Narchitecture

Via Father Tony comes this amusing blog post about narchitecture, a new name for Miami’s mammoth waterfront homes that appear to be owned by drug dealers.

Narchitecture is the pit bull of architecture. It grabs you by the (eye) balls and doesn’t let go, marrying a bevy of Mediterranean styles—neo-Classical, Spanish Revival and Fascist—with the vernacular American school known as Contemporary McMansion. The structures are big, overly-decorous and unabashedly gaudy, and, in their placement, show a complete disregard for their environment. The style veers heavily towards the monumental and its decorative motifs include Spanish tile, Roman-style arches and lots and lots of Italianate columns. It is an architecture that says, “Look at me. But don’t ask what I do.”

Spectacular examples of narchitecture can be found on the Venetians, a string of manmade islands one can skip across from Miami to Miami Beach. Shaquille O’Neal’s home on Star Island, just south of the Venetians, is also particularly painful.