“Approximately 80 percent of Americans are Christian, and 96 percent celebrate Christmas. Of the 20 percent who are not Christian, non-believers make up the largest segment, though the number of self-identified atheists is tiny. Today we are launching our ‘Adopt An Atheist’ campaign, the predicate of which is, ‘We want atheists to realize that there may be Christians in their community, even if those Christians don’t even know they are Christian.’ If we hurry, these closeted Christians can celebrate Christmas like the rest of us. As an added bonus, they will no longer be looked upon as people who believe in nothing, stand for nothing and are good for nothing.” – Catholic League blowhard Bill Donohue, asking his followers to troll atheist websites and offer to adopt people.
SPECIAL JMG HOLIDAY MESSAGE: Fuck you, Bill Donohue. Fuck you right in your motherfucking ear.