“If there’s anything I’ve learned from watching hundreds of hours of Property Brothers, saying ‘It’s not for sale’ is the classic opening gambit, That means you’re ready to go. Greenland is definitely for sale.
“And, ladies and gentlemen, if we don’t move fast, some other country is going to overpay for it. Yeah, China, that lookie-lou, is going to come in all cash, snatch it up.
“So Denmark, I’m ready to sweeten the deal. There’s a couple of ways we could do it. We could do a straight trade. Greenland for Florida, OK? Yeah. Trust me, this is our best state. And please do not Google ‘Florida.’
“Not convinced yet? How about this, Greenland, once you’re part of the United States, you’ll be enrolled in the US Healthcare system. That’s right. Yeah. Also, please do not Google ‘US Healthcare system.’ Please.” – Conan O’Brien, on last night’s show.