Kim Jong-Un: The Nuclear Button Is Always On My Desk

CNN reports:

North Korean leader Kim Jong Un held out a rare olive branch to the country’s southern neighbor Monday, offering talks over sending a delegation to the Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang next month.

Kim struck an unusually conciliatory note in his annual New Year’s Day address, declaring his wish “for peaceful resolution with our southern border.”

He nevertheless couched the message in more familiar bellicose language, warning the United States that North Korea’s nuclear ambitions were now complete and the launch button was “always on the desk in my office.”

  • Ninja0980

    Happy fucking New Year!

  • bkmn

    If he gets Trump to fire first, KJU wins since China and Russia will side with him.

    • Bluto

      It’s comforting knowing that the world’s 2 most unstable man-babies are sitting next to nuclear launch buttons.
      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/486baf0423520ab67e53b1be7aa6a643f7eb66cc1ebdbb8579e9f509199125e3.jpg

    • AmeriCanadian

      And you KNOW that’s his goal.

    • Chucktech

      Trump’s babysitters won’t let him do that. I’m reasonably confident of this.

      • bkmn

        I would not be surprised to learn that the Generals decided that at least one or two of them needs to sign off on any first strike, no matter how many times he pushes the launch button.

  • Bambino
    • BlackGayVeganAtheist

      The candy like shiny red button….

      • AmeriCanadian

        What’s the sense of having a button if it’s not to be pushed?

    • Todd20036

      Classic Ren and Stimpy. The first animated gay couple with their own series.

  • Dreaming Vertebrate

    Rocket Man: The launch button is always on the desk in my office.
    Dotard (to Mattis): Quick, find that desk and nuke it! Problem solved!

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist

    YOU CAN NOT MAKE THIS UP

    President Trump often has his finger on the button in the Oval Office — but for soda, not nuclear strikes.

    In an interview with The Associated Press, Trump revealed the purpose of a “red button” on his desk, which apparently is used to summon a butler with a Coke for the president.

    “With the push of a red button placed on the Resolute Desk that presidents have used for decades, a White House butler soon arrived with a Coke for the president,” the AP reported.

    When a reporter asked Trump whether it was the “nuclear button,” he pressed it to order some Cokes, then joked, “Everyone does get a little nervous when I press that button.”

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/443486c7a98bed931b383c07b7736d281aed3f57599e64ce53de9243b1966b96.png

  • Treant

    Doubtful. Having a literal open button is stupid and dangerous. Coverings can be broken, shattered, or punctured accidentally or on purpose and the “button” pressed.

    Hyperbole for the loss, Kimmy baby.

    • David L. Caster

      It’s a button on a phone. And to launch first is suicide for Kim.

  • Boreal
    • Todd20036

      I’m more worried about the button in Twitlers reach than Uns

    • eddiebeskeddie

      this is on our computer where I work. I work in Denmark. That goes to give you some idea of what Europeans think of this dum fuc.

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  • BlackGayVeganAtheist

    Crazy insane fat guy with really bad hair and nukes… not good

    And we still have to worry about that Kim Jong Un dude as well

    • David L. Caster

      Kim knows that if he pushed that button in anger he would be incinerated in just minutes. He desperately wants a deal but puts on a game face.

      • BlackGayVeganAtheist

        Agreed…he needs these sanctions to FEED his people as so they can adore him for years to come

  • DaddyRay
    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      You’re too late. Bambino’s “agent” pressed that button first!

      • DaddyRay

        but mine has a cat

        • Dreaming Vertebrate

          Looks like it was cat against cat.
          But Bambino’s cat vaporized your cat first. Sad!!

          • DaddyRay

            Oh I didn’t see it – guess I have to clean the litter box

      • Bambino

        All is good. We are still alive. For now.

        • Dreaming Vertebrate

          Just starting the new year off practicing my snark!
          Don’t want to get caught unprepared when the real trolls arrive.

    • liondon#iamnotatraitor

      Stupid cat.

  • JohnJay

    Please stand for the National Anthem

    https://youtu.be/_dnZHea_TI0?t=4m18s

  • Bambino

    As we watch the two dumb fucks treating the planet as their game show.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e755c39b94b671fc61c220b3eec5d97602c013a6030c57194e3d28faba82a716.gif

    • Dramphooey

      That makes me think of November 2016.

  • Slippy_World
    • Bambino

      Ewwwwwwww

    • Bambino

      Hmmmmmm I’m waiting for the dotard to reply. If I tweeted this image to the dotard will Twitter ban me?

      • Treant

        You? Yes, you don’t bring in the bucks. Now if Dotard did it, there would be no consequences.

      • David L. Caster

        They may not. There are no actual genitalia shown in the picture. It’s a political cartoon.

        • Bambino

          I suppose.

    • MBear

      Disturbing on so many levels

      • Bambino

        Still a lot less harmless if the two will get a room.

      • David L. Caster

        But somehow not exactly wrong in it’s depiction of a truth.

      • Goodboy

        I’ve known many that can separate the guy from the dick as long as it’s a big one. I’m sure those that have those feelings must be even more disturbed looking at this pic.

        On a side note the pic in the background really completes it.

    • FAEN

      🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

    • Kruhn

      Gag me! Yuck. I almost threw up in my mouth!

    • shellback
      • Tor

        That cat is a total amateur. I don’t see any expensive carpets, tangles of computer wires, or even a keyboard.

  • Ninja0980

    https://twitter.com/SohrabAhmari/status/947097804882825216
    This is the level of stupid I’ve seen on the right with the Iran protests.
    Just because people are protesting doesn’t mean they want U.S. help or like Trump and yet in these people’s stupid and arrogant minds, these protests mean just that.

    • Dramphooey

      They desperately want a win and they haven’t gotten it. I’ve seen them talking about the so called tax cut but even they don’t believe it. Even the stupid ones that act like they believe it probably don’t believe it; they just want to “own” us.

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist

    I don’t accept that North Korea is a threat.

    I also don’t believe Trump’s threats.

    The military could, and should defy any attempt to start a war not authorized by Congress.

    The national focus has been hijacked by a showman. Instead of facing our problems, the executive branch is bumping popularity by introducing an external threat. Starting a war can boost the economy temporarily.

    The press loves controversy – it sells metaphorical papers. Appeals to blind patriotism discourages domestic opposition.

    Have we been fooled again?

    • KnownDonorDad

      There’s no way NK will start the war, I just don’t trust Trump not to get baited into a strike – hopefully SECDEF Mattis will be the voice of reason. But thousands and thousands of dead Koreans, not to mention Americans living abroad – I can’t see how that wouldn’t be a supreme negative for the administration.

      • BlackGayVeganAtheist

        Kim doesn’t want war because that would destroy him along with his country. However, after witnessing the 2003 Iraq invasion by the US and being more than a little paranoid, he, like the leaders of Iran, took to heart the simple lesson that those with nuclear weapons don’t get invaded. And who can argue with that, thanks to George W Bush. That’s why both countries are obsessed with developing a nuclear weapons capability.

        The only difference between them is that N Korea’s leaders are willing to endure all manner of economic deprivation for their people whilst Iran’s are not. Which is why economic sanctions worked on Iran to halt or at least substantially slow its nuclear programme but why they are ineffective against N Korea – as are infantile threats from our child-like incumbent in the White House.

        Trump has done nothing to stop or even slow N Korea’s nuclear weapons development. He may even have accelerated it. And all he’s left to peddle is more bluster and b/s.

      • Bambino

        I can’t see a clean nuclear strike at North Korea without affecting China. Little Kim feeling secure not from his nuclear weapon rather sitting comfortably in China cushion.

        • KnownDonorDad

          Oh, it would be a conventional strike, followed by Kim sending his armies across the DMZ and emptying his arsenal at South Korea and Japan in a disastrous final act of defiance.

          • kareemachan

            He IS batshit crazy….

          • thatotherjean

            So is the guy we’re stuck with, for now.

    • kareemachan

      It reminds me of when Cheney the Dick had a hard-on to nuke Iran.

  • liondon#iamnotatraitor

    Crooked Hillary…heh.

  • Dramphooey

    I always read complaints about how Trump is being normalized. Well, Trump has normalized North Korea. “Make America Great Again” say the traitorous idiots but all I have seen this morning, the first of the New Year, is my country being played because it put a moron in charge. But surely I’m wrong because a fucking train station was named after the asshole.

  • KnownDonorDad
    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      Rocket Man: How you get that picture of my nuclear button! Yankee Spy!!
      EASY: Exterminate and Annihilate Stupid Yankees

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist

    Some people are asking why isn’t China doing more against North Korea…here is a better question:

    Why would the Chinese fulfill America’s dreams only to usher in China’s nightmares?

  • greenmanTN
  • boobert

    Welcome to 2018 ! 12 hours in , and we have possible wars with Iran, Pakistan and North Korea.

  • Scout
    • Chucktech

      The New York Times, like Facebook, has much to atone for.

  • bkmn
    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      Ah, … snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.
      These people are idiots.

      • Michael White

        yes, this is my fear for this November’s election. It is ours to blow

    • Boreal

      Fuck the “Justice Democrats” aka the campaign to re-elect dump.

      • Dreaming Vertebrate

        And that is exactly what it is.
        I wonder if most of their big donations can be traced back to republican donors like the Mercers.

        • Todd20036

          There’s a comment below that I had blocked. Just out of curiosity, who was it?

          • Dreaming Vertebrate

            Probably it was “I love dim sum”.
            I see a post from them.

        • Boreal

          If we had we real journalists in this country, someone would be following the money.

      • I love dim sum

        Don’t worry, Hillary will make sure Trump gets elected a 2nd time. She’s such a narcissist that she will run again, she’s already saying she wants to be involved in 2018 elections.

        • McSwagg

          Russian bot, or Russian bought … You be the judge.

    • Friday’s_cat

      Bernie Bro rat fucking operation.

      • bkmn

        I won’t be surprised to find out at some later time that they were funded by Putin, Dick Armey, the Mercers or Kochs, and thought it would be fun to use lefty money to screw over the Dems.

        • Dreaming Vertebrate

          Dotard: That’s right! OPM – Other people’s money.

        • Misutaa Roboto

          This. The left needs to know that the Russian regime will manipulate them just as readily as they do the right as long as it serves their purpose of breaking the power of the U.S. (and/or other rivals). They were behind the Calexit movement, and the Russian Greens (the “Ecological Party”) has basically called out the American Greens for being Putin shills.

          • bkmn

            Disruption and chaos are weapons for the Putin and the far righters.

      • I love dim sum

        Do you refer to all the women that supported Bernie as “Bernie Bros” too?

        • olandp

          I refer to all people still fighting this battle for Bernie as brain-dead morons.

    • Treant

      Oh, dear, “Justice” “Democrats,” that’s really awful. Also, fuck all y’all sideways with a cactus coated in capsicum pepper.

    • Chucktech

      Just because one is a Democrat doesn’t mean they’re not a gullible dim-bulb doofus.

      • I love dim sum

        You are referring to Hillary supporters as being gullible dim-bulbs, correct?

    • I read this as “blah-blah-blah-how dare she win more votes than the crusty old man we, a minority of Dem voters who want our voices to count more than other people’s, decided is better than her because white male privilege”

    • I love dim sum

      I love seeing all the butthurt from you Hillary supporters about this. You defend someone that cheated during the primaries, yet, “WAAAAH Russia hacked precious Queen Diva Hillary’s election!!!!! I’m with HEEEEERRRRRRRRRR!” LOL.

      • KnownDonorDad

        Let Mueller finish his investigation.

    • Acronym Jim

      I read their platform. The stupid thing is the overwhelming majority of items listed on their platform are also supported by “establishment” Democrats.

      • bkmn

        It is amazing how many people (including reporters) don’t realize that Bernie and Hillary were in synch on well over 90% of the issues.

    • Todd20036

      Meanwhile Bernie wasn’t a democrat before or after the election.

      • bkmn

        It was nice to see people giving the WaPo a lot of pushback after they published an article that Dems shouldn’t count on big wins just based on polls with a picture of Bernie at the top of it.

  • TheManicMechanic

    No, Kimmie, that’s just one of those big red buttons from Staples that go, “That was easy!” when you push it. Same thing as the Dotard has on his desk.

    • JAKvirginia

      Dotard’s Red Button is for Diet Coke.

  • Bastiane
  • Scout
  • Chucktech

    One big difference between our Nuclear Button and NK nutjob’s Nuclear Button: Ours actually works. This lying asshole has no such button.

  • Harveyrabbit

    If his nuclear button is as dangerous as his sidearm I’m not gonna lose any sleep over it.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2e878b8fc49fb22843295960eb86e5ba2ffb742e467ada5c787db33e80d42fa4.gif

  • Karl Dubhe 2

    His nuclear arsenal doesn’t worry me nearly as much as his biological arsenal does.

    • kareemachan

      [gags]

  • Given the fact the DPRK’s missiles are on mobile launchers and not a fixed position, the likelihood of a direct “button on my desk” is not high.

    • Acronym Jim

      It’s an app on his iPhone that auto-texts the mobile launchers. Let’s hope auto-correct comes to the rescue.

      “Glorious Leader is telling us to fibre muscles. We must show our appreciation for his concern with our physical fitness with vigorous goose-stepping.

      https://i.imgur.com/BLSu76K.gif

      • Acronym Jim

        P.S.: Talk about bone spurs. Ouch.

      • Paula

        I have always thought this is why NK has such a large army. 90% of them have too many back problems to do anything because they march like this.

      • Gianni

        They always look so silly. Whole groups in formation bouncing along like Bobble Heads.

        • Acronym Jim

          I call it the Glorious Leader Lindy Hop.

          • Gianni

            🙂 That’s a good one.

        • Mike in NC

          That reminds me of Monty Python’s “Military Fairy” skit.

  • I love dim sum

    North Korea offered to suspend its nuclear program in 2015 if we stopped conducting military exercises on the peninsula. Guess what? Obama refused….Thanks a million Obama, you really earned that Nobel Peace Prize didn’t you?

    • MBear

      To clean the toilet bowl add a 1/2 cup baking soda to 1 cup white vinegar in toilet bowl. When the fizzing stops, swish bowl a few times with bowl brush and flush.

      • JeauxFan

        Love it

    • JeauxFan

      Because appeasing spoiled brats works so well, and KJU is so trustworthy …
      Go post your nonsense on Breitbart. We’re not having it here, Felicia.

    • Gianni

      You have a really hard-core understanding of international relations, don’t you. And, you don’t like Obama so why not blame him for everything? Would you so readily kiss Li’l Kim’s ass? Donnie made noise during his campaign that he’d be willing to sit down and talk with Li’l Kim. “Sure, why not”, he said. When’s that going to happen?

  • Paula

    I never keep my nuclear button on my desk, its too messy. I put it in the pantry so I have to go to push it.

    • Bad Tom

      Plus, initiating nuclear war is hungry work.
      Best to have snax nearby.

      • Mueller Abides

        Love snax.

  • Phil

    He’s lying. It’s probably for one of those remote control vibrating butt plugs…….

    • JeauxFan

      Ew

  • JT

    Bellyclose … and button. Li’l Kim has a nuclear belly button.

  • JCF
  • DaveMiller135

    You know what else is always there? A little tiny target on your forehead. The US is now being led by a third grade mind. You can’t afford to try to match him in petulance.

  • Natty Enquirer
  • KevInPDX

    Chubby Cheeks (x 2 – Fore and Aft).

  • I am starting to like this guy. I think he has a sense of humor maybe. He sure is trolling TrumpUS effectively.

  • LesbianTippingHabits

    Donald Trump is jealous because North Koreans appear to adore Kim Jong Un.

    And they do it so well. /s