John Oliver Shreds Snake Oil Salesman Alex Jones

USA Today reports:

What did John Oliver do with all of that free time while on hiatus? In addition to appearing on The Late Show to chat about Don Jr. with Stephen Colbert, it appears he also went on a shopping spree at the InfoWars’ online store.

In a NSFW segment Sunday, the Last Week Tonight host showed off his “Bill Clinton Rape Whistle,” available on the site for Alex Jones’ show, which Oliver said came with “a free ‘9-11 was an inside job bumper sticker.'” Oliver also taste-tested a drink mix called “Caveman True Paleo Formula” and refuted Jones’ claim that it tastes “better than Ovaltine.” According to the site, the product is made with bone broth and bee pollen.

“I know for a fact that Alex Jones did not enjoy drinking that glass of Caveman because I have got a glass of Caveman right here,” Oliver said raising a glass. “And I can confirm to you that it tastes exactly how you imagine a drink would taste that’s made from chocolate and domesticated bird corpses.”

  • Christopher
    • AtticusP

      Me, too!

      I sometimes find myself feeling badly for people who don’t understand English really well, because he speaks so rapidly that he can be hard for some people to follow.

      • ColdCountry

        Heck, I speak American English, but I frequently had a hard time understanding the Tenth Doctor. Captioning is a wonderful thing.

      • greenmanTN

        They do? I understand every word he says, and I sometimes have to turn on closed captioning for movies made in Alabama!

  • Treant
  • Anastasia Beaverhousen

    Alex Jones rant in 3… 2… 1….

  • bkmn
  • Sashineb
  • Uncle Mark

    After 6 weeks on the Alex Jones shake, I’m now redder and I have a belt !! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b8dabc58b69449684249eeeaba71a4a7deb470bd177ede3b6b25759da0500c14.jpg

    • Todd20036

      I think this was his attempt to show that without diet and exercise, all you need is steroids to make yourself look muscular.
      The only difference I see is he’s holding in his stomach a bit on the right, and yeah, he’s redder and is wearing a belt.

      Fun fact, he’s 43 (I think)

      He’s younger than I am by over 5 years.

      • GayOldLady

        So the bottom line is the drink makes you redder? And his behavior hints of roid rage, so there’s that. He used to be a workout freak and I’m thinking he’s stopped working out but continues to use steroids.

        • Todd20036

          If he was a workout freak, I never saw a photo of that.

          But given how much he’s prone to suggestions that validate his beliefs, I’m not surprised that he fell for some huckster who claimed you don’t need to work out to have a good body.

          I’m not saying anyone can look like a model in a magazine, but I can say that he’s done more detriment to his body with his drug use than anything else.

          And all the exercise in the world won’t undo the ravages of a drug habit.

          • GayOldLady

            This is what that clown looked like once upon a time. It looks like he dumped the workout and stayed with the steroids, imho! πŸ™‚

            http://www.modernlifesurvivalist.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/alexjonesrippedmusclesinfowarsyoung.jpg

          • Todd20036

            Not bad actually. He’s so vain he thinks he still looks ripped. But yeah, his face tells his story of drug use without saying a word.

            No one who looks like that at 23 should look like him at 43

            And no one ages naturally to that extent at 43

          • Tread

            He fits the profile of guys at the gym who believed his own bullshit without any of the facts to back it up.

    • Halou

      Now say which one has been put through photoshop.

    • TrueWords

      Holy crap he is 43, I will be 43 in November…well, I will stick to my eating plan and skip his…COMPLETELY…

      • Todd20036

        Yup. He looks like he’s 58, and an average 58 at best.

      • Lizard

        Wait, really? I genuinely thought he was a lot older than that.

    • Rolf

      His diet consists of inhaling sharply and squeezing his anal sphincter for all its worth for a few seconds while the camera clicks. Period.
      And I’m 61.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/66cd344f44078c76fb244c8a6d131c4b18557aa43fc7f030bc31be67a4407680.jpg

      • Paul Neuwirth

        Man…you are smokin’ HOT! You AND Satan can anally assault me any time!

      • Kruhn

        Wow! Mazel Tov, bud.

  • JoeMyGod
    • Uncle Mark

      For when you’re taint misbehavin’

    • iambu

      Doctors Without Borders!

    • Keroleen

      I thought I was gonna die laughing watching Jack McBrayer in a bad wig talk about taints with that explicit line drawing while hyping this product. I can’t help hoping someone with the funds bites, Doctors Without Borders is a brilliant cause!

    • Gerry Fisher

      Calling Warren Buffett!

  • Secure

    I finally got blocked by Breitbart.

  • TrueWords

    He is raking in money because some people are just that stupid and want to be entertained before informed…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/49e81f257f935144e82a21bd25798ccdcd2515eaa360e91cfd97792c9629f963.png

  • AJD

    Who could resist such quackery peddled by this cute yet eternally irritating twink?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d83eb889ad334ec6924fb836677136bf3bba8d31f238c8167330afaf1e043361.jpg

    • Treant

      “Shut up and take my [semen]!” –Futurama

  • Octavio

    Four words: chocolate flavored chicken juice.
    Mmmmmmmm . . . nom. nom, nom, nom.

  • Richard B

    The best thing for America to do to excessively overpaid Alex Jones is to do exactly what has happened to excessively overpaid Rush Limbaugh – just stop listening to his show.
    It is powerful and simple. What happens next is just desserts to the people that enabled these awful people to those folks who should have never become infamous in the first place. Most of Limbaugh’s syndicated stations are either financially crippled or going bankrupt for being committed to pay for his lousy show .

    • Kruhn

      Thing is the fucking idiots buy his shit.

  • glass
  • JWC

    Why does the media pander tothis idiot Look what happened with thae last idiot you pandered to he is your prezzy

  • ColdCountry

    You’d almost think he was trying to set some kind of record for being sued by the most people at once. Wonder if Jones will take the bait?

  • I noticed the “Proprietary blend” on the Living Defense bottle, which basically means “we aren’t going to tell you what’s in this crap”.

  • David Walker

    Anyone else having to sign in every single fucking time you return to disqus? Also, it won’t let me log in through Google or Facebook. It can’t be AdBlock, can it? I’ve had that since disqus started inserting those between comment ads and I always got through. I recently added flash for YouTube. Ideas?

    • ohbear1957

      Have you tried cleaning your screen with a taint-wipe? πŸ™‚

    • RoFaWh

      Disqus needs to have cookies enabled.

  • greenmanTN

    I really LOVE John Oliver. Being on HBO he can afford to be truly funny and SAVAGE as hell against these people. It was a brilliant idea to hire Jones’ own “medical expert” to promote John’s own brand of taint wipes.

  • greenmanTN

    That Newtown conspiracy business was truly fucking disgusting. He really wasn’t on my radar before then, but he promoted the idea there were ZERO dead children, it was all actors, just a FAKE NEWS story to “take away our guns!”

    Imagine your first or second grade child was murdered by a gunman, then you are inundated with phone calls, emails, whatever, blasting you for taking part in this shameless deception?

    At the time of the Newtown shooting I saw a heart-warming human interest TV interview with an elderly man who saw children crying at the end of his driveway and went out to see what was wrong. He called their parents and watched over them until they were picked up.

    I saw another interview with the same man just a few months later. He had to change the phone number (landline) he’d had for decades, his email and social media accounts because he was being inundated by hate mail from people who believe it was a hoax, thanks to people like Alex Jones.

    A gunman in a pizza parlor who is “investigating” the pedophile ring they’re running in the basement, accordinging to people like Alex Jones. It might be a joke but it ain’t fucking funny!

    I don’t know, but this seems awfully close to “shouting ‘fire’ in a crowded theater,” the only difference being that the Internet “theater” is far larger than any physical theater might be.