Jesse Watters: The Piss Tape Story Is Obviously Fake Because Nobody Would Sleep In A Urine-Soaked Bed

The New York Daily News reports:

Jesse Watters defended President Trump on Thursday night, claiming the most lurid details in the Steele dossier don’t make “any sense.” Because….who wants to sleep in a urine-soaked bed?

On Thursday, Fox News host Sean Hannity raised the “golden shower” allegations detailed in the unverified Steele dossier, which claimed President Trump was compromised during a 2013 visit to Moscow. That’s when Watters jumped in with his hot take.

“And you know it’s not true because if someone pees in the bed, where are you going to sleep? Where are you going to sleep? It’s obviously not true, that doesn’t make any sense.”

Panelist Jessica Tarlov appeared stunned into silence for a split second before saying, “I don’t think he is having a sleepover with them. I think it’s transactional, I don’t think it’s a cuddlefest.”

Start the clip at 2:45.

  • Boreal
  • Boreal
    • Nowhereman

      I wonder if there’s a Lego version.

  • Boreal
  • olandp

    As I recall the entire idea was to degrade the bed that Barrack and Michelle Obama had slept in.

    • kareemachan

      Evidently, that’s too nuanced for this twunt.

      And yeah, I know he’s a guy. He’s still a twunt.

    • Snownova

      Gaia only knows the atrocities he must have committed against the bed in the White house master bedroom, if a hotelroom bed where O spent a single night was worthy of that.

      • zhera

        You can be sure that he’s not using the same bed as the Obamas used.

        • Paula

          Those kind of people slept in it!

  • Yalma Cuder-Zicci

    “And you know it’s not true because if someone pees in the bed, where are you going to sleep?”

    Seriously, where would a supposed billionaire sleep if the bed was peed? What’s a billionaire to do?

    • Chris Baker

      haha, yes. This wasn’t the Airport Co-Z-Motel, it was a fancy hotel. You call housekeeping to change the sheets, or just move to a different room. Or more than likely it was a suite with several bedrooms.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      If obama slept in that bed, trump wouldnt sleep in it, clean or not.

    • JackFknTwist

      Well if that’s the main argument against the Dossier, it obviously proves the truth of the material in the dossier.

      What a stupid thing to say.

      All of the Steel dossier is true, most of it has been corroborated…..there are some parts that cannot be corroborated…..the pee pee scenes.
      Now if we could only get our hands on that tape.

      • McSwagg

        It would be telling if, like the Nixon tapes, a few crucial minutes were missing.

  • Gustav2

    Hotel suites usually have more than one bedroom. The ladies pee’d on the bed the Obamas used, Donnie laughed, he went to the other bedroom to sleep.

    • Acronym Jim

      Even cheap hotel rooms often come with more than one bed. Watters is either a moron or he needs to travel more…or both.

      I hear Siberia is lovely this time of year.

      • Gustav2

        The cheap No Tell Motels Watters uses by the hour often do not have two beds.

        • olandp

          I’m sure they are also urine soaked.

          • Gustav2

            A “friend” told us, right?

          • Mark

            rubber backed mattress pad….

      • Judas Peckerwood

        “Watters is either a moron or he needs to travel more…or both.”

        You left out the most obvious answer: He’s a paid liar.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      Yes. Orange bastard wanted to defile the bed the obamas slept in.
      Can u just imagine the ear busting ruckus of the rightwing whacko-sphere if this had been a liberal having hookers pee on rethug presidents bed???

    • DesertSun59

      It’s quite literally as simple as that.

    • The_Wretched

      And room service can swap out a mattress. Especially for a top end celeb.

  • netxtown

    good thing he got into a job that provides him with a script. no way he could think his way through much of anything.

    • CanuckDon

      I’m betting he wrote that script though.

  • Harveyrabbit

    Has anyone ever asked Melania what she has to say about Cheetolini’s pee habits? I doubt she’s impressed.

  • Michael R
  • It Takes a Village, People

    Any decent pervert knows that you don’t actually pee in the bed. You move the action to then bathtub or your pervert den in the basement with a floor drain. Or so I’ve heard.

    • Steven in Texas

      So that’s what the floor drain is for.

      • Ginger Snap

        Yup, so you can hose down the place after the weekend party.

      • It Takes a Village, People

        What else would you use it for?

  • ChrisMorley

    NY Daily News is doing a Fox News lying job.

    The Steele dossier has been largely corroborated by US and other sources.

    It’s just the pee video bit that, so far, remains “unverified”.

    • lymis


  • CanuckDon

    FOX logic appealing to FOX viewers.

    • Michael White

      their logic is based entirely on a false premise: Fox NEWS.

  • Scott E D

    Jesse Watters has the most punchable face on TV.

    • Buford

      I envision a robust pushing down the stairs…

    • Dayglo

      That insipid fixed expression is perfect for Fox News.

  • Leo
  • canoebum

    Do they come any more stupid than this? Is it possible Trump’s suite had more than one room? What “billionaire” stays in a hotel without his entourage and multiple rooms?

    • djcoastermark

      And obviously they never heard of waterproof or rubber sheets.

      • CanuckDon

        Or fetish. Or childish revenge.

      • lymis

        Or sleeping in another room, allowing housekeeping to clean up after your kinky activities.

        • William

          Be sure to tip according to the level of depravity.

          • McSwagg

            “LesbianTippingHabits” has infected our dear William.

    • Steven in Texas

      Yes the voters.

  • Leo
    • DaddyRay

      Well when you factor in that it was Trump and Hannity you could make the case that there was no Intelligence on the call

  • Stogiebear

    Sometimes naïvetés are cute. Other times they’re faked and on FOX News.

    • Nic Peterson

      Jesse isn’t cute at all.

  • Bluto
    • mikemmiv


    • KarenAtFOH

      Stepford Son

    • prixator

      He asked for more money for season 2 and they told him he was replaceable.

  • greenmanTN

    How weird is it that our political discourse has become about golden showers?

    For what it’s worth, the story was never that Trump likes to get peed on (though I’d lovej to do it), but that the Russian prostitutes he hired peed on a bed Obama had slept in before.

    If true, that’s a whole DSM full of psych issues for that to appeal to him.

    • zhera

      And we all know that there’s only bed in an entire hotel, especially the luxury hotels that Donnie uses…

      • Nowhereman

        Ah! A composting toilet. It would probably spit him back out.

    • Nowhereman

      I don’t even know which would be worse. I think I might be OK with him wanting to be peed on. But his obsession with the Obamas is just beyond the beyond. What a pitiful little man Donnie is.

  • zhera

    Well, Watters, maybe Donnie likes to sleep in a piss-soaked bed. Just because YOU don’t like it doesn’t mean nobody does.

  • SkokieGuy

    Why would they even bring this up, unless more corroboration about the tape is about to be released and the propaganda arm of the WH wants to get out in front of the story?

    • Dave B

      Well, the White house and Fox noise do work together on the talking points.

    • lymis

      They want people to think of the Steele dossier as some form of criminal indictment, where all the specific allegations have to be true for any of it to be considered.

      That isn’t even how actual criminal indictments work.

      It’s certainly not how a summary of how the sort of thing Steele was doing works. He was reporting on the entire scope of what the people he spoke to told him they understood had happened, It was clear from the very beginning that any of the specifics in his reports might not bear up under independent investigation, or that some of the things that were true might not have objective evidence available to definitively prove.

      But all that would mean would be that the actual legal authorities would simply say that there was, in fact, definitive proof of items 1 – 2,014,892, but not of the specific pee play rumor.

      Still, given what Trump has publicly said he gets up to throughout his life, anyone who claims it’s unthinkable that that specific item is true hasn’t been paying attention.

      • SkokieGuy

        Exactly. And of course the pee stuff is the least important, but for them to bring it up I think means that someone has a good feeling that leaks ( ! ) are going to happen. And I also agree that its totally plausible that it happened. He gets off on revenge and denigrating the black guy that is so superior in every way. It may well be entertainment thought up and provided by his Russian hosts knowing that it would appeal to Trump.

  • Boy Elvis

    Jesse Watters: answering the age-old question of whether a turd can smirk.

  • Buford

    “There’s no way Trump had sex with Stormy Daniels… he was MARRIED at the time! Married men can’t have sex with other ladies!!” – Jesse Watters (probably)

  • Ginger Snap

    Hey idiot spend some time on porn sites and you’ll find millions who do.

  • edrex

    don’t pretend you don’t know how fetishes work.

  • pgarayt

    Your country spends way, way too much time giving attention to ugly liars and it isn’t going to lead anywhere good. A concerned neighbor.

  • Skeptical_Inquirer

    That is one of the dumbest defenses ever. It would be like claiming Vitter couldn’t have worn diapers because only babies wear diapers.

    • cleos_mom

      It Depends.

  • Jay Silversmith

    I don’t know nothin about no peeing, but every dude at the bar spewed their beers when don the con bragged about his dik size in the debates.

  • BobSF_94117

    He has a point. It’s not like an alleged billionaire can, you know, rent two rooms…

  • lymis

    Someone doesn’t understand how hotels work. Or how piss play works. Or how prostitution works. Or how kink works. Or how Russia works.

  • kanehau


  • Christopher
  • DesertSun59

    No child who has ever peed the bed has ever slept in it.
    No adult who has ever peed the bed has ever slept in it.

    Alt-facts from the Office of Propaganda.

  • Christopher
  • sfjohn

    such a goddamn idiot…….

  • KaBoomBOX

    The dis-information campaign has begun, so you know they know it’s real.

  • Darrel Cj

    Actually it makes perfect sense that Trump slept in a urine-soaked bed, or that he concocted the pee-whatever scheme. He’s a known germaphobe, and from the point of view of a germaphobe, defiling a bed associated with your opponent with a prostitute’s urine (= ULTRA dirty) is the most vulgar insult conceivable.

  • Halou

    I’ll take $0.02 for “You call room service to clean up a what?”

    Also who says he slept there, and not just hire the room the Obamas previously slept in for the sole purpose of defiling it? As was stated in the Steele dossier. The FSB would have fixed him another room.

  • Nowhereman

    What a fucking idiot. I’m sure I’m not the first to point that out.

  • Raising_Rlyeh

    Oh, you poor sheltered man-child.

  • northern_neighbour

    So sez Faux News’ Fake Ex-Spurt, Watters, on the intricacies of RevengePorn WattersSports.

    I however smell (yecccchttt!) a urine soaked Rat that smacks of COLLUSION.

    And Bingo!, Jesse gets his Alternative Narrative Bonus from FAUX/TRUMP for pouring OIL on troubled PreZidential Watters-Falls, a.k.a. ‘Golden showers.’

  • -M-

    I hate how they can throw out complete non sequitors because their base just wants sound bites to latch onto.

    A) The pee-pee tape is the least damning thing mentioned in the Steeled dossier you ignorant doof.

    B) When it’s after midnight and someone celebrates the end of a beauty pageant by having prostitutes piss on the hotel bed where the Obama’s once slept, he’s not worried about sleeping there. If his buzz wears off before he leaves in his private jet there are plenty of other rooms, several of which they’re already paying for.

  • (a) I’m not going to name names but I 100% know people who would sleep in a piss-soaked bed. (Not me, though — gross.)

    (b) It was a suite. A suite good enough for a sitting U.S. President to stay in. Gonna bet there was more than one bed in that suite.

    • -M-

      A luxury suite. In a hotel, that has lots of rooms. Where Donnie two-scoops had just held an international beauty pageant, that would have rented a lot of rooms.

      • William

        A five star hotel will deliver a new mattress at 3:00AM no questions asked. An extra charge will be on the bill. Thre’s also a fee for delivering a live duck to your room.

        • The_Wretched

          In Russia you can also order a dead girl if the live duck is not to your tastes.

          • William

            The hotel I stayed at in Russia, there was a guy who sat in the lobby all night. At one point, he asked in I needed a woman sent to my room.

          • Lars Littlefield

            Did you?

          • William

            No, my Parcheesi set was at home. Besides, I saw one of those ‘ladies’. She would have put me in traction.

  • The_Wretched

    Faux News feels like it has to work to undercut the “Steele Dossier” ?! Right wingers are premessaging and defending the Nunes memo before its release.

  • William

    People have been known to use hotel rooms only for their twisted sexual activities, and then leave. So I’ve heard.

    • Lars Littlefield

      Naw. You’re making that up.

  • Lars Littlefield

    He needs a ball gag, rubber suit and electrodes attached to his nut, then asked “Who would think this could be a turn on?”

  • JWC

    typical FAUX Rabble Gabble

  • Ham

    Tell that to my mother-in-law.

  • Brooklyn Joe

    I don’t think he is having a sleepover with them!

    What a jerk – some people might like sleeping in their own urine soaked sheets – even prefer it!

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    Speaking of punchable faces…

  • JCF

    If brains were dynamite, Watters couldn’t blow his nose…

  • Gianni

    Sounds like the voice of experience.