Americans Just Don’t Get It

It looks like Americans get less sex that just about anybody.

Americans are not getting enough action. The United States is one of the world’s most undersexed countries, according to a new study released Monday. Just 53% of Americans having regular, weekly sex according to results from the Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey of 26,000 people in 26 countries, tying the USA with Nigeria for the second worst spot on the list.

Only Japan – the Land of the Rising Sun – where little else rises, apparently – fared worse, with 34% of those surveyed getting regular action. Greeks apparently have the hottest standard of living, topping the survey with 87% of respondants getting regular sex at least once a week.

It’s carnivale all year round in Brazil, which finished second with 82% of responders getting lucky. Russians apparently found something to do when it’s cold outside, finishing third in the survey with 80%. No surprise how China became the most populous country on Earth: It finished fourth with 78%.

No matter how much whoopie they’re making, the survey showed that only 44% of people are fully satisfied with their sex lives. Surprisingly only 60% of us say that “sex is fun, enjoyable, and a vital part of life,” according to the survey.

Personally, I wouldn’t complain if I were one of the once-a-week people.