One Million Views For Catholic Vote

Poster by Scott Wooledge. His review at Memeographs:

The auteurs at Catholic Vote have created an instant classic Christian cinematic masterpiece to rival Kirk Cameron’s Saving Christmas. Not since National Organization for Marriage’s “Gathering Storm” of 2008 have we seen delusional hyperbole, paranoia and self-pity lifted to such delirious heights. Like an episode of The Bachelor or a Lindsey Lohan court appearance, Not Alone is both terrifying and impossible to look away from. This important piece of filmmaking will surely inspire countless imitators, but Not Alone is so earnest in its own clueless, privileged insensitivity that parody may be superfluous (see Poe’s Law). Still, I look forward to seeing what influence this motion picture exerts on Stephen Colbert and the creative staff at The Daily Show, Funny or Die and Saturday Night Live.

Catholic Vote is very upset about the reactions.

  • Parque_Hundido

    This is perhaps the best, most thoughtful gift Catholic Vote could have given us. Entitled, whining, self-important and, most importantly, preposterous, this video is all we need to show the world why we are right and why those who oppose us deserve only laughter and scorn.

    Thanks Catholic Vote, and happy Independence Day!

  • JesterRedPanda

    This truly is an example of poe’s law. The first time I saw it, I had to do a bit of a double take to make sure it wasn’t itself a parody. The sheer lack of self awareness is staggering, lol.

  • bkmn

    Geez Tommy, you set yourself up for this. Grow a pair.

    • Justin

      A pair of working legs?

  • John B.

    Just curious, are these real people or are they paid actors? Because their side seems to have an awful lot of trouble finding people who will actually let them use their names and their images, at least judging by how much NOM and some of the other anti-gay groups rely on stock photos (as hilariously documented by Jeremy Hooper, over and over).

    • jomicur

      Paid actors. But they’re certainly not the kind of actors who get paid very much.

    • Chucktech

      I’m not sure Catholic Vote could find that many young people…

    • brian

      Paid actors, one of whom is actually gay. But hey, it’s a check, everyone has to eat.

  • TominDC

    Over 1 million views and only 30k thumbs down!

    What they forget to also mention, is that they got well under 3k thumbs up votes.

    • DaddyRay

      I had to go over and add my thumbs down vote

      • LonelyLiberal

        I added my own “bugger off” as well.

  • Jeff Matchan

    Waiting for the KKK version of this video. I’m sure they would also like to feel they aren’t alone in their bigotry.

    • crewman

      Well there was this one, which is pretty similar:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1UxAH9FMY0

      • hudson11

        White girl: and I feel a little black….

        Black girl: Yes girl, and I feel white.

        WG: no, it doesnt; work that way.

        Hilarious and spot on

        • hudson11

          BTW, it Black Girl’s makeup supposed to look like Angelina Jolie’s bad makeup from awhile back? even funnier.

      • DesertSun59

        “It’s okay, I’m trans-racial.”

        Priceless.

  • Curieux Bleu

    12X as many downvotes as upvotes! Never again will Catholic Vote send out a video that is not disabled for likes and dislikes!

    The Catholic Hierarchy are very authoritarian, but this time their little henchman, TP tee hee, slipped up big time. For such an egregious mistake he must self flagelate repeatedly with his Opus Dei whip

    … although he will probably require help to punish himself … aww … that’s kinda sad in a way. But yeah, bring on the flagellation!

    • bkmn

      But that would require them to use some common sense AND learn how to use the internets.

    • RNegron

      He probably enjoys flagellation, so the proper punishment is to not flagellate. Mmm, This is getting me horny, I need to go fellate my husband.

    • David Walker

      Since he has gay friends, perhaps they could help with the flagellation…in gratitude for his condescending love.

    • Justin

      Tommy should be wearing a cilice…. ooops. He wouldn’t feel it much these days, would he?

  • Blake Jordan

    Definitely one of the most offensive videos I have ever suffered through!!!

    • Hypatia

      I was raised Catholic and have some fond–and other not so happy–memories. I think I can see where the speakers are coming from. Much of the Catholic ethic on sex/marriage holds out a platonic like symbolism. They will say, for example, that barriers like condoms render “the act” unnatural. They say the complementarity of men and women (both in their genitals and in their roles/psychogy) symbolizes the union of Christ and his Church. Much of what they say sounds elegant and coherent in the abstract. ( Maybe that’s because so many of the ideas come from either celibates or people who are trying to abstain from sex but wind up having furtive guilty encounters–instead of relationships.)

      The speakers appear rather young. They may not have had the life experience to realize that actual relationships/marriages cannot always conform to abstract ideals/symbols. I could well have appeared in this video when I was in my early to mid 20’s; now I’m 64 and have learned that most people are just trying to do their best. (Being involved with–now three–marriages of my gay friends–has helped in my learning process.) Even the speakers are probably doing the best they can–and reasoned discussion (hold the vitriol) plus time could help them evolve.

      • Todd Allis

        I think the people in the video are actors.

        • John P.

          Of course they are. Not very good ones though.

          • Fyva Prold

            Not very straight, too.

          • Fyva Prold

            I guess it was Peter Thomas himself who ran casting for the video.

        • bkmn

          They couldn’t afford animators.

          • skeptical_inquirer

            Now I want to see the South Korean news animators make a parody of this.

      • DesertSun59

        Flowery, made up language doesn’t negate the sheer ridiculousness of the Worldwide Pedophile Organization™ that is the Catholic Church.

      • clarknt67

        Assume they are paid actors until proven otherwise.

    • jomicur

      I showed the video to a straight friend of mine, and he immediately described it as “the most cynical exercise since the Reichstag fire.” At first I thought he was a bit over the top, but the more I think about it the more I think he was spot on.

  • Christopher

    EXCELLENT!

  • Elaygee

    Like a Nuremberg Rally docudrama, hate lite. The international criminal conspiracy to molest children and protect the molesters, AKA Roman Catholic Church, has no morals, just grasping to hold on to another generation to feed their coffers to buy gold and jewels for their leaders silly hats, frilly dresses and gaudy jewelry.

    • GreatLakeSailor

      And the incense. Won’t someone pleeeeeease think of the incense!!1!

      Q: Wasn’t there a pope named incense?
      A: Yes. Incense1 + 12 sequels.

  • Stev84

    Rick Perry’s Strong ad got 800.000 down votes. They have a long way to go.

    • Todd20036

      Yeah but Rick was running for president. Seriously

  • The Professor

    There is a storm gathering. And I am afraid…. ROTFLMAO

    • Snarkaholic

      A storm? I thought all that rumbling on the horizon was Piyush Jindal, bitching because he fiiiiinally had to comply.
      (But, yes, that storm commercial was hilarious(!)

  • bryan

    Grace and dignity in defeat are clearly not catholic values.

    • Snarkaholic

      Maybe that’s because they don’t have much experience with defeat. For centuries they’ve successfully used fear and guilt to manipulate the people, and now, thanks to tools like the internet, they’re finally being exposed as the frauds they are…and they don’t know how to respond/deal with it.
      Boo-frickety-hoo.

    • GreatLakeSailor

      And at the end of the day, it wasn’t even a defeat. If we stick to the language of war or contests it was a draw: I won’t tell you which consenting adult you can and which consenting adult you can not marry and you afford me the same courtesy.

      • Chucktech

        I’m sure Catholic Vote takes little solace in this “draw.”

        • GreatLakeSailor

          I suspect you are right.

  • Octoberfurst

    I watched the video and didn’t know whether to be angry or just laugh at them. Yes anti-gay bigots are just SO persecuted in this country. Why can’t they freely express their hate without people condemning them? Boo hoo hoo, my heart bleeds for them!
    What’s next? The KKK putting up a video that says, ” I have Black friends who I love dearly. But I just think that they should use different water fountains, go to different schools and not live anywhere near me. Why oh why can’t I express how I feel without being persecuted? Where is the tolerance for different opinions?” >breaks down into tears<
    Yeah, it's that pathetic.

  • Adam Schmidt

    I love how they say that they have gay “friends” and that they “love” them. Really… love is many things but one of them is unconditional. If you’re saying “I love you but…” then you don’t really love them. And these folks are essentially going on to say “I love you but you’re going to hell you dirty sinner.” So however misguided these people are, their worst delusion is that they have gay friends that they love.

    • joe ho

      remember during the inquisition heretics were tortured and killed out of chirstian “love.” the church claimed that by suffering in this life, the victims would have to suffer less in the next.

      when christians use the word “love” run the other way. in their orwellian world it often means the opposite.

    • Leo Tallant

      As Matt Baume said, they don’t have Gay friends, they just know some Gay people…..

      • RoFaWh

        Mere acquaintances, not friends. Friends are the people you can depend on when the chips are down and you call for help.

      • bkmn

        Knowing your hairdresser is gay is not the same as being their friend.

    • RLK2

      They love them only out of pity is what I surmise from this piece of garbage. Actually, they need to be pitied (well not!) for the sad fucks they are (sorry for the language, but this stuff needs to stop already and we need to hit back).

  • j.martindale
  • Ninja0980

    You want proof of how tone deaf their side is, this video is it.
    The most laughable part of this video is how they talk about how they “care” for their LGBT friends, then go on to justify why it’s okay to discriminate against them.
    With “friends” like that, who needs enemies?

    • RoFaWh

      That attitude has a strong whiff of condescending paternalism in it. “I know what’s right for you better than you do.” That might be okay with little kids, but certainly not with grown men and women.

      Does this come as a surprise?? No, not at all. The RCC is, after all, the original Big Brother, watching everything you did and sticking its nose into things that are none of its business. Like who can marry whom in the eyes of the law.

      • rusty57

        “…a strong whiff of condescending paternalism…”
        The very core of the Abrahmaic faiths.

    • GreatLakeSailor

      ChristianistLuv closely parallels abusive spouse “Love”.

      “Why do you make me hurt you!! I only do this because I Luv you!!!!”

      Compare to

      “I ChristianistLuv my gay friends…really. I just want to make sure they know they’re going to hell, will get kicked out of hospital when their beloved needs them the most. I want to make sure their boss has the freedom to fire them and their landlord has the freedom to kick them out of their rental, the government allowed to charge them higher taxes than other couples. Why do they choose to make me do this to them…I ChristianistLuv them. Honest.”

    • DesertSun59

      The funny part of this is that none of us need their ‘care’. The hubris of them believing they need to do so is just sheer stupidity.

    • Cuberly

      They lurve their geh friends and feel so horribly scared to let it be known that they’d work tirelessly to deprive them of their rights. They be sCeerd! Fer RealZ!

  • 2guysnamedjoe

    Thanks for the reminder. I went back to it on YouTube because I forgot to downvote when I watched it the first time.

    • GreatLakeSailor

      Thanks for the reminder!

  • Rebecca Gardner

    They are getting it in their own comments section and on twitter, so I had to join in.

    • Rebecca Gardner

      ugh! I hate Disqus this morning. Here is my tweet…

      • People4Humanity

        Nice work, Becca!

      • Scott

        Might I suggest you post this in the comment sections of Catholic Vote and Youtube?

  • Emma Duncan

    I love and care for all my gay friends, and denying them their rights as American citizens, hurts me more then it hurts them.

    • Octavio

      Thanks, Emma. But I’m pretty sure denying us our rights hurts us a bunch.

      • John30013

        I think (I hope, based on her comment history) that Emma’s post was snark.

        • Octavio

          Emma’s a good person. Snark or no snark, she’s on our side. Still, denying us our rights hurts a bunch+.

    • 2patricius2

      Sounds like the abusive parent who beats their children and says “this hurts me more than it hurts you.”

  • sdnative1958

    Catholic Person: “I have to tell you, we’ve been friends since high school, but I really think marriage should only be between a man and a woman.”

    Gay/Lesbian Person: “Does that mean we can’t be friends anymore?”

    Catholic Person: “Gee, I hope not – I can’t imagine you not in my life anymore, we’ve had some great times together.”

    Gay/Lesbian Person: “Well, me neither – wanna go grab some beers and talk about our crappy jobs?”

    Catholic Person: “That’d be great!”

    Basically the relationship I have with a straight friend of mine. What’s so hard?

    • BlueberriesForMe

      You: “So I’m getting married but I won’t invite you to my wedding because I know that you think marriage should only be between a man and woman. Also, I won’t ever introduce you to my wife/husband because I know that you think marriage should only be between a man and a woman. Also, I won’t ever have you over to my house again because my wife/husband might be there and I know that you think marriage should only be between a man and a woman. Also, I won’t tell you what I think about Catholics and the Catholic Church because you might take it personally.”

      Get the picture? What a GOOD friend you must be.

      • Reality.Bites

        Also, I won’t spit on you if you’re on fire, lest any spit molecules from my husband still be in my mouth.

      • sdnative1958

        Our friendship is deeper than that, he knows I don’t believe in any of that Catholic clap-trap and he and his wife have hung out with my husband and I several times.

        • BlueberriesForMe

          So why do you think he wanted to tell you what his opinion of what he believes marriage is? Because you’re such close and long time friends you can tell each other how you really feel about anything and neither of you are going to take offense because your friendship “transcends all that”?

        • BlueberriesForMe

          Another take: your husband is black. You are white. Your long time friend who has met your husband several times tells you: “I don’t think blacks and whites should be together.” But you’re still friends, right? It would be one thing if your friend thought this and kept it to themselves. It’s another thing to state what you believe and say “But we’re still friends, right?”. I know : your friendship still “transcends” that belief of your friend.
          Really?

        • Robincho

          There’s a word for what you two have, but that word is not “friendship.”

        • jomicur

          “deeper”? I think the word you want is “shallower”.

        • brian

          I tend to think otherwise regarding who I consider friends but, hey, if that second class friendship works for you, who am I to judge? Have a happy 4th.

    • Ben in Oakland

      If someone told me, as a married gay man, that he thinks my relationship with my husband should not be allowed, or that my life, love, family, children, faith, freedom, and assets just are not as important as his, I would think that he doesn’t know, respect, or value me in the slightest.

      If you can think so, more power to you. But for myself, paraphrasing Arnold in torch song trilogy: all I ask from the people in my life is love and respect. And if you can’t give that to me, you have no business being in my life.

      • sdnative1958

        He hasn’t thrown me out of his life because I’m gay, and I haven’t thrown him out of my life because he’s Catholic. It is what it is, our friendship transcends the differences.

        • NZArtist

          Your being gay doesn’t make you hate what catholics do. His being catholic makes him hate what gays do.
          His hating what defines you should be what makes you find a better class of friend.

    • mari

      I couldn’t accept that. I accept the attitude that my Catholic relations have toward my straight marriage outside the faith: it’s a marriage. (They have exactly the same attitude toward my cousin and his husband, except they’re relieved my cousin could finally get legally married. The two of them are getting older and have health problems, and they need those legal protections. They’ve been treated as married by my family for decades.)

      It’s matter of distinguishing between religious and civil marriage. My wedding wasn’t solemnized in their Church, but that’s my decision. When you join a Church you accept the rules of that Church for yourself, not for the rest of the world. And you grant everyone else that right.

      Of course, they have to ignore a chunk of doctrine to get that far, but many Catholics these days don’t so much accept the rules as ignore them while they hope the institution changes. I think that’s an absurd hope, but I’m a tolerant being, and that’s their decision.

  • JustSayin’

    One of the posters at the link got it dead on….it does seem like this should be a parody ad against republican and teabagger whining…maybe we should co-op the whine with a bunch of parodies.

    • Snarkaholic

      With liberal use of the word “Duggar” in voiceovers.

  • The CV link has comments open! Just sayin’ ; ) Mine’s waiting for mod.

    • Clive Johnson

      Thanks for the tip. Mine’s waiting too.

  • goofy_joe

    It still makes me laugh when people put something out there that’s so hateful, and then get all upset and indignant when the reaction is negative. What exactly did you think we would say?

    • David Walker

      I think we were supposed to say, “Oh, now I see. Yes, you’re definitely so right and I am humbled and grateful that you still think of me as you friend. God’s goodness knows no bounds.”

      Yeah, right. Like that’ll happen.

      • BlueberriesForMe

        “Thanks for showing us all the Light. I can’t wait to start giving all my money again to your “cause”.

    • clarknt67

      They see the near universal condemnation as more evidence they must save the Earth from the corrupting force of the gay agenda. I mean, obviously they are right and the 99% of America who reacted in shock, disgust and ridicule is just brainwashed by the evil gays.

  • 2patricius2

    I had a boss one time whose behavior had the whole workplace upset and depressed. When I spoke with her about it, she blamed the supervisors under her. It dawned on me that her defenses were so high she could not even see the effect she was having, much less address it.

    I think maybe CV is like that boss. They post a video of several Catholics who say they are afraid to say they are against marriage equality (though they clothe their position by saying they are for only man/woman marriage). Then when numerous responders point out that they are not the victims and point out the many ways the marriages of those they oppose have been victimized, they claim that those who mock them are the real victimizers. They seem to not have the slightest clue.

    And if those who speak in the video are Catholic people talking about their real feelings, and if they thought they were going to get a mountain of applauds for their “courage” in speaking out, they now are faced with a mountain of scorn, instead, for their self-pitying whines. Of course, if those who appear in the video are actors, they got the acclaim they may have been longing for. And they might well land roles in some satirical and camp movies.

  • Roger

    I couldn´t resist to leave then some toughtful advise in the comments, but I doubt they will aprove it:
    “You guys STILL don´t realize the gargantuan embarassment that you bring on to yourselves, the catholics, and religion in general with this video? really?
    Except for a handful of sttuborn bigots, this piece is the worst mockery you could have done to religion and – as you said – it´s gone viral, but believe me, this is NOT a good thing for you. NOM has done this before with their gathering storm” video thats been laughed at for nearly a decade. Now you guys decided to put it on record the most staggering catholic bigotry for everyone to see and hijacking the language of the very groups you spent centuries trying to demean and deny rights. And still you can´t see the ridiculousness of the situation? Go ahead then. Publicize this monument to sheer stupidity some more and wait for the results. If someone is mocking religion and God, be sure: its not your critics. Buy a mirror.”

  • perversatile

    Get off the cross~ we need the wood!

  • Steven Leahy

    LOL well at least this ridiculous, embarrassing-for-them video spawned some hilarious parodies for our entertainment, so some good came of it 🙂

  • Geezus Christ

    Sadly, they truly are not alone. There are thousands of haters out there just like them.

  • i actually went to Facebook.com/catholicvote to try to remind these people of the harsh reality: having these beliefs won’t make their own kids straight. that their LGBT kids, terrified in their closets, are hearing their words and their prejudice and these people are damaging them. they al pretty much insist that “their kids won’t be gay” – when i asked what they’d do if they found out a kid of theirs WAS gay, they went on and on about “they’d encourage celibacy and still love the child, but not the sin”

    RIGHT. CATHOLICS touting celibacy. because that’s worked out OH SO GREAT for so many priests, right?

    it’s astounding – they don’t care. they don’t care that the ideology they espouse will indeed harm the young gay people in their own lives, in their own families. and this isn’t about marriage – WHY are they upset that gay couples are marrying? they think gays who “act on being gay” go to Hell. the same way they think JEWS go to hell.

    one woman kept going on and on about “bestiality will be next!” i said to her, “Well, your husband is the one that married a pig”
    that comment got me banned from Facebook for a week. for real.

    they can promote hate, they can promote prejudice, they can slander our entire community and promote an ideology that destroys families and LIVES, and i can’t call a bigot a pig.

    oh well.

    • Well, in spite of getting banned for a week ya done good, son. Ya done good!

    • BlueberriesForMe

      Re: “i can’t call a bigot a pig”. Maybe not Facebook but on here you sure can :=). Thanks for your effort.

    • bkmn

      For them it is not about being right, it is about being superior and better than everyone else.

  • Clive Johnson

    The gist of the video: “My mind is in thrall to an irrational prejudice, one that I don’t have the critical thinking capacity to think through. But because I’ve committed my life to a metaphysical error, which I believe without evidence, I’m good to go. And, oh yes. When I’m not allowed to persecute you because of my religious beliefs, I’m the one being persecuted.”

  • rusty57

    These are paid actors right? No one is really this clueless.

    • Yes, they are all actors. And sadly one of the actors is gay, so he basically took blood money.

      • RLK2

        Which one is it? He should be reminded he is a traitor.

        • I don’t know which is the traitor. Maybe with some google work you’ll be able to find out.

          • KQCA

            His name should be noted. No doubt he’ll include this video in his CV.

    • Stev84

      Someone had to write the script

    • Steven Leahy

      Whatever they were paid, it was too much!

  • Religious sects have the right to make any rule they wish for their members. No matter what anyone not in their sect thinks of those rules. Their religion their rules. And thats cool.

    Whats not cool is when they try to make those not in their sect follow their rules. Believe what you wish, but keep it in house, m’kay?

  • dear thomas peters over at Catholicvote, you don’t have a leg to stand on.

    • Stev84

      Technically he still has legs. But they don’t work anymore.

  • DesertSun59

    It’s quite hilarious how these zealots are digging their own grave. They go on record as being totally clueless.

    People who are JOINING the institution of marriage are not OPPOSING it. Those who say we are destroying or opposing it are members of a National Opposite Day Coalition™, and are proving their cluelessness.

  • Michael Rush

    i tried to leave this comment on their website, but it’s ” awaiting moderation “…

    instead of calling this ” media intolerance ” just admit you made a world class stupid video , and tell the actors you paid to do it they will not be getting oscars

    http://www.catholicvote.org/secular-media-reveals-intolerance-slams-cvs-viral-pro-marriage-video/

  • Necessitas

    The video can be reduced to one still image:

  • bkmn

    And here I thought Catholic Vote stood for one man – one child marriage….no wait, that’s not right, they don’t stop at one child.

  • LADY MABELINE

    “Sad to be all alone in the world”

  • Jude Newton

    I finally had a chance to view this video and – AYFKM? Seriously,what group of morons sat around the conference table and thought this was a great idea? The real sad part about this insufferable piece of shit is that now that they hit 1M views they will get ad money from youtube.

    • KQCA

      The same ones who sat around a conference table figuring out how to keep raping children while preoccupying their parents with a red herring.

  • Cuberly

    The original video had to have made Gallagher, Brown, LiMandri, Donohue & Roback-Morse dripping wet with excitement. It nails all the manufactured aggrievement they’ve been selling smack on it’s head. It’s the perfect marketing ruse. It’s everything they’ve been building up to.

    They’re their own worst enemy.

    http://media1.giphy.com/media/KZZXBweLSCikg/giphy.gif

  • Snarkaholic

    Stealing cars again, eh?
    If you were making that kind of money, you wouldn’t be on here, trying to scam us.
    Go bury your head deep inside a filthy litter box…where it obviously belongs.

  • KQCA

    Just a little reminder to put this in perspective.I volunteer as a facilitator for a support group of male survivors of sexual assault. Many of our members are victims of Catholic priests. The Catholic church told them that they were to blame and it was their problem to get over it. Contrary to what the Catholic hierarchy would have you believe, the sex scandal is NOT in the past. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jW-S9Ddws4w

  • Nichole

    I have a question Kathleen. Does this actually work? Not the snake oil bullshit scam that you’re running here but the act of going into random blogs making random copy paste spam over and over again. I mean, it can’t truly be worth it but you guys just keep doing it.

  • agcons

    Fuck off. Flagged.