DC City Council Mocks Trump: Schools Open On Time Today But Giant Tank Parade Is Permanently Canceled

The Hill reports:

The D.C. Council mocked President Trump over his proposed military parade, which the Pentagon has confirmed is in the works. The District’s legislative body tweeted out a graphic of a “no tanks” symbol early Wednesday morning.

“The DC government will open on time today. DC Public Schools will open on time today. Sadly, the Giant Tank Parade is cancelled. Permanently,” the tweet read. The Washington Post reported Tuesday night that Trump had directed Pentagon officials to plan a military parade, which Pentagon and White House officials later confirmed.

  • Lumpy Gaga

    Tank-Free School zone?

  • skyweaver

    Nice troll, DC

    • Joe in PA

      Nice troll…but how many seconds till Trump threatens to withhold funding? POS.

      • Todd20036

        Let him. DC went 96% for Clinton.

        • Joe in PA

          Indeed. Actually it is congress that does the funding for DC, but still.

          • Todd20036

            If Congress dares to pull this stunt, there will be recriminations.

          • Mark Cross

            The District of Columbia: Taxation without representation at its finest.

          • Joe in PA

            I haven’t lived in the area for a while…is that still an optional license plate? If my memory serves me correctly Republican presidents chose not to have that on the various staff car plates, but then Obama changed that. I could be all wrong and just dreamed that. 🙂

  • Blake J Butler
    • Todd20036

      Is this about taking a knee, or about taking 2 knees in front of the guy in the gif?

      • David Walker

        Of course.

      • Blake J Butler

        Both are hot, but the guy in question is “assman” in the above tweet.

  • bkmn
    • TexasBoy

      “I love the poorly educated” – Donald J. Trump – February 23, 2016

    • james1200

      This is what happens when an old white man with tiny hands takes over for a young black man; he feels inadequate and is unable to perform and he makes us all pay for it.

      https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C26lJduUoAAxpcU.jpg

      • Todd20036

        Trump never got past that. NEVER

        • james1200

          Nor will he ever get past the fact he won’t be able to dismantle all of Obama’s legacy, including Dodd-Frank and Obamacare. Deep down, he knows what history will say about him, that he was a colossal failure and embarrassment.

          • Todd20036

            And the republicans are finding out that their base, except in certain districts, is too small to stop a blue tsunami.

            Even the apathetic are finally realizing what the democrats have been saying all along about the GOP.

            Given power, the GOP will let their Nazi core rise to the top, and only help the wealthiest.

          • james1200

            From ur lips…i’ll finally be able to breathe again if we take back congress.

          • David Walker

            A veto-proof Congress. I’d vote for that.

          • Todd20036

            Being able to hold your breath for long periods of time could come in handy in other ways.

            Just saying.

          • Paddycakes2001

            Also: Osama bin Laden is dead, and General Motors is alive. Trump also won’t be able to change either of those things. (Well, don’t let Trump know that Obama saved GM. He might get some ideas.)

    • William

      They tell it like it is.

  • Ragnar Lothbrok

    I think that Lankford Republican ( OK ) even said : Um, no

  • margaretpoa

    No tanks within 1000 yards of schools

  • Slippy_World
  • Blake J Butler

    Democratic participation in the Minnesota caucuses was up 30 percent from 2010, republican participation was down 50 percent.

    https://twitter.com/amyewalter/status/961227809791381504

    • Todd20036

      It’s a start.

    • misterjack

      And your man, Tim Walz came out ahead. (I was for Rebecca Otto, the more progressive choice, but will support Tim, of course),

      • Blake J Butler

        She came in a impressive second, Erin Murphy with the backing of our revolution came in third. the rest you can look up the results. At least one guy quit because he was disappointed in the results of last night.

  • AJA

    Raises an interesting question. Can the DC City Counsel or Mayor’s Office or whoever just like, refuse to issue permits for this?

    If not, I’ll cash in some vacation time to Tienamen Square this horse-shit.

    • Smokey

      I assume the parade would need a permit; I would roar if D.C. City Council denied it!

      • Paula

        Hold it in a red city. Make it complete with tanks, tank recovery vehicles, bulldozers, and other vehicles that weigh many tons.
        Midland, Texas would be a great idea. Maybe someplace in NC or KY.
        Edit: Colorado Springs. The armor units are already there. Let them tear up the same roads they have to drive on.

      • David Walker

        Wouldn’t it solve everything if they put a big tarp over the street? The tarp would keep the tanks from digging up the street. Right? Of course, the tarp would have to be red. Nothing blue ever again.

        • coram nobis

          It would last for the first five tanks, maybe. An M1 Abrams is what, 70 tons?

        • kareemachan

          GOLD!

    • MT YVR

      Actually… wouldn’t that just be most hilariously delicious irony of a lifetime if Trump pushed and pushed and pushed for this and then ultimately strayed over the line with “well, I’m president, they HAVE to do what I say” and THAT is what started the watershed moment of impeachment.

      His own fucking parade. lol

      (snicker)Sorry. Just imagining it. I’m good… I’m good…

    • The_Wretched

      Yes they can. Permits are needed. However, DC is actually ruled by Congress and they can override local control.

      • JaniceInToronto

        Yet another good reason not to live in D.C.

    • jmax

      Thousands of protesters lying in the street, blocking the parade route before it has a chance to pass Trump’s review stand. That would be glorious.

      • Chuck in NYC

        I would travel to DC to be one of those protesters, and I am sure I am not alone. The Pentagon is crazy to go forward with this.

    • Kruhn

      They can in the parts of the city that belong to the District, i.e. Pennsylvania Avenue till 15th St, NW and past 17th St. Constitution and Independence border the National Mall and would probably fall under The jurisdiction of the National Parks Service and I doubt they’ll day no to their boss or Zynke (or is it Perdue?) can overrule the NPS. Reason I know is I volunteered for Capital Pride years ago.

  • another_steve

    Can the monster compel the D.C. government to allow a parade on the city’s streets?

    Anyone know?

    • Tulle Christensen

      No, but Congress could

    • Smokey

      I suspect that if Council denied the permit then the R Congress would threaten to withhold funding or pass some onerous bill targeting the city.

      • Tulle Christensen

        Yes but it would need 60 votes in the Senate

  • greenmanTN

    We have enough problems with our infrastructure without driving tanks on the frigging roads.

    • MT YVR

      You know… that might be how the roads get redone!

    • David Walker

      Sensational new start-up: pothole incubators. Especially in DC. DC needs potholes badly.

  • Ragnar Lothbrok
    • William

      Oh look, there’s his award for surviving the 80s without getting an STD. That was his own personal Vietnam.

      • Lumpy Gaga

        Napalm Crotch

        • Joe in PA

          My new drag name! Thanks.

          • Lumpy Gaga

            What an odd name for one’s first pet.

          • Joe in PA

            Have you met my family? 🙂

      • unsavedheathen

        When in reality he is nothing more than a walking, talking glob of pussy discharge.

      • Annerdr

        He valiantly fought the war on VD.

      • Uncle Mark

        He IS Agent Orange. (The defoliant might also explain why he wears a toup’)

      • Stogiebear

        Yeah, right. Because that’s the one thing in the world he would tell the truth about.

    • Joe in PA

      Stealing that graphic. Extra points for the Russia flag, but I think I’ll add an NRA sticker for some extra “flair”.

      • David Walker

        One of his merit badges. I think one of them is for wolfing down 5 cartons of Girl Scout Mint Chocolate cookies.

        • MT YVR

          I misread that as wolfing down cartons of girl scouts. Fullstop.

          • David Walker

            Lines from “Ain’t Misbehavin'” when a character is asked who that woman was. “Who? Her? Oh, she’s nobody. Just a girl. Dropped off some Girl Scout cookies.”
            His answer is challenged and he replies, “What do you mean you didn’t know Girl Scouts deliver. They do. Yeah.”

          • Craig Howell

            Paging The Addams Family!

        • …wolfing down 5 cartons of Girl Scout Mint Chocolate cookies.

          Hey, hey! There’s nothing wrong with that. I mean, uh, hypothetically speaking, of course.

          Anyhoo, I’d bet dollars to donuts he also has one for chowing down on the Big Macs and fish filet sandwiches.

        • Mark Cross

          Okay, to be fair, I personally can’t begrudge him for wanting to wolf down any mint chocolate Girl Scout cookies. If I didn’t give him that “Mulligan”, I myself would be a hypocrite.
          Damn those squeaky clean, cute little girls and their irresistible cookies! I sense that somehow Obama and his socialism are to blame for those cookies. 😀

    • crewman
      • Why do those foolish trumpzees believe that he knows more than the Generals about ISIS? Damn, on the one hand he is all pro-military, while two seconds later he is cutting them down.

    • Richard

      Teddy Roosevelt talked about speaking softly and carrying a big stick. That’s why he’s on Mt Rushmore and Mussolini is remembered as a body dangled upside down from a wire.

  • MT YVR

    Tanks but no tanks.
    Tanks for the memories.
    Tank you, come again.
    Tanks for nothing at all.

    😛

    • jmax

      Being President is such a tankless job.

    • David Walker

      Should be a picture of lots of tanks pointing, gratefully, hornily toward Melania. Caption: Tanks for the mammaries.

      • MT YVR

        … I had an incredibly evil and snark filled thought at that. (snicker) I appreciate that, David. 😉

        (it was: wouldn’t it be cheaper just to get some silicone in a bucket? sameies, right?)

  • William

    Congress can override the DC council on pretty much everything.

    • Tulle Christensen

      yea, but the president can’t

  • ChrisMorley

    If the tRumpenFurher Parade had troops in these semi-naked uniforms, maybe we might enjoy the show? Thanks Sri Lanka.

    https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/3a62f7080b98c7144414aa4bb1aa68320cfd0d2a/0_130_5184_3110/master/5184.jpg?w=880&q=55&auto=format&usm=12&fit=max&s=b8b2e7226e691af9829edc520323fbbc

    • coram nobis

      Now that is an uplifting display.

    • William

      Is it wrong to hope for a windy day?

    • Bluto

      That embiggins nicely.

      • coram nobis

        Oh, you mean the hyperlink.

  • Steverino

    Christ, what next? Rename the National Mall to Red Square?

    • Ross

      Silly!

      TRUMP Square!

      • Talisman

        As if the dumpster would ever allow his name to be used royalty-free.

    • Karl Dubhe

      Trump Rectangle!

      A great place to get wrecked, and tangle with the big burly men. (or women, or both…)

  • Blake J Butler
  • coram nobis

    Maybe the DC Council is beginning to wonder who pays for re-paving Pennsylvania Avenue after a mechanized brigade or two have driven over it. At least France and Russia have made sure the paving on the Champs Elysee and Red Square is up to it.

    • Lumpy Gaga

      This isn’t Infrastructure Week, nerd.

      • coram nobis

        That’s a Federal program anyway. I have a feeling that all those tank treads on Pennsylvania Avenue might really bring on a government shutdown, and that’s assuming that it doesn’t collapse a Metro tunnel somewhere.

  • Bob Black
  • Gene Perry

    OK, so, wait a minute. Seriously, how do you protest a parade? Do you picket the parade by walking along side? Or, do you protest from the sidewalk as the parade passes? Or, do you pull a Tiananmen Square and block the tanks in the street?

  • billbear1961
  • Ninja0980

    Angry Trump tweet in 3,2,1…

  • Blake J Butler

    At least one person is pissed off that Tim Walz won the first straw in the caucus, complaining that the only people who could’ve voted were retireees in a 6-8 PM window. Pretty sure its a russian bot, because i think they focused their attention on whomever the gubernatorial nominee is for the democrats in Minnesota.

  • coram nobis

    Maybe Donald needs a pomade.

  • Blake J Butler

    “The snow was bad”, which republicans blamed for poor attendance.

    https://twitter.com/MinnesotaDFL/status/961284705319575552

    • misterjack

      Just a dusting of snow in Minneapolis. Barely shovel-able.

    • popebuck1

      So, the snow fell on the Republicans but not on the Democrats? Wow, God IS on our side.

  • Butch

    It might be better in this case to let him have his stupid parade and forget about it, so we don’t give him any “see, liberals hate the military and this country” talking points by opposing it.

    • Dazzer

      Why pander to a moron and pig-ignorant fans of a moron?

  • popebuck1

    I propose a giant concert to be held (and more to the point, televised) at the same time as the parade. Maybe make it a benefit concert for Puerto Rico (though that’s already been done) or something. Let’s see how the ratings fall out.

    • Kruhn

      That wouldn’t be a bad idea. Freedom Plaza is across the DC Government Building on Pennsylvania Avenue, theoretically on the parade route.

  • TexasBoy
  • PickyPecker

    OT: Today’s seeding schedule –
    1) Impatiens walleriana ‘Accent White’
    2) Impatiens walleriana ‘Deep Orange
    3) Apien graveolens var. ‘Afina Cutting Celery
    4) Agastache foeniculum ‘Anise Hyssop’
    5) Gaura lindheimeri ‘Sparkle White’

    Cuttings scheule-
    1) Alternanthera ficoidea ‘Partytime Joseph’s Coat’
    2) Plectranthus sp. ‘Iboza Vine’
    3) Ruellia Makoyana ‘Trailing Velvet Plant
    4) Rhoeo spathacea var. ‘Variegated Moses In The Cradle’

    • Sam_Handwich

      don’t eat all the seeds, PickyPecker!!

      • JaniceInToronto

        They’re for smoking, not eating…

    • guest

      Hopefully 2018 won’t be a big impatiens downy mildew year where you live.

    • billbear1961
    • Butch

      SEEDING? It’s 11 below zero. All I can think of is keeping the wood stove going.

    • coram nobis
    • Sounds colorful and lovely! But what is a cutting schedule?

      I had planted some peas in a planter, and they were just coming along nicely, until today. Our puppy decided to “prune” them for me. I broke her of digging by pouring white vinegar in her favorite digging spots. Maybe I should soak the wood the planter is standing on….hmmm.

      • ChrisMorley

        Here’s a nice Irish gardener to explain it all
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iHc5cIf4M0

        • Thanks! That was very informative. For whatever reason, I only have a terrific green thumb when growing vegetables. Flowers struggle under my care, and flowering bushes, shrubs and the like never flower.

      • PickyPecker

        ‘Cuttings’ are pretty much what it sounds like. Pieces of ‘parent plants’ are carefully harvested and then placed in a rooting medium until they generate enough roots to plant into pots.

        • Oh, ok. So, its similar in function to dividing peonies and snowball bushes.

          • PickyPecker

            That is considered ‘division.’ Cuttings are more like creating a clone.

          • But wouldn’t division be creating a clone as well? Just in a different manner?

          • Oh, and I’m not trying to be difficult, just trying to understand.

    • Robincho

      On your weeding schedule please include Douchebaggia trumpensis

    • Treant

      Mine’s nothing like yours; I’m waiting for my Easter Egg plant (Solanum ovigerum) to sprout. The dwarf Mini Marine heliotrope is dogging along at 5 out of 24 sprouts after 10 days.

      • PickyPecker

        You’d get faster germinaton and increase your % by using a heat mat under them (and other seeds as well). TIP: heat mats are outrageously expensive. Make your own with low-voltage wire, or better yet buy an elecric blanket and cover it with a lawn and leaf bag. 🙂

        • Treant

          I actually use one, and it wasn’t that bad–Hydrofarm brand, 17 watts. It heats the interior with the top on to about 85 degrees.

          It’s actually a little too warm for a lot of things and I have to put a towel between. 🙂

  • misterjack

    The only parade I want to see is the one with Orangeturd and his henchmen in an oxcart, being led to the guillotine.

    • coram nobis

      You might want to take up knitting.

    • Ross

      Oh! I would SO attend that parade!

      • misterjack

        Right?

      • Jean-Marc in Canada

        The ratings would be through the roof.

      • Mark Cross

        This would be me shouting on the parade route as Trump was dragged by…
        https://youtu.be/SkRszTTDuKc

    • Blake J Butler

      Also with the cameras of every network minus the kiddy ones to watch it happen. Then baby huey will get the impressive ratings and crowd attendance he so desperately clings to.

    • Stogiebear

      Just for the fun of it the oxcart should be pulled by a tank.

      • Reality.Bites

        With Trump on it, it would need to be.

        Poor little oxen with pulled muscles. 🙁

  • Ninja0980

    https://twitter.com/Emilylgoodin/status/961260284890550272
    O/T but if Pelosi retires the GOP would simply switch to another target and make him/her as hated as Pelosi is.

    • billbear1961

      With Trump in the Oval Office, where do they get off demonizing ANYONE else?

    • Cackalaquiano

      True, but career politicians need to pass the torch at some point.

  • gaycuckhubby
  • anne marie in philly

    orange dictator traitor dumpenturd! NO to your fucked-up parade!

  • ChrisMorley

    Next week it is Carnival across Europe. More of this to look forward to.

    https://www.mercurynews.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/germanycarnival.jpg

    • Jean-Marc in Canada

      It will indeed be fun.

    • Gianni

      I hope we get plenty of video footage of that.

  • gaycuckhubby
  • M Jackson

    But wouldn’t it be a job-creating exercise when the RNC paid all those people to line the sidewalks?

    • CB

      Maybe they can do it in Mobile, AL

      • coram nobis

        Or El Paso, TX. Ft. Bliss is right next door, home to part of the 1st Armored Div and the Air Defense Artillery last I heard, so it’d save the commute. There’s a German military post there as well, so they could pull them in too. And be in sight of Mexico, who would take it as a hostile gesture, so Donald would like that too.

  • ByronK

    I thought when they tossed this idea around for the inauguration, there were claims that the streets in DC couldn’t handle the weight and would collapse.

    • Pat Padrnos

      You are correct.

    • not that i wish the suffering on the troops or locals, but that would be hilariously funny and humiliating to the traitor.

  • Halou

    Small penis syndrome strikes again!

    • i can’t remember the last public official who had it this bad.

  • MoonlightUnkindledOne

    He can have his parade-as soon as he allows a tank to run him over during it.

  • Reality.Bites
  • andrew

    Donald so wanted to serve in the military, but those nasty bone spurs prevented him from accomplishing his dream. All he wants now is a big military parade where there is no danger that he will actually be in harms way, like real military folks.

  • ECarpenter

    As others have pointed out, tanks and similar military vehicles rip up normal city streets, causing expensive damage. And, of course, traffic snarls while the expensive damage is repaired. D.C. is not built for military parades.

    The French do like their military parades, but the streets the tanks drive on in Paris are paved with stone and built to handle them. They have always had to be prepared for fighting in the capitol, its been the scene of revolt and revolution for centuries, so Paris is built to handle the national army coming in.

  • ClevelandJim

    He should have his military parade some saturday on the road out front of maralago, instead of fucking around and disrupting DC.

    • coram nobis

      What, and tie up A1A on a vacationers’ weekend? That won’t be popular with the Chamber of Commerce in Palm Beach County.

      • ClevelandJim

        Too damn bad. I’m sure PB Co makes a lot of money from having that damn resort there, and you can be DAMN sure they’d be the first ones screamin for military help if the Cubans attacked!

        • coram nobis

          What has Dade-Metro got against PB Co.?

    • Gianni

      That would be really cool especially if a tank or two veered out of control and tore through his precious Florida White House.

      • ClevelandJim

        I like the way you think!

        • Gianni

          Just imaging the drone camera’s view of the destruction. Priceless!

      • Ann Kah

        Remake the fairways…

  • Gianni

    Why doesn’t Donnie just tour the closest military installation and review the military hardware right there? It’s all lined up and neatly parked in rows and he could even touch them and fantasize about driving the tanks. I’m sure the commander would even have a few tanks drive past Donnie so he could review them. I forgot – not enough public show for him to brag about. Sorry.

  • JCF
  • ospalh

    And DPRK has just shown four HS-15 ICBMs in their parade.
    Somebody tell Trump that he has no chance of winning this nuclear dick waving contest. Trump may have the bigger button, but Kim Jong-eun’s has the bigger parade-able missiles.