Loony Louie Gohmert: If Hillary Had Won, Within Four Years I’d Be In Prison For Being A Christian [AUDIO]

House Rep. Louie Gohmert (R- Crazy Town) had some classically insane things to tell Glenn Beck today:

“That night of the election, I’d already come to grips,” Gohmert said, “the U.S Commission on Civil Rights says that Christians are the biggest hate group threat in America, in essence. And you had Hillary, who wants to make it a crime to say anything negative about radical Islam, and Loretta Lynch [who] were in favor of [making it] a crime to question man-made global warming.”

After making this series of false statements, Gohmert said that he told his wife on the night of the election that “if it doesn’t go well, I’m probably going to be in jail within four years because I’m going to be part of the Christian-loving group that they say is hateful,” and so Trump’s election has “just been such a relief.”

  • Rebecca Gardner

    Goodness that man is a fucking idiot. I just can’t. I got nothing. The stupid is just too vast with that one.

    Speaking of stupid.
    https://twitter.com/brianklaas/status/837641496966868993

    • SFBruce

      And don’t forget that Melania and Barron are running up a tab of more than a million a day by staying in Manhattan.

      • Mark

        I thought is was 500K but hey a few hundred here and a few hundred there, it will eventually turn in to real money!

      • stuckinthewoods

        Melaniantoinette is staying at the Petit Trianon?

      • kaydenpat

        And taxpayers are also funding the travel expenses of Trump’s kids. Unbelievable!

    • Gustav2

      And tell MSNBC to quit calling the for profit Mar-a-lago Club “The Winter White House”

      • BearEyes

        yeah – that’s “The Southern White House”
        /s

        • Oscarlating Wildely

          ( Proudly northern, often forgetful: Did we burn that down? I don’t remember.)

      • Max_1

        The History of Mar-a-lie-go…
        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mar-a-Lago
        At one time it was called just that.

        The federal government soon realized the immense cost of maintenance, annual taxes roughly between $1–3 million, and the difficulty of maintaining security for diplomats.[13] The government returned it to the Post Foundation in 1981, which listed it for sale for $20 million. Dina Merrill and Post’s two other daughters did not maintain the property, expecting to sell it,[14] but there was so little interest that the city approved its demolition to build smaller homes.[15] Mar-a-Lago was declared a National Historic Landmark in 1980.[3][16][17]

        Then Trump bought it. I wonder how the security is today?
        Waiter: Would you like a sideshow of National Security theater with your dinner, sir?

        • Gustav2

          Trump goes so his sycophants can fawn all over him.

          • Heidiaricciardi

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj232d:
            On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
            !mj232d:
            ➽➽
            ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash232ShopNetworkGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!mj232d:….,……….

        • Craig Howell

          FYI, when this says “Post,” they are talking about the late, great Marjorie Merriweather Post, the fabulously wealthy heiress who married more gay men than either Liza Minnelli or Judy Garland. Each year she would have her own version of the Royal Progress, wintering at Mar-A-Lago, summering in New Hampshire, and spending the spring and fall at Hillwood here in DC.

      • Ragnar Lothbrok

        House of Bleak

    • Ragnar Lothbrok
    • Lars Littlefield

      He’s deaf to our concerns and he’s certainly a con. Ya got that right.

    • Max_1
      • kaydenpat

        What Trump is demanding we do, he won’t be doing. Just like he sends other people’s children to fight in Yemen but didn’t go to Vietnam when he had the chance and none of his children are in the military.

        Do as I say and not as I do.

    • kaydenpat

      Obama was Black so you have to triple double quadruple everything negative for him.

    • ChrisMorley

      Mar-a-Lago Neighbors Discover Costs of Trump’s Visits
      https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/19/us/donald-trump-visits-mar-a-lago-businesses.html

      • charemor

        Unbelievable.

    • Bob Conti

      What was Melania’s day today? What are we getting for paying the scads of money taxpayers pay so she can hole up with her penthouse view?

  • safari

    …and Obama has already taken your gun?

    • Yeah, this is the same fucking howler monkey who swore if Obama was re-elected, all the guns would’ve been confiscated by now and Christianity outlawed.

      I’m thinking that prognostication really isn’t Louie’s top skill.

      • Oscarlating Wildely

        That was supposed to happen? Well, for god’s sake get on with it! Slackers.

        • ColdCountry

          Actually, I’ve been thinking I might get a gun. Second amendment goes both ways, but I wonder if, like the subsidies for religious schools, the teabaggers have thought of that.

          • I already own a number of firearms and have known how to use them since my age was in the single digits.

          • ColdCountry

            I used to be an excellent shot with a .22 rifle, but my vision won’t work for long distance anymore, and even using both hands, my shoulders can’t hold a couple of pounds, straight arm, at shoulder height. An acquaintance recently bought a Ruger .22 pistol, but even though it felt super light, I couldn’t hold up at arm’s length for more than a couple of seconds. Scattershot from the hip?

          • BudClark

            Good for you! Sadly, there may come a time when the Left needs them.

      • I didn’t know Louie had any skills.

      • McSwagg

        That part of East Texas is referred to as “behind the piney curtain” in reference to the pine forests indigenous to the area. Methinks the abundant turpentine has rotted his brain.

  • bambinoitaliano

    Millions of America right now and right this moment are willing to trade her in for Drumpf for such an insignificant collateral damage!

  • Fifth-and-a-Half Element
  • Uncle Mark

    Well allegedly “ending up in prison” would be preferable to allegedly “getting shot at one of your townhall meetings” now isn’t it, mutton head? Actually I’d be fine with either scenario

  • Ragnar Lothbrok

    Oh you still might go, but for different reasons

  • Michael

    And now the loony far right wants to make it a crime to exercise any other religious belief except ‘Jesus = Anti-gay Discrimination’.

  • Treant

    Let’s face it, crazypants here keeps getting elected. There are, quite simply, a huge number of completely insane idiots in the USA.

    • Jay George

      And they’re armed.

      • BlueberriesForMe

        Shooting selves in foot included.

        • Jay George

          I’m happy to watch the footage. 😉

    • Octoberfurst

      That’s what kills me. The fact that politicians like Gohmert keep getting reelected. Crazy eyes Bachmann was elected FOUR times before retiring. I can’t image how batshit crazy their constituents must be. To look at someone like Gohmert and think—“Wow we really need to have THIS guy in office! He’s great!”–is an affront to sanity.

      • Mark

        She didn’t retire voluntarily though – she was retired by the votes – thank goodness!

      • Bachmann retired because they redrew the Minnesota district and her’s disappeared. I think Republicans were as happy about that as Democrats. What an embarrassment. Yeah, she retired but it wasn’t voluntary. btw, my Congressman is just as bad, just not on tv as much. At least not yet.

        • Octoberfurst

          That’s good news but think about how loony those people in her district were.

          • George Carlin used to say that when you are born into this world you get a free ticket to the freak show and when you’re born in America you get a front row seat. Yes, anyone who voted for Bachmann or Gohmert or any of the rest of those loons is at least as nutty as they are. I hope we can survive the next four years.

          • Octoberfurst

            Amen to that.

    • BudClark

      Sweetie, his “district” consists of a lamp post, a Wal-Mart, and some shacks in the Piney Woods of Texas. Ain’t no Democrats there TO run against him.

      • Treant

        Import one. 🙂

      • In 2014 my Teabagger congressman ran unopposed. Last year the Democrats actually ran someone and he still got almost 65% of the vote. My area is liberal but we are gerrymanered into deep teabagistan. and now white supremacist flyers are going up everywhere and locals are throwing around racial slurs to people’s faces. It’s ugly out here.

  • Oscarlating Wildely
  • Ninja0980

    No matter what stupid shit he says or does, he will easily get elected again and again.
    Gerrymandering and stupid people work wonders in helping fools like this stay in power.

  • hdtex
  • Kelly Lape

    You belong in prison, but not for the “crime” of being a Christian. I’m willing to bet my personal freedom that if allowed to look into your life we would find many crimes committed in the “name” of “Christianity”

  • Max_1

    Louie Gohmert Pyle-O-Shit

  • liondon#iamnotatraitor

    Right wing victim industry… plenty of money to be had.

  • Jerry Kott

    The reality is that he should be in an Institution of some kind to protect him from himself .

  • another_steve

    My husband is a practicing Christian (but a nice one). In the days leading up to the election we prepared for his possible arrest in the event Hillary won.

    We kept a baseball bat at the front door. We coached our cat on how to go directly for the scrotum of the arresting officer.

    We had a plan.

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Cat attacks to the scrotum are not easily forgotten.
      Sadly, I speak from experience.

      • another_steve

        Mine has this annoying habit of getting on my belly while I’m in bed and pawing at my dick.

        So undignified (for both of us).

        • Mark

          kitties love them little smokies….

          (sorry…I’ll go slap myself…)

        • petewestcentral

          Aw, pussy grabbin’ it.

      • Todd20036

        Ego trip. The cat wanted to be able to take down a human. So it went after the vulnerable spot.

      • Zeldacat

        My cat, who I love dearly, will sometimes stand on my boobs when I’m in bed and she wants attention. She then, of course, does the cat trick of increasing her weight somehow. It hurts like hell. But not as much, I suspect, as a scrotal attack.

    • Gustav2

      But you would not have had a prayer.

    • kaydenpat

      LOL!! Well, he won’t have to worry now that we have a delusional airhead in the White House. We may not have a country but Christians certainly won’t be arrested. Just ask Two Corinthians.

  • BearEyes

    sorry Goober – sometimes dreams and fantasies don’t actually come true.

  • madknits

    i don’t want to hear about his kinky fantasies.

  • Knowing people like him he would be in prison for groping in a gents toilet.

  • sfjohn

    No you’d be locked in an asylum because you’re pathetically insane

  • MT YVR

    No, darlin, that’s not why you’d end up in jail. Most likely it’d have been some shadey as shit illegal activity involving physical, psychological or emotional abuse to some one, somewhere, and at least one revelation of a sexual nature that I find pedestrian and boring but somehow fills you with shame and guilt so horrific that you don’t even notice the pathology of your life’s effort to find a job to vilify yourself in the bodies of others through any means necessary up to and including rank hypocrisy, larceny, violence, abuse and inhuman behaviours towards others. But hey. Call it religion if you like. Whatever.

  • tbj5

    Advanced Whataboutism 401.

    Distract everyone with a fictional alternate timeline Hillary POTUS who would jail Christians.

  • Dutchlander

    Nah! It would have taken her three months. Tops.

  • ColdCountry

    The butthurt is strong in this one.

  • Max_1
    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Jesus’s head is about the size of that T-rex’s.
      Easier to fit the thorns, I guess.

    • grada3784

      Dino Jesus came to town,
      Riding on a T-Rex?

  • TampaDink

    Since she didn’t win (the electoral votes) he won’t be going to prison on her watch but it would not surprise me one bit if he winds up there by his own actions. People who live on the claims of christian martyrdom usually are doing nefarious things that his magic book would condemn.

  • CanuckDon

    “I’d Be In Prison For Being A Christian”

    Christian / moron
    Potato/ crazy fries

  • teedofftaxpayer

    He should be in jail for being so stupid and hateful.

  • Cuberly
  • Sam_Handwich

    go fuck yourself with a cousin

    • Which one? His niece or his mom?

    • MT YVR

      One of my FAVOURITE insults to lob at my friends when they get cheeky.

      “So, just a quick question. If your mom and dad get divorced, are they still brother and sister?”

      😛

    • Octoberfurst

      What? His sister isn’t good enough for him???

  • Lazycrockett
  • PickyPecker
  • PickyPecker
  • Clive Johnson

    Gohmert is like a next door neighbor you try to avoid talking to. But occasionally you’re mowing your yard and he comes up to the fence, beer in hand and says something. You can’t hear him over the motor, so reluctantly you turn off the engine out of politeness and he launches into a rant.

    “I was just watching Alex Jones,” he begins, moving his beer arm about, sloshing some out from the top. “I don’t know if you knew, but we’re on the verge of a communist takeover. Obama’s workin’ with the Muslim Brotherhood to launch a coup against Trump. Betcha didn’t know that.”

    “No, I didn’t. Hey, sorry, I’d be happy to talk, but I’ve gotta get this done. Wife and I are going out for an earlier dinner.”

    He slurps some beer and you wonder if his speech is slurred a little or if he’s always that way. You think about the last time you talked with him and compare.

    He’s not done with you yet.

    “Ya know, if you’re a Christian you’re still not safe from Obama’s persecution. Ya know that?”

    He forced you into rudeness. You hold up your hand as if to say, “I can’t…” and start up the mower again.

    This beer slugging cad is Gohmert and he’s one of the most important people our democracy produces.

    • Jerry

      Except Gohmert would be 10 X worse if he drank beer.

    • Octoberfurst

      I think we have the same neighbor. Mine is on disability but hates people freeloading on the tax-payers dime. (His case is different of course. He DESERVES his disability checks. He hurt his back you see and can’t work.) He also thinks that Obama is a Marxist, Moslem Kenyan who was conspiring with the Illuminati, George Soros and ISIS to take over America. He loves Alex Jones and Michael Savage but thinks that Fox News is “too liberal”. He’s pretty much a brain-dead Teatard who long ago lost any common sense and critical thinking skills he may have had. I try to avoid him at all costs. The sad part is he votes.

      • grada3784

        Except for the disability, it sounds like my estranged brother.

      • Clive Johnson

        Wow…

        I actually don’t have any neighbors I know–we live in an apartment. Sorry to hear you don’t have a more hospitable environment.

        • Octoberfurst

          My neighbors are great—except for him. He’s a nice enough guy though. He’s batshit crazy and gullible as all hell but he’s always friendly. It’s just when he talks politics or world events that he becomes unbearable to listen to.

          • petewestcentral

            If you praised his knowledge he’d mow the lawn for you.

  • coram nobis

    He’s still confusing the Ghost of Christmas Future with the ghost of Hillary Clinton. Election’s over, Gomer. So’s the War on Christmas.

    In the real world of the future, everybody, if you’re thinking of traveling to Europe you’d better do it soon. EU’s upset at our entry controls and is considering requiring visas for all Americans.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/03/world/europe/eu-visas-parliament-united-states.html

  • PickyPecker
    • Max_1

      And of course the mouth is the crapshoot where everything shitty he says falls out of…

    • kaydenpat

      I’m sure the plumbing works fine for gay couples. Thanks for your concern though, Louie.

    • Misutaa Roboto

      Ah, of course. I’m lucky enough not to have seen the old “gay people don’t understand basic biology” trope in a while. It’s kind of funny in its implications about the person making the claim.

      This is the kind of gem you get when a really stupid person thinks they’re making a clever point. It’s right up there with “Well if evil-ution is real, how come there are still monkeys? Checkmate!”

    • JCF

      But where’s the asparagus?

    • petewestcentral

      Hey, somebody had to be Louie Gohmert and he took up that cross, bless his heart.

  • Lars Littlefield

    No, honey. You wouldn’t have ended up in prison. We’d have found you a nice, clean, and friendly home where you’d get the gentle therapy and effective medications that would help you be a mentally healthy, compassionate, understanding citizen.

  • Max_1

    America isn’t on the side of Human Rights under the Trump Administration.
    Rex Tillerson skips State Department’s annual announcement on human rights, alarming advocates
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/rex-tillerson-skips-state-departments-annual-announcement-on-human-rights-alarming-advocates/2017/03/03/7fbf8584-002d-11e7-8f41-ea6ed597e4ca_story.html?utm_term=.5ad202b69e2e

    • Right now, America does not actually have a functioning State Department. Most of the appointed positions are unfilled, a whole bunch of people were fired immediately, and most of the diplomatic posts remain empty as well. Tillerson doesn’t even have a senior staff yet and the high-level careerists are fleeing.

      • The_Wretched

        Or USDA or EPA.

  • anne marie in philly

    one can only WISH that were true…

  • Jamie_Johnson

    Funny, the rest of the country was sitting there on election night thinking “I’m safe if Hillary wins; If Trump wins, I’ll be deported/jailed/executed.” And here we are.

    Straw, meet man (and by ‘man’ I mean disgraceful excuse for a bag of mostly water).

  • vorpal

    In the US, you don’t need to be a Christian to be a member of a hate group.
    It sure helps, though.

  • Charlie

    This ass-hat shoulda been in a sanitarium four years ago – Xtian or not…

  • greenmanTN

    Louie? Honey? In a reasonable world you’d be in a sheltered workshop, because as a general rule elected officials are not supposed to drool on themselves. It’s unsightly.

    • Jay George

      You know it’s got to be somebody’s job to dress him and help him go to the bathroom.

  • PickyPecker

    OT: Sanity break? Happy Friday, good JMG folk.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRPDEwhgMAY

    • Jay George
      • PickyPecker

        LOL. sheep are so cute when they do that.

        • Jay George

          I resisted and only put the short clip. Gods know I’m capable of watching this stuff for hours. 😉

  • bkmn

    He is not capable of doing anything else, is he?

    • Remembering to breathe and not to look up when it rains uses up the rest of his sad, deficient neurons.

      • bkmn

        I wonder if his head rattles when he stands up after tying his shoes.

  • MarkBuster

    Something in me thinks that this is as close to a confession as he can get… What exactly does he think he might have been jailed for, which is now ok?

    • TampaDink

      It probably involves a dead girl or a live boy.

  • TuuxKabin

    No shit Sherlock. Of course you’d be in jail for a hate crime or two. So, yeah, you got that right. Bigot.

  • Pip

    No Mr Lying McLiarface you wouldn’t, but you’ll definitely be lucky to be alive in the next four years with the way Trump seems to want to play nuclear war with the world…

    • Jay George

      For some reason, Gohmert seems to think he has a seat in the bunker.

      • Pip

        I’m sure it’s, as everything else is with this admin, for sale to the highest “contributor” .

      • William

        His seat has been reassigned to a ficus tree.

        • Jay George

          LOL! Much more attractive and actually easier to care for. 😀

  • Richard B

    Some people who call themselves Christians do hateful controversial things – like discriminating against the LGBTQ.
    What is new is they are being called out for it, in some cases, penalized for it, and those hateful so called Christians don’t like it one bit and want to go back to the way it used to be.
    It ain’t gonna happen.
    Remember, stupid is what stupid does.

  • David Walker
    • Jay George

      That is a Russian speciality after all.

  • AdamTh

    I thought he was supposed to have been in prison 4 years ago because Obama won….

  • SunsetGay

    Don’t stop! Mr. Gohmert Pyle, you are doing great! Democrats appreciate it every single time you open your mouth and say something. Seriously. We both want one thing and that is for everyone to see you as the face of the GOP. Let us know how we can help.

  • The_Wretched

    Louie, stop imagining how a Hillary presidency would have been ‘worse’. No imagined alt-history makes the Bannon-Trump presidency acceptable. It’s also a form of comparing down – the “moral” refuge of immoral actors everywhere.

  • Gaymurcan

    Does Leavenworth even have a mental healthcare wing? Perhaps that nice SuperMax in Colorado will suffice.

    • William

      The Navy can install a nice padded cell at Gitmo.

  • Mrs Clinton is a church-going Methodist. Why would she want to outlaw Christianity?

    • coram nobis

      Because these loons project all of their fantasies on her. You’d think, with the supernatural and political powers they ascribe to her, she would have been President of the U.S. and Queen of the World by now. They’re still obsessed with her, as if she still is about to take power.

    • Talisman

      Unlike the dumpster, who “thinks” he is a Presbyterian, and can’t provide any evidence that he is a member of any church in New York City.

  • Jeff A

    Well, Killary is Methodist, who are very well-known for imprisoning and executing their enemies. /s

  • Hank
  • Tomcat

    I would say ignore these people, but that is what got America in as much trouble as it is in.

  • kaydenpat

    Does Gohmert know that Mrs. Clinton is herself a Christian? Does he know that the majority of citizens here are Christians? This fantasy of Christian persecution doesn’t wash in a country where the vast majority of politicians and power brokers are Christians. He needs to shut the hell up with all that whining.

    • McSwagg

      If Gohmert were to be arrested and tried for being a christain, he would be acquitted on the basis of a lack of evidence. He’s got nothing to worry about on that front.

      • kaydenpat

        True for him and many other prominent Christianists.

  • William

    Louie, Louie, whoa baby, you gotta go.

  • Patrick

    Right and you have no guns because Obama took them off you.

  • MonochromeMouse

    So you are more afraid of a Christian woman than an Evangelical Atheist man?

  • Hue-Man

    Under the heading: Christians like Louie are such wonderful people monsters

    A mass grave containing the remains of babies and children has been discovered at a former Catholic care home in Ireland where it has been alleged up to 800 died, government-appointed investigators said on Friday.

    Excavations at the site of the former Bon Secours Mother and Baby Home in Tuam, County Galway, have uncovered an underground structure divided into 20 chambers containing “significant quantities of human remains”, the judge-led mother and baby homes commission said.

    https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/mar/03/mass-grave-of-babies-and-children-found-at-tuam-orphanage-in-ireland

    • Robert Conner

      Caring for the innocents.

  • LovesIrony

    There are many christians that I love. They do not use their beliefs to hurt others. You are not that kind of christiian. I hate your kind fucker.

  • Bad Tom

    If you end up in jail, Louie, it won’t be for professing a Christian faith.

    I do wonder why you’re worried, though. Totaling up the time until the statue of limitations expires on something or other?

  • Silver Badger

    the real relief is now that the Republicans are in office he can feel safe being a pedophile. Perhaps a kkkristian pedophile but a pedophile still.

  • Natty Enquirer

    Still martyrbating and no second coming.

  • thatotherjean

    Loopy Louie is living proof that humans and howler monkeys are closely related:

    http://www.animalstown.com/animals/b/black-howler-monkey/black-howler-monkey-image-06.jpg

    • Canadian Observer

      I look forward to the day his lineage evolves into howler monkeys. A step up, mind you.

  • Henry Auvil

    Maybe Louie can replace Sessions as AG after he’s impeached.

  • FAEN

    Martyr Martyr Martyr

    Brainless Brainless Brainless

  • KarenAtFOH

    He says it like that would be a bad thing.

  • Wynter Marie Starr

    He should be glad they don’t put people in prison for being assholes.

    • Maggie 4NoH8

      or stoopid.

  • DuaneBidoux

    So let me get this straight. People who actually live the life of serving others that Jesus practiced and spoke of are out to get Christians?

    Oh, I got it. They’re worried Christians will be replaced by good people.

  • Friday

    So…. Gohmert is so outraged someone tallied up hate group threats, found that by far they are mostly Christian groups, and actually said it out loud, that he felt compelled to say he hated Hillary so much he was going to do something to get thrown in jail for and say it was because those hate-groups are ‘Christian-loving?’

  • Insane. Hillary was the only Christian at the top of a major party ticket this year. She actually goes to church, read the Bible and prays. Trump doesn’t go to church. He doesn’t even know the denomination of the church he claims to attend (Marble Collegiate is Dutch Reform, not Presbyterian). Two Corinthians? What a joke. So no, Clinton as not going to throw any Christians in jail. She is one. No one wants that actually. What would likely happen is that the far right Christians like Gohmert would continue to become more culturally irrelevant and ignored. But jailed? Why bother?

  • argeejay

    I’m all for Looey the Loon being sent to prison NOW.

  • Luther Kreiger

    To be fair there are probably a few hundred better reasons you should be in jail, dipshit.

  • Mark McGovern

    There are 1,500,000 state and federal inmates. In order to accommodate imprisioning all Christians in the USA, the country would need to create about 240,000,000 additional prison beds. Since virtually 70% of the taxable workforce would be imprisioned, there would be considerable budgetary challenges.

    • Canadian Observer

      On the other hand, would be really cheap source of labour for building things like walls…. and it would feed into their Martyr Complexes, everyone wins!

    • mad-dog

      OTOH, there’d be a lot less traffic. I wouldn’t have to go to work at 0530 to avoid it.

    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      I’m willing to pay higher taxes for the common good.

  • sword

    He would be in prison…but not for being a so-called Christian.
    I am waiting for 2020 when a Democratic President will preside over the largest
    incarceration of corrupt politicians in American history.

  • Mark

    4 years??? Louie – we would have you in the institution in 4 minutes.

  • NancyP

    Gohmert might be right. He might be caught with his fingers in the till at church, or defrauding fellow naively trusting churchgoers into buying pyramid schemes or junk bonds or the next island south of Key West. And that’s not mentioning all the possibilities for money laundering, tax evasion, vote buying, and so on. The likelihood of being prosecuted for federal crimes under a Trump admin is nil.

  • boatboy_srq

    “Christians are the biggest hate group threat In America”

    Well, if by “Christian” you mean “our parish of 200-odd souls who think the other 7 billion humans are all bound for Eternal Damnation and must be tortured and starved until they accept our Gun-Totin’ Capitalist Jeebus as theirnOne True Lord and Savior,” well, then, yes.

  • dafs

    Prison is not the place for Gohmert. We shouldn’t incarcerate the mentally ill.

  • Robert Conner

    WTF? The next full moon isn’t until the 12th!

  • fuzzybits
    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      What had Roger done that time? I’ve forgotten.

  • twb6yz

    Recount!

    You know, if Texas were to secede I’d finally support a wall along their northern border specifically to keep that idiot out.

  • Gianni

    This loon is really ’round the bend. Does he have a crystal ball that shows him a possible future? Not prison, please – the psych ward at someplace like Bellevue – and a lifetime commitment.

  • DaveMiller135

    It’s always good to begin by asking, “Would the world be a better place, if X happened?”

  • Itsatarp

    Didn’t these clowns say the same thing would happen when Obama was elected?
    Why, yes. Yes they did.
    http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2014/07/08/conservative-leaders-say-obama-will-soon-start-putting-christian-pastors-in-jail/

  • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

    No, Gomer, you’d be in jail for being a habitual oxygen thief. A life sentence with no possibility of parole.

    Plan on 2020.

  • Tom Mears

    Dammit, why didn’t more of you peoples vote for her. I would have voted twice more if I knew that was going to be part of the package.

    • Johnny Wyeknot

      Russia

  • justme

    But Louie..
    Real Christians , not the fake ones you represent aren’t Americas problem..
    You are…

    Just shut up and BE a US representative NOT a fanatic..

  • BudClark

    White KKKonservative KKKristianist KKKultists ARE the largest hate / terror group in the U.S.

    It’s just a shame that we can’t send Goober to prison for being shit-gibbon STUPID.

  • Barry William Teske

    Oh look!
    Another evangelical incitement of human rights abuses is hiding behind professed faux-religious belief.
    How can one tell?
    The bitter pill performances and lip syncing sucks.
    Fascisms last stand…HATE drag.

  • KQCA

    In prison? And the problem with that would be…….?

  • Dan Patterson

    Louis Goober is the stupidest man in Congress, and that’s saying something.

  • Sam D. Maloney

    I doubt they’d ever find evidence that he’s a Christian.

  • Heidiaricciardi

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj232d:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !mj232d:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash232ShopNetworkGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!mj232d:….,………

  • D. J.

    He should already be confined in a mental ward for being a crazy,
    racist, mean spirited, stupid, loud-mouthed asshole.

  • StillALiberal

    Poor little Louie, his dreams of martyrdom gone due to Drumpf’s election. You just know he these in his basement just in case things change…. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0feadbf910ba2068d89771e50e8419e9906dedd3da16208a15f23c63337b7958.jpg

  • JCF

    Won’t click Play on this for all the rubles in Drumpf’s bank account, but did the kinder, gentler, supposedly-more-rational/friend-of-Samantha-Bee version of Beck push back? At all?

  • andrew

    If only Hillary had won the Electoral College vote as well as the popular vote, we could have seen Gohmert behind bars. LOL.

  • Louie, Louie

    Maybe Louie can still go to prison for the child molestation he is alleged to have committed.

  • MBear

    Ummm…maybe a psycho wards, but im sure he’d think it was jailed for being christian

  • SnowFlake

    insane institutions are not prison…and how can hillary be blamed cause he is fucking nuts?

  • Tom Kidd

    Oh, Screwy Louie, we could NEVER get that lucky. *sigh!*

  • John Masters

    Goodness, he says that if it would be a bad thing.

  • RJ Bone

    No, you’d be in prison for child molestation, probably, Gomer. Or drug charges. Or having a wide stance in a bathroom.

    I could go on, but I’m sure you know allll the tunes from your side over the last thirty years.

    Nimrod.

  • Opinion Sousaphones

    Also, he would probably have to be Christian before he would be subject to such an arrest. I am not Christian, nor do I play one on TV, but I know enough about Christian beliefs to be fairly certain that he is not even remotely Christian. He reminds me of all the chin-less white supremacists one meets. They go on and on about their utterly fictional supremacy despite having more in common with the culls from an accidental dog litter. It is tiresome to listen to “Christians” go on and on about being persecuted. However, it is all projected shadow. Of course, there is persecution of a number of religious groups in various parts of the world, sometimes even state sponsored persecution, even of Christians. However, Louie and his lot have more in common with the persecutors than the persecuted.

  • Gregory In Seattle

    No, you would be in prison for being a corrupt fraud. Or is that your definition of being a Christian?

  • Kellysanderson

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj135d:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !mj135d:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash135DirectLoveGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!mj135d:….