Bob Allen: It’s Because The Cop Was Black

Disgraced Florida right-wing legislator Bob “Tea-room” Allen, whom you may recall was caught in a park restroom last month, offering a cop $20 for sex, now says he only played along because he feared black men: “This was a pretty stocky black guy, and there was nothing but other black guys around in the park.” According to the Orlando Sentinel, Allen was “intimidated” by the cop and was afraid he was “about to become a statistic.”

Here’s the cop’s transcript of his conversation with Allen after the righteous righty peered over into his stall and then joined him inside:

Allen: Hi, this is kind of a public place, isn’t it?
Cop: We could go somewhere else.
Allen: How about across the bridge, it’s quieter over there.
Cop: Well look, man, I’m trying to make some money; you think you can hook me up with 20 bucks?
Allen: Sure, I can do that, but this place is too public.
Cop: I wanna know what I gotta do for 20 bucks before we leave.
Allen: I don’t know what you’re into.
Cop: Do you just want a blowjob?
Allen: I was thinking you would want one.
Cop: But you’ll still give me the 20 bucks for that?
Allen: Yeah, I wouldn’t argue with that.

What a brilliant tactic! If you think you’re about to be mugged, offer your would be assailant some oral luvin! Peace will reign throughout the land!