Top Evangelical To Roy Moore: Take A Polygraph Test

Southern Evangelical Seminary president Richard Land has posted an open letter to Roy Moore in the Christian Post, where he is executive editor. An excerpt:

I hope and pray that these allegations against you are false and I know in the American justice system you are “innocent until proven guilty.” However, this is not the legal system, but the court of public opinion.

Judge Moore, as a brother in Christ, I implore you, for the sake of your family and your supporters, but even more importantly, for the sake of our Savior and His reputation, to arrange as quickly as possible to take a polygraph test concerning these accusations. I know the results of such a test are not admissible in court, but this is the court of public judgment. I can only tell you if I were in your position and I were innocent of these allegations, I would insist on having a polygraph test administered as soon as possible.

Passing such a test would cause this metastasizing cancer on your candidacy and the damage it is doing to the Christian witness to evaporate instantaneously. There is no defense quite as effective as the truth, especially when it is accompanied by the demonstrable proof of the type a successful polygraph test would irrefutably provide.

  • Boreal

    Not admissible in court for a reason.

  • Alexodia

    Polygraphs are Pseudo-science at their very best. Results from them would prove nothing to me.

    • SkokieGuy [ChicagoAdjacentGuy]

      If we want to get heavy conspiracy theory, perhaps Moore has already been coached and taken and passed multiple tests? His campaign now confidently arranges for an apparently unconnected person to “demand” he take one. He does, prior to the election, passes, and this allows those torn between voting for a child molester or a Democrat to vote for Moore and save face.

      • Alexodia

        Anyone who votes for him based on the results of a Polygraph should not have graduated high school much less be allowed to vote.

        Polygraphs tell you nothing at all and are basically worthless paperweights. I’m weighted against him period and anyone who is swayed by a Polygraph test needs to have their head examined.

        • SkokieGuy [ChicagoAdjacentGuy]

          Of course, but as others have said, there are no doubt many Alabama voters who want to vote for him and need an excuse for cover. This will be enough.

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  • DesertSun59

    It’s a ruse. This evangelical charlatan knows it’s not going to happen. It’s also a way to put into people’s minds that Moore is actually innocent. Evangelicals are liars and grifters. Nothing they say can be taken at face value.

  • bkmn

    Roy has been lying for so long that he probably believes what he says, much like Trump

  • TrueWords

    If you believe that you did nothing wrong which Moore and his minions do…then you can pass a polygraph test…

    https://i.imgur.com/tIleBgD.gif

  • 2patricius2

    “Judge Moore, as a brother in Christ, I implore you, for the sake of your family and your supporters, but even more importantly, for the sake of our Savior and His reputation…”

    Oh, yes, Judge Moore……you are besmirching Jesus’ reputation…..

    • Robincho

      Seems like after being removed from office not once but twice, he would lose title to that “Judge” thang…

      • Steverino

        Judge not, Moore or lest…

    • crookedstr8

      Republichristians have been besmirching the reputation of Jesus for decades; it has now become openly repudiated among the populace because of their hypocritical support of Trump. The bad part is: THEY ARE MORE LIKE TRUMP THAN JESUS.

  • Harveyrabbit
    • safari

      Why is there a guy riding a mill… an that’s a… boar?

      • Harveyrabbit

        Dog works in mysterious ways. Everything is there for a very specific non-scientific reason.

      • The_Wretched

        Sow

        • Ragnar Lothbrok

          Lactating ,no less.

      • Paula

        Yes, its a sow from the early Pleistocene. I wonder how it got there.

        • William

          Witchcraft.

      • Ray Taylor

        And the horses look like skinny boars.

        • Bad Tom

          Or perhaps very large dogs.

      • William

        Back then, people had to make their own fun.

        • Paula

          I did not know that Mill Riding was a popular sport. back then.

          • William

            Thatch roof riding was a little prickly.

          • Bad Tom

            We said: “No Smoking!”

  • Robincho

    Richard “Dick” Land always seemed more like a bottom to me…

  • TrueWords

    Oh NOW you believe in science…

    • tonyg

      Pseudoscience.

  • Bambino

    If Roy Moore willing to review a 12 year old rape victim sex history, I don’t see why he can’t be subjected to have his entire history examine?

    • Zeldacat

      Cause he has delusions of being a Man ‘o Gawd. So she asked for it while he just says “Oops, sorry Jesus!” and is forgiven for being tempted by that little whore.

      You know. Or, in this case, insert the rapist in his place.

  • JT

    Polygraph a psychopath. LOL.

  • Tatonka

    Let’s just hook him up to this and be done with him. (Not that I give him credit for appreciating Beethoven. I bet he’s got every 8-track that Pat Boone ever released). https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/bed94f19475d0950b07a5fbd575607ad1f09ec625fd733cb57badde3faaaf7a9.jpg

    • Todd20036

      I don’t know if he’d be a better president, but at least he’d be a sexier one.

  • Tomcat

    Your savior’s reputation is already tainted by all you lunatic christians.

  • Lazycrockett
  • narutomania

    A polygraph test is not a magical spell that forces the speaker to tell the truth, nor does it reveal the truth.

    They are not admissible in court and would prove nothing in this case.

  • HZ81

    Would Jesus take a polygraph? NO!

  • The_Wretched

    I somehow expect that Moore, who excels at extreme nonesence with a calm flat demeanor, would “pass” any polygraph test.

  • Todd20036

    A calm person can “prove” he is an alien.
    A nervous person can “prove” he doesn’t love his mother.

    Polygraph tests can be useful, but hardly infallible.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    Polygraphs are stupid. There’s a reason it’s not admissible in a court.

    • Gustav2

      Voodoo economics and a whole host of nonsense makes the Republican Party fun!

      • (((GC)))

        The danger is in appointing federal judges, possibly including another Supreme Court justice or two, who buy into that nonsense.

        Senators do sometimes respond to pressure from constituents: they couldn’t pass a Rethuglican health (non)coverage bill.

        As long as we don’t know the extent of pResident* tRump’s collusion with Russia or his foreign and domestic conflicts of interest, 45* should not be allowed to make lifetime appointments. A few Democratic senators could withhold unanimous consent from routine Senate procedures, and slow things down dramatically if not shutting things down.

        Capitol switchboard: 202-224-3121
        Or find your senators’ contact info, including websites, at congress.gov or govtrack.us, among other places.

  • ben

    Unfortunately polygraph tests can be spoofed, and have a huge rate of false positives. Worthless

  • safari

    I was reading about the Witch’s Hammer — the book about the justification for there being witchcraft as a real thing and on par with heresy and how to torture people to get them to confess to it. Why aren’t Christians flocking to their older material in this matter?

    • Todd20036

      Shhh. DOn’t give them any ideas.

    • Harveyrabbit

      Nobody expects the Confederate Inquisition!

  • Gustav2

    Pathological liars pass polygraphs with ease. They actually believe their own shit.

    • Steverino

      Indeed. At best, a polygraph detects feelings of guilt, not lies. A pathological liar who feels no guilt will pass.

      • Alexodia

        And people with Anxiety disorders will always fail it.

        • Steverino

          Yep. I know I would, for that reason.

      • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

        I think you pass-fail based on how stress registers on the paper. Guilt can be stressful, or so I’ve heard.

        • Priya Lynn

          And, as mentioned above, for others guilt is not stressful or guilty people train themselves to pass the test.

          • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

            Yep. The Scientologists use a very crude “lie detector.” Ex-members say a pebble in your shoe will beat the e-meter. It’s just a Wheatstone Bridge dingus, but they use it inappropriately.

          • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

            Oh yeah. The Scientologists cheat on the e-meter with tricks like putting pebbles in their shoes.

    • Jon
    • Orly

      Especially fundamentalist people.

  • KarenAtFOH

    Ironic that a preacher considers God so weak that he needs Roy to prove himself innocent in order to preserve his reputation.

    • Longpole

      Ya, like where he says, by taking a poly test, it will cause the “Metastaszing cancer on your candidacy and damage to your Christian witness to evaporate instaneously” is he referring to some kind of exorcism ?

    • (((GC)))

      Even if an unmistakable thundering voice from the heavens intoned to all Americans simultaneously, in all of our native languages, “ROY’S RIGHT!!!”, his and his supporters’ immorality are still on clear display.

      I still wouldn’t vote for him.

      (And I’d look for a Clarke’s Third Law explanation for that voice. After all, the Vogons managed it.)

  • Beth Sanders
  • SkokieGuy [ChicagoAdjacentGuy]

    Yes, a polygraph test administered by attorneys with the Liberty Council perhaps? That will finally put these sordid allegations to bed…

  • Keith D Plane

    O/T we now have a 2 nd Franken accuser

  • Bambino

    Michael Jackson had his penis photo taken by the LAPD, perhaps Roy Moore victims could remember any distinctive mark that require him to submit to the same treatment.

    • Tomcat

      Did they give it back to Michael?

      • Tomcat

        That sucker will be sold on Ebay one day.

        • Lumpy Gaga

          Why do you think Peter Thiel wanted a herpes fix so quickly?

      • Bambino

        I don’t know. it’s probably a sealed record with iron clad rules around it should anyone in the law enforcement decided to leak the photo.

        • Tomcat

          Oh, you did not say photo before.

          • AmeriCanadian

            Magic!

          • Bambino

            Ha! I posted too quick.

  • William

    Cuz everyone knows there is no way to fool a polygraph.

  • Friday

    I think Moore’s too sociopathic for a polygraph. 🙂

  • crookedstr8

    Like Republichristians are above paying off the person who conducts the polygraph? Heck, their televangelists rob the ignorant so they can buy jets and a dozen mansions; they are resistant to feeding the poor; they are opposed to healing the sick through universal health care — and their prophets certainly aren’t performing any miraculous healings; they support candidates who worship money and assault women; they vehemently praise child molesters; many of them beat their children because they don’t want to spare the rod and spoil them; they molest their sisters and deem themselves holy……………..Hmmm..they sound like the most vile, wicked sinners since Sodom & Gomorrah…but they are Christians? No, a polygraph is not the answer. A different candidate is…

  • Paula

    Mr. Moore, the polygraph machine is ready for your test. Please have a seat.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/787162659eb77327be6ca88e463f8ce8bf73edac87cdf068ccec512868d0b6e3.jpg

    • Tomcat

      And hurry because Mueller needs it later.

    • Boreal

      I’ll turn off all the appliances in my house to make sure they can power it.

      • Bambino

        If need be I’ll drive over. They can drain the battery of my car. Anything for charity.

        • Treant

          Oh, yeah! I have an inverter and I’m willing to burn some gas for the cause.

      • Paula

        Is there time to bring an extra power plant or six online?

      • William

        My father grew up a couple miles from the state prison in Oklahoma where executions were carried out. When the lights flickered and dimmed, his mother would tell him that’s what will happen if you are bad.

        • JCF

          Horrible.

          • William

            His high school civics took a field trip to Death Row.

    • KarenAtFOH

      “There will be a momentary sense of discomfort.”

  • Cuberly Deux
    • Treant

      There is no Universe where I would consent to taking a polygraph test. Just like I wouldn’t consent to a voluntary DNA test (if I did one of the commercial ones, I’d give fake information).

      Of course, my blood pressure and heart rate are controlled by medication, so I don’t think the polygraph would be useful on me anyway.

    • Well if the polygraph is pseudo-science, I suggest we consult a phrenologist. Because I can tell from here that Moore has the forehead of a Welshman, and I think we all know what that means.

  • Cackalaquiano

    I look at nearly all these evangelical ministers and just wonder about their whole take on treating the body “like a temple of the Holy Spirit” thing.

    • safari

      The body is a prison for the soul, I’m told

      • Ben in Oakland

        The shoe is the prison of the sole

  • Galvestonian

    Scumsucker in charge Roy ‘kid-diddler’ Moore won’t do it or act like no one ever said anything like that. Waaaal, I would of taken such a test but it’s aginst my Biblical principles. It just ain’t in the Bible.

  • Joseph Miceli

    If it showed him to be guilty, would that make a difference to his followers?

  • Jon Doh

    If he passed it they would be all “well there ya go”. If he fails they will point out how unreliable polygraph test are.

    • Bambino

      I think that is the idea.

    • SFBruce

      Were Moore to fail a polygraph test, we’d never hear about it. Were he to pass one, of course, we’d hear about that, but not about the X number of tries it took to get there.

      Like every word out of this man’ s mouth, anything he tells us about a polygraph test can’t be trusted.

  • Bambino

    O/T Jeffrey Tambor leaving Transparent on harassment allegation.
    http://collider.com/jeffrey-tambor-exits-transparent/

    • Reality.Bites

      I’ve not yet seen seasons 3 and 4, so I don’t know how they’ll do this, but it’s a show about his character’s family. They can either kill her off or have her move away but she’d remain a primary focus.

  • Ben in Oakland

    I suspect that Land is far less concerned about the metastasizing cancer on Moore-is-less’s career and campaign than he is about the metastasizing cancer on Christianity.

    Of course, that kind of Christianity IS the cancer.

    • Tor

      There is no way fundamentalist Christianity is going to exit this period of time (the Trump administration) looking good, or being respected.

      • Ben in Oakland

        When you think god is your very BBBF, you have all the self regard you need.

    • Longpole

      I though we already went thru this crap back in the late 1980’s when Jimmy swaggart got caught with a prostitute while jimmy bakker was indicted on mail fraud, conspiracy and raped his secretary.

      • Ben in Oakland

        There is no end to the cancer of conservative Christianity. They will always claim canons are cannons.

  • Benny S.

    “…the damage it is doing to the Christian witness….”

    Richard Land is definitely an expert on the topic of damaging the Christian witness. Along with Jerry Falwell Jr., Franklin Graham, Tony Perkins, etc.

  • coram nobis

    You can get ol’ Roy to go to the test. Just tell him that Polly Graf is under 14.

  • Reality.Bites

    It’s not a lie if you believe it – George Costanza.

  • Pizza009

    Polygraphs aren’t reliable

    • Natty Enquirer

      Neither are pastors or the people they hire.

      • Pizza009

        True story

  • Gene Perry

    If he passes the test then he’ll say, Hey, here’s proof. & if he fails the test, then he’ll say that the test is faulty. Catch 22.

  • Kevin Andrews

    There is nothing truer than this “Brother in Christ” predatory pedophilia. These hypocrites all fornicate on Friday and pay their “sins” away on Sunday. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6e3f4eac1129eca655d024b01d7d920daefdd5bc3c5b847de9543455eb50fc8a.png

  • The_Wretched

    “for the sake of our Savior and His reputation”

    The evangelicals think Moore makes Jesus look bad?

  • TheManicMechanic

    People that are conditioned to lie with impunity like evangelicals do can often pass polygraph tests because in their minds, they honestly believe their untruths, and have done them for so long, it’s their natural state. Few people can lie with such ease as those who believe they are doing it for gawd.

  • -M-

    The reason polygraphs are inadmissible is because they aren’t irrefutable proof.

    • -M-

      What he needs to do is answer the charges in public with something other than lies, attacks, or deflection.

  • SFBruce

    “I hope and pray that these allegations against you are false.”

    In other words, I sincerely hope the several women accusing Moore of improprieties are liars and cheats, and that the fact that Moore has avoided any real effort to explain these despicable claims is just because he’s not very smart. That’s the truth this Christian man longs for. The religious affiliation of Moore’s accusers hasn’t been revealed as far as I know, but at least some are Republicans and they’re all Alabamians, so chances are at least some of them are Christian, and may actually value the truth.

  • Andymac3

    If this is level of proof the Evangelicals are asking, then we could try him as a witch, throw him in the water with his hands tied, if he floats, he’s guilty, if he sinks, he’s innocent.

  • Lizard

    “Passing such a test would cause this metastasizing cancer on your candidacy and the damage it is doing to the Christian witness to evaporate instantaneously.”

    No it wouldn’t, because polygraphs don’t work. Dumbass.

  • Clive Johnson
  • AdamTh

    Typical chrissie talking out of both sides of his mouth. Admits a polygraph is not admissable in court, then calls it “irrefutable”.

  • infmom

    Waste of time. That festering cowflop sincerely believes his side of the story.

  • Steven B

    Evangelical pastor: “You show ‘em Roy!! Take a polygraph and show ‘em you’re tellin’ the truth.”
    Roy Moore:
    https://youtu.be/K8E_zMLCRNg

  • lovelydestruction

    Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! Right after he sues his accusers.