Hope Hicks Named To The Mooch’s Former Post

The Hill reports:

Hope Hicks, a longtime aide to President Trump, will become the new White House communications director, NBC News reported on air early Tuesday. Hicks, who is Trump’s director of strategic communications, had been appointed last month to serve as interim White House communications director after the firing of Anthony Scaramucci. Unlike other Trump aides, Hicks does not appear on cable news representing the president.

Last week it was reported that Hicks has lawyered up in the Russia probe.

  • Karl Dubhe

    Isn’t she supposed to be wearing a blue dress?

  • netxtown

    block your pussy, honey. donnie is in town.

    • Vira

      And by “in town” you mean……

  • BeaverTales

    I would have preferred Ivanka.

  • worstcultever

    The bus she’s gonna be thrown under just pulled out of the station.

  • Ernest Endevor

    Excellent choice.

  • Talisman

    For someone who has a lot of communications people surrounding him, the dumpster is singularly unable to communicate effectively.

    Unless it’s in dog whistles.

  • Ken M

    Hicks, chicks, dicks…Here we go again : ) So many rhyming words, the headlines and latenighters will be eating her alive.

  • Stogiebear
  • Kruhn

    Okay JMG’ers over/under on how long Hope Hicks lasts in her posts. I say three months.

    Any takers?

    • another_steve

      She’ll be caught tweeting pics of her genitals to senior White House aides, and it’ll be all over.

      The experience will provide her with the experience required to be a Fox News commentator though.

    • Rex

      4 Scaramuccis.

      • another_steve

        Sounds like Mahjongg.

      • Stogiebear

        So, November 6th.

  • barrixines

    Hope Hicks Gropes Dicks.

    • RoverSerton

      Frank Burns eats worms. They write themselves.

      • Nowhereman

        This whole administration is like Junior High.

  • j.martindale

    And she no doubt has a very impressive resume.

    • barrixines

      Indeed – she shaves it daily.

  • Tawreos

    Did she get the job because her name reminds Trump of the demographic he has great success in reaching?

  • another_steve

    But she’s not blond.

    I don’t get it.

    • OdieDenCO

      donny’s outreach program. he is an equal opportunist PG-er

      • another_steve

        “I have the best pussies. I could grab them on the middle of 5th Avenue in Manhattan and not one would complain.”

    • Rex

      It’s called diversity.

    • bambinoitaliano

      It’s part of the shit gibbon affirmative action initiative.

      • another_steve

        Ah. I see.

        Give brunette pussy a chance.

        • KayDThomas

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          • another_steve

            ^^ And what does that have to do with pussy?

          • barrixines

            Even your tits look like spam.

          • Nowhereman

            I don’t even need to read it and you made me laugh. Did she just buy a Land Rover?

    • Adam Schmidt

      Isn’t this the woman that there were rumors swirling about just a few weeks ago that she was having an affair with Donald?

      • The_Wretched

        That’s her.

      • Nowhereman

        I hope it’s true and that is why he he hired her. More grist for Mueller’s mill.

    • Snarkaholic

      ANY port in a storm!

    • David Walker

      BBC has an article on successful women. Their example is an executive who says she dies her (blonde) hair brown and wears loose clothing so she’ll be taken seriously. Sadly, she’s probably right.

      • Nowhereman

        Women have come a “long way, baby” not. In a lot of ways it is worse today because we should be so much better than that now.

  • shellback

    I am absolutely flummoxed by any woman who supports that FUCKING NAZI.

    • bambinoitaliano

      Not just woman. Human. Our moral compass varies from zero to insanity.

  • Todd20036

    Any woman who works for Trump at this point, deserves whatever they get, whether it be an indictment or even a physical assault.

  • greenmanTN

    There once was a woman named Hope
    Hired to speak for the dope
    It didn’t take a week
    For a lawyer her to seek
    Since treason can end with a rope

    • edrex

      there once was a woman named hicks
      who was hired by a cabinet of pricks
      to peddle the lies
      of white men in bad ties
      and occasionally to suck all their dicks.

      • greenmanTN

        Good one! 😁

        I started out with hicks but didn’t come up with much.

        • edrex

          henceforth, i think i shall begin every day by composing a dirty limerick.

          • greenmanTN

            Limericks and haiku are the extent of my poetic nature, and half the time I miscount the syllables in haikus! 😩

          • (((GC)))

            A classic:

            The limerick packs laughs anatomical
            Into space that is quite economical.
            But the good ones I’ve seen
            So seldom are clean
            And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

    • Robincho

      There once was a woman named Hicks —
      Another of shitgibbon’s tricks.
      Bob Mueller will take her
      And shake her and break her
      In ten…nine…eight…seven…six.

  • Anastasia Beaverhousen

    How’s that Hope and change working out for ya?

    • edrex

      that’s funny.

    • That_Looks_Delicious


  • dcurlee

    I’m sure he hired her for her expertise

  • Adam King

    I hope hicks stop ruining this country.

    • David Walker

      Had a friend who was executive secretary. She always called me Walker Dave because that’s how I was in her file. In this case, Hicks Hope. They did last November, anyway.

  • worstcultever

    Pretty sick and tragic how she thinks Dirty Old Dumpy considers her an actual human being. When actually Dirty Old Dumpy considers her a 100% disposable pretty face, set of tits, tight young ass, existing only to reflect his virile youthful masculine awesomeness back upon himself. He must be so tired of that saggy, pouty, demanding Melania. And things just aren’t the same with Ivanka anymore.

  • Dagoril

    What do you do when you run out of bottom of the barrel to scrape? You draft Hope Hicks for a job!

    The next vacancies will be filled by former baggers from the Cracker Barrel that Drumpf happened to meet.

    • Mikey

      in Trump’s case, when you scrape the bottom of the barrel, it’s safe to assume that there are warehouses FULL of more and more barrels he can scrape from.

    • Vira

      You turn the barrel over, and scrape the outside bottom. Welcome, Hope!

    • Or hire more golf caddy’s to fill jobs.

  • Leo
    • Nowhereman

      “All the best people…”

    • That_Looks_Delicious

      That’s the rumor I’ve seen most often online. Either way, both Drumpf and Lewandowski are married, and not to her.

      (Although another online rumor is that Donald and Melania were getting ready to divorce and already had the papers drawn up before he -surprise- started winning primaries and so Melania was persuaded to postpone.)

      • Helen Damnation™

        The online rumor is indeed plausible, with her livid facial expressions every time you see them together.

  • Ken M
    • Vira

      Slanders looks like 12 lbs of bacon grease stuffed in a 1-lb bag.

    • Menergy

      OMG slut appeared in public without sleeves on that top (photo #!) — and I love photo #3 with Slanders pushed to the back and frowning…..:) Where’s the outrage???? /s

      • jmax

        I saw pic #3 and my first thought was, “LOOK OUT HOPE! IT’S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!!”

    • kareemachan

      OMG, photo #2, both conjob and fuckabee are looking daggers at her.

    • The_Wretched

      Every new Bannon pic i see, i ask myself, does he look like a corpse? 100% yes so far.

    • Dagoril

      I knew it. Kellyanne DOES look good in orange!

    • ultragreen

      2nd photo: Probably not wise of her to stand so close to Steve Bannon.

    • JCF

      Yikes! Just like w/ KellyAnne—a Drumpf gig ages you (the inauguration pic: looks like 28 going on 48).

  • jayjonson

    The bimbo is only 20. How can she be a “long-time aide”? Unless . . . .

    • Ken M

      She’s 28. You’re probably quite right regarding the “unless” though. : )

    • Vira

      Edit: She’s a long-time “marital aide”.

  • Vira

    She could use just a little more makeup.

    Her name plus a comma defined 2016: “Hope, Hicks!”

  • You poor young lady, don’t you know that by accepting it you’re dooming yourself to be dropped in a month?

    • Mits

      Let’s try to stay positive for the good of the country.

      • Oh, it’s that one troll who was pretending to be Baby_Raptor. You’re scum, go die in a fire.

        • Mits

          Wow. What planet are you on?

          • Yeah, Joe’s not gonna punish me at the behest of a fraudulent antismetic troll pretending to be someone they’re not.

          • Mits

            I hope Joe gets you the help you so desperately need.

          • Nobody’s buying it, troll. The actual Mits has been informed of your impersonation.

          • Mits

            Take your pills. All of them. Everyday. You’ll get better.

    • Mits

      I hope we can put this ugliness behind us.

    • JCF

      I swear, I just read “dropped in the mouth”. ;-X

      • Ha.

        • Mits

          You should share some of your thoughts on race relations with JCF.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    I wonder if the rumors are true that she’s sleeping with Hair Furor. He calls her “Hopester.”

    • edrex

      abandon hope all ye who enter.

      • Dagoril

        “Look upon my Aide, ye humanoids, and despair!”

      • JCF

        He who (allegedly, if possible) enters will abandon Hope…

    • If so, then she has zero self respect to want to lay down with cheetolini “power”

      • Dagoril

        Well according to Suzanne Pleshette while channeling Leona Helmsley, powerful and wealthy is sexier than young and good-looking. /shrug

        • I must be power and wealth immune then, cause a hot man with a good heart is mega sexy to me.

  • kareemachan

    “Strategic communications”? Is THAT what his tweeting is called?

  • iambu

    What does “longtime aide” even mean, though??

    • Dagoril

      I’m assuming it involves her peeing on him repeatedly over a several year period.

      • iambu

        There goes breakfast…

  • Lee Grupsmith-Pedersen

    How long will she last? Ladies and gentlemen, place your bets!

  • Manny Espinola

    Oh thank god, much much easier on the eyes than Kellyanne

    • trouble94114

      “not completely unfortunate looking”

  • Gene Perry

    An on-line bio describes her as “a model, actress, and lacrosse player as a child, before getting her English degree at Southern Methodist University.” My hunch: she got hired more on the model/actress part of her resume than the English degree.

    • alguien

      my guess is she’s been willing to sit on his lap while taking dictation.

  • KP

    What’s up with the raccoon eye make up?

  • Canadian Observer

    I didn’t realize the WH had hired Stan Lee to name their new hires.

  • goofy_joe

    Why would you jump ON a burning ship?

  • Nowhereman

    Funny how he has time to rearrange the deck chairs on the Trumptanic and put on “reelection” rallies, but doesn’t have the time to actually staff the government. We have no Ambassador to South Korea, but we do have one to the Vatican. WORST SO-CALLED PRESIDENT EVER!

  • June Gordon

    I keep reading rumors that she is Trump’s Monica Lewinsky.

  • Josh Shapiro

    Longtime, how is she longtime anything, she’s 28 years old? This oughta be fun! Can’t wait to hear this bimbo speak!

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    “Hope Hicks, a longtime Blowjob Barbie to President Trump”

    There, fixed it.

  • Chris Lion

    Isn’t she the one he’s having an affair with…? (Allegedly)

  • Helen Damnation™