Alex Jones Guest: Children Are Being Kidnapped And Sent On Spaceships To Slave Colonies On Mars [VIDEO]

Trump watches this insanity.

Media Matters has the transcript:

ROBERT DAVID STEELE: This may strike your listeners as way out but we actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20 year ride. So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony. There’s all kinds of —

ALEX JONES (HOST): Look, I know that 90 percent of the NASA missions are secret and I’ve been told by high level NASA engineers that you have no idea, there is so much stuff going on. But then it goes off into all that, that’s the kind of thing media jumps on. But I know this: we see a bunch of mechanical wreckage on Mars and people say, “Oh look, it looks like mechanics.” They go, “Oh, you’re a conspiracy theorist.” Clearly they don’t want us looking into what is happening. Every time probes go over they turn them off. Well I don’t know about Mars bases, but I know they’ve created massive, thousands of different types of chimeras that are alien lifeforms on this earth now.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    This whack-job has White House Press access. How does anyone take this level of batshitery seriously?

    OT but San Francisco real estate has finally reached a new level of insanity.
    House Sadness: Dolores Heights Teardown With No Interior Photos Hits Market For $7 Million
    http://sfist.com/2017/06/29/house_sadness_dolores_heights_teard.php

    • Michael R

      The only city I miss of all the places I lived
      ( me at 20 in 1982 )
      .. but I no can afford .

    • bambinoitaliano

      Wait till you hear about the invisible bridge they are selling just a few blocks down.

    • Kate

      Real estate in desirable areas does that. Now that progressively smaller portions of America are in areas where our representatives are sane, thoughtful human beings who believe in facts and investing in the future? It’s only going to get more competitive to live Blue.

      • Rebecca Gardner

        So true. I am in a very fortunate situation. I live in a rent controlled building in San Francisco. So I am not leaving because I could not afford to live here and I make a lot of money.

        The only bad part is I have to put up with this horrible horrible view. LOL.
        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/40a29ddbc61e86805364aef0d8e7173b1d8ece9850742a3fc59c3d5803a9b8f6.jpg

        • Kate

          How do you cope? Looks truly lovely. We’re in the middle of a move ourselves to another area that’s rapidly climbing the price curve: Seattle.

    • KarenAtFOH

      That makes the dirt in the yard more valuable than gold nuggets.

    • John

      Granted real estate is insane here in New Atlantis, but we’re apparently not the only place. A friend who lives in the Dallas area sent this. The guy who bought this place is one of the oval office organism’s economic advisors. Figures!

      https://www.dallasnews.com/news/highland-park/2017/01/18/preservationists-decry-razing-105-year-old-highland-park-mansion-trammell-crows

    • Robincho

      They’s called scrapers where I come from. But not quite at that price…

  • JWC

    this man’s brain has slipped to many cogs

  • Jamie_Johnson

    But I’ve been waiting my whole life for the space aliens to come and abduct me, to no avail.

  • bambinoitaliano

    The only reason the shit gibbon is watching this is to feel normal.

  • TK

    Where is your proof that they aren’t, Joe? Huh?! You’re just more fake news. :o)

  • bkmn
  • Do Something Nice

    OT:

    Man tries to drive car into crowd in front of French mosque, police say

    The man said he had wanted to avenge attacks linked to Islamic State
    that have killed dozens in Paris over the past years, according to Le
    Parisien newspaper

  • PickyPecker
  • Sam_Handwich

    Finally, someone has broken the awkward silence surrounding the Martian child slave scandal. Bravo, Mr Steele!

    • PickyPecker

      He tells it like it is.

      • Duh-David

        “He couldn’t say it if it wasn’t true.”

    • Pat

      Geraldo will be along in a moment to investigate this just as soon as he extricates himself from Dump’s butt.

      • pch1013

        I’m just waiting for some deranged Trump cultist (excuse the double redundancy) to travel to Mars with an AR-15 so he can confirm the story for himself.

        • Ross

          I will help them pack.

        • Pat

          If he promises to bring his friends, Alex and Dumpy, I’ll start a gofundme for the spaceship.

          • Robincho

            *reaches for wallet*

    • Dan M

      Sure know what that asshat who invaded the pizza parlor to stop Hillary’s sex ring will be doing when he finishes his sentence.

      • clay

        Backyard rocket ship?

      • Safe for us all if he blows himself off the planet.

    • penpal

      The really fucking sad part of it all is that we have slaves here, on this planet, many of them children, and the right-wing christianist blowhards don’t give a single shit about any of it.

      • clay

        Kris Kobach wants truck drivers to be trained to spot them. Odd that he doesn’t also want truck drivers to be added to the list of required reporters.

      • Those kids aren’t white enough.

  • mizzourah

    This sounds like a great idea, tho. Kidnap all the Duggars and let’s make this happen!

  • Lazycrockett

    What high end NASA official is talking to your crazy fat ass??? None!

    • bambinoitaliano

      He is sitting on a tin foiled butt plug.

      • Oscarlating Wildely

        If his ass gets too close to a microwave, it sparks.

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    Woooh….. look at the colors…woooh…. grovey…..

    https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QhzhGL67-1I/maxresdefault.jpg

  • Treant

    Beam me up, Scotty. There’s no intelligent life down here.

    1) A trip to Mars wouldn’t take 20 years. Nor would you want it to.
    2) Mars does, after all, need women. Apparently.
    3) Chimeric life-forms happen all the time via gene transfer through viral infections. Now that I’ve ruined your day, have fun with that.

    • safari

      We’ve also created a bunch of trans-genetic chimeras in the labs over the years.

      • Treant

        Which doesn’t concern me, either. We’ve been doing it to plants for ages using a simple air gun to blast genes into plant nuclei.

        Yeah, it’s inefficient and we lose most of the cells, but they’re cheap.

        • safari

          I say it is time we bring back atomic gardens.

          • Treant

            Since my potassium sources will all trip a Geiger counter… And I’m a big potassium hound since it tends to be the Great Ignored Element…

            🙂

          • Robincho

            Well, SOMEBODY had to put the “ass” back in potassium…

          • David Walker

            That would mean atomically altered bunnies, and I don’t think you’ll want that.
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_caJjIRC-Q

        • That_Looks_Delicious
          • RoFaWh

            You realize, I hope, that somebody somewhere got paid good money to think up that carrot costume. And somebody else got paid good money to make the silly thing. Both of these facts are indicative of a society that has its head screwed on reasonably tightly, and its priorities well organized; a good thing, iow.

            #cosplay

          • clay

            It should be a crochet project.

          • perversatile
          • David Walker

            My grandmother would have been all over it…finished in an hour…would you like anything else? She was amazing.

          • Ernest Endevor

            And an actor had to go to fittings while costume designer said, “My God, What are we going to do about the size of his ass?” And then said actor had to wear it in public and now his grandchildren have it as their desktop on their Android phones.

          • Palmer

            His name was Stanley Adams, he was a character actor in the 50s and 60s.

          • Palmer

            Poor Cyrano Jones, put into a vegetative state for our amusement.

      • clay

        Why only butch trans-gender chimeras? Why not femme ones?

        What? Oh, never mind.

    • Bomer

      I’ve been told that my heterochromia makes me a chimera. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5569cef9d47a1e9f191c3ab2e6adf7e8c5dbb223e08ff8c549d916f5e1bfe21f.png

      Me when I was 3 years old. The flash makes my green eye look blue.

      • Jonathan Smith
        • Nowhereman

          I love her version of “Cry Me a River” too.

      • Treant

        So you ate your twin? Way to go, dude. Reduce the competition early.

        • Bomer

          I think I had a premonition that my brother was gonna grow up to be a major asshole and didn’t want to take any chances with another one.

  • bkmn

    O/T – seeing reports that Pence and Kobach are trying to get voter info on every single voter (likely to better suppress the vote) and that Texas and nine other states are threatening to sue if DACA is not dropped ASAP. I guess the haterz don’t think Trump is doing things fast enough for them.

    http://thehill.com/homenews/administration/340117-trump-election-integrity-commission-requests-years-of-voter-data-from

    https://www.statesman.com/news/breaking-news/breaking-paxton-other-attorneys-general-ask-trump-administration-phase-out-daca/GGjh82y2rvgvIGPMreuqML/

    • pch1013

      … so they can pass along that voter information to their paymasters in the Kremlin, no doubt.

      • clay

        Possibly, but Kobach is also the one pushing for a reinterpretation of the US Constitution and Census that would allow redistribution of Reps by the number of MAJORITY PARTY votes, rather than residents, severely cutting into representation of cities, “younger” suburbs, and diverse populations (as well as Democrats).

    • clay

      Kobach is facing local fund-raising pressure since he claims he wanted to get rid of “illegal” votes cancelling out valid ones, but was okay cancelling 170,000 (in Kansas, alone. I know, 170,000 in Kansas) valid votes to get rid of six invalid ones. Kobach is facing federal legal pressure since he still hasn’t complied with that court order to turn over whatever document he carried to/from that meeting with Trump. Kobach is facing personal pressure around rumors he’s trying to ditch his wife for someone who’ll look more “presentable” in DC circles.

    • The_Wretched

      Looking for excuses to prosecute and dump people off of roles.

    • Pat

      Ramped up voter suppression was a given the day Dumpy was elected, and he put someone with a background in voter suppression in charge. The R’s mean to turn us into a one party country.

      • The_Wretched

        An apartheid party at that.

  • That_Looks_Delicious

    This is a very important issue and I think Trump needs to tweet about it.

    • safari

      Sarah Huckabee wonders why we have spent 353 minutes on the fake Russia collusion story and no minutes on child slaves on Mars.

    • bambinoitaliano

      But there’s no blood coming out of his hemorrhoid ass.

    • Jonathan Smith

      Invade Mars!

  • Sam_Handwich

    surprised the wingnut didn’t somehow work ass sex into the conspiracy

    low energy. Sad!

    • Tomcat

      And Hillary.

      • Snarkaholic

        She’s opening a pizza shop up there next week.

    • Treant

      I know. Even I work it in as much as possible when it comes to asses.

  • Brooklyn Joe
    • Sam_Handwich

      omg there are pictures!

      #chilling

    • The_Wretched

      Alt-FSM followers?

  • Pat

    Sounds legit. I always thought Alex Jones spent serious time on Uranus.

  • Pollos Hermanos
  • Jonathan Smith
    • Tomcat

      Yes, and yes.

    • another_steve

      The man is, as my mama used to say, laughing all the way to the bank.

      • Jonathan Smith

        Mama was a wise woman.

  • pch1013

    WEHT David Icke (of “Queen Elizabeth II is a shape-shifting space lizard” fame)?

  • PickyPecker
    • Cattleya1

      Marvin is my all-time favorite cartoon character! When I was in college, there was a local chiropractor who did his own radio commercials. He sounded just like Marvin the Martian. I giggled my way to school many mornings imagining him pulling out his Eludium Q Modulator and blasting some unsuspecting patient.

  • AtticusP

    And his stroke will begin in 3… 2…

  • Tomcat

    I agree with him about the chimeras, most of the creatures are christians,

  • Michael R

    Not worth commenting on so here’s cat in shark costume on a Roomba again …

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a58eb351907a3dc9ad2b193e640bcfd7f21c13cfd84173a5ac67ac71721adbe0.gif

  • another_steve

    Even Donald Trump is too smart to fall for this guy’s insane nonsense.

    He watches Jones’ show, I’m guessing, because he wants to be on top of what his Deplorables are watching and listening to.

  • Tomcat

    But Jones actually believes the major media lies.

  • Todd20036

    Shocking is that he lost custody of his kids.
    He seems like such a good, wholesome, stable father.

    • he is amping things up now…nothing is holding him back…

    • clay

      They were kidnapped and sent to Mars.

      • Better than spending time with Alex…

  • liondon#iamnotatraitor

    next up on Hannity ….

  • bambinoitaliano

    Chimp Chimeras
    Chimp Chimeras
    Chimp Chimp Cheero
    The psychotic lard ass he acts like a tool….

  • Silver Badger

    The scary part is that thousands of people believe him.

  • shellback

    Truly, the inmates are running the asylum.

  • RoFaWh

    He’s seriously nuts. It may have started off as a form of method acting, but it’s eaten his soul and now he actually believes his fantasies.

    • pj

      performance art.

  • grada3784

    And this Mars colony is being run by Queen Azura and Ming the Merciless. The kids will be used as cannon fodder in Azura’a war against the Clay People.

    Where are Buster Crabbe, Jean Rogers and Frank Shannon when we really need them?

  • Dejerrity

    It all makes sense to me now. It’s time to buy some more tin foil.

  • William

    Under universal healthcare, Jones’ followers would be netted and placed in mental institutions.

    • 2guysnamedjoe

      That’s why they’re so opposed to it.

    • RoFaWh

      If we can turn the societal clock back far enough, we can put them in treadmills all day long and get some useful energy out of them.

      That’ll teach ’em to be insane and a burden on the economy!!!

      /s

      • William

        There’s no need for the /s, it’s a good plan.

  • The_Wretched

    While there are bacteria that can live in a nuclear reactor, anything multicellular can’t handle it. Mars isn’t quite that bad but it’s a related problem. Noone human or with known biology will be living on the surface of Mars.

    • Natty Enquirer

      That’s just what they want you to think.

    • -M-

      With enough preparation, on Mars is doable. Mine the atmosphere for water, grow food, manufacture rocket fuel, cover the living quarters with a few feet of sand for radiation shielding. Months of elevated radiation exposure during the interplanetary transit is going to cut into your life expectancy under the best of circumstances though and a solar flare could just kill you.

  • Cuberly
  • John

    Wow, words escape me. Is this piece of shit allowed near children?

    • Gustav2

      His ex-wife is trying to keep his away from him.

    • clay

      Not so much anymore.

  • ColdCountry

    Untreated mental illness is so sad. He reminds me of when they used to put mentally ill people on display for the masses “entertainment.”

    • Ken M

      That’s no way to talk about the POTUS

      • Tomcat

        Yeah, I was going to say like right now.

      • ColdCountry

        Him, too.

      • RoFaWh

        I don’t think POTUS is mentally ill in any sense. He knows exactly what he’s doing. Spewing word salad instead of coherent speech is just an act.

    • Sporkfighter

      When they used to? When did they stop?

      • ColdCountry

        They don’t do this anymore.

        “The Bethlem Royal Hospital (Bedlam) is a hospital for the treatment
        of mental illness. Founded in 1247, it’s still running today, so you can
        imagine it has a long and illustrious history. It’s Europe’s first and
        oldest institution to specialize in mental illness.

        “A curious part of this history is that in the 1700s, the hospital was
        considered a tourist attraction. People would go in to be entertained
        to get a feeling of excitement from seeing a ‘freakshow.’ It was so
        popular, that it became a destination on the London Tourist Trail, along
        with the London Tower, the Zoo and the London bridge.”

        http://quadcitiesdaily.com/?p=371496

        • Sporkfighter

          Now we have “The Learning Channel” and “The History Channel” and “Animal Planet”. Ever hear of a repulsive show called “Hoarders”?

          I’d submit we’ve not changed much.

          • ColdCountry

            Good points.

  • Ken M

    When your kids see God as role model…of course they want to go to heaven : )

  • iambu

    Can we invent an Alex Jones Madlib game?

    • Natty Enquirer

      Kind of redundant.

      • iambu

        He does kinda preemptively take some of the fun out of it, doesn’t he? I think it can still be done!

  • Tomcat

    Whac a doo, whac a doo. Another rightwinger gets his wings.

  • JT

    Are you feeling any better, Mr. Jones?
    http://sj.blacksteel.com/media/images/gb01.jpg

  • Ernest Endevor

    It’s Iron Sky, you guys!
    https://youtu.be/Py_IndUbcxc

  • Ken M

    But do the kids get to keep their phones? They would do many things, text, game, twitter, but I doubt call home would be one of them.

  • Cuberly

    The push for Friday fizzled…now they go on a holiday break right?

    https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/880534939200094208

    • Treant

      Yeah, but this bill is clogging the Senate processes like cheese in my intestines*. To get anything else through via this process–like the upcoming budget–they either need to pass this, drop it, or violate Parliamentary rules. Not that they won’t attempt the latter, but that has a decent probability of backfire.

      * I have trouble with cheese.

      • Cuberly

        A buddy told me it’s best this gets dragged out as long as possible, more of a chance of it dying under it’s own weight. I guess that makes sense.

        • Treant

          So just like cheese in my intestines. Eventually… But you don’t want to hear about that, trust me.

          • Cuberly

            lol….maybe it would be better if it was like me and raw green peppers, sort of the opposite of what cheese does to you….ok, yeah, TMI.

          • thatotherjean

            My innards don’t like the cooked ones, either. My sympathies.

          • Cuberly

            Sucks don’t it. I’ve always had a tender tummy. Certain things are just bad bad bad news.

      • Robincho

        Trouble with cheese, eh? I detest that shite. I KNEW there was a reason I was straightening the antimacassars today. Shall we say cocktails at five? Sit right over here. There’s a good fellow…

        • whollyfool

          This comment made my day.

          • Robincho

            And YOU are most welcome too! Five p.m. is pretty much a daily thang here. Super cazh, no place cards. We can always spill out onto the front porch if we have to…

          • whollyfool

            That sounds like the perfect antidote to this craziness. I’ll bring the (non cheese) hors d’oeuvres. 🙂

          • Robincho

            The hors d’oeuvres will be greedily set upon, guaranteed…
            And it’s possible that their courier (that’s you, dude) might undergo the same fate. I’m just sayin’…

          • whollyfool

            I appreciate the thought but I think you’d have to have a lot of cocktails…. I’m of the distaff side. 🙂 But I won’t get in the way, I promise! 🙂 more cocktails and appetizers for me lol.

          • Robincho

            The irony here is that all of a sudden I’m feelin’ real cheesy…

          • whollyfool

            LOL Best response ever. For that (and everything else), you are hereby inducted into my “favorite people” club.

      • thatotherjean

        Considering the bills they’re thinking about, if not yet working on, I’m happy with clogging the Senate, all the way to October. They do need to pass a budget, though.

        • Treant

          I’m rather hoping for four years of continuing resolutions that give away the farm to Democrats like the last one did.

          It’s not like Dumpy will learn to govern, so…

    • bambinoitaliano

      Maybe the turtle will be taking a vacation at Cape Cod. I’m sure the great white love a snack or two.

      • billbear1961

        lol

      • Cuberly

        Turtle soup?

        • bambinoitaliano

          A stew. No sense hurting the great white perfect pearly teeth on a piece of chewy rubbery hide.

          • zhera

            ah, but sharks have awesome teeth! They get replaced on a regular basis. 😀

        • Robincho

          Please do not mock my bambinoitaliano…

    • Sam_Handwich

      yeah, they leave friday and come back on the 10th i think

      i’m wondering if there will be any delicious town halls

      • Cuberly

        Heh, have a feeling some will return to the Koch compound in Colorado for further instructions, or a caning. “Git ze job don Or zer vill be no mors cmpaignz financees fur Yu!”

      • stevenj

        A rooftop picnic hosted by Darrell Issa?

        • Robincho

          What an, um, alarming thought…

      • ChrisMorley

        We must have something without any Tacos on Tuesday to look forward to.

    • JWC

      this means that all these GOP duds can go home and NOT be grilled on the ACA because the pat answer will be “Currently there isn’t one so how can I comment

      • Cuberly

        I find it interesting how they’ve tried multiple lies to try and generate some sort of talking point that’ll stick. It’s just not working. People aren’t falling for it. Thankfully.

        • JWC

          People are just not that bat shit crazy yet

          • Cuberly

            We’re debating such a basic need. Even GOPers are wondering how the fuck did this go south so fast? Cuz they get sucked into the capitalism cures all bullshit.

    • Tomcat

      AAAAAAW. Too bad you guys suck so bad.

    • ByronK

      Back into your shell for a while, you vile political whore.

    • TheSeer

      Fake news!

  • bambinoitaliano
  • Jefe5084

    Up his Lithium arsenate, please.

    • RaygunsGoZap

      Or his arsenic

  • JT
  • romanhans

    I’ll probably be killed for saying this but the children? THEY’RE MAKING IVANKA’S SHOES!

    • grada3784

      Ivanka has sweatshops on Mars too?

      • Jonathan Smith

        why not? she’s got ’em every where else.

  • Kevin Perez

    Guest: This may sound whacky but it’s true so let me expl…
    Alex Jones: You think THAT’S whacky! Hold my crack pipe!!

  • Ragnar Lothbrok

    Finally, the man speaks some truth

  • billbear1961

    It would be a real shame if they took him to Mars and pulled his fucking helmet off.

    • bambinoitaliano

      I doubt he will survive the blast off.

      • billbear1961

        You’re right!

  • safari
    • Treant

      It’s just regular treason! Nothing to see here! Move along!

    • safari

      As I read the story… it’s subject died on May 14. Convenient place to hang a scandal.

  • Sporkfighter
    • Treant

      So those aren’t children, they’re elves!

    • Robincho

      John Waters is SO furious his name isn’t on this one…

  • WitlessProtection

    I am surprised he didn’t say that is where they shipped the Sandy Hook kids off too. It would t have surprised me in the least. I wouldn’t piss on this man if he were on fire.

    • Jonathan Smith

      I would.
      I’d just aim for his face though

  • billbear1961
  • billbear1961
  • The judge gave sole custody to his ex-wife, right?

    • Jukesgrrl

      No, she did not get sole custody. The court ordered the two to be “joint-managing conservators” with shared custody of the children and designated the mother’s home as their “primary residence.” After the trial she remained worried that he had succeeded in a campaign to alienate their affections from her. Other details of the court-ordered resolution were sealed to protect the minor children.

      • TheSeer

        I read that as “joint-managing conservatives”, lol!

  • Acronym Jim

    Berkeley Breathed is laughing his horrified ass off right now.

  • billbear1961
    • Cattleya1

      Just want to say that I am tickled shitless with the prominent place Marvin has payed in tonight’s discussion.

  • safari

    O/T: Here’s a review of Milo’s book. Spoiler: boring. https://gizmodo.com/milo-yiannopoulos-s-dangerous-new-book-isn-t-even-worth-1796476042

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    Come on Bugs, save us from this tin foiled maroon….

    https://youtu.be/Ec-8A5k16Ak

  • billbear1961
  • margaretpoa

    Um…it only takes 6 to 18 months to get to Mars, depending on where the respective planets are at the time. And radiation would kill any complex organism after 4 or 5 years in space, not to mention 20!

    • Jefe5084

      I’m sure the simpleton Alex Jones, will be be unphased by radiation or lack of oxygen, and the greatly reduced gravity may actually benefit him.

    • IDavid

      That’s assuming the Mars colonies are run by humans.

  • billbear1961
    • ultragreen

      I suppose Michael Flynn is a lobbyist for the Martians too.

      • billbear1961

        Can anyone seriously doubt it?

  • -M-

    Cuckoo.

    Twenty years in space? We don’t have that kind of life support, much less the radiation shielding. Even the shortest missions and fastest transits have people justly worried about radiation levels and the risk of flares. And I doubt even an ultra low propulsion interplanetary transport network route would take twenty years from Earth to Mars.

    • CB

      It’s 20 InfoWars years, which is about the duration of a show, or a news cycle. No worries about life support or radiation shielding or any of that durned scy-enz stuff. /s

  • Ryan Hunter

    Severe mental illness is rampant in this group.

  • Karl Dubhe

    It’s like watching mayor Rob Ford, but without the crack pipe.

  • Mickey Bitsko

    A 20 year trip to Mars? Best playdate ever!

  • David Walker

    To paraphrase the ol’ college motto: “And you shall know the truth, and the truth will not match your craziness.” Or “And ye shall know the truth, but it won’t make money for you.” “And you shall know the truth, but lies make it more interesting.”

  • Harveyrabbit

    I knew it!!!!!!!!!!1!1one1!!!!

    But it’s WORSE!! They’re being sent as FOOD!! THey’ve tried it before SHEEPLES!!11

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dk01eeKMD_I

    • coram nobis

      “I read the book!! It’s titled The Art of the Deal!! They’re going to a casino!!”

  • justme

    oh please…
    Someone send Alex.. There’s enough blubber(ing) to fill the Martian fryers

  • Ginger Snap

    I’m so glad I’m just gay and not fucking insane.

  • Leo Tallant

    TWENTY YEARS???? How the hell are they going, via Saturn first?

    From the NASA site:

    “The typical time during Mars’s closest approach to the Earth every 1.6 years is about 260 days. Again, the details depend on the rocket velocity and the closeness of the planets, but 260 days is the number I hear most often give or take 10 days. Some high-speed transfer orbits could make the trip in as little as 130 days.”

  • GanymedeRenard
  • Skeptical_Inquirer

    If the kids have any sense or brains, they’d be ashamed of this.

  • mikeinftl

    Guess Alex won’t have visiting rights with his kids, will he?

  • whollyfool

    I see he’s switched to places that people can’t actually go investigate.

  • Kruhn

    This is ridiculous. And that NASA has to respond shows how far down we’ve gone.

    New from me: NASA Denies InfoWars Report Claiming It’s Running a Child Slave Colony on Mars
    https://t.co/nG56oiYT8K

  • Luddite

    For Goddess sake someone get him on meds.

  • Grumpy Old Man
  • Gregory In Seattle

    I find it hysterically funny — in an entirely non-funny way — that the man making this claim has also sworn up and down that the moon landings were hoaxed because it is impossible for manned space ships to get that far.

  • sword

    If Jones is correct…I hope that they kidnap the two biggest babies in the US: our Glorious Leader and Jones.

  • John Calendo

    The category is …CHIMERA ….First Time in Drags at a Ball.
    {Werk it, girl.)

  • JDS

    I guess he will blame Marvin the Martian.

  • Larry in Oklahoma

    Alex Jones is not even the equivalent of The Enquirer. He’s now the Weekly World News where they just make up stuff to sell the product. When one thinks about his assertions that there are people on Mars, a number of thoughts come to mind. Why aren’t they visible on the Hubble telescope? (What? They are on the back side of the planet and are hidden?) What are they doing for food? What about housing? What about healthcare? Who ARE these people? (Names and locations they came from.) How many trips did it take to get them there and when specifically did they go? Of course, his followers, Rethuglicunts and conservatives don’t bother to think. They just go “YES,” he’s right.

  • SilasMarner

    These people are clinically insane.

  • kareemachan

    WTF?

  • Porkie

    I thought that even the moon landings were fake now we have built a new world on Mars? Whats happening this week in “nuts-r-us”?