Kim Jong Un: Deranged Trump Insulted Me In Front Of The World And Will Pay Dearly For His Rudeness

The Associated Press reports:

North Korea state news agency: Kim Jong Un calls Trump “deranged,” says he will “pay dearly” for his threats. The announcement from the news agency comes after North Korea’s foreign minister mad a comment, “the sound of a dog barking” in regards to President Donald Trump’s threat to destroy his country.

The comments are the North’s first response to Trump’s speech at the U.N. General Assembly on Tuesday, during which he vowed to “totally destroy North Korea” if provoked. Trump also called North Korean leader Kim Jong Un “Rocket man.”

  • TexasBoy

    One crazy guy calling another crazy guy “crazy” while holding the world’s peace hostage.

  • bkmn
    • JT

      Shouldn’t they be using micrometers?

      • Ron Robertson

        I think you mean nanometers.

    • kelven

      Moobs and tiny hands. Perfect.

    • JackFknTwist

      That’s not their egos dear !

    • BearEyes

      I have a song going through my head with a chorus of
      .. and they’re all made of ticky-tacky

      • marshlc

        And they all look just the same….

    • RJ Bone

      Tape and yardsticks?

      Screw that. Calipers πŸ˜›

      • David L. Caster

        Micrometers.

    • LatrinaDiBucca

      “Donald! You’ve been workin’ out!”

    • Librarykid

      Brain Bleach Needed STAT!

  • Denis

    Well he’s not wrong….

  • Tawreos

    I am sure that the Toddler in Chief will handle this with dignity and grace….maybe I started drinking to early.

  • barrixines

    Somebody should tell him Trump won’t read that unless he puts it in bullet points and add pictures.

    • JW Swift

      Sure he will. It includes Trump’s name the requisite number of times.

  • Dramphooey

    Such a thin skin, Kim! It’s not like a woman laughed while you were testifying, which is a true high crime and deserves the death penalty.

  • Jeffrey

    If he only meant Trump I’d be ok with this

  • Nychta

    Kim needs to get a Twitter account so he and Trump can can engage in Twitter wars and the rest of us can just go about our business.

  • barrixines
  • Jeffrey

    Sometimes you just need a palate cleanser. Here’s Ben Cohen’s thighs. How long do you think you could spend down there? https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9fb83d795ac08e1eb9c489540ef404b6c754579529a0e6167f61b68caf428606.jpg

    • JT

      He should be wearing a singlet with a zipper all the way down.

    • JackFknTwist

      Now that perks me up !

    • TampaDink

      How long I think that I could spend between his thighs is severely limited, in that the challenge wasn’t posed to me when I was much younger. At 54, I can sadly admit that it would not be as much time as I’d like.

      • AJ Drew

        Does falling asleep, using them as pillows, count?

        • TampaDink

          It would have to for me.

      • Ben in Oakland

        You children, complaining about being 54. I’d give anything to be 54 again.

        • TampaDink

          I didn’t mean to sound as if I am bitter about being 54, I’m constantly surprised that I’m still alive based on a lifetime of significant health issues that began before I was born. I’d love to have the body & energy of the average 54 yr. old & wish that I had been able to remain in the workforce beyond the age of 36. Even so, every day when I wake up alive, I’m a little bit surprised.

          • Ben in Oakland

            I didn’t take it as bitterness. I hear younger people than me–67– complaining about getting older so much. As you noted, just be thank full that you’re alive. You get three choices: getting older well, getting older badly, or not getting older at all.

          • TampaDink

            I am thankful to be alive….my brother just turned 62, the longest living man in my family for 3 generations. Mom just turned 87 and having seen how devastated she was (as any parent would naturally be) after the death of my oldest brother 17 yrs. ago, even though my health was far less stable than it is now, I made a vow to myself. You’ve got one job to do….outlive mom. In spite of all of the health issues I have, I’d like to believe that of your 3 choices, I am getting older well. Or…well, I’m getting older.

          • Ben in Oakland

            The best advice I can give you: eat the right kind of foods, avoiding animal fats as much as you can. Keep moving– staying physically active is key. Avoid stress– it’s killer.

            I had a very unfortunate Surgery five years ago. It totally changed my life. I ended up with a heart condition, and I’m the last person on the planet that I ever thought would have a heart condition. Even with it, I can still manage to run six minute miles on a cross trainer. I weight ten pounds more than I did in college.

            I follow my own advice. I wish I could get my friends to.

          • TampaDink

            In the wake of my 2nd open heart surgery (mitral valve replacement, twice in 6 months), I developed severe trouble with arrhythmia. It is currently in check…after a 4th and finally successful ablation. I just had my routine 6 mo. check up with my cardiologist on Monday…he took me off of my cholesterol drug for the first time in almost 20 years. My weight is down to 139 from an (all time) high of 55…and my b.p. was 120/57. I eat as carefully as I can…since irritable bowel disease is also one of my features. My exercise ability is limited to walking, which I do almost every day.

          • Ben in Oakland

            These are all good things to do. My cardiologist said that my ability to do six minute miles is probably what will give me a nice old age despite the arrhythmia caused by the surgery.

            Cholesterol drugs are extremely iffy in any case. Half of the people who get heart attacks don’t have high cholesterol. And half the people who have high cholesterol don’t have heart attacks. My own experience with statins has convinced me never to take them again. In April, I was in agony, very nearly paralyzed with pain. All brought on by Lipitor. I got through it, and am basically back to normal again, but that was in doubt for a while.

          • TampaDink

            I was lucky enough to have not experienced any side effects from Zocor….but I’ve known several people who experienced things like you did from taking statins. Glad that your body has improved & that your ticker isn’t slowing you down.

    • BearEyes

      more than I have calendars

    • RJ Bone

      Ye gods, he could crush a oil drum with those!

      • Phillip in L.A.

        And I wouldn’t mind seeing him try it!

      • Richard, another Canuck

        I’ll play the part of the oil drum…

    • BJORN RAGNVALDR

      Until I withdrew his essence.

      • Phillip in L.A.

        Potayto, potah-to.

    • Galvestonian

      Forever !

    • Phillip in L.A.

      A lifetime

    • Jeffrey
    • JW Swift

      Can we finish the experiment with him curling-up with his head on my lap while I stroke him like a puppy?

  • OdieDenCO

    damn! when the king of crazy calls someone crazy you got to believe it. can we get a mental eval for donny? STAT!

  • BeaverTales

    I’ve been trying to perfect the Kim Jung Un taco: tiny barbecued shrimp, shredded kim chee and napa cabbage topping, sour pickled daikon or carrot, sriracha yogurt aioli, lime peel on a moo shu pancake.

    The Trump cocktail I invented is a orange mango slurry on a float on a white russian creme: hazelnut vodka, vanilla extract on ice and mint.

    They go horribly together, but the taco is actually better than the cocktail.

    • kelven

      The cocktail actually sounds delicious. I would suggest you need to pee in it to accurately capture his personality.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      Im coming to your house for the end of tbe world party

  • Rebecca Gardner
  • bambinoitaliano
    • Crazy Russian

      Cat Jitsu: Reverse guard.

      • RJ Bone

        Secret Technique, Cat Style! Stare-At-My-Balls no jutsu!

    • Miji

      This move would make sense if it was a skunk, but I fail to grasp what his game plan is now that he’s upside down, with his ass in the air.

      • Nowhereman

        I think he’s wondering what the heck his next move should be, too!

      • RaygunsGoZap

        Don’t act like you don’t know

        • gothambear

          Thank you! I was waiting…

      • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

        Powerful hind leg inverted kick to face!

    • Nowhereman

      Now that’s a new one!

    • AJ Drew

      Ah, the old “when in doubt, freak them out” defensive strategy.

    • BearEyes

      damn – I nearly did a spit-take with my vodka on that one

  • fastlanestranger

    I wish these two would just f**k and get it over with.

  • Ben in Oakland

    What are you going to do? slap him with your jowls?

  • JT

    IL Kook from Korea says what?

  • SoCalGal20

    My work is basically a stone’s throw away from Miramar (ok, a couple of miles away) and the fighter jets have been VERY busy today. Not sure if it’s coincidence or not. In fact, some were flying by as I was typing this.

    • stuckinthewoods
      • SoCalGal20

        Haha you’re right. Showshow much I pay attention lol. The big air show at Miramar is this weekend!

    • TuuxKabin

      Duck and cover. Place in hot 500 degree oven. Enjoy. Like stuckinthewoods says, maybe it’s just an air show . . . on a Thirstday . . . ?

      • ColdCountry

        Or maybe they are as nervous as we are.

      • SoCalGal20

        The big Miramar Air Show is this weekend. So, yes, that’s what’s going on lol.

      • David L. Caster

        Practicing and ferrying a few of the media up with them. It’s been on the local news this afternoon and evening. Another bud reported that they were buzzing a construction site where he was working today.

    • danolgb

      That’s actually just practice for the air show this weekend. You’re good.

      • SoCalGal20

        Good to know!

        • danolgb

          I’m in South OC, so if they hit Pendleton, we’re both out.

    • it’s its

      I’m in Clairemont – I think it’s the Blue Angels

      • SoCalGal20

        Thanks! Is there an air show this weekend?

      • SoCalGal20

        Yes, I see there’s the big Miramar Air Show this weekend.

      • Librarykid

        I have family in your area, one of whom is a Professor of Biology at Pomona College. Good Brains.

        • it’s its

          You’re probably referring to Claremont, California. I live in the San Diego suburb of “Clairemont” (no brains).

  • Crazy Russian

    It’s really sad and alarming when North Korean dictator sounds more eloquent and composed than US president.

    • OdieDenCO

      that bar is pretty damn low

      • Crazy Russian

        I mean, we used to have an educated, intelligent man in charge less than a year ago. Who fucked with the settings?

        • BudClark

          BIG MONEY.

          PERIOD.

          • David L. Caster

            That fed bots and several large right-wing propaganda machines.

          • Harley

            And Russia

          • David L. Caster

            One and the same if you ask me.

    • ColdCountry

      In a language that isn’t his own. At least he didn’t go to school in Nambia.

      • Kim went to college in Switzerland…..

        • motordog

          Stop making up countries!

        • Librarykid

          What a shame he:
          A, did not learn any humanitarian values OR
          B, fall off a mountain.

          • SilasMarner

            I vote for “falling off a mountain”.

      • ElinorDRoberts

        Google is paying 97$ per hour,with weekly payouts.You can also avail this.
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      • Librarykid

        45 did not have to insult him in front of the world; he, like 45 is an insult in front of the world or a shanda before the goyim.

      • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

        Is it weird that I tried to email a friend about this and typed ‘Namibia’ twice before achieving Nambia?

        • ColdCountry

          Paging Dr. Freud….

          ETA: Ooooh, I need Dr. Freud, I read that as “Nambla.”

          • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

            O my….

      • CarmenSKirkman

        Google is paying 97$ per hour,with weekly payouts.You can also avail this.
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  • Damnation! I never thought I’d agree with anything that Kim Jong Un said. But hellz a poppin agree with him I do. “unprecedented rude nonsense one has never heard from any of his predecessors.”

    • ColdCountry

      Would that someone could pull him aside and tell him, “Listen, just ignore the ass the way we do. He should be gone soon.”

    • LaChatSayWha

      Yeah, his statement is surprisingly reasonable. And accurate.

      What’s bad is that he sounds fairly logical and rational compared not just to the illiterate dotard, but most of the GOP. Not to mention most (all?) of right wing media in the US.

  • margaretpoa

    Great. Fat, ego maniacal Asian guy with nukes meets fat, ego maniacal orange guy with nukes.
    We’re so fucked.

    • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

      The whole nation sits back passively and watches the freak show…

  • Miji

    Let them both put their money where their mouth is. Let’s put Donald in a dinghy half way between Korea and Guam and we’ll see just how accurate those rockets are. Conventional explosives only.

  • Adam Stevens

    Rocket Man -vs- Pussy Grabber?

    It’s real life Lucha Libre!!!

  • Nowhereman

    Oh please please please lock Kim and Donnie in a padded room together!! Please please please!

    • RJ Bone

      Combs and no hairspray at fifteen yards πŸ˜›

  • Ross

    Kim Jong Un calls Trump β€œderanged”

    Well…yes.

    Says he will β€œpay dearly” for his threats.

    Oh…please, yes.

    And, Kim? 80% of America did not vote for the deranged baby. Can you leave us out of all this? Thank you.

    • Kim knows how to target precisely: remember his brother?

    • Librarykid

      “deranged” is a connoisseur’s opinion.

  • TampaDink

    What Kim is unaware of is that hair furor is notorious for not paying his debts…making him pay dearly seems unlikely. What is (frighteningly) more likely is that he will make the people of N. & S. Korea pay with their lives.

    • JWC

      I would sincerely hope wee Kimmy sends a ninja troupe

      • TampaDink

        That works for me, as long as they only take out the right people.

        • JWC

          Very selective

  • infmom

    Wow, look at those two babies waggliing their weenies at each other.

  • shellback

    Kimmy, honey. Our country didn’t insult you, trump did. Attack him, mercilessly, not us.

    • J Ascher

      Trump, unfortunately, is the American head of state and, as such, he officially represents the country. We are so screwed!

  • ColdCountry

    the world is off its axis – I agree with Kim Jong Un.

    “I am now thinking hard about what response he could have expected when he allowed such eccentric words to trip off his tongue.” You and me both.

    • Librarykid

      Kim, I would practice looking up frequently and ducking quickly, although with your girth, it might just be easier to fall over.

  • Halou

    A surprisingly restrained statement from North Korea almost as if Trump is giving them what they want, validation and a reason to justify their oppressive rule.

  • AJ Drew

    Well, props to the translator. “Dotard” is a word that sounds exactly like what it means, and it’s used twice! (I wonder what the original word was.)

    • rickhfx

      noun

      an old person, especially one who has become weak or senile.

    • Ben in Oakland

      Poopoo pAnts,

  • JWC

    My old man can beat up your old man “No he can’t ” “Yes he can” “No he can’t” “Yes he can”….

    • RJ Bone

      –Oh yeah, well MINE is the Respected Supreme Leader of the DPRK!

      **Well MINE is God-Emperor!

      –MINE was born on a mountain and can castrate a housefly with a broadsword without killing it!

      **MINE has his own book!

      –MINE has super telepathic basketball powers! And hit perfect bullseyes with an assault rifle from a ridiculous range without practicing EVER at five years old!

      **MINE HAS ELECTRICITY AND WORKING PLUMBING!

      –Ohhhh, NOW IT’S ON BITCH!

      • JWC

        Now children behave

        • RJ Bone

          But but but I WANNA BLOW STUFF UUUUUP! AND HE’S A MEANY PANNNNTS! *starts stomping the ground in a circle, waving hands wildly*

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    “Two petulant, puerile, pompous, pampers wearing pustules enter, none leave”

    One can dream.

  • dcurlee

    And the games begin

  • RJ Bone

    Okay, Kimmy, just so know you know? This isn’t a pissing contest. Both of you would lose to a flea.

    That said… HE’S deranged?!?!!

  • fuzzybits
  • dcurlee

    Please let Kim give coordinates so Trump voters can be on the front line to protest his bombing

    • Ann Kah

      We are ALL on the front line.

  • Paul

    This musical number from last night’s South Park episode is spot-on:

    https://twitter.com/xCefi/status/911013436200570880

    #PutItDown

  • Stogiebear
    • Librarykid

      This could be cute as long as there was no barking.

  • boobert

    I really expected him to be wearing “rocket Man ” shirt or something. I have to admit kim won the insult game with “dotard” ! lol

  • SammySeattle

    Sorry about their penises.

  • Ken M
    • David L. Caster

      Blah blah blah….

  • Dale Snyder

    One fat-assed malignant narcissist against another fat-assed malignant narcissist.

    What good could come of this?

    • Ben in Oakland

      A two for one sale at Fat Asses R us?

  • John Calendo

    #dotard is trending.

    • -M-

      πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

  • Ann Kah

    Is anybody surprised? Our idiot with nukes has unwisely been issuing childish taunts to their idiot with nukes.

  • Galvestonian

    Shit or get off the toilet !

  • MassageBear
    • jmax

      Trumpo the Clown’s hands are too big.

  • The Professor

    So I am no fan of Trump, but really Kim? Trump’s in a political corner with a Mueller noose tightening and won’t think twice about bombing you and millions of innocent people into dust. Seriously. Get real.

  • The_Wretched

    I sort of would love the letter under different circumstances. Unhinged unstable Umans with nukes make it a different thing.

  • LatrinaDiBucca

    Oh, fuck. ‘Dotard’ is a nice flourish and all, but seriously…this dude needs to step up his trash talk game.

    • Ben in Oakland

      I love the last line. It’s so medieval. It shows that Parisian education wasn’t entirely wasted.

  • 2guysnamedjoe

    Why do they both speak and write like outer-space archvillains from a bad 1950s sci-fi flick?

  • Nick in Pasadena

    Two childish, egotistical megalomaniacs face off against one another and the whole world is caught in the cross-hairs. Thanks a heap, U.S. voters.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      Dont worry. California and hawaii and guam will be a nuclear hellscape but bernie will still be pushing single payer…..

      • Artsy

        I live in CA. I told some family members if he gets us killed I will come back and haunt them.

  • motordog

    They’re both horrible, of course…but I think I’m going to steal ‘dotard’ when referring to the Orange One.

  • -M-

    Ignore him, Kimmie. He’s more out of touch and irrelevant than you are.

  • fkevin

    Here we are waiting while the Fat Man and the Fat Boy insult each other until they go off.

    • mary barnes

      and drop Fat Boy again?

  • another_steve

    May I have, like, six hours advance notice before the final nuclear conflagration?

    I have to water the houseplants, plus there’s a nice steak in the freezer that my man and I would like to finish first.

    • mary barnes

      funny. Speaks well of we humans. ha ha

  • mark99k

    OK, who else had to google the word ‘dotard’?

    Sad to realize the world might very well end because of the petulance and immaturity of two of its least-loved inhabitants.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      Whats it mean? Im too lazy

      • edrex

        it means kim is more literate than donald.

      • mark99k

        A person who is in his or her dotage. πŸ™‚

        Go ahead now, type the letters in the nice search box….

        • Tiger Quinn

          I wouldn’t have to you condescending ass, I have a vocabulary. A lot of people do. Get the dowager out of your ass.

          • mark99k

            Jeez. Some people can’t recognize a joke if it’s painted on their dicks. It wasn’t even a response to you. Try the decaf.

    • mary barnes

      I didn’t google, but just got the gist of it. Now I’ll look it up.;)

  • DaveMiller135

    I’m pretty sure J. Robert Oppenheimer was picturing a pair of world leaders with atomic bombs, both posturing like pouty little children, when he tried to uninvent the atomic bomb.

  • DaMoldBrok

    My respect for Kim Jon Un went up a half notch or so, he used a word that Drump would not comprehend, he called Drump “dotard”.

    Yes, I had to look it up, ‘an old person, especially one who has become weak or senile.’

    And yes, I had a good laugh and gave Kim 2 snaps

  • Edmund Allin

    What is the house of Trump but a gilded barn where brigands drink in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor?

    • Daveed_WOW

      That was poetry. Unattributed, but poetry nonetheless.

      • Edmund Allin

        It was my first encounter with “dotard”… πŸ™‚ I’m surprised no-one else picked up the reference. Or maybe they thought it inappropriate. But, yes.

    • mary barnes

      Sounds Shakespearean.

  • Jeffg166

    I haven’t bathed in radiation since the test ban went into effect in the 60’s.

  • chris james

    My, my….our Dotard in Chief has really done it now. Imagine any national leader threatening to destroy another nation….wait…Rocket Man Kim does it all the time. Whew, we’re safe. Is Trump learning his diplomacy from Kim?

  • TimJ

    Who’d have thought that Lil Kim was better at throwing shade than Trump? Hilarious.

  • Grumpys cats Best Friend

    Two school yard bullies.

  • pete

    wow, kim jong un beating the dotard at the name-calling game!

    • mary barnes

      It scares me because while the insults to Trump don’t concern him for long as he throws poop right back. But, Asians, would rather die than be insulted. And Kim Jong is not the real leader. That would be his dear leader grandpa who is dead, but has become a god. I don’t think Trump would lay down his life for god. But Kim Jong might. I’m just hoping he is a true coward.

  • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

    Dude, El Chapo threatened the same thing, and we’re still waiting. What makes you think you can do any better?

  • Artsy

    doΒ·tard
    ˈdōdΙ™rd/Submit
    noun
    an old person, especially one who has become weak or senile.

    • Artsy

      And I can think of another word that rhymes with this.