Tag Archives: batshittery

Exorcism Of The Day

“The demons Jezebel and Mammon have worked together to torment Monica’s ancestors with witchcraft for 10 generations. Now, Monica’s whole family is about to get free!”

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How To Become An End Times Co-Prophet

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Danny Devito Is The Anti-Christ

Here’s the latest from the Third Eagle Of The Apocalypse and Co-Prophet Of The End Times. Not only is Danny Devito the anti-Christ, a red couch seen in the latest One Direction video “symbolizes the second horseman of the apocalypse.” Red furniture is from Satan.

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KANSAS: “Gays Want To Steal Our Marriage” Nutcases Shot Down By Court

Remember the crackpot Kansas couple that says evil gays are attempting to literally steal their marriage?  A federal court has told them to suck it. A federal judge has rejected an attempt by a heterosexual couple to intervene in a lawsuit challenging the state’s gay marriage ban.The ruling reads that Phillip and Sandra Unruh, of Harper, have no legal right …

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Eugene Delgaudio: Gays Want To Make It Legal To Rape And Murder Young Boys

“My health is suffering under the strain of fighting the radical Homosexual Lobby with limited help. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep and I am sick with worry. Many nights I stay up and worry — worry about my family, worry about Public Advocate’s future, worry about the future of the American Family and morality. I’m expected to expand programs …

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Pastor Kenneth Copeland Slays Demon Virus Ebola By Speaking In Tongues

Speaking in tongues always cracks me up. Start at 13:00.

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From Chief Of Staff For Sen. Ted Cruz

Chief of staff for Sen. Ted Cruz immediately deleted the above tweet after half of Twitter called him insane. Some the responses were posted tonight by the Boston Globe. (Tipped by JMG reader Sam)

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Pat Robertson: Christians Can Raise The Dead But Just Don’t Use That Power

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Rep. Louis Gohmert: Gay Massages Put The Military In Danger Of Terrorism

“I’ve had people say, ‘Hey, you know, there’s nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks.’ Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it’s a different kind of fighting, it’s a different kind …

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KANSAS: Straight Couple Seeks To Intervene In Marriage Case Because Gays Literally Want To Steal Their Marriage

Phillip W. Unruh and Sandra L. Unruh today filed a motion to intervene in the ACLU’s marriage equality case in Kansas. As laid out in multiple points in their brief, the Unruhs declare that legalization of same-sex marriage would constitute the literal theft of their straight Christian marriage, a property which is guaranteed to belong only to them per the …

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E.W. Jackson Launches Petition: Legalize Anti-Gay Discrimination Nationwide

Via press release today from Christian Newswire: Bishop E.W. Jackson, Harvard educated Attorney, Minister and last year’s Virginia Republican Nominee for Lt. Governor has launched a national movement to protect Christians from “growing hostility, discrimination and anti-Christian bigotry.” As a first step, today Jackson officially launched the UNITY PETITION FOR RELIGIOUS AND CIVIL RIGHTS. This effort is inspired by increasing …

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Today In Crazy People

“What is the purpose of all this disease, lack of protection and border security??? It appears to be potentially the ‘full meal deal’ for Obama and his goals. 1) Establish over the next few years mindless, dependent and UN American foreign voters and supporters for Obama and his goals. 2) Punish America for her achievements by riddling her with diseases …

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More From Dr. Bryan Fischer, Virologist

Damn those apes and their poppers!

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Robert Oscar Lopez: The Human Rights Campaign Is Like The Khmer Rouge

“They’re after your kids, plain and simple; all their other issues are mere window dressing. They have convinced themselves that gays are a tribe unto themselves, so their consuming goal is to populate the tribe so they don’t disappear. Parenthood is their great white whale. They want to have children to love them and call them Mom and Dad. They …

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Crazy Eyes: Schlafly Ended The Cold War

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Exorcism Of The Day

Clip recap: “Energodar, Ukraine is home to the largest nuclear plant in Europe. It will also be remembered as the place where a drug addict name Anton with violent demons came the Christ and was delivered. Watch as seven men struggle to restrain Anton. This exorcism is translated into Russian.” Acting! In Russian!

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World Net Daily: God Wants President Obama To Nuke The Middle East

“Let us finally face it and stop pussyfooting around. We are in a religious war! In the end, it is either them or us. If we intend to have any chance of survival, it is also time that we face reality. Either we kill these radical Muslim ISIS cockroaches – all of them – before they spread like cancer and …

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Robert Oscar Lopez To Fifth Circuit: Stop Gay Marriage Because I Was A Prostitute

Homocon horcrux Robert Oscar Lopez has filed a deranged amicus brief with the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals in support of the ban on same-sex marriage in Texas. According to Lopez’ brief, gay parents escape punishment for abusing their children because child welfare authorities fear appearing bigoted. The brief goes on to accuse Frontiers writer Karen Ocamb of “issuing an …

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Rodney Howard-Brown: Obama Is Building Gas Chambers & Concentration Camps

Brian Tashman writes at Right Wing Watch: Televangelist Rodney Howard-Browne — who just two months ago led a Religious Right gathering featuring several GOP congressmen — claimed yesterday that the United States government is currently building concentration camps and gas chambers and preparing to institute martial law. Howard-Browne claimed that the U.S. government is now building concentration camps and gas …

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Ted Cruz: Democrats Want To Outlaw SNL

Via Deadline: A new proposal for campaign finance reform would make Saturday Night Live’s political skits illegal, Republican Sen. Ted Cruz has warned. The Senate is debating a bill that would add a constitutional amendment allowing Congress reverse a 2010 Supreme Court decision and restore limits on corporate campaign spending. Republicans say the bill, proposed by Dems, is an attack …

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