Scamvangelist Paula White Remembers That Time Obama Threw The Baby Jesus Out Of The White House

Via Mediaite:

Megachurch televangelist Paula White, President Donald Trump’s spiritual adviser, appeared on Fox & Friends to celebrate the administration’s victory in the war for Christmas.

“Isn’t it nice to be able to say Merry Christmas, and to put Jesus Christ back on the White House lawn?” White, the chair of Trump’s evangelical advisory board, declared.

It’s not clear where Paula White is getting her specific information from, however. The Obama administration never removed Jesus Christ from the White House, and declared “Merry Christmas” every year.


You might recall this Christian Post article from last year.

Longtime televangelist and senior Pastor of New Destiny Christian Center in Apopka, Florida, Paula White offered her followers an Easter Sunday deliverance from a spiritual death sentence for a $1,144 “resurrection seed” she says was set by God.

Preaching the story of Lazarus who Jesus resurrected from the dead in John 11:38-44, White promised believers in a video appeal that if they would sow the seed and have faith, she believed deliverance would come.

  • Michael R
  • greenmanTN
  • olandp

    Exodus 20:16.

  • Patrick

    Great news the war on Christmas is over. Please proceed.

    • …does that mean we won’t have to hear about it again?

      • OdieDenCO

        the made for TV movie comes out next week

    • gothambear

      but i just burned my draft card ;(

  • Gee, Ms. White, doesn’t your holy book say something about not lying? I could have sworn you guys had it as one of your main rules.

    • Tomcat

      It’s alright if it is a jihad.

    • licuado de platano

      I think it made the top ten.

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist

    When FOX News has to push this made-up war in order to make Trump look good, you know he’s probably desperate as hell.

    But then again Fox will do ANYTHING to praise Trump and drag Obama thru the mud as it is makes their viewers salivate with delight.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dc9110e71fe5e6cf784a4a8401b5e68c06a5a28060abae4af44a71a5880a71f0.gif

  • ohbear1957
    • Tomcat

      And it says made in China.

      • margaretpoa

        And I’m pretty sure the real grail wouldn’t say “In Trump we Trust”.

        • lattebud

          And “Make America Great Again”

  • Nax

    The worst part is that, with this statement, there are millions of other people who will also remember this. I live in a town with a few thousand of them. And there is nothing, nothing, that I can say or show that will convince them otherwise.

    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      Seriously.

      1. Get all the smart people out of westTexas by promising them a new house, a good job, and free college for the kids.

      2 Get all the stupid people to move to west Texas by promising them no minorities as neighbors, free unlimited guns, and all the opioids they could ever want.

      3. Build a fucking wall around it, and gift it to the Sinaloa cartel in Mexico.

      4. Problem solved.

  • gaycuckhubby

    I remember that! It was the same day he declared all opposite-sex marriages null and void

    • Tomcat

      And took everyone’s guns away. What a day that way.

      • Cackalaquiano

        …and later mobilized the troops to round up everyone’s bibles. Yeah, he was busy.

        • And forced us all to eat healthy.

          • i can’t believe you people are forgetting forced same sex act day. that was something, forcing it down so many throats.

          • Cackalaquiano

            “Jesus never ate kale!!”

          • JCF

            And forced all pregnant women to have abortions.

      • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

        And forced everyone to have an abortion whether they were pregnant or not.

    • Ninja0980

      And made it so if you so Merry Christmas you went to camps.

    • Dayglo

      Oh, that fateful day when his Kenyan Socialist troops burst into my home and forced me to have sex with a man. And they burned all of my Toby Keith records.

      • trouble94114

        hopefully the man was Toby Keith.

  • OdieDenCO

    recall the mortician. that make up doesn’t look life like at all.

  • Tomcat

    So how long until we have a great cathedral on the whitehouse lawn?

  • shellback

    Women shall not speak in the church. Does that ring a bell, Whorella?

  • Duh-David

    Donald Trump has won The War Against Christmas, proving he’s the guy to lead us in all wars that exist only in the imagination. That’s so comforting.

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist
    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      Pfft. Janis Joplin said that the Laws was partial to Mercedes Benz.

      • agcons

        But only if one needs to make amends. If not, Porsches are the thing.

        • paganguy

          Worked hard all my life. No help from my … oh… no… wait… I get by with a little help from my friends.

          • Lumpy Gaga

            I miss “Dialing for Dollars”.

  • Tomcat

    The atrocities perpetrated in the name of religion should have made ALL of mankind cringe and demand it’s end, but no they want the power to do it all again.

  • Cuberly Deux

    Forget the war on Christmas, what about the war she’s fighting against her own face?

  • BlackGayVeganAtheist
  • Michael White

    I am all for free speech no matter how obnoxious, but this is just insane speech.

  • margaretpoa

    Good grief. Take a putty knife and scrape about five pounds of that crap off your face and then go get some sun. Either that or just stay under your sheet and hood from now on.

    • MaryJOGrady

      I think it’s spackle. It’s probably already dried.

  • Boreal

    Well to be fair to President Obama, baby jeebus was smelling a bit rank.

    http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/21/212e4ad84be878376697876f54ee4b96743444d1f6b4bdb8f850cf31ac1251c7.jpg

    • Menergy

      Oh my god….LOLOL. The things one finds on the intertubes!!

  • safari

    And my father is performing his morning puking in the sink ritual while I’m eating breakfast.

    • Treant

      I’m afraid to ask.

      • safari

        I have no idea. He says sinuses, but I don’t know of anyone else who needs to vomit every morning.

        • Boreal

          Sinus pressure can make you nauseous. I get it every am but usually after taking sinus meds and a sneezing attack the pressure is relieved and the nausea goes away.

          • E.J.

            Sometimes standing in a hot shower with the spray on your face helps…..sometimes

          • clay

            I found being 1200 miles away from my father helped.

        • zhera

          Often when I’m congested, slimy, coughing, etc. I end up puking because my gag reflex is hyper-sensitive.

          • clay

            We call that “lack of practice”.

          • zhera

            Probably is, too. 🙁

          • Dayglo

            Cancel my western omelette.

        • doninkansas

          I used to have that when I would get up in the mornings, mostly from drainage down the back of throat. After my third sinus surgery it finally stopped being so bad.

  • anne marie in philly

    STFU, you lying blond snake!

  • Tomcat

    Tell the truth now. Who would be more likely to throw the Middle Eastern dark skinned Muslim looking man out of the Whitehouse??? Come on now, get real.

  • Reality.Bites

    Basically, they can’t tell the difference between the President of the United States and a Walmart greeter.

    • Tomcat

      But they are both senile.

    • Nah, our current President isn’t qualified to be a Walmart greeter either.

      • lattebud

        Would he know how to pull a shopping cart of from a line of shopping carts?

  • Bluto

    Pure fucking evil bullshit.

  • That girl hasn’t a God-given color, shape, or texture visible above the neck.

    • MaryJOGrady

      I’m trying not to think about below the neck, but I’m sure your observation applies there, too

  • Harveyrabbit
  • Boreal
    • Todd20036

      Yup. Fox could come right out and say that and they’d never lose a viewer.

  • DesertSun59

    You’ll note that apparently every one of 45’s a&&licking worshipers has now stated the exact same thing. Obama was a Muslim who helped Hezbollah, was never seen anywhere near a church, and who never said Merry Christmas to anyone.

    All of that is despite the fact that there are hundreds of recorded instances of the exact opposite.

    This is part of the decadence that befell Rome before its fall.

    The empire is about to collapse and there is now nothing anyone can do to stop it.

    • MBear

      The nature of religiousness is the belief in something even though the overwhelming evidence indicates otherwise.

      So…this is normal

  • Boreal
  • safari

    We could just skip the middle man and pay her surgeon directly.

  • John Ruff

    A face only a mother could punch

  • Larry Larson

    Bleached blonde hair, whore red lips, and a Jezebel frock. Just how Trump likes his preachers.

  • joe ho

    PBS News Hour had Tony Perkins on last night praising Trump and religious freedom. Why I don’t watch PBS news hour anymore. (I was just channel surfing.)

  • BobSF_94117

    and to put Jesus Christ back on the White House lawn

    Chained to the fence, I assume.

    • no, he gets his own little stall and some hay, too.

    • zhera

      Pushing the lawn mower.

  • Mrs. Councillor Nugent

    There you go with truth and facts again. Please don’t confuse the sheeple.

  • Karl Dubhe 2

    Her version of “freedom” and “liberty” seem to be different to mine. I’ve always thought religious freedom was freedom to believe what you wanted to; they seem to think that it means the freedom to impose their religious beliefs on others.

    The version of liberty seems to be the “liberty to own others as their property.” Or in Fox’s case, the “liberty to misinform others for profit”.

    Either reality intervenes with people like her, or we’re all going to be badly fucked over.

    • David Walker

      I’ll get the condoms and lube.

      • Karl Dubhe 2

        Sure, but they’re not interested in that kind of fucking. 🙂

        • David Walker

          Oh. Never mind.

    • Charles Nelson

      Her idea of religious freedom is unleashing the Inquisition against whatever she makes it to be.

  • BearEyes

    were those seeds for very tall beanstalks?

  • MaryJOGrady

    I don’t think anybody ever put an image of the Baby Jesus on the White House lawn. I’m sure I would have remembered the separation of church and state lawsuit(s) over that one.

  • Ragnar Lothbrok

    There is a thing called an Evangelical Advisory Board ??

    Fuck THAT!

  • Jean-Marc in Canada
  • 2patricius2

    It’s difficult to properly mend a cracked pot.

  • Mueller Abides

    I got some ‘seed’ for this over botoxed crone.

  • Kevin Andrews

    The scamveligical toxin flows freely. If it’s lips are moving and its chest going up and down; it’s lying. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/15e0546972cbe63a4322284104268dd85c6cca3ec7ee9c1b3f87563859a0f047.png

  • zhera

    “Trump just hasn’t put Christ back in Christmas”

    Do you think anyone at Fox or around the Dotard noticed that mistake?

  • Matt

    “I’m a whore for Jesus!… Wait, maybe it was ‘Hey-soos.’ I think I need to go now…”

  • kladinvt

    Comrade Cheetos & Fox have turned the phrase, “Merry Christmas”, into a ‘challenge’ and if they don’t get the proper response, then “Merry Christmas” translates into “Fuck You”. How very Fundie-Cultist, of them.

  • Steve Smith

    Why the fuck does anyone need an Evangelical Advisory Board? might just as well have a Deranged Junkie Lunatic Advisory Board, there’s little difference. but the deranged junkies might make more sense.

    • clay

      Why the fuck does anyone need an Evangelical Advisory Board?

      Because even Kellianne Conway can’t poll and model how those people function; their in need of constant observation.

    • Vintagechick

      Here’s a thought…what if the “rapture” occurred and all the evangelicals were taken away…and those of us left were thoughtful and caring and intelligent…wouldn’t that be great?

      • MaryJOGrady

        There is one fellow at my gym who has me within millimeters of asking him to sign a witnessed document to the effect that when/if he is raptured, I get all his stuff.

  • R W C

    And on the other side of the Christianist’s Xmas coin….
    https://vimeo.com/246983302

  • clay

    Speaking of snatching the Baby Jesus . . .

    “Topless Femen activist tries to snatch Jesus statue from Vatican crib” –Reuters
    https://www.reuters.com/article/us-christmas-season-femen-vatican/topless-femen-activist-tries-to-snatch-jesus-statue-from-vatican-crib-idUSKBN1EJ0O2?il=0

  • Hank
    • GanymedeRenard

      A fake evangelist advising a fake president… About the very, very few things that makes sense in this administration.

  • JWC

    Paula white Just FUCK OFF

  • andrew

    Rational people know where Paula White and all scamvangelists get their “specific information.” They pull it out of their asses. The place where their brains are located.

    • Friday

      Their ‘specific information’ source is simple. The fringier Christian preachers make up lies, then more preachers and right-wing news outlets, then Fox, then Drumph, repeat those lies endlessly, no matter how blatantly disproven they are. Then they tell the people they conned that *they’re* the ones being attacked ‘For their faith’ if anyone shows the obvious evidence to the contrary.

  • Friday

    Christianist liars pretending to be a news organization while disinforming the American voters. Deliberately. They really don’t belong on the public airwaves.

    • RJ Bone

      They don’t belong breathing our air. To the Moon!

  • MikeBx2

    A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet. 1 Timothy 2:11-12

    • RJ Bone

      IOKIYAR?

  • Mueller Abides

    What’s the deal with her face?

  • Queequeg

    Trump offered bany Jesus a golden shower.

  • John Kusters

    Isn’t there a prohibition in the Bible about letting women be in places of authority?

  • David Slater

    she is a heretical apostate…what a cartoon character

  • Gianni

    No wonder she appears on FUX News. She meets their standards: not very bright and not well informed. Oh, and now we can say “Merry Christmas” and not get arrested. I’m grateful for small and ridiculous favors.

  • JHunter
  • William Cain

    This preaching whore needs to get married again and shut the F#!k up!

  • “It was an early afternoon in late July, and Paula White was holding court before an audience of about 25 Southern Baptist ministers in an ornate diplomatic reception room in the Eisenhower Executive Office Building. The televangelist was recounting one of her favorite stories — about when Donald Trump reached out to her in 2011 for guidance on a possible White House run. “Would you bring some people around me to pray?” she said he asked her. “I really want to hear from God.” White recalled that she and another pastor gathered about 30 ministers from different evangelical Christian traditions at Trump Tower in Manhattan. After the prayer session, when Trump asked her what she thought, she responded: “I don’t feel it’s the right timing.”

    He listened, she continued, and the two talked and prayed about the matter over the next four years. When White again gathered religious leaders at Trump Tower in September 2015, she backed the decision he’d already made to run. Videos on YouTube of that event show her standing on his right, head down, laying hands on him as she prayed.”

    I seriously doubt trumP ever asked her or anybody else “Would you bring some people around me to pray?” If the real truth ever comes out it would be more along the lines of somebody much, much smarter than trumP introduced White to him suggesting that her particular brand of grifting for gawd was right up his alley.

    to read the entire article…
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/she-led-trump-to-christ-the-rise-of-the-televangelist-who-advises-the-white-house/2017/11/13/1dc3a830-bb1a-11e7-be94-fabb0f1e9ffb_story.html?utm_term=.fc88f6959b13

  • Puck

    Where are all the gun toting crazy to put her out of her misery?