Tag Archives: HA HA HA

Todd Starnes: The White House Is A Mess

Todd Starnes has the wailing sadz for Fox News: Look, I don’t know what’s going on in the White House – but it’s a mess. And the buck stops with the president. The White House is infested with those who pledge their allegiance to liberal ideology. Those individuals need to be given the heave-ho. There’s also a significant problem with ...

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Trump’s Approval Rating Sags To Near-Record Low

Via Quinnipiac: American voters, who gave President Donald Trump a slight approval bump after the missile strike in Syria, today give him a near-record negative 36 – 58 percent job approval rating, according to a Quinnipiac University national poll released today. Critical are big losses among white voters with no college degree, white men and independent voters. Today’s job approval ...

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Bryan Fischer Has The Mark Green Sadz: Trump Totally Flinched And Chose The “Gay Gestapo” Over Jesus

You guys, Bryan Fischer has a raging case of the sadz about Mark Green. He wails: Donald Trump rolled out his executive order on religious liberty last week to great fanfare, with a Rose Garden ceremony including many evangelical luminaries in attendance. And yet his order did not touch at all on the greatest threat to religious liberty in our ...

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The ACLU Mocks Trump’s “Fake News” Religious Order As An “Elaborate Photo-Op” Not Worth Suing Over

BOOM. Via press release from the ACLU: Today’s executive order signing was an elaborate photo-op with no discernible policy outcome. After careful review of the order’s text we have determined that the order does not meaningfully alter the ability of religious institutions or individuals to intervene in the political process. The order portends but does not yet do harm to ...

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Secret Service Bans Guns From Trump’s NRA Speech

Raw Story reports: Members of the National Rifle Association attending President Donald Trump’s Friday speech can expect to have their rights infringed upon. According to CNN’s Kevin Liptak, members will not be able to pack heat when the president speaks at the National Rifle Association Convention in Atlanta on Friday. From @kevinliptak: Secret Service says attendees at President Trump’s speech ...

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Paul Ryan Has The Epic Fail Sadz: We’re Going To Be Living With Obamacare For The Foreseeable Future

CBS News reports: House Speaker Paul Ryan, R-Wis., said the U.S. is “going to be living with Obamacare for the foreseeable future” after he abruptly canceled a scheduled vote on the contentious Republican health care bill Friday. “Obamacare is the law of the land, and it will remain the law of the land until it’s replaced,” Ryan said. “Moving from ...

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Trump Blames Democrats For Trumpcare Defeat

The Hill reports: “We were very close, it was a very tight margin. We had no Democrat support, no votes from the Democrats,” Trump said, flanked by Vice President Pence and Health and Human Services Secretary Tom Price in the Oval Office. “I think the losers are Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer because now they own ObamaCare,” the president added, ...

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Trump Drops 220 Spots On Forbes Richest List

FAKE NEWS! The BBC reports: Microsoft founder Bill Gates again tops Forbes’ list of the world’s richest people, in a year when the number of billionaires rose 13% to 2,043. According to the magazine’s annual rich list, Mr Gates’ fortune rose to $86bn, from $75bn, followed by investor Warren Buffett, up $14.8bn to $75.6bn. It was bad news for US ...

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TEXAS: Teabagger Former House Rep. Steve Stockman Dragged Away In Handcuffs For Embezzlement

Houston’s NBC affiliate reports: Steve Stockman, who served two stints in the U.S. House of Representatives, spent part of Friday in federal court. Stockman, a Tea Party favorite who courted controversy thorough two congressional terms, was brought into court Thursday shackled and handcuffed. He is accused of conspiring to violate federal election laws during his last term in office. It’s ...

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BREAKING: Homocon Milo Resigns From Breitbart, Spares Them The Humiliation Of Shitcanning Him

TRIFECTA. The Daily Beast reports: Right-wing provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos resigned on Tuesday from his tech editor position with Breitbart News following outcry over unearthed video appearing to show him defending pedophilia. “I wouldn’t give nearly such good head if it wasn’t for [Father Michael],” he joked in one interview, while dismissing concerns about pedophilia being abuse: “It was perfectly consensual. ...

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Trump’s Ridiculous Anti-Media Poll Backfires After Thousands Of Progressive Trolls “Sabotage” The Results

As many of you know by now, a couple of days ago the Trump team put out an absolutely insane anti-media poll to their mailing list. And surprise, surprise, the entire thing backfired. From the New York Daily News: Twitter users circulated the link far and wide — with several sharing screenshots of their answers bolstering mainstream outlets like CNN, ...

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Size-Obsessed Trump Tweets Cropped Inauguration Photo Wrongly Inscribed With Date Of Women’s March

Donald Trump just tweeted a panoramic image of his inauguration which conveniently obscures the wide swatches of open ground on the National Mall. His message: “A photo delivered yesterday that will be displayed in the upper/lower press hall. Thank you Abbas!” Hilariously, however, the image bears this inscription: “Swearing-In Ceremony Of Donald J. Trump – January 21st, 2017.” The 21st, ...

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Pope Sends Message To Trump: I Pray That You’ll Be Guided By Ethical Values And Concern For The Poor

LOL. Via press release from the Vatican: “Upon your inauguration as the forty-fifth President of the United States of America, I offer you my cordial good wishes and the assurance of my prayers that Almighty God will grant you wisdom and strength in the exercise of your high office. At a time when our human family is beset by grave ...

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More Trump Inauguration Performers Named

Quartz reports: Rumor has it president-elect Donald Trump is scraping a bit at the bottom of the barrel for entertainers for his January inauguration. His national anthem singer isn’t Beyoncé or Aretha Franklin, like it was for Barack Obama, but 16-year-old America’s Got Talent contestant Jackie Evancho. (“Who?” the US’s non-game-show-watching population asked in confusion.) The inaugural balls that take ...

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Hate Group: Send A Message Of Thanks To Pat McCrory To Take The Sting Out Of Losing To Those Evil Gays

Via press release from the Family Policy Alliance: This past year proved to be a challenging one for North Carolina Gov. Pat McCrory. The Legislature sent him a bill (HB2) that protected the privacy and safety of women and children by requiring people to use the bathroom consistent with the sex on their birth certificate. He gladly signed it, calling ...

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Trump’s Fantasy Cabinet: Secretary Of State Gingrich, Attorney General Giuliani, Defense Secretary Flynn

NBC News reports: Donald Trump’s cabinet-in-waiting is taking shape in the final days of the race, as aides eye a number of Trump loyalists for major posts should he win on Tuesday. Among the names being considered, according to conversations with three campaign advisers who requested anonymity to speak freely: Rudy Giuliani for attorney general, Newt Gingrich for secretary of ...

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SAD TROMBONE: Acting Chief Justice Tells Roy Moore To Clean Out His Office And Turn Over His Keys

SNORK. AL.com reports: Suspended Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore has been asked to turn over his keys and clean out his office. Acting chief justice Lyn Stuart sent two letters to Moore’s home in Gallant (Etowah County) on Monday. In one letter Stuart states that since Moore was recently found guilty of the ethics charges he must contact the court’s ...

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GOPremature Ejaculation: Mike Pence Was “The Clear Winner” Of Tonight’s Debate (Which Hasn’t Started Yet)

The Republican Party has egg on their faces, again, after publishing their analysis of the debate, which of course was won by Mike Pence. Yes, they’re talking about the debate that doesn’t begin for 90 minutes. Below are more screencaps of their psychic look into the near future.

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Kayla Moore Has The Shitcanned Husband Sadz: Evil Dems Brought Him Down With A Prancing Drag Queen!

All hail Ambrosia Starling! Via tear-soaked press release: The Foundation for Moral Law, a Montgomery-based legal foundation dedicated to strict construction of the Constitution according to its Framers, denounced the Court of the Judiciary’s Friday ruling suspending Chief Justice Roy Moore for the rest of his term. President Kayla Moore declared, “The ruling today regarding our founder Chief Justice Roy ...

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Roy Moore Has The Shitcanned Sadz

“This was a politically motivated effort by radical homosexual and transgender groups to remove me as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court because of outspoken opposition to their immoral agenda. This opinion violates not only the legal standards of evidence but also the rule of law which states that no judge can be removed from office except by unanimous vote.” ...

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