Idiocracy

The Washington Post reports: Secretary of State Marco Rubio is set to arrive in Panama on Saturday with a lofty assignment: Retake the Panama Canal, the U.S.-built waterway that President Donald Trump laments should have never been relinquished to the Central American country 25 years ago. The audacious demand, which Panamanian President José Raúl Mulino called “impossible” and regional leaders …

Politico reports: Agriculture Department employees have been ordered to delete landing pages discussing climate change across agency websites and document climate change references for further review, according to an internal email obtained by POLITICO. The directive from USDA’s office of communications, whose authenticity was validated by three people, could affect information across dozens of programs including climate-smart agriculture initiatives, USDA …

The Huffington Post reports: The Department of Transportation has released a memo ordering that programs supported or assisted by the agency prioritize funding projects for communities that have above-average marriage and birth rates. Newly-confirmed Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy buried the oddly specific requirement by describing the Wednesday memo as focused on economic growth, rather than population growth. According to the …

CNBC reports: Google said Monday it will change the name of the Gulf of Mexico to “Gulf of America” in Google Maps after the Trump administration updates its “official government sources.” The company also said it will start using the name “Mount McKinley” for the mountain in Alaska currently called Denali. Last week, President Donald Trump signed executive actions that …

The New Jersey Advance reports: The phone at Aqua Blu Kitchen & Cocktails has been ringing off the hook for days. Its email inbox has been flooded with hundreds of passionate messages. The restaurant has been a popular fixture of the Toms River scene for the past 13 years. But attention like this? Never. “It’s a nightmare,” owner Cathy Varriale …

CBS News reports: A local elected official in Montgomery County, Pennsylvania, has resigned after coming under fire for a video shared on social media. Laura Smith resigned from the Towamencin Township Board of Supervisors after a video in which she mimicked a gesture made by Elon Musk. In a statement announcing her resignation, she said the video she posted “has …

ProPublica reports: The man tapped by President Donald Trump to be second-in-command of the federal agency that protects the public from environmental dangers is a lawyer who has represented companies accused of harming people and the environment through pollution. David Fotouhi, a partner in the global law firm Gibson Dunn, played a key part in rolling back climate regulations and …

“It is my honor to announce Jon Voight, Mel Gibson, and Sylvester Stallone, to be Special Ambassadors to a great but very troubled place, Hollywood, California. They will serve as Special Envoys to me for the purpose of bringing Hollywood, which has lost much business over the last four years to Foreign Countries, BACK—BIGGER, BETTER, AND STRONGER THAN EVER BEFORE! …

Ars Technica reports: A British judge ruled against a man who wants to excavate a landfill where he says a hard drive with access to thousands of bitcoins was mistakenly dumped over 11 years ago. Since 2013, James Howells has been hoping to recover a laptop hard drive that he says contains the private key for cryptocurrency which he says …

The New York Post reports: An Arizona tattoo artist is under fire for inking a 9-year-old girl with an American flag — but he insists he actually helped her out and doesn’t support kids getting tats. The co-owner of Black Onyx Empire Tattoo — who goes by Sosa — shared an Instagram post saying the girl rolled into his Yuma …

“You know what? Me, personally, I’m already at the Capitol. I’m already yelling on my horn, I’ve already got my flag up in the air. Get ready! Here we go! M-A-G-A! M-A-G-A-ay! Look at these roads, man. Look at these roads. God has cleared a path for us today. “Say it louder! M-A-G-A-ay! Come on! Shout it out loud! Whoa! …

“Matt Gaetz, let me tell you something. Highlighter is not for you, stop highlighting the center of your face. It makes your eyes very small and it gives you the glow – not the glow you think it gives you. Look at the flawlessness in my skin – no highlighter needed. “You’re a Florida man, I’m in Florida right now. …

The Daily Beast reports: Sen. Chuck Grassley, 91, was sworn in as Senate president pro tempore on Friday, making him third in line to the presidency. The position goes to the longest-serving senator of the majority party. The Iowa Republican previously served as president pro tempore from 2019 to 2021, before Democrats took control of the Senate. Even after months …

People Magazine reports: Jocelyn Wildenstein has died at the age of 84. The Swiss socialite was known for both her extensive and extreme plastic surgeries and her high-profile 1999 divorce from a billionaire art dealer. Jocelyn’s partner, Lloyd Klein, told AFP that she died of a pulmonary embolism in a Parisian palace on Tuesday. Jocelyn was born Jocelyne Périsset in …

Portland’s CBS affiliate reports: Two Portland men searching for Sasquatch and missing since early Christmas morning were found dead in the Gifford Pinchot National Forest – likely from exposure and being ill-prepared, officials said. The search for the men, 59 and 37, began around 1 a.m. December 25, the Skamania County Sheriff’s Office posted on their Facebook page. Authorities said …

“There is no development there. I mean, Denmark helped to fund some airports in Greenland when the Chinese government tried to fund and construct them several years ago, but there’s no road between any town in Greenland. “There’s zero infrastructure, basically, and it’s a gigantic area. So the idea that little Denmark, which can’t even defend its own territory … …

Raw Story reports: In replies to a post criticizing Musk from Trump ally Laura Loomer, some Trump supporters said that they were still owed money after they took part in his petition drive scheme that promised participants $47 for each successful referral to sign the petition. “I am waiting 80 days for payment from his AmericaPAC,” wrote Cheré Woltz Oliver …

Marianne Williamson writes on her Substack: This year’s election of a DNC Chair feels different than in past years. Before now, the party had faced defeats to be sure. But our playbook still basically worked. The waters were turbulent at times, but our ship was steady. This year, the party faces a more critical problem than we have ever faced …

The New York Post reports: “Did they take Santa hats with them before they launched,” one commenter blithely asked on X. “Or did they knit them while they are there?” Another commenter chimed in: “These the same guys who went up for an 8-day mission in June?” A third commenter joked “The Gilligan’s Island tune is playing.” Still others seemed …

Roll Call reports: Lingering ill will among House Republicans after another messy spending fight could complicate Speaker Mike Johnson’s bid to retain the House gavel — and potentially the Jan. 6 formalizing of Donald Trump’s election victory. As president of the Senate, Vice President Kamala Harris would be the presiding officer during a joint session of Congress that day to …