        I dunno, but I noticed the Emmett Kelley rouge application the other day… damn… straight old guy here who’s just horrified by such a specimen…

    • Ore Carmi

      Oh my God, that’s hilarious!

      • Vincenza Wilkerson

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  • I grew up near Toledo. Calling in God to destroy it is redundant.

    • Gianni

      😀

  • FancyThat

    As a prophet, Opel speaks in tongues. As a profiteer, she does some other tongue stuff. And in case you forget, the sign on her screen door reminds you, “For Service, Knock Hard,” (really REALLY hard!)

    Is it just me, but is there a little Kim Davis Déjà vu happenin’ here as well?

  • TuuxKabin

    at least she’s entertaining, not at all like the republican candidates. she doesn’t seem hateful, just delusional.

    • Lakeview Bob

      You mean Trump, Fuckabee, Cruz and Carson are not delusional?

      • TuuxKabin

        well no. i was only referring to her. i kinda feel sorry for her. i don’t have any negative feelings about her. i just hope she’s happy and . . . that’s all. maybe she’ll get some help now that she’s ‘out there’ on the internet.

  • She hasn’t aged well at all. She looked much better in her 20’s.

    http://s5.postimg.org/fggd09r3b/97a35c942482fb0422ad081da9b4a16e.jpg

    • Rebecca Gardner

      WTF?

      • RoFaWh

        Come sit here by me.

  • TuuxKabin

    be not too hard. she has a dog, so she can’t be all bad.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    Whenever I hear “speaking in tongues” this Bugs Bunny scene always comes to mind…

    https://youtu.be/ifv-3aSEckA

  • oikos

    Oh yeah

    • JoeBeau

      If it weren’t for Toledo, I wouldn’t exist.

  • JT
    • pj

      nice kitty

  • OrliJoe in Fla

    I thought absynthe wasn’t legal?

  • jmax

    The Ten Plagues of Toledo!

    • Anastasia Beaverhousen

      I so love a good Ten Commandments joke.

      • BlueberriesForMe

        Those of the Jewish faith = “Red Sea Pedestrians”.

      • Robincho

        Hey, Opal, where’s your Moses NOW?…

        • jmax

          Even funnier if you say it in an Edward G. Robinson voice.

      • Cuberly

        😉

      • SockMikey

        What do they call an Egyptian that goes to college to study plumbing?

        – A Pharaoh Faucet Major….

        • jmax

          BOOOOOO!!!!! 🙂

        • Paul Julian Gould

          My lovely wife and I are fighting a really ridiculous bug…. I’ll spare her the reading of that, as she’d attack me… It’s something I’m likely to have come up with, so your mutual sense of humor will get me attacked by proxy…

          Thanks, Mikey…

          • Paul Julian Gould

            OK… I relented and read it to her… after her groan of pain, I did reassure her that it wasn’t my comment,

            To which she replied,

            “Thank God….”

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Well, I can certainly say that fine pharaoh can charm my cobra any time he wants.

      • Todd20036

        My anaconda likes big butts, and I cannot lie

      • Robincho

        Xmas is coming. Too bad you never saw his yul log…

        • BudClark

          NSFW

          • perversatile

            Hubba-Fuckin-Hubba
            Carol Channing tells some very amusing stories about Yul.

          • Paul Julian Gould

            Straight guy here who still had to catch my breath for a moment…

            Was a dashing guy, even in robotic cowboy gear, and dying of lung cancer….

            Some of us allies out here can appreciate true human beauty in all its forms, y’know? LOL

          • perversatile

            hottest android cowboy ever https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lu0UiCQe804

          • Paul Julian Gould

            That would be the guy…

            Then again, a dear friend and lodge brother of mine happens to be a character actor you’ve likely seen without knowing whom he was…

            My lovely wife, and others of my acquaintance regularly get the palpitations seeing his pics…. I can understand why… He’s a gorgeous man, and a noble soul I’m also honored to consider friend and honored and respected Brother.

          • Cackalaquiano

            Did THEY steal her votes? They look like thieving Democrats.

          • Eebadee-eebadee-thatsallfolks

            I wanted to post those but I wasn’t sure about Joe’s policy on NSFW photos. I would put Yul Brynner on the list of the Top 10 hottest guys ever in the whole history of Hollywood, but I liked him even better after he went bald than when he had the hair in these photos.

          • jmax

            My mother always thought Yul was the hottest man on the planet. We had to watch The Ten Commandments every time it was on TV.

          • JVB

            damn!!!

    • Larry Ft Pierce

      “HIS god IS God.”

  • Ray Page

    Pat Robertson in drag?

  • FLL

    There’s one thing wrong with her eyebrows. Her eyebrows are alive! They have a creepy life of their own. Her eyebrows are like small animals, lizards perhaps. They jump and scurry back and forth, and beyond all else, her eyebrows draw such attention to themselves that you don’t even listen to what this woman is saying. The grotesque hairdo provides a suitable backdrop.
    W-h-a-t___T-h-e___F-*-c-k?!

  • Dan Robinson

    I have mixed feelings about laughing at this poor deluded woman. Mind you I don’t eschew laughing. But I do have mixed feelings about it.

    • Lars De

      I genuinely feel sorry for her, she’s clearly troubled. It won’t stop me from chuckling, but it’s sad that she lives with this delusional fantasy.

    • 2guysnamedjoe

      thank you for posting that. I think most of us are fortunate to have a supportive, loving community and ‘a life’. she seems to have nothing but her dementia. feeling very bleeding heart today after yesterday’s elections and all.

  • TexasBoy

    Crazy people hear voices in their head. An amusement park in Toledo? They already have Cedar Point in Sandusky. Hard to compete with that. Modern amusement parks are expensive to build, and big guns, like Universal and Disney would need to operate year round which is impossible in the Toledo climate.

    Why would she want to be mayor of Toledo in 2 years if God is going to destroy Toledo no because she wasn’t elected. The stupid…it burns.
    Holy Toledo…somebody had to say it.

    • Jimmie Z

      If we were in Norway, we’d say, “She’s TEXAS!”

  • WNY

    Look out, Toledo! Opal has access to the red button!

  • Anastasia Beaverhousen

    Why does it say knock hard for service on her door? Eeeekkkkkk.

    • bryan

      Half price exorcisms prior to the destruction… or maybe she offers tongue lessons..

  • Paula

    Oh Opel, PLEASE DON’T DESTROY Toledo. Please, what ever will we do. I’m begging you.
    So if nothing happens, I will know that you listened to me. And I can say I saved Toledo.

    • pj

      have you ever been to toledo?

      • Paula

        No, I just want to send them a bill for saving the city. Toledo? That’s in the Ohio Territories, isn’t it?

        • pj

          yeah near the dead great lake

        • GanymedeRenard
          • perversatile

            Gawd forbid -that’s whttp://thumbs.ebaystatic.com/d/l225/m/mzMK2_HDRorv87mPr6EojAw.jpghere cocktail swords come from.

          • Paul Julian Gould

            Don Inigo Montoya’s dad’s stash, obviously…

          • Mister Don

            Looks pretty good here

          • GanymedeRenard

            It does. Gloomy and regal, in all its Mannerist, 16th-century glory.

      • BlueberriesForMe

        That’s where Max Klinger is from.

        • pj

          i rest my case

      • Eebadee-eebadee-thatsallfolks

        I have. I was gonna say, her threat to destroy Toledo (Ohio) immediately reminded me of Dorothy Parker’s famous reply when they told her Predisent Calvin Coolidge died: “How can they tell?”

        • pj

          exactly

    • james_from_cambridge

      I think Toledo made a serious mistake. The LOL’s they could have had!! My irony/trainwreck loving heart is disappointed.

      • Paul Julian Gould

        Funny thing is, she actually got 400 votes…

        Even discounting family/extended family/inbred kinfolks, I do wonder if the rest weren’t just really bored folks that wanted to just see what the hell would happen were she to actually win…

        • james_from_cambridge

          True. There are those of us who like to see a little chaos thrown into the system, LOL.

          • Paul Julian Gould

            Johnny Lennon’s “Spaniard in the Works,” I presume? LOL

  • Marc

    She’s certainly nothing if not a fascinating insight into mental illness

  • TexasBoy

    Opel’s button of mass destruction

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiTDIhVmHoQ

  • Someone needs to check her backyard for missing house cats and her oven for fat little boys.

  • LonelyLiberal

    Black hair dye causes insanity.

    • noni

      Now there is a BlackHead Dissolving Gel commercial from Proactive displaying —> because of your comment.

      • LonelyLiberal

        It could be worse. I could have mentioned anal bleaching or pubic hair wigs.

  • Dagoril

    Mommy Dearest called, and she would like her eyebrows back.

  • noni

    I hate it when my gray roots show.

  • skrekk

    Based on the election results it seems that there are 522 more loons in Toledo.

    • No that was the result of the Diebold vote flipping feature. The actual votes for Opal came from her church’s women’s group… well about 1/3 of the ladies voted for her.

  • Dear Opal,

    You are diaper-eating crazy. THAT is all.

    • rabbit_ears

      Her cheese didn’t just slide off her cracker; it hurled itself with great force across the room, against the wall and then melted.

  • Jason Ergott

    My problem w/ these sorts of things is, if the proclaimed destruction doesn’t happen, her or her followers might feel the need to help it along. It would be funny if it wasn’t so scary.

    • Now there, would the Republican Party do something like start Armageddon so Jebus will make his come back and rapture them away for doing “god’s work”? Would a President Carson (shudder) do something like that? Voting matters.(see Kentucky & Houston)

  • David Walker

    Her skin should be green. That is such an “I’ll get you, my pretty” pose.

    • Craig Howell

      “And your little dog, too!”

  • noni

    Donald Trump’s mentor.

    • Donald Trump’s hair stylist.

      • noni

        all kinds of tips and techniques.

        • “How to use Aqua-net without creating an ozone hole over your house.”

  • noni

    What does she say at 1:27 when god took collins off my teeth?

  • crewman

    […]destruction is gonna come. And I’m standing back and I’m gonna let it happen.

    This is so transparently her ego. A normal person would express some sign of remorse or anxiety at the imminent destruction of their home city. She’s practically kicking her legs in glee.

    • RGG

      Such a high moral stance Opal has taken. She says her god is about to destroy a city of 200K people and she’s “standing back and letting it happen.” Clearly she hasn’t the compassion of the patriarch Abraham who bargained repeatedly with his god to save the city of Sodom. Even if that story did turn out badly for the Sodomites (double entendre clearly intended).

      • grada3784

        Especially since I’m sure she got more than 10 votes.

    • Ginger Snap

      And when nothing happens she’ll spout some crap as gawd came to destroy the city and she talked him out of it or some other bullshit.

    • Robincho

      If Toledo were destroyed, it’d be like Dorothy Parker, upon being informed of the death of Calvin Coolidge — “How could they tell?”

  • Ronald Ibach

    Oh dear God will you please rapture her ass, we humbly pray.

  • rabbit_ears

    How does this reporter not just stand there with eyes glazing over?

  • Tony Adams

    I absolutely adore her. Especially when she says,”There was something more I wanted to say there…” I can’t imagine anyone I’d rather have a drink with.

    • noni

      I could handle it only if I was alone with her. If someone else along we would be dying from suppressed and unrelenting laughter.

      • Tony Adams

        Two Martinis in, she’d be saying “Fuck it. Wanna hear me do tongues?”

  • Baby Dave

    Is her name Opel or Opal? You’ve spelled it both ways here

    • noni

      The letter you are sending will arrive with either spelling.

    • rabbit_ears

      Oompaloompa?

    • BobSF_94117

      An example of multiple personality disorder when there’s not a lot of, uh, real estate to divvy up?

    • Beagle

      Depends. Is she a car or a gem?

      • Baby Dave

        My guess is a badly made Soviet era four door sedan

  • JoeBeau

    As a native Toledoan, what you guys won’t do is defame and denigrate my fair city just because of one crazy woman. That’s what you really won’t do. No huh. No ma’am. A’int gonna happen. No way José. You think you might be able to get away with it, but no you cannot.

    • I’m from Pittsburgh. Relatives lived in Toledo. The only thing worse than going to Toledo was driving through Youngstown to get there.

      • JoeBeau

        try athens

        • I’m not allowed to go to Athens per the terms of my probation. Long story. Don’t ask.

        • Steven Leahy

          Try Lima! LOL

        • fuzzybits

          I love Athens.

      • JoeBeau

        my half-brother lives in Dretroit. Trust me, it could be worse.

        • I’ll see your Detroit and raise you annual vacations at Presque Isle, Pa. On the shores of the beautiful Lake Erie.

          • clay

            Hey! at least a few fish can actually survive in Lk. Erie again.

          • Not in 1983 LOL

          • clay

            true.

          • MDB

            Holy Presque Isle, Bat-boy !!!!! I’ll throw in Conneaut Lake, Pa. for no extra charge.

          • You seem to know your way around Western PA, my friend.

          • MDB

            I survived growing up in Forest and Warren counties, and then got the hell out of there.

          • I feel ya. I do miss finding a good pierogi down here.

      • MDB

        Yay-men.

      • perversatile
    • Steven Leahy

      Agree, it ain’t that bad LOL, I have been there many times.

    • RJ Tremor

      Good memories of going there to a game ‘n comics store with a good friend before moving down south. He moved to Reno himself. He got the better end of the deal.

  • bambinoitaliano

    Please stand way way way back. Like really way back that we won’t hear her mumble jibberish.

  • noni
    • hudson11

      eek, that looks like a scene out of Grey Gardens.

    • Friday

      …..s of perception. 🙂

  • Piercedchrlz

    For the life of me I can’t understand why Pat Robertson hasn’t snatched her up to co-host the 700 Club with him or better yet give her an editorial segment. That would get the cash flow going!

    • when cousins are two of a kind

      Strong resemblance, but he is more clever with the eyebrow pencil.

  • Claude Jacques Bonhomme

    Speaking in tongues raises a question:
    Is she the Numa Numa Guy in drag?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuTgvV0fFCY

  • Was someone murdered at 2:08 – 2:11?

  • Bill T.

    Elvira, Mistress Of The Dark, wants her mother to come home and stop bothering the good people of Toledo.

  • HadIt

    Isn’t there some sort of mental competency test you have to take to run for anything? She clearly needs one.

    • kevin vincent

      She only got 1% of the votes people agree

    • Friday

      The nation needs one. Also for journalists. At least an *honesty* test.

  • Marides48

    Pat Robertson in drag???

    • MDB

      Jan Crouch with an extreme suntan 😉

  • Macbill

    God stole her eyebrows, so she had the local tattoo artist give her some new ones, along with the permanent rosy cheeks.

  • pleasebereasonable

    Well don’t say no warned ya!

  • 2patricius2

    Is she still in Toledo? If so, I guess she is not afraid of being squashed by her god.

    • Friday

      Profile says she hopes to watch others suffer, whether or not she dies, cause, Christianity’s all about fearing dying. She’d be terrified if some disaster struck, of course, but the thought she’s not exempt from what she wishes on others will not have entered her mind: like an abused child that turns abusive she thinks she’ll be vindicated/make it be someone else her God hurts if she hurts others. The rest is window-dressing.

  • Kevin Perez
  • Jmdintpa

    give her a gun.. isnt that what we do with crazy people in america

  • Wasn’t Klinger from Toledo?

    • AuntieCol

      You win the internet!

  • Michael Abbett

    Oh Papa Tooney. We’ve got a Looney.

    • perversatile

      “let’s get high and iron the girls hair”

  • Jimmie Z

    It’s just sO sad when black shoe polish seeps into the cranial cavity and poisons a brain.
    You’d think shoe polish manufacturers would be required to post warnings on the labels!?

  • Taleisin

    So full of christian love, or hate.
    I’ll let you decide.

  • grada3784

    When is the destruction scheduled? I’ll need chips.

  • In other Breaking Batshit Crazy news: “Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson told graduates during a commencement address in the late ’90s that he believed the pyramids in Egypt were built by the biblical figure Joseph to store grain, and not, as most archaeologists contend, as tombs for pharaohs.”

    • noni

      I say unto you I wipe my feet toward you and the lord shall do unto you.

      a ddididididiiidididididididiiddd iiiiiddddiiidididiididid

    • Friday

      I wouldn’t actually put it past him, but if he gets elected, do you think we can pass off some infrastructure projects as a means to store the contents of a grain silo and a half cause that ought to do it if his God hates queers enough?

  • Happy_Housewife

    Everything about her – from those eyebrows, to that hairdo, to that peeling paint, to the crooked chain link, to that refrigerator (?) on the porch, but especially that cross around her neck, is absolutely amazing. She’s my favorite new drag queen (but that may be because I didn’t turn the sound up)

  • Opal, if you are reading this, can you throw in Columbus Ohio and make sure it happens before the Michigan-Ohio State game on November 28? Thanks.

  • RobynWatts

    Well, Ms. Covey….oggie oggie oggie boo…get the fuck out of here, will you?!!

  • GayOldLady

    Lady, the last time I went to Toledo, it looked as if God had already been through

    • lynden55

      Yeah, I wasn’t smitten with that smote hole either.

      • Michael Abbett

        “Smote” hole means something very different over at the urban dictionary…

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    Oh, wow, she’s just bat shit, cat shit, fucked up crazy.

    And her porch looks like crap.

    • Friday

      They should, if the title ‘reporter’ is ever supposed to mean anything again.

  • Breaking RWNJ news… Liberty University in final talks to be site of next GOP debate.

    • GanymedeRenard

      Let them. Shit belongs in cesspools.

  • bob

    There should really be some sort of mental evaluation required to run for public office. Even the dog was trying to tell her to stop !

    • DaddyRay

      523 votes…. WHY indeed

      • Johnny Wyeknot

        May be a shipment of bad drugs.

    • RJ Tremor

      That’s actually the first time I’ve listened to someone “speaking in tongues”. Yeah, that’s not something a lot of Christians endorse anyway. Every sect of Christianity believes they’re supreme and every other sect has a problem.

      • Oscarlating Wildely

        just varying shades of different types of looney in my book.

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Oh speaking in tongues– nothing better for a lovely end of a day.
      How in the hell can anyone watch this horseshit and not realize what a crock of shit this whole charade is, on so, so many levels?

      • bob

        My grandma did it sometimes. It always scared us. Her father was a traveling preacher and when little, she would to go around with a tambourine and collect money. If she was faking , she took it to her grave. My mom was very stubborn, but never messed with my dad’s mom, lol.

    • GanymedeRenard

      Just curious – is she cursing in some variety of Orkish, or is it the Black Speech of Mordor itself? The doubt is KILLING me!

      • Friday

        It’s called ‘Glossolalia.’ Aka ‘gibberish.’ Tolkien was a real linguist. These are not ‘tongues,’ just people who threw a timing belt between the brain and the mouth, to oversimplify. 🙂

        • GanymedeRenard

          I know all that, of course! 🙂 I was hesitant to choose between Orkish and Parseltongue, but then again I should have added “snark” at the end of my post. XD

  • GanymedeRenard
  • sikkentarred

    In a weird way, I was kinda liking her, like she could be your wacky neighbor. But then around 6:15 she gets a little scary…

    • Friday

      In my neighborhood *we’re* the ‘wacky neighbors.’ It’s the people with crosses all over everything where you hear the shouting and screaming.

  • greenmanTN

    Granted she sets herself up for it, and she really isn’t TOO far off from what passes for mainstream evangelical thought and behavior, but Opal is clearly mentally ill.

    • Friday

      It’s never ‘mainstreamEvangelicals’ you gotta fear walking down the street, just anyone crazy enough to believe them.

  • Joseph Miceli

    It’s over.
    Someone please get this woman and all the Christians the mental help they need.

    • Friday

      Wiell, wouldn’t it suck if we *are* the mental help. Lady, but that’s the picture of ‘Work cut out for you, then.’

      We’re dealing with lunacy here.

  • Jim

    Five years from now she’ll either be in the loony bin or she’ll be the CEO of a world-wide religious enterprise that broadcasts “Miracle of Toledo Ministries” on hundreds of TV stations and rakes in millions of dollars in annual revenue.

  • bambinoitaliano

    Poor kitty.

  • ByronK

    Clearly a woman who is suffering a serious mental health condition. Much like the majority of the Republican candidates.

  • noni

    Opal plans to be Laffing Sal at her planned amusement park.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiVh9jVKxug

  • Johnny Wyeknot

    I love her totally! She wants to build a dinosaur Park. How cool is that! There’s a pretty good one just north of Front Royal, Virginia, by the way!

  • PhilBob13

    I want to laugh at her, but then I hear the dog barking in this and I think, “fuck! that *#%$ has animals again!” And we know she abuses animals, which makes her not comical, but evil. Grrrr!

    • Gustav2

      We don’t know she abuses animals.

      • Reality.Bites

        She was charged with animal abuse.

        • Gustav2

          So she is just crazy.

      • PhilBob13

        She’s been convicted of 14 counts of animal cruelty. I doubt she has changed her ways.

  • William

    First off, those eyebrows will be chasing me in my dreams.
    Second, a special secret message for Opal.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JO6q9eOQq5g

  • DumbHairyApe

    Nothing wrong there.

  • MattPS

    I’ll go the high road and I won’t mention anything about her appearance. She’s an old lady, after all; most of us might be headed down the same route in terms of having an “eccentric” look about us. But LORDY, that house of hers! The folks over at Lurid Digs could have a field day describing it, without ever venturing inside. And there are other details: The guy screaming at 2:10 (or thereabouts)–WHAT’S UP WITH THAT?!, the way she seems to know what she’s going to say, but then suddenly goes blank…but most of all, I’m fascinated by what her EYES are saying (no, not her eyebrows; her eyes themselves.) Most of the time she’s just like somebody’s Grams or Great-Grams, cheery. But check out her eyes at 6:30! she really starts laying on the fire and brimstone, and it shows in her gaze! Then there’s another thing that interests me about her: I’ve heard body-language experts say that when a person’s lying, that person will always look upward and to the left , especially when answering a question. But Miss Opal always looks straight at the camera, unflinching. SHE REALLY DOES SEEM TO BELIEVE ALL THE HORSESHIT THAT SHE’S SAYING! And man, does she obsess over what Democrats do with people’s money! Is she saying that a tax-free society would be better. by any chance? Does she realize just what THAT would mean for Toledo’s poor?

    • Gustav2

      Of course she believes. What else does she have?

  • MDB

    “Gawd don’t take that stuff,” really honey ??? Gawd do NOT like fugly.

  • GanymedeRenard

    I wonder what El Greco would think if a soothsayer prophetess tried to destroy his city of adoption in the 21st century. Oh, wait… Are we talking about the same Toledo?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/529ac81b6f1ea2e58b83258066613e285d749cb41dc26968ae580deff2b80c98.jpg

  • Jimmy

    Dude I’m Jimbo! Thanks for the shoutout man!

  • MattPS

    How about that sign on the door: “For service, knock HARD”! How’s that again, Opal?

    • TampaDink

      Its a hard knock life.

      • Gustav2

        It probably was.

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  • Edmund Allin

    And Ben Carson re-iterates his belief that the pyramids were used to store grain.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ben-carson-pyramids-grain-storage_563a7d2fe4b0307f2cabdf3e

    • Gustav2

      He is Seventh Day Adventist. Reading the Bible with a modicum of historical or archaeological basis or any sense is not their dogma. Think Scientology Christian.

      • Edmund Allin

        Thanks, I’ll read up about them.

  • BudClark

    Just as long as He spares Holy Rosary Cathedral and that magnificent old 4-manual E.M. Skinner pipe organ!

  • barrixines

    I must get Opal’s recipe for squid ink cotton candy.

  • Friday

    One thing that pisses me off about Christianists demanding cities be destroyed. No damn respect for the lakes all their crap would drain into.

  • I see Snow White finally went to the Dark Side when they fired her from Disneyland.

  • Whitey’s Conspiracy

    Well, since the almighty has her authorization I guess nothing can save Toledo now.

  • Whitey’s Conspiracy

    Betty White’s long lost acid head identical twin?

  • TheSpinMonkey

    she sounds as sane as any other christian

    • Gustav2

      You have no idea what you are talking about do you?

      • TheSpinMonkey

        common thread, invisible people speaking to you. Claim it is God and it is classified religion any other entity and it is auditory hallucination – cray either way!!

        • Gustav2

          Painting all Christians with the same brush is prejudice. Yes, her version is a bit off. There are many, many versions. You still have no idea what you are talking about.

          • TheSpinMonkey

            God, Unicorn, Santa, Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy if it makes you happy to celebrate and worship them I fully support your choice.

  • Porkie

    Opal Honey, I jus’ got a message from God and she says:
    ” Girlfriend dance ya buns off! It’s 80s night”
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6LfdI9AmOc

  • Gustav2

    We all have nutzo elderly in our families. Enough

  • canoebum

    She needs to stand back and call someone to power wash that siding.

    • Gustav2

      Social Security doesn’t pay the whole water bill.

  • Comixbear

    😉

  • chris james

    Mental illness in the elderly is such a sad thing to see. Let’s hope her god takes her home real soon.

  • dcurlee

    I’m just wondering how many nut job voted for her

    • Reality.Bites

      523 or 532. (I’m not dyslexic, my memory is)

  • geoffalnutt

    Those eyebrows are spray-painted on…RustOleum, I believe. You can get it down at Spivey’s Hardware/Beauty Emporium. Get your stencil at the Hobby Lobby.

  • Skokieguy

    So God allowed her votes to be stolen, so God is going to destroy Toledo?

    So either God has some serious self-hatred going on [Yawehphobe?] or perhaps Opal should consider worshiping a God that’s a bit more effective at the whole Dominion over the World thing?

  • The Professor

    Yea, sure. She’s just a harmless old coot. Until she decides to use Second Amendment remedies on downtown Toledo.

    • TexasBoy

      Oh, she wouldn’t decide to do that . God would TELL her to do that, and she’d have to obey. Baata Neuloa Bamba Bausch…see, He was just speaking now.

      • The Professor

        LOL!

  • Marides48

    Why does she want to be mayor of a destroyed city?

    • noni

      Because it will have an amusement park.

  • StevenG

    ….

  • Xuuths

    Every time she speaks, more people become atheists.

  • TheManicMechanic

    May god start by burning down that filthy wreck of a house. Preferably with this shriveled shrew inside.

  • noni

    The LGBT Community should hire Opal to do campaign commercials explaining that men will dress up like woman and enter women’s bathrooms if you vote yes for equality. She could provide the “gruesome” details as only Opal can and to top it off she could do a bit of talking in tongues. A false flag of sorts. Could backfire though since the religious would find her totally sane.

  • Sean Taylor

    Well, Opal while you’re standing there take a hose to that filthy house.

  • David Shelton

    You know, ANYONE can claim that “god” told them something and then start speaking gibberish to prove it!

    “God told me I’m going to be the President of the United States in 2016. Humana basha coptiticapicious unundurundus habada habada peepee enchilada!”
    There, that’s all the proof you need!

  • Dead Giveaway

    Shes’ standing back and letting it happen? What’s she gonna do otherwise?

  • Scott

    So the Lord told her if she wasn’t elected this time he was going to destroy Toledo. But I thought that God knew all things, so why would he use the word “if?” Since God is all knowing I don’t think he would have told her if at all.

    This woman is just further proof that religious extremism is a mental disorder. Hearing voices is not real nor is it normal it is a sign of mental issues and needs to be treated as such. But they can hide behind religion safely and remain in public. But when one of them starts shooting up a store, school or building because God told them too, then they are nuts. So is she going to do something?