Crackpots

Creationist Ken Ham: Chimpanzees Kill Each Other Because Adam’s Original Sin Totally Ruined Everything

This week famed primatologist Jane Goodall told a British newspaper of watching a years-long battle between two groups of chimpanzees which only ended when the last of the losing side had been killed. Goodall concluded, “War always seemed to me to be a purely human behaviour. I’ve come to accept that the dark, evil side of human nature is deeply …

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Ann Coulter To Trump: You Will Be Impeached

Ann Coulter raged against Trump this afternoon over his empty threat to veto the spending bill because it contains no DACA solution. Mediaite reports: If Coulter’s jumping on the I-hope-Robert-Mueller-indicts-Trump bandwagon, this could indicate a significant shift in her opinion on the president. Indeed, the conservative firebrand has bashed Trump before and said she has a limited amount of patience …

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Laura Ingraham Laments: Put The Big “Bienvenido” Mat Out Because This Wall Is Never Happening [VIDEO]

From Ingraham’s Lifezette: Fox News host Laura Ingraham said Thursday night on “The Ingraham Angle” that the federal swamp’s $1.3 trillion omnibus spending bill that President Donald Trump backs is “an embarrassment to the president” and makes her “embarrassed tonight as a Republican.” “The GOP just cannot get its act together,” Ingraham lamented. “My friends — I hate to say …

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Kellyanne Conway Solves The Opioid Crisis: Eat The Ice Cream, Have The French Fry, Don’t Buy The Street Drug

“On our college campuses, your folks are reading the labels, they won’t put any sugar in their body, they don’t eat carbs anymore, and they’re very, very fastidious about what goes into their body. And then you buy a street drug for $5 or $10, it’s laced with fentanyl, and that’s it. So I guess my short advice is, as …

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Christian Activist: Evangelicals Will Still Support Trump Because At Least He’s Not Raping Or Molesting [AUDIO]

“Obviously, we as Christians hold biblical values high, we believe in sexual purity, moral faithfulness, we’re against adultery and all the rest of that. So listen carefully here, the strategy is to bring up these events that all involve sexual sins, allegedly, because they know — the people, the strategists behind the scenes — they know that this will upset …

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GOP Rep Blames Deep State For Dr. Stabby’s Dining Set

The Huffington Post reports: Rep. Claudia Tenney (R-N.Y.) made yet another unfounded claim on Wednesday while speaking about Housing and Urban Development Secretary Ben Carson’s spending. The lawmaker was talking to a New York radio station when she blamed the “deep state” for a $31,000 dining set that Carson’s wife apparently ordered for his office. Tenney told the “Talk of …

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Nutjob Seth Rich Conspiracy Loon Claims He Was Nearly Murdered By Fellow Nutjob Seth Rich Conspiracy Loon

The Washington Post reports: As conspiracy theories swirled around the murder of Democratic National Committee staffer Seth Rich, lobbyist Jack Burkman took the unusual step of launching his own private investigation. A man with military and security experience stepped up to help. Now Burkman alleges that man, Kevin Doherty, nearly killed him. Burkman, a conservative lobbyist who has also raised …

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Christian College President Compares Gays To ISIS

Oklahoma Wesleyan president Everett Piper is getting a lot of attention for an op-ed he wrote for the far-right Washington Times. An excerpt: I recommend this simple exercise: Go to any article in any magazine or website that argues for “conversations” about sexual morality and simply replace the acronym of the day with another set of letters. For example, every …

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UTAH: Federal Court Dismisses Suit From Anti-Gay Nutjob Who Claims He Wants To Marry His Laptop

Ben Winslow reports at Salt Lake City’s Fox affiliate: A federal judge has dismissed a lawsuit filed by a man seeking the right to marry his laptop. In an order obtained by FOX 13 on Monday, U.S. District Court Judge David Nuffer rejected a lawsuit leveled by Chris Sevier, who argued that if same-sex marriage is legal he should be …

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Christian “Prophet”: White House Staff Turnover Is Just God Removing Those Who Oppose His Vision [VIDEO]

“God is separating the wheat from the chaff right now. If you are not on board with God’s vision — and people can blame this on Donald Trump all they want to, but Donald Trump was put in there to institute God’s vision, so you are either on board with God’s vision or you’re gone. It’s as simple as that. …

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Christian Site: How To Stop Illuminati Witches From Controlling Your Mind With Sound Waves This Easter

Charisma News is out with yet another of their super-helpful anti-witchcraft tutorials: Ex-witch Beth Eckert recently conducted a study on the Easter season, and what she discovered really forced her to grapple with the truth about the Easter season. Yes, resurrection Sunday is a time to rejoice in our Savior breaking the confines of death. And while Satan lost his …

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World Net Daily: Don’t Watch “Super-Whore” Stormy Daniels On 60 Minutes, The Interview Will Hurt Melania

World Net Daily is extremely freaked out about the Stormy Daniels interview set to air on 60 Minutes on Sunday, March 25th, at 7PM Eastern. An excerpt: Did the president have a brief affair with a porn star in 2006? I’m sure no one would be surprised to discover that he did. Will “60 Minutes” run an interview with Stormy …

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Linda Harvey: God Punishes America For Abortion By Making Gays Have Empty Sperm-Spilling Sex [VIDEO]

“One has to consider, first of all, the horrifying possibility that this complete sexual and human identity meltdown could be an aspect of God’s judgment on us for aborting millions of our children. It is very possible that as an instrument of God’s judgment, he is using the punishment to come on us through our children, the corruption of our …

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Christian Radio Host: The Second Amendment Gives Us The Right To Own Any Weapon The Government Does

Kyle Mantyla reports at Right Wing Watch: Tim Barton, who serves as the president of WallBuilders and co-host of the daily “WallBuilders Live” radio broadcast along with his father, Religious Right pseudo-historian David Barton, and former Texas state legislator Rick Green, insisted today that the Second Amendment guarantees to every American the right to own “the same level of weapons” …

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Hannity Boasts Of His “100% British” Racial Purity

In his latest attack on Elizabeth Warren, Sean Hannity decided to let the listeners of his SiriusXM radio show know that he is 100% British. Nope, there’s not a lick of dirty non-white blood in the Hannity clan. “Why wouldn’t Elizabeth Warren get one of those Ancestry tests? Ancestry was an advertiser on this program for a period of time. …

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Laura Ingraham Ridicules Student Activists: Who Needs Homework When You Can Get Credit For Screaming?

“You’ve got to hand to them, really. Leftists do know how to organize and protest. Students took part by the thousands. Who needs homework and history when you can get credit for screaming? Look, you’ve heard of like ‘Take Your Child to Work Day,’ well for the anti-Trump, anti-2nd Amendment crowd, this was ‘Make Your Student Protest Day.’ “There’s nothing …

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Conway Snaps At State TV Hosts Over WH Chaos

“I don’t have any personnel announcements. I have to say I’m just fascinated about all the stories about palace intrigue and personnel, and a lack of stories about policy, it really is amazing. Thank God the president himself goes out across the country, like he did for two solid days this week, and takes his message directly to the people.” …

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State TV: Rep. Adam Schiff Is A Russian Propagandist

Mediaite reports: Conservative radio talkshow host Mark Levin blasted Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA) over his handling of the ongoing Russia investigation. And he held nothing back. “Mr. Schiff is a shill for the Russian government,” Levin declared on Sean Hannity’s show. “And I’m gonna tell you why it is Schiff who is a propagandist for the Russian government despite his …

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Ingraham: It’s Not Chaos, It’s Smart Staffing [VIDEO]

The Hill reports: Fox News host Laura Ingraham said late Tuesday that multiple resignations and firings of top Trump administration officials isn’t a sign of chaos in the White House, but “smart staffing.” “Since last summer, the president has been slowly getting his team together,” Ingraham said during her opening monologue. “Think about it: He hired general John Kelly as …

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Sarah Palin To Keynote Mar-A-Lago GOP Fundraiser

The Palm Beach Post reports: Sarah Palin will keynote the Palm Beach County Republican Party’s annual Lincoln Day fundraising dinner on Friday at Mar-a-Lago, the party announced today. There’s no word yet on whether the venue’s owner, President Donald Trump, will be in town this weekend to possibly drop in on the dinner. “Surprise guests are always welcome,” says a …

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