Tag Archives: loony tunes

SOUTH CAROLINA: Motion To Intervene Claims Gay Marriage Would Force Man To Stop Worshipping The Lord

From local loony tune Don Boyd’s typos and misspellings-laden motion to intervene in the challenge to South Carolina’s ban on same-sex marriage: DON BOYD, MUSICIAN AND PSALMIST, Anointed and Assigned as a Watchmen of the souls of the people errantly calling themselves lesbian and gay WOULD PURSUE DISMISSAL of what is in essence and in truth a RELIGIOUS matter couched …

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Exorcism Of The Day

“The demons Jezebel and Mammon have worked together to torment Monica’s ancestors with witchcraft for 10 generations. Now, Monica’s whole family is about to get free!”

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How To Become An End Times Co-Prophet

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Pat Robertson: God Might Destroy Houston Because Of Mayor Annise Parker

Brian Tashman writes at Right Wing Watch: Last week, Pat Robertson reacted to a case in Houston in which a group of pastors were subpoenaed as part of the discovery process in a lawsuit over the city’s nondiscrimination ordinance by calling gay rights advocates “terrorists.” The subpoenas have since been withdrawn, but that has done nothing to rein in Robertson, …

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KANSAS: Crackpot Unruhs Try Again, File Amicus Brief Against Marriage Ban Repeal

The crackpot Kansas couple who were smacked down in their attempt to intervene in the Kansas marriage case are trying again, this time via an amicus brief which again claims that evil gays are trying to literally steal their marriage. Read the full brief from Phillip and Sandra Unruh at Equality Case Files.

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Harlem Hate Pastor: You Will Get Ebola If You Visit Starbucks Because Sodomites

(Tipped by JMG reader John)

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Danny Devito Is The Anti-Christ

Here’s the latest from the Third Eagle Of The Apocalypse and Co-Prophet Of The End Times. Not only is Danny Devito the anti-Christ, a red couch seen in the latest One Direction video “symbolizes the second horseman of the apocalypse.” Red furniture is from Satan.

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Jennifer LeClaire: Atheists On Twitter Are Trying To Stir Up Witches Against Me

“This may never happen to you, but I got a good laugh this week when some unbeliever – or perhaps someone who has been hurt deeply by the church – launched a miniature Twitter campaign trying to stir up witches against me. Needless to say, it didn’t work. When demonic activity is rising in a city, a sensitive Christian will …

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Rick Wiles: God Will Destroy America And The Survivors Will Be Slaves Of Sodomites

PREVIOUSLY ON JMG: Earlier this year Pastor Wiles declared that ebola can solve “America’s problems with gays and atheists.” Last year he declared that MSNBC viewers are “demon-possessed fans of the anti-Christ.” Also last year he declared that gay rights will bring about global nuclear war. And then there was that time he declared that God sent a plague of …

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KANSAS: Straight Couple Seeks To Intervene In Marriage Case Because Gays Literally Want To Steal Their Marriage

Phillip W. Unruh and Sandra L. Unruh today filed a motion to intervene in the ACLU’s marriage equality case in Kansas. As laid out in multiple points in their brief, the Unruhs declare that legalization of same-sex marriage would constitute the literal theft of their straight Christian marriage, a property which is guaranteed to belong only to them per the …

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Klayman: Obama Must Be Taken Alive

“I do not advocate violence, and I want Obama to be taken alive to be deported and pay for his inadequacies under the rule of law. But he must be forced from office as soon as possible, before all is lost. We the people simply cannot, and should not, take it anymore. These are not ordinary times. The nation is …

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Pastor Ron Baity: God Will Destroy USA With Super-Ebola Over Gay Marriage

Jeremy Hooper writes at Good As You: Pastor Ron Baity, the winner of the Family Research Council’s 2012 “Watchmen Award” for pastors, is a longtime marriage activist in the state of North Carolina. He’s led many major rallies at which all of the activists and lawmakers who have tried to keep the Tar Heel state discriminatory have shown up to …

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Larry Klayman Files Homeland Security Petition To Deport President Obama

Loony tunes teabagger Larry Klayman has filed a Homeland Security petition demanding the deportation of President Obama as an undocumented immigrant. And you though he couldn’t out-crazy himself. Klayman’s deportation request – mailed to three Department of Homeland Security officials – asks for an investigation and hearing into Obama’s citizenship status. If authorities ignore the request, Klayman intends to file …

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Rodney Howard-Brown: Obama Is Building Gas Chambers & Concentration Camps

Brian Tashman writes at Right Wing Watch: Televangelist Rodney Howard-Browne — who just two months ago led a Religious Right gathering featuring several GOP congressmen — claimed yesterday that the United States government is currently building concentration camps and gas chambers and preparing to institute martial law. Howard-Browne claimed that the U.S. government is now building concentration camps and gas …

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Christian Post: Madonna Is Working To Prepare The World For Satan

“Madonna doesn’t have an ego problem; she has a sin problem. And it’s getting worse. Unrepentant and hardened from sin, no amount of make-up or photo-shop can conceal the evil in her eyes. Ensnaring millions into a web of destruction, Madonna is preparing fans for a specific event. Using biblical discernment concerning the times in which we live, and her …

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World Net Daily Writer: American Gay Activists Are Like The Terrorists Of ISIS

“What I’d like to concentrate on at the moment is that the majority of the unfortunates in Iraq who are facing this genocide are Christians. Indeed, the majority of those being horribly persecuted by Muslims in nations across the Middle East and parts of Africa are Christians. In America, we are seeing a different methodology being used to disenfranchise Christians, …

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Democrats Mock Senate Candidate Joni Ernst For “Agenda 21” Conspiracy Theory

Joni Ernst, you may recall, rocketed to crackpot fame with campaign ads that trumpeted her ability to castrate a pig and her promise to literally shoot down Obamacare. Now that she’s won the Iowa GOP nomination for the US Senate, Democrats are mocking her belief in the loony tunes Agenda 21 conspiracy theory. Over at Wonkette, Doktor Zoom explains Agenda …

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Franklin Graham: Pastors Must Be Willing To Have Their Heads Chopped Off In The Battle Against LGBT Rights

“Are we going to be cowards because we’re afraid? Could we get our heads chopped off? We could, maybe one day. So what? Chop it off!” This happened yesterday at the Family Research Council’s Watchmen On The Walls convention.

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Cindy Jacobs: God Told Me He’s Going To Expose Corruption In Maryland

Cindy Jacobs is on God’s speed dial and since they are BFFs, he totally redirects hurricanes, thwarts terrorist attacks, and shrinks tumors at her request. And because he follows her on Facebook, God had special insider information for Cindy for when she spoke in Baltimore this weekend. Bonus points if you can make it through the full two shrieking minutes. …

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Orly Taitz: As California AG I’ll Prosecute Officials Who Claim Obama Is American

Batshit crazy birther queen Orly Taitz has filed to run for California Attorney General. If elected she promises to “prosecute state officials who ignored all evidence brought by law enforcement and experts, showing Obama to possess citizenship of Indonesia, fabricated Selective Service certificate, fabricated birth certificate and a CT Social Security number.” She’s not the only looney tune in the …

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