Idiocracy

Columbia, South Carolina’s NBC News affiliate reports: A woman hoarding gas caught on fire following a car accident Thursday night in Pickens County, according to Chief Deputy Chad Brooks. A deputy in a marked patrol unit, saw a Pontiac G6 traveling on Jameson Road in Pickens and determined that the vehicle was displaying a South Carolina license plate that had …

Tampa’s ABC News affiliate reports: According to a spokesperson for Citrus County Fire Rescue, the driver had just filled up gas cans at the Texaco Food Mart near the scene. Firefighters found four 5-gallon containers filled with gasoline in the back of the Hummer. Firefighters say one person was injured but refused to be transported for treatment, against medical advice. …

Oakland’s Fox News affiliate reports: A 25-year-old man was arrested after he was seen riding in the back seat of a Tesla with no one in the driver’s seat. Param Sharma was arrested Monday evening by California Highway Patrol on two counts of reckless driving and disobeying a peace officer. Sharma remained unflinching in his attitude about sitting in the …

Law & Crime reports: A defendant showed up to a court’s Zoom stream with a deeply unfortunate screenname. No, his name was not really “Buttfucker 3000.” This happened in an arraignment hearing posted to YouTube on Tuesday from the court of Judge Jeffrey Middleton in St. Joseph County, Michigan. There was a brief pause before the defendant realized the judge …

“I didn’t even vote. Out here in California, it’s like, why vote for a Republican president? It’s just not going to work. I mean, it’s overwhelming. “It was voting day and I thought the only thing out here in California that I worry about, which affects people, is the propositions that were out there. And I didn’t see any propositions …

“Racing has a problem, Bob Baffert is not the problem. Bob Baffert is not stupid. I haven’t heard anything officially. They haven’t told me anything. “I know when Churchill Downs came out with that statement, that was pretty harsh. And I think they had to just—with all the noise going on, we live in a different world now. “This America …

Gizmodo reports: Andrew Brenner, a state senator in Ohio, is getting some heat for driving while participating in a Zoom call earlier this week. The Ohio Senate is currently taking up a bill that would create additional penalties for distracted driving and a local newspaper, the Columbus Dispatch, pointed out the irony of the situation. But local media aren’t discussing …

The New York Daily News reports: Fox News correspondent and law school graduate Geraldo Rivera is accusing Facebook of denying Donald Trump his constitutional rights. Twitter spoke freely about the mustached pundit’s understanding of the First Amendment. “Facebook is full of s–t,” Rivera tweeted after the social media platform decided to uphold its suspension of the 45th president’s account following …

“It sounds like a big challenge, because if we take all of the carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere, what are trees going to turn into oxygen? “That’s the Biden administration’s climate czar John Kerry, speaking at the White House’s climate summit, virtually. “Those comments came after the administration announced that it would seek a 50 to 52% reduction in …

Fox News reports: Reality television star Caitlyn Jenner announced plans Friday to run for governor of California. “I’m in! California is worth fighting for,” Jenner tweeted. Jenner, a Republican, has filed paperwork to seek the governorship and has hired several well-known Republican operatives to guide her burgeoning campaign. She’s hoping to unseat Democratic Gov. Gavin Newsom, who faces an all-but-certain …

The New Hampshire Union-Leader reports: An explosion that rattled homes within a 20-mile radius Tuesday night is being blamed on a gender reveal celebration at a Kingston quarry that police say involved more than a pound of Tannerite and blue chalk. Many residents in communities across southern New Hampshire and northern Massachusetts reported hearing the explosion just after 7 p.m. …

“So, does the vaccine — and there are a couple of them, but do they work or don’t they work? It’s okay, you can tell us. Well, the CEO of Pfizer came out and seemed to suggest today that actually, the dose that Pfizer is administering doesn’t work. “The CEO of Pfizer has announced that two doses probably aren’t enough. …

Mediaite reports: Texas Republican Senator John Cornyn performed a spectacular “Gotcha!” fail when he tried to trip up Kristen Clarke at her conformation hearing to be President Joe Biden’s assistant attorney general for civil rights. “Well, maybe there’s a misprint, but I’m sure you can clear it up for me, dating back to your days in school when you seemed …

Page Six reports: Colton Underwood is gay. The former “Bachelor” came out to Robin Roberts in a “Good Morning America” interview that aired Wednesday morning. “I’ve ran from myself for a long time,” the 29-year-old said in the pre-taped interview. “I’ve hated myself for a long time. I came to terms with that earlier this year and have been processing …

Fox News reports: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson doubled down on his recent comments about running for president, saying he has a “goal” to unite the country. The former professional wrestler recently responded on social media to a poll that claimed he would have massive support from Americans if he actually established and ran a presidential campaign. Speaking on the “Today” …

The Huffington Post reports: Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp said Tuesday voters waiting in line in Georgia could order food from Grubhub or UberEats after a new state law criminalized offers of free food and water near polling stations. “They can order a pizza,” Kemp said on the conservative cable news network Newsmax. “They can order Grubhub or UberEats, right?” Among …

TMZ reports: A gender reveal in Mexico went tragically wrong when a plane streaming a sign about a baby girl plunged into the waters off Cancun – killing two people on board while the parents-to-be and their guests watched in horror from a boat, according to reports. “It’s a girl!” the guests are heard screaming as the single-engine Cessna 206, …

The Daily Beast reports: South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem, a rising Republican star and potential 2024 presidential candidate, appeared flummoxed on Wednesday night over the fact that much of the spending in the Biden administration’s proposed infrastructure bill goes to, well, infrastructure. “I was on a call with the White House today with all of the governors talking about the …

“I would challenge him [Chuck Schumer] to bring the assault weapons ban to the floor of the United States Senate. It won’t get 50 votes, much less 60. I own an AR-15. If there’s a natural disaster in South Carolina where the cops can’t protect my neighborhood, my house will be the last ones that the gangs will come to …

The Huffington Post reports: Sen. Steve Daines (R-Mont.) sounded a bit too nostalgic Friday for the days when drug users bought his state’s “homegrown” methamphetamine, before the Mexican cartels moved in. He claimed the meth trafficking was due to illegal immigration. Not everyone on the trip seemed to be buying it. Fellow Sen. Mike Lee (R-Utah) was smiling through much …