A Message From Alleged Senate Candidate Kid Rock

Twitchy is thrilled:

We still don’t know if Kid Rock is running for Senate in Michigan or not, but he’s doing all the right things to reach out to voters. Like this greeting to his fans over on Twitter. When will we see him campaign with President Trump? And notice the male-to-female ratio on the plane? That means Mr. Rock is the GOP candidate best positioned to take on Dems and their phony #WarOnWomen nonsense.

  • bkmn
    • BJORN RAGNVALDR

      But not soon enough o be of any use to its citizens or historic allies.

  • Blake J Butler

    Never senate material RITCHIE.

  • Michael R

    Please … run with the Noog .

  • TK
    • bsinps

      Can’t blame though.

      • Teresarjordon

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    • Jeffg166

      The dominant life form in the universe is probable artificial intelligence. It would be so far beyond us we may not be able to comprehend it. From it’s point of view we might look like goldfish. Pretty to look at but how would it talk to a goldfish.

  • Boreal
  • Lumpy Gaga

    Oh can it with the “We can only blame ourselves” bullshit.

    I can only vote once (as I’m not a Trump supporter or a Russian hacker), and I can’t write the checks necessary to take on the Koch Brothers, Club for Growth, et al.

    Democracy can survive laziness, but not a deep economic divide where the people at the top are willing to Go There to take it all.

    • Nowhereman

      I agree. Corporations are not people, and money is not speech. We need to fix that.

    • TampaZeke

      The problem is, we’re ALL getting what Trump supporters deserve!

    • Publius

      People really are dumb. People voted for the Nazis. This is democracy, and it sucks sometimes.

      • Kruhn

        Plus they are willing to vote for ersatz working-class populists born with silver spoons stuffed in their entitled mouths and silk nappies gracing their overindilged asses and probably not having worked an honest day in their lives.

  • ByronK

    Great campaign slogan!

  • Chucktech

    So eloquent, so dignified and statesman-like.

  • Todd20036

    Kid Rock:
    More intelligent than a box of rocks.

    • Butch

      Why don’t you like boxes of rocks?

      • Todd20036

        They voted for Trump

    • Lumpy Gaga

      [citation needed]

    • Beagle

      But less intelligent than a box of hair.

  • Butch

    Trafalgar Group, which is a Republican outfit, actually has him leading Stabenow, but there are almost no undecideds in the poll and it’s based on a July 2017 screen of likely voters for November 2018, so it’s obviously just a shock poll. Still, we’re doomed.
    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B4lhKxf9pMitRFpUd3lHV21ZdGs/view

    • Rambie

      AZ is still a red state will take push to motivate the blues to vote

  • HZ81

    Every day, I await Jamie Lannister coming to put me out of my misery. And maybe doing a few other things to me, but mostly murder.

    Please, Jamie. Come soon.

  • Harveyrabbit
  • Jonathan Smith
  • Jonathan Smith
  • Jonathan Smith
  • Sam_Handwich
    • Treant

      I see whore, bore, and snore.

      • Todd20036

        Kid Rock may be the biggest whore on that plane

        • Lizard

          “May”?

        • FAEN

          Without a doubt.

    • Lizard

      “Groupies” would be my first guess, but maybe I’m just a cynic.

    • PickyPecker

      The Solid Gold Dancers! Been wondering where they’ve been. /s
      https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-e8dYGRVF4H8/VrbITwWyy8I/AAAAAAAAEas/78qa3HcGRPQ/s1600/dancers.gif

    • Todd20036

      I’d guess prostitutes who may never have been on a plane before in their lives.

      • Lizard

        I’ve been told that Kid Rock actually has fans. I’m guessing those are groupies.

        • Todd20036

          He had one fun album back in the 80s, but frankly, I’m just amazed at how much Trump opened the door for candidates who have absolutely no civics knowledge or experience.

          • Lizard

            I’m trying not to think about it too much. I can’t spend all my time weeping under my covers in the fetal position.

        • Uncle Mark

          Do they get paid much to be his fans…or are they just paid in bleach?

      • Paula

        I always dress like that when I am flying, don’t you.

        • Todd20036

          It would help one get through security faster, actually.

    • Dagoril

      Oh I thought it was Ivanka.

    • Christopher

      I see there was a sale on Skanks!

      I knew Kid Rock was a cheap imitation of a celebrity, but DAYUM!

      That dude is so awful he gives White Trash a bad name! And I was born poor white trash.

      • David Walker

        A sale on Skanks? Oh, my god. I think I love you…and I know I’m stealing that.

      • DonnaLee

        He was not born poor at all, that’s like gangster rappers talking about their street cred, and they were from nice neighborhoods.

    • Kruhn

      Isn’t this supposed to be the family values crowd? No offense to women who provide sexual pleasure for a living, but these women look like cheap hookers and groupies. Have they no shame? Have they no Christian sense of decency? We queers are immoral for loving our same gender. Our trans friends are denied the right to serve this country with honor because of their wish to express and live their life as their true gender identity. Yet this son of a bitch can live the life of a libertine and present himself as vir populus.

      Please my trans brothers and sisters correct me if I’m wrong as I want to man the ramparts next to you in honor and fellowship and fight these troglodytes.

  • Lumpy Gaga

    So yeah, here’s the problem with brown upholstery…

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    I would like to comment or offer a quip or two but….where to begin?

  • Publius

    Make America British Again!

  • boobert

    I wouldn’t think those women are major supporters. More like paid bimbos.

    • AmeriCanadian

      Groupies. No pay necessary.

  • Treant

    While I appreciate a candidate who includes sex workers in his platform, this wasn’t quite what I had in mind.

    • Todd20036

      If he isn’t a total hypocrite (like most republicans), he may actually be pro-LBGT

      • IamSmartypants

        Nope. He throws the word “fag” around on a regular basis. From a 2015 Rolling Stone interview…

        Rock even admitted he has a membership at golfer Jack Nicklaus’ private Bear’s Club, near Palm Beach, Florida, saying, “If you told me five years ago I’d have to take my hat off and tuck my shirt in, I’d have slapped the taste out of your mouth. Now I’m like, ‘Look at me, hair slicked back, shirt tucked in.’ I’m like, ‘What a fag!’”

        • Todd20036

          Yup. Hypocrite. Figures.

        • Todd20036

          And yeah, he’s a viable candidate. He’s not a viable senator, but he’s a viable candidate.

      • Oh, Parker

        Michigan is full of KKK and other assorted deplorables. I’m sure they will be out in large numbers to support him.

  • AtticusP

    Well, that’s a relief!

    I was so afraid that he would lower the level of discourse in the Senate.

    • Todd20036

      Among the republicans, this actually raises it a little.

  • June Gordon

    On the upside, nobody had to share a cabin on Delta with a pack of middle age prostitutes.

    • Mikey

      or those blonde bimbos.

  • BJORN RAGNVALDR
  • Boy Elvis

    When is Insane Clown Posse going to run for office, just to make this black comedy complete?

  • JWC

    Definetly caters to the idiot redneck factor Oh wait,, that’s already in Washington

  • jimbo65

    You just know there’s a bunch of unsavory scandals in this asshat’s past waiting to get exposed. Somebody has to know where the bodies are buried.

    • Lazycrockett

      If you are considering voting for Kid Rock you want the dead bodies.

    • Adam King

      The idiots who would vote for him like nothing better than unsavory scandals. That’s entertainment!

      • FAEN

        Jinx.

        • Adam King

          Bread and butter.

    • FAEN

      The deplorables voting for the asshat view unsavory scandals as a massive plus.

      • jimbo65

        True, true. I keep forgetting we’re living in the upside down now.

        • FAEN

          I wish we weren’t.

      • pch1013

        Yes, because IOKIYAR.

      • DreadPikathulhu

        Unsavory scandals mean he’s either one of them or who they inspire to be.

  • FAEN

    He’s certainly playing to his potential voters.

  • bkmn

    O/T – just saw that Rep John Delaney of MD is stepping down to prepare to run for POTUS. Anyone from Maryland have any impressions of the guy?

    • Kruhn

      Never heard of him, but his district runs through the DC suburbs of Rockville, the I-270 Corridor, the City of Frederick, and the Maryland panhandle. Another truly gerrymandered district.

  • OdieDenCO

    name recognition does not qualify one for political office.

    • AmeriCanadian

      Especially when he can not legally be listed on the ballot as anyone other than Robert Ritchie. Tell me how many of his followers know who the f*ck that is?

      EDIT: I should add that is based on today’s laws. There’s still time for the Repubes in charge to change that. I’m guessing they will.

  • Nic Peterson

    I always get this clown mixed up with Fred Durst.

  • BJORN RAGNVALDR

    A few years back or more he came out with a song that reached a broader audience that included my parents. After seeing a performance my Mother said she had not given Kid Rock any thought but turns out she really liked him. (He looks like about a half dozen of my Appalachian foothills cousins). I reminded her of this recently. She responded “black tar heroine is bad, mkay?”

    • Beagle

      I think I know the song. A duet with Sheryl Crow?
      If so, he had the advantage of working with someone that has talent.

  • Bob Conti

    “‘The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves.’ Goodnight, and good luck.”

    • Karl Dubhe

      Ain’t that the truth.

      Maybe that’s why the Reich wingnuts made such a fuss over that particular play.

  • Slim Compersion

    James Dobson, October 2018:
    “It is my understanding Mr. Rock is a baby Christian.”

    • The_Wretched

      He said the same about Trump.

  • Dagoril

    He’s kinda hot, in a “meth-chic, rough trade, trailer trashy” kinda way.

  • MikeBx2

    Securing the Evangelical vote. Falwell, Jr was probably taking the picture.

  • ColdCountry

    “And notice the male-to-female ratio on the plane? That means Mr. Rock is
    the GOP candidate best positioned to take on Dems and their phony
    #WarOnWomen nonsense.”

    Um…. I don’t think those are the kinds of “jobs” that most women are looking for. Not to mention that the kind of objectification that is evident there is one of the things that women complain about. Can these guys really be that dense, or are they “just kidding?”

  • pch1013

    But Michelle O’s bare arms are the most obscene gross disgusting things EVER.

    • KnownDonorDad

      And worse, Clinton’s emails.

  • TampaZeke

    I can see the campaign slogan now, “KID ROCK: the Maturity of a Kid with the Intelligence of a Rock!”

    That seems to really sell with Republicans these days.

    • Ken M

      My evil stereotype side…it is Michigan we’re talking about here.

  • Rex

    It’s time voters take their responsibility seriously.
    Like, voting “let’s give him a chance” and “we don’t need career politicians” gets us screwed. Trump pumped up his crowds with catch phrases and empty promises with nothing plan full behind them and now look at where we’re at. Any thinking person knew Mexico wasn’t paying for a wall, that healthcare is easy, or only he alone can fix it. Americans are taking for granted that the USA will be the powerhouse county and their lives won’t change. It’s time for people to wake up.

    • Vista-Cruiser

      Pretty soon the USA will have all of the influence of a single county…

  • Princess Lardass

    What the fuck is happening to my country?

    • AmeriCanadian

      The “kids” have grown up and are entering government.

    • Lumpy Gaga

      Civil War almost over. Look for the Taboola soon.

    • Vista-Cruiser

      Democrats no longer bother to vote in elections.

  • Pat
  • Ernest Endevor

    I have no idea who this person is. Is it a wrestler?

    • BockMcMillan

      Yes!

    • Princess Lardass

      No, it’s an ever increasing threat to American democracy.

    • KnownDonorDad
      • Ernest Endevor

        What did I ever do to you?

    • The_Wretched

      A musician with delusions of adequacy.

  • TampaDink

    This is the first step in securing the vote of the “religious right”, next he just needs to admit to grabbing women by the pussy or better yet, demonstrate doing so. Those jebus freaks adore that kind of christinanity.

  • Ninja0980

    The religious right will be along to justify this any minute now.

  • andrew

    I think people should refrain from giving this guy publicity. Just a short time ago the media gave another asshole tons of free publicity which helped catapult him into the White House and we are now suffering the consequences.

  • olandp

    So Senatorial.

  • Jmdintpa

    i fear republicans take more seats in 2018. democrat voter turnout was down in the last election even though there was so much to lose. here in florida im sure the dem. candidate for gov. will be horrid, will not excite the base. will not be able to turn out the vote needed in the mid term to win.

    • AmeriCanadian

      Yep. And then it will be all over.

  • KnownDonorDad
    • Treant

      “Shit.”

  • Halou

    What’s next; appointing Snoop Dogg as ambassador to Bongo-Bongo Land Africa?

  • abbafan65

    Sadly, he’ll most likely win here in Michi-tuck-issippi. Once proud blue, now reprehensible red. 🙁

  • Christopher

    How the FUCK is this guy still a thing?!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fc03ea93391f58d6087afd4c24e2c2767840233ae32ad2ea64b3db6861223e0d.jpg

    Seriously? WTF! HOW??? And more importantly, WHY???

  • This Big Every Day!

    Michigippi! Hurray! We will finally have a senator who loves the Confederate flag!

  • ‘Til Tuesday

    What’s up with Michigan anyway? Kid Rock AND Ted Nugent?