Tag Archives: Chuck Norris

Terrible Wig Man Endorses Roy Moore For Senate

Mobile’s CBS affiliate reports: Judge Roy Moore got the biggest “thumbs up” that any endorsement could offer in his run for U.S. Senate in Alabama on Monday. You guessed it. Moore was endorsed by “Walker, Texas Ranger” actor Chuck Norris. “Judge Roy Moore is the real deal: He’s tough, tested, and has a spine of steel,” said Norris. “The Washington ...

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Chuck Norris: I’m Ready To Run The FBI

This is actually just a World Net Daily commercial for Norris’s bottled water launch: Superstar Chuck Norris wants everyone to know he’s not looking for a job, but … if President Trump, whom he supported for president in 2016, wants him to replace James Comey as FBI director, he’s ready, willing and available. While promoting his new bottled water in ...

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So There’s Another Movie About How Christians Are Being Repressed In America

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Chuck Norris Robo-Calls For Gingrich

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Newt Tweets Chuck Norris

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Anti-Gay Douchebags: UNITE

The eight hate group leaders behind their new hero have all been the subject of multiple JMG posts. Vomit.

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Chuck Norris Wants The Christian Bible
To Be Taught In Every Public School

And all of his wigs agree!

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Crazy Chuck Norris Wants To Make Sure All Crazy Gun Nuts Get Out And Vote

At least everyone is dressed like a convict.

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World’s Second-Worst Hairpiece Suggested To Replace Michael Steele As RNC Chair

In a long story about potential candidates to replace RNC chair Michael Steele, Politics Daily closes with this: Maybe the GOP just wants to forget questions such as color and gender and pick the Republicans Party’s resident bad-ass. I’m talking, of course, about arch-conservative author, actor, and martial arts champion Chuck Norris. If you have high school kids, you’ve heard ...

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Chuck Norris: I May Run For President Of Texas

Over at World Net Daily, five-time Hairpiece Olympics gold medalist Chuck Norris is stoking the secessionist movement, saying he may run for president of Texas. He’s only half joking. When I appeared on Glenn Beck’s radio show, he told me that someone had asked him, “Do you really believe that there is going to be trouble in the future?” And ...

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Wig Force 2: Electric Boogaloo

Chuck Norris, 2008 Nightmare Hairpiece Olympics gold medalist, thinks that protesting against the result of Prop 8 is anarchy. Regardless of one’s opinion of Proposition 8, it is flat-out wrong and un-American to intimidate and harass individuals, churches and businesses that are guilty of nothing more than participating in the democratic process. Political protests are one thing, but when old-fashioned ...

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Hairpiece Prayer Watch

Washington DC, Sunday afternoon For unknown reasons, Chuck Norris’ exercise infomercial is playing on the TV in our hotel room. Jerry: Ugh, I can’t believe I used to think he was hot.JMG: I don’t think I ever did, but especially not now that he’s a right-wing nutjob. He writes a column on some Christianist website. It’s mostly about Jeebus. And ...

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