You Should Have Said Green Balloons

Former Missouri GOP House Speaker Rod Jetton has been arrested for felony assault for the Nov.15th beating and choking of his girlfriend. According to Jetton, the beating was part of consensual rough sex.

The affidavit attached to the probable cause statement alleges Jetton went to the home of the victim Nov. 15, where he and the victim drank wine and watched a football game. The victim claims Jetton hit her on the face and choked her, leaving bruises that the police department photographed. The affidavit claims the assault occurred during the night and into the morning of Nov. 16. It says Jetton and the victim agreed on a “safe word” “to use as a stop word during intercourse.” The safe word was allegedly “green balloons.” The next day, Jetton allegedly told the victim: “You should have said green balloons.”

Jetton left the Missouri House earlier this year and now runs a consulting firm that raises funds for conservatives in Missouri. Wonkette wonders how one says “green balloons” while being choked. Surely one of the rough boys that read this here website thingy can clue us in. ASL?

UPDATE: When Missouri updated its state law to comply with the Lawrence v. Texas ruling by the U.S. Supreme Court, which legalized homosexual sex, Jetton said, “Thanks to that deletion, it is now legal to engage in deviate sexual intercourse with someone of the same sex here in Missouri.”