Idiocracy

USDA Site Lists “Wakanda” As Free Trade Partner

Slate reports: President Trump’s trade war got more—or less—surreal this week when it was discovered the Trump administration listed Wakanda as a free trade partner on a tool created by the Department of Agriculture to track tariffs on nations signed on to a free trade agreement. Wakanda, of course, is not a real country but a fictional one in the …

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McConnell Is Pitching Pompeo On 2024 WH Bid

From the conservative Washington Examiner: When Mitch McConnell pitches Mike Pompeo on running for the Senate in 2020, a periodic occurrence, the majority leader does not fail to mention that the chamber is a great steppingstone should the secretary of state harbor higher aspirations. Fearing former Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach could win the Republican nomination to succeed retiring …

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Trump Bows To Turkey On 1915 Armenia Genocide After Erdogan Threat To So Classify Native American Deaths

France 24 reports: President Donald Trump’s administration said Tuesday it does not consider the mass killings of Armenians in 1915 to be genocide, seeking to placate Turkey which was angered that the US Congress recognized it as such. “The position of the administration has not changed” after the votes by Congress, State Department spokeswoman Morgan Ortagus said in a terse …

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Trump Sells “We’re Saying Merry Xmas Again” Stickers

From Trump’s “official” online store: Only for President Trump’s BEST Supporters! To celebrate Christmas, President Trump wants his BEST supporters to get first access to Official Trump Campaign merchandise! Don’t miss out on these LIMITED-EDITION Christmas Bumper Stickers! Please contribute at least $10 by MIDNIGHT TONIGHT and we’ll send you your 2 pack of stickers immediately! Also available are MAGA …

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MMA Fighter Hailed By Trump For Offering To Beat Up Democrats Gets Jaw Broken In Championship Bout

MMA Fighting reports: Colby Covington will go home without the UFC welterweight title and instead spent his Saturday night at the hospital receiving treatment following his fifth round TKO loss to Kamaru Usman. Between the third and fourth rounds, Covington went to his corner and told his coaches that he believed he suffered a broken jaw. A replay seemed to …

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Budget Deficit Spikes $342B In First Two FY20 Months

Fox Business reports: The U.S. government deficit spiked 12 percent to $342 billion during the first two months of fiscal year 2020, according to data from the Congressional Budget Office. The CBO says the U.S. budget deficit will average $1.2 trillion a year from 2020 to 2029, amounting to 4.4 percent to 4.8 percent of gross domestic product. The federal …

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West Virginia Prison Guard Trainees Make Nazi Salute

The Charleston Gazette-Mail reports: A number of West Virginia Division of Corrections and Rehabilitation employees are suspended and West Virginia Gov. Jim Justice is calling for some terminations after a photo surfaced that shows more than 30 participants in a basic training class doing a Nazi salute. The cabinet secretary for the West Virginia Department of Military Affairs and Public …

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VIRAL VIDEO: World Leaders Gossip About Trump

The Guardian reports: Boris Johnson, Justin Trudeau and Emmanuel Macron appear to be joking about Donald Trump at the opening of this week’s NATO summit in London along with other world leaders. In the video, Johnson asks Macron: ‘Is that why you were late’ before Trudeau interjects: ‘He was late because he takes a 40-minute press conference off the top.’ …

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WH Furious Over Critiques Of Melania’s Xmas Decor

The Hill reports: The White House is slamming what it’s calling the media’s “annual holiday tradition” of criticizing Melania Trump. “It has become an annual holiday tradition for the media to attack all that the first lady does,” White House press secretary Stephanie Grisham said Tuesday, according to Fox News’ Brian Flood. “If this was a Democratic administration, I suspect …

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Book: Melania Thinks Roger Stone Leaked Nude Photos

The Guardian reports: Melania Trump suspects Roger Stone, a longtime ally and adviser to Donald Trump, of being behind the release of nude photos from her modelling past, a new book claims. In the book, Free, Melania, CNN correspondent Kate Bennett also writes that the first lady “still refuses to believe” her husband played a role in the release. At …

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Trump Restores Trade Tariffs On Brazil And Argentina

Axios reports: President Trump tweeted Monday that he will restore steel and aluminum tariffs against Brazil and Argentina due to their currency devaluations. Trump’s tweets show that he is not afraid to open a potential new front in his ongoing global trade war even as the 2020 presidential election approaches — and also touched on his antagonism with the Federal …

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53% Of Republicans Say Trump Is Better Than Lincoln

Newsweek reports: 53% of Republicans believe that Donald Trump is a better president than Abraham Lincoln, according to a new poll. The Economist and YouGov published results of its latest polling on U.S. politics this week. One poll gauged Trump’s favorability versus Lincoln, who was the U.S. president between 1861 and 1865 and who steered America through the Civil War …

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Trump Campaign: No Evidence This Photo Is Doctored

Business Insider reports: The Trump campaign trolled The Washington Post for reporting that a picture President Donald Trump shared of his head pasted onto the body of fictional boxing champion Rocky Balboa had been doctored. “Trump tweets doctored photo of his head on Sylvester Stallone’s body, unclear why,” the Post tweeted on Wednesday, after Donald Trump shared the Rocky image …

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Many GOP Groups Are Bulk-Buying Junior’s Book

The New York Times reports: At least nine Republican organizations, G.O.P. candidates or advocacy groups are selling “Triggered” or promoting Mr. Trump’s book tour, according to emails obtained by The New York Times, interviews and disclosures filed with the Federal Election Commission. The breadth of the Republican establishment’s effort behind Mr. Trump is striking for a noncandidate whose most significant …

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Ousted Papa John’s Founder Denounces Papa John’s After Eating “Over 40 Pizzas In 30 Days” [VIDEO]

Business Insider reports: Papa John’s former CEO slammed the pizza chain he founded in an interview with local news. “I’ve had over 40 pizzas in the last 30 days,” John Schnatter told WDRB News. “And it’s not the same pizza. It’s not the same product. It just doesn’t tastes as good.” Schnatter resigned as Papa John’s chairman in 2018, after …

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White House Misgenders Military Working Dog

The New York Daily News reports: A White House official on Monday said that Conan, the military working dog that helped take down ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi in northwest Syria in October, was a female. However, a few hours later, a White House official said the dog was in fact a male, adding to a debate that developed after …

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Trump Advisor Calls For Privatizing Social Security

“This is an idea that I don’t know if the Trump administration is going to embrace, but it’s something, I think, for middle class people would be one of the best ways for every American to own stock in America. So, instead — the idea would be, you know, rather than having to send your 10% of your paycheck into …

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Elon Musk To Face Civil Trial Over “Pedo Guy” Tweet

CNBC reports: Tesla CEO Elon Musk is headed to court to answer a defamation lawsuit filed by a British rescue diver he called a “pedo guy.” U.S. District Judge Stephen Wilson in Los Angeles denied Musk’s request to throw out the case, according to court documents made public Tuesday. Wilson ordered the jury trial to begin Dec. 3. Musk lawyers …

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This Is South Dakota’s Actual Anti-Meth Slogan

The Argus Leader reports: Gov. Kristi Noem has a message for South Dakota: “Meth. We’re On It.” Noem launched her new anti-meth campaign on Monday to bring awareness to the meth epidemic in South Dakota that will include a new TV ad, billboards, posters and website. The campaign’s motto features the phrase, “Meth. We’re on it,” over an outline of …

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DALLAS: Straight Pride Rally Draws Two Attendees

Three if you count the Proud Boy who showed up late. The Advocate reports: A Straight Pride event at Dallas City Hall plaza attracted three supporters on Saturday. The march was hosted by the anti-LGBTQ group Protecting Our Next Generations (PONG). On its Facebook, the group promised the event would include discussions of abortion (“it is murder”), marriage values (“one …

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