Death To Gays Pastor: The Goal Of Public Schools Is To Turn Kids Into Transgender Communists [AUDIO]

Pastor Kevin Swanson, best known for hosting a 2015 GOP forum at which he issued a spittle-flecked endorsement of the bible’s edict to execute homosexuals, has a typically deranged opinion about public schools. Kyle Mantyla reports at Right Wing Watch:

“The state has an agenda with your children,” he warned. “I realize that this may sound a little bit hyperbolic, it may sound [like] a little bit of an exaggeration—I don’t think it is, because I think if you begin to see the trajectory of where things have gone and you just draw it out for the next five, six, eight years, you’re going to find this is the agenda.”

“The goals of the educational program for your kids in the public schools,” Swanson continued, “the goals of the world for your children is that your kids be transgendered and communist by 20 years of age.”

“Of course this is the agenda,” he said. “Parents, just get serious about it. Do you want your kids transgendered and communist at 18 years of age? Is that your goal? If it isn’t, then maybe you ought to bring a different vision into the education of your children.”

Swanson has also declared that the Pulse victims got what they deserved because “God gives up on sinners.”

  • madknits

    The anti-gay sentiment I experienced in high school could only be described as “state sponsored terrorism”. I don’t think the public schools are all that invested in turning out homosexuals. This guy needs a padded room.

    • Paul David

      Totally agreed.

      I had a horrible time in school, and I went to school in Minnesota, just next door to this guy (he’s from Iowa).

      But this isn’t really about what he says it is, is it? He knows schools, for a long time, have been terrible places for gays. He is just using this as an excuse to make money off his moronic flock (his primary concern), and (secondarily) to make like even worse for LGBT people.

      As usual, never believe anything a conservative says, pay attention only to their actions or the concrete consequences of what they say.

    • Ninja0980

      The kids brave enough to be out at our school were bullied, with too many teachers and a school board only too willing to look the other way.

      • madknits

        No one was out at my school (1975-79). But we all knew who the fags were.

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Complete opposite reaction I am happy to note in Quaker schools. I know, it’s a rarity but honestly, it’s like Harvey Milk had a pedagogical baby with Brian Sims. Extremely inclusive.

      • madknits

        I went to one of the largest high schools in the country. We had about 6000 students. It was easy to get lost, but if you were the class fag, it was also easy to be singled out.

        • Oscarlating Wildely

          225 for an entire Quaker Upper (High) School. Everyone kind of knows everyone, being inclusive has to be a given.

          • madknits

            I had 400 in my senior homeroom.
            Graduated 1252, and after summer school, that number was up to about 1300.
            I didn’t know all the teachers in my school, never mind all the students. 😉

      • FAEN

        That’s fabulous!

    • greenmanTN

      School was no picnic for me either, in fact throughout my 20s I had such bad social anxiety I think it was a form of PTSD.

      Kind of funny story though. Last year we hired someone to clean out the barn on my mother’s land. He turned up an old silk screen frame of mine from high school. My senior English teacher made a comment in class about “that fag Boy George” and I was pissed. It wasn’t that I was a huge Culture Club fan, but “fag” definitely crossed the line. So I did a caricature of him as Boy George and printed t-shirts and sold them. It was toward the end of the school year, so it was too late for them to effectively punish me. So I did sometimes get revenge.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fdb9ea3bbdab58b96daca03ea48ffb4aa4113f559668cf842ba65fb06cb63d3f.jpg

      • madknits

        Living well is the best revenge.
        I like your solution. big hugs!

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      • Snarkaholic

        Bravissimo!

      • Paul David

        Um, what you had is what most of us had: an actual form of PTSD.

      • FAEN

        I understand what you mean about PTSD. I had a roommate in college who threatened to kill me. It was a terrifying experience and one where I knew I would not come out ahead.

        When I was in summer school I explicitly asked that he and I be placed at opposite ends of the dorm. I made it known that we had had this issue and I had no desire to be anywhere near him.

        They nodded, reassured me that my concerns would be taken care of and promptly made him my neighbor!

        I’m in a better place now but the realization that I was not going to be protected by the university really threw me for a loop. I still suffer from anxiety but have more of a handle on it.

      • FAEN

        LOL-well done!

      • vorpal 😼

        I had it relatively easy in that I am very “gender conforming” so I seldom got the abuse that less traditionally gender conforming kids get. I knew I was gay from a very young age and saw the insults and abuse that was heaved onto others at the slightest hint of nonconformity, and even that was very traumatizing to me. To be on the receiving end of it as some kids are? I’m not surprised the rate of suicide amongst LGBT teens (and adults, as the emotional scars from this kind of abuse persist) is so much higher than amongst our heterosexual peers.

        And people like Kevin Swanson think they are helping for making life even more hellish for LGBT youth. What a piece of human scum.

        • greenmanTN

          I am fairly gender conforming too, but I wasn’t a jock, read like a fiend, was an artist, so the timbre of my voice or how I walked didn’t really matter. In retrospect I don’t think they actually knew that I really was gay, just that I was shy and an easy target, but when YOU know you’re gay that distinction is hard to make at that age.

          I think at some point it was no longer entertaining to bully me because I wasn’t going to react in the way they expected so they moved onto other targets.

          It wasn’t daily, just enough so I felt I couldn’t let down my guard, was hyper-vigilant, etc. In later years it was better but you get used to the protective strategies you developed and continue using them even though they are no longer needed and it’s dysfunctional.

          • vorpal 😼

            The hyper-vigilance was exhausting. Most of my friends were heterosexual guys, and I often had a girl chasing after me, and coming up with excuse after excuse to not date any of them was challenging and anxiety producing. Even for the least obvious of gay kids, the vigilance and emotional distress of having to live a lie really takes its toll. Not feeling like anyone actually knows you and there are so many important things you cannot talk to anyone about can be excruciatingly depressing.

      • boatboy_srq

        You studied with B.G. Pufnstuf? What was that even like?

    • boatboy_srq

      It’s all about the keywords. “Trans” and “commie” are the worst insults they can sling, so that’s what they use. His parents probably talked about the pinko menace in their day.

      • madknits

        When I was in divinity school, and getting divorced, I moved out of the apartment I shared with my (soon to be ex-) wife into a dorm, but at the law school at my university. No one would speak to me on the hall that semester, since I wasn’t a law student. My room was across the hall from the lounge, and as I went into it one night, I heard one of the guys say, “Who’s the new guy in room 419?” And the other replied, “Some commie pinko from Massachusetts.”
        I opened the door and said, “I’m a socialist, not a commie; I’m not sure what a pinko is, and I’m more of a progressive than a liberal.”

        No wonder no one spoke to me.

        • boatboy_srq

          Law school does that to people, or so I’m told. Congrats on your escape, both from the dorm and from the spouse.

        • vorpal 😼

          I would consider it a win.

      • vorpal 😼

        Commie is sooooo cried wolf.
        Someone needs to tell Kevin Swanson that the fear term du jour is “Social Marxist.”

  • Xiao Ai: The Social Gadfly

    Grifter says, what?

  • Tawreos

    Great plan, make sure that this whole country dies out in a generation.

  • crewman

    it may sound [like] a little bit of an exaggeration—I don’t think it is […] the goals of the world for your children is that your kids be transgendered and communist by 20 years of age.

    You are either insane or lying. Either way you have zero credibility. End of story.

    • Paul David

      Crewman, it’s Door # 3, not numbers one and two as you surmise.

      Door # 3 is the one conservatives always prefer: use anger and hatred to transfer money from the wallets of your moronic followers to your own bank account.

    • swimboy

      He’s not lying, it does sound like a little bit of an exaggeration.

      • David Walker

        But just a little.

  • Rex

    Compared to whatever this man is, transgendered and communist sounds like a better option.

    • Scribble Writer 🌹 ☭
      • Capritaur

        While it’s important to recognize the intersectionality of privilege and oppression, I’m suspicious of any such attempt to instigate infighting within, and to divide, the LGBT community and the Progressive/Left.

        • Scribble Writer 🌹 ☭

          What attempt to instigate infighting? Those people just look like they’re protesting to me

          • Statistics Palin

            Fuck that. The Muslims aren’t denouncing anti-gay genocide in Chechnya. They are on their own.

      • boatboy_srq

        Didn’t Transcommunists open for the Recreational Abortionists on their last tour?

        • Scribble Writer 🌹 ☭

          I believe they opened for God-Hating Atheists

  • Acronym Jim

    No, it doesn’t sound a “little bit hyperbolic,” it sounds completely unhinged!

    • Skokieguy [Larry]

      His new job in the Trump administration is being announced next week.

    • Chucktech

      Rimming jesus will do that to you.

  • WitlessProtection

    Yeah and Christians want your kids to be a source of income as soon as they get a job.

    • Xiao Ai: The Social Gadfly

      There’s an argument, to be made, that the anti-abortion actihicks are aiming for the womb as a source of income.

  • He says that like it’s a bad thing!

    • Berdawn Hutchinson

      Like when Trump said that if Clinton won it would mean taco trucks on every corner!

      • *Sigh*

        I really would have liked having those taco trucks everywhere.

  • Skokieguy [Larry]

    By 18? Damn, we have to work harder! Certainly we can indoctrinate them into changing genders and being commies even sooner? Commies who love brunch & gin & tonics… /S

    Also, totally O/T but just as sane and plausible as nutjob Swanson:

    “Ryan Bundy says in a lawsuit that he has been forced to strip down while
    jail authorities “peer” up into his “rear body cavity hundreds of times.”

    https://www.buzzfeed.com/jimdalrympleii/nevada-standoff-leader-says-hes-been-strip-searched?bfsource=bbf_enus&utm_term=.moQoZ6V3B#.hdYKzZAY0

  • ByronK

    And all this time I thought is was to turn them into asexual unicorns.

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Shhhhh! Dammit, Byron, keep your voice down! I told you about sharing the Big Bad Queer Agenda.
      Next thing, you’re going to share Bruce’s mimosa recipe and plan to overtake the world and gurl is going to be pissed!

      • Tawreos

        Did someone say Mimosa?

      • Tor

        I would kill for that recipe.

      • ByronK

        Sorry, my bad. This is why Bruce doesn’t give me any recipes. 🙁

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    Dear Pastor:
    Do fuck off.

    Yours in Christ (no really, I’m in him right now)
    We Queers

    And on a happy thought, Disney sweet bromance candy (and for those musical loving aficionados out there, JF plays John dude dug dick Laurens in Hamilton.)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DLzyvT4eUo&index=1&list=PLXaH20eIS38bZQwg9kNg6PHYufF4V3eCp

  • Scribble Writer 🌹 ☭

    HELL YES. I support this.

  • safari

    We will switch lunch to brunch in schools and provide canapes and sparkling beverages between classes.

    • another_steve

      Feed kindergarten-age children Starbucks Cinnamon Toast Crunch Frappuccinos.

      That oughta do it.

      • Paula

        With double espresso shots in it.

        • Xiao Ai: The Social Gadfly

          For kids? Semen girl, not caffeine.

          • another_steve

            I like my semen on the side.

          • fuzzybits

            Less calories that way.

          • another_steve

            Exactly. The calories add up.

            When I order a Caesar Salad for instance, I always say to the server, “Semen on the side, please. Not mixed in.”

          • RoFaWh

            “Fewer”

            Note the difference between “much ink” and “many inks” or “little ink” and “few inks”.

          • fuzzybits

            Blah.

      • Chucktech

        Whew… all that semen…

        • Paula

          I wonder if the semen latte pastor will be at trumpie’s discrimination EO signing?

          • Chucktech

            He’ll certainly be semen-squirting over it.

          • clay

            He turned his back on Trump ‘cuz Donny didn’t move fast enough to condemn the “right” people.

          • FAEN

            Of course. With a semen SB in hand.

      • lattebud

        With protein powder

    • fuzzybits
    • Snarkaholic

      And anyone who doesn’t dance to their next class (while singing show tunes) will receive detention!

    • lattebud

      And gym class is now:

      1. Dodgeball
      2. Speedo beach volley ball
      3. Weight training wear no shirts are permitted
      4. Flagging
      5. Dancing to EDM

      • Todd20036

        Actually, my gym class in high school really was weight training.
        Shirts required though. I got my start as a gym bunny back then

        • FAEN

          You sound like a good trainer

    • FAEN

      And make sure everyone is dressed decently.

  • The Milkman

    Christian love. It’s like a warm blanket, isn’t it?

    These people would like nothing better than to see Chechen-style death camps for LGBT people. And unless we are vigilant about church/state separation, they might one day succeed.

    • fuzzybits

      Feels like a wet blanket in a below zero blizzard.

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      A warm blanket– with smallpox included!

      • 1Myles1

        Washita,anyone?

  • Michael

    Another f*cking closet case that has a one way ticket to Hell.

  • Dan M

    no doubt Swanson’s goals for religious schools are to make sure they are Nazis by 19.

  • bmoore4026

    How this man hasn’t been brought down by his secrets is beyond me

    • clay

      The GOP appears to be looking the other way regarding (their own) electoral shenanigans.

      • Paula

        They say yeah he’s a asshole but, he’s our asshole.

        • clay

          Well, I am kinda fond of my own asshole.

  • William

    It sounds like someone is applying to be Deputy Secretary of Education.

    • David Walker

      But that would mean he’d have to work for sweet Betsy of Voss. I think his god forbids that.

  • Capritaur

    Oops, who let out the secret? At least he doesn’t know they’re also supposed to turn Muslim.

  • Rex

    Solves both the school uniform and what bathroom to use issues.

  • popebuck1

    Well, which is it? Are we all supposed to be trans communists by age 18, or 20? Because either way I’m WAY behind schedule.

    • Stogiebear

      Tell me. I have to stop and pay bills every month. I think we’re also going to have to advocate for more undocumented immigrants to take up the slack.

  • Tor

    Is it age 20 or age 18? Get your fucking story straight.

    • Ragnar Lothbrok

      Just Split the Difference and make it 19.
      We are going to have to change the radical agenda now, but at least it will prevent future confusion.

      • David Walker

        You are suggesting a compromise? A compromise? We cannot compromise or all the evil forces of the world will take over. Never! On the other hand, it’s probably OK to average the numbers.

        • Ragnar Lothbrok

          Actually, I confess that I am in charge of printing “The Agenda”.
          Was just trying to make some extra coin.

  • KnownDonorDad

    There’s a man in need of ECT.

    • fuzzybits

      An anvil to the head.

      • greenmanTN

        And not one of those Wile E Coyote anvils either. They never seem to really get the job done.

        • Ragnar Lothbrok

          God that always bugged me ! Still does !!

          • Bad Tom

            And gravity doesn’t work until you look down.

          • William

            Don’t look down!

          • RoFaWh

            That’s actually the advice given to people who have had their ability to walk messed with.

          • Bad Tom

            Wiley E. Coyote never gets that.

    • William

      Trepanning.

      • Bad Tom

        But if you let the devils in his head out, they might go someplace else.

        • The_Wretched

          It’d be like an anime with a 50 story monster being released.

    • RoFaWh

      I recommend corporal punishment. Daily beatings at 6 am, the rack at 8, bastinado at 10, hanging by the thumbs at noon, and so on.

      Every day.

      Including weekends.

      My right knee was replaced February 2016 and unexpectedly triggered a dormant back problem. Come this time of year and I learned why torture works. The pain was far more intense than I believed possible and even now, a year later, I get occasional sharp pains in my right calf. Not nice. Subject Swanson to such pain and he’d be on his knees committing unpardonable sins, if only they’ll stop torturing him.

  • Frostbite

    This makes a lot of sense, so the goal of public schools is to turn all girls into boys, and all boys into girls? Uh, leaving the kids who they are now doesn’t make sense? What the hell is this idiot on and who is his dealer?

    • djcoastermark

      So if all the boys are girls and all the girls are boys, what’s the problem? The religies are just nuts.

    • David Walker

      He’s high on scam; Jeebus is his dealer.

  • Rex

    With Betsy DeVos as Secretary of Education, I doubt either will happen soon. Unless there’s a bear in the school, then all bets are off.

  • Rex

    Well, damn, should my kid get a dress for prom or rent a tux?

    • OdieDenCO

      go 50/50 – tux on top dress on bottom

      • Oscarlating Wildely

        Or lovely tux jacket over a sleek prom dress. For example, a flat line, cream colored, slightly plunging neckline (black stones, of course, for the necklace) with a shawl tux jacket (embroiders on lapels, matching black velvet stylish yes sensible shoes), complete with tail on the tux, and intricate black fishnet stockings. Matching flapper silver purse, and slight rise black fedora.
        Just off the top of my head, having thought of it at all.

        • Beagle

          You can always split the difference with a kilt.

  • Rex

    The only point he’s proving is the educational system is not doing a good job.

  • clay

    If they think that’s the goal of public schools, no wonder they think public schools are failing.

  • Paul David

    This guy is from Iowa.

    Let that sink in for a minute: Iowa.

    It’s amazing, as a former Midwesterner, just how radicalized much of the Midwest has become.

    It’s definitely not home anymore (thank god), but it’s also an increasingly inhospitable place to most.

    • Ragnar Lothbrok

      Every state has their nut jobs.

      • Paul David

        But the Midwest seems to attract a lot of them.

        When the FUCK did Iowa become the home territory of America’s Taliban?

        • Ragnar Lothbrok

          I think when the FUCK was after too many years of Fox, Rush, Jan Mickelson, ( WHO radio ) Steve King, etc.
          We even hatched Michelle Bachman, but had her deported to MInn .

          • Paul David

            I agree.

            The ongoing problem with America is, quite literally, the conservative movement.

            And it’s been way under-reported on the ways in which it’s quite literally destroyed whole areas…like Iowa, and Wisconsin, and Kansas.

            Conservatism has so corrupted the culture in these areas, and radicalized people to such and extent that people like me–you know, gay men who work in well-paying fields who make $200K plus per year–will not go anywhere near these areas.

            Which, of course, keeps these areas ideologically pure but severely affects economic activity.

            Oh well, I hope they all sink back into the muck they crawled out of.

          • Ragnar Lothbrok

            It’s very depressing, frankly. We are looking to skedaddle at some point.

          • Paul David

            Outside of Minneapolis and Chicago, the rest of the Midwest could be nuked into hot glass and average IQs in the West would rise substantially.

        • Oscarlating Wildely

          Got lost on the way home to Michigan.

        • clay

          It’s not so much that they attract nut-jobs, so much as they drive off everyone else.

          • Ragnar Lothbrok

            ^ Yup

          • Paul David

            I don’t know a single person from my high school–it was in central Minnesota, the Armpit of America–who stayed anywhere near home.

            And the ones who left, like myself, are now all highly-paid professionals.

            The ones who stayed? A smattering of (then) teen moms, the teen-mom-daddies, and other assorted mouth-breathers (is there an equivalent epithet for those who are too stupid to get an abortion?).

            So, you are correct.

          • RoFaWh

            My high school class has scattered to the four winds due to the county I grew up undergoing a demographic transition since then, from white to black.

    • Chucktech

      Yet Iowa was the first god-addled state to legalize same sex marriage. That’s still tough for me to wrap my head around.

      • Ragnar Lothbrok

        Decent Judges who put law over Idiology

        • Chucktech

          … in freaking IOWA!

          • Ragnar Lothbrok

            We have always had a progressive tilt historically.

            But yeah, the Focus on the Fake Family crowd got the judges removed shortly thereafter.

          • Chucktech

            Not all of them.

          • Ragnar Lothbrok

            Right. It worked very well, I think they managed to remove 2 or 3 in 2010 after Iowa’s 2009 ruling.
            There were a couple of progressive judges left that they have since tried to oust without success.

          • David Walker

            You ought to give Iowa a try…provided you are contrary. Emphasis on the con.

          • Ragnar Lothbrok

            Corntrary

      • Paul David

        It was a judicial thing.

        The rest of the state was aghast for a long time. Complete anomaly.

        • Chucktech

          Yeah, ain’t it a bitch when sound jurisprudence and adhering to the Constitution rankles the pious, godly rubes…

          • Paul David

            So inconvenient.

            Except when you’re “winning” and can use the same systems to stick it to libtards…then it’s amazing and wonderful and all of what America is about!

    • clay

      Iowa, first in the nation presidential caucuses!

      • Ragnar Lothbrok

        That needs to end.

      • Paul David

        Not if rumblings in CA are to be believed.

        It’s long past time that California–and not a bunch of inconsequential Midwestern hicks–takes a more prominent role in primary season.

        • clay

          A (unintended?) consequence would be make presidential campaigns much more expensive to get into. By starting small, individuals who’ve not yet up war-chests can still participate. Having it in Iowa, however, makes agricultural lobbyists disproportionately powerful. There should be more representative small states.

          • Paul David

            There are not, though.

            Name one “representative” small state?

            Iowa also gives extra weight to the religious wingnuts, since they are so plentiful and powerful in that godforsaken state.

            Which makes sense, if you’ve ever met an Iowan. They are truly the stupidest people under the sun…smdh.

          • clay

            Well, except our beloved Iowa Viking, Ragnar

  • Statistics Palin

    Have you heard about the new Mercedes for Baptist Pastors? I seats five or forty if you count the ashtrays.

  • fuzzybits

    OT:Only “mildly nauseous” Comey says over the email leaks.

  • Ragnar Lothbrok

    Oh Great, now they know all our plans

  • JW Swift

    “I realize that this may sound a little bit hyperbolic…”

    Ummm, yeah. Actually “a bit hyperbolic” doesn’t even come close to covering it, there, Bubba.

  • Ben in Oakland

    I wonder if Miss Anderson went to a public school. It would explain so much.

  • another_steve

    Johnny in the second grade turned me gay. He was platinum blond. Exotically gentile-looking.

    I was obsessed with him.

    • Chucktech

      Oh, baloney. You were a big ol’ ‘mo in the womb…

      • another_steve

        Well come to think of it, I do remember snapping my fetal fingers as my mother was listening to Frank Sinatra’s rendition of Mack the Knife.

  • Cuberly

    Swanson was in HS till he was…20?

  • fuzzybits
  • safari

    Programming note: Spicy is at 2 today

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    “Do you want your kids transgendered and communist at 18 years of age?”
    Oh pastor, not that!! At 18! My daughter came out as gay at 12. Communist ? All of the early teens have ben that for ages. Wait until 18? No, not any more. Nothing to worry about, sweet cakes.

  • Mickey Bitsko

    How is that a problem for him? Communists spend most of their fighting with each other.

  • Chuck in NYC

    These nutcases have always existed. The problem with all these nutcases today is the Internet gives them a virtually equal platform with everyone else to spew their nutcasery around the country, not to mention the globe.

    • Chucktech

      The double-edged sword, though, is that lots of rational people who don’t pay attention to godly cretins suddenly hear bat-shit crazy shit like this and think “wee-oh, religion is nuts…”

  • TheManicMechanic

    The goal of religious schools and homeschooling is to turn looose a bunch of needy drains on society incapable of giving back great things, and only ensure idiocy that continues to keep religionists in power.

    • RoFaWh

      Which is why I’m in favor of abolishing parochial and private schools, home schooling, and anything else that takes kids out of the public schools.

      • TheManicMechanic

        Hear, hear.

  • David Walker

    Not entirely OT. This is from today’s “Novaya Gazeta,” one of Russia’s few remaining independent presses:

    “The Ministers of Foreign Affairs of France, Germany, Great Britain, the Netherlands and Sweden wrote a collective letter to Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov in connection with gay rights in Chechnya and threats against journalists. This was reported by RFI.
    “European diplomats have expressed concern about the situation and demanded an investigation.
    “‘Dear colleagues, we are deeply moved by the numerous reports of international organizations regarding the repression suffered by homosexuals in Chechnya,’ said in the letter.
    “The letter called for ‘the Russian government to investigate these terrible accusations, and guarantee the safety of activists and journalists who are investigating.'”

    https://www.novayagazeta.ru/news/2017/05/03/131296-glavy-mid-pyati-stran-evropy-potrebovali-rassledovat-pohischeniya-geev-v-chechne?utm_source=push

  • CanuckDon

    “the goals of the world for your children is that your kids be transgendered and communist by 20 years of age.”

    “Transgendered and communist”….is that a remake of “Justified and Ancient”?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu8fwgGFhvI

  • Brooklyn Joe

    Someone should tell the RNC spokesperson complaining about the First Amendment and Fake News – that this guy gets the right to spout his hate speech (and we get the right to turn it off)

  • fuzzybits

    I wonder if Betsy Devos agrees with this opinion?

  • saucetin

    “[this] may sound a little bit hyperbolic…”

    No, of course not. You sound very reasonable. For a 5150 nutcase. Stay calm.

    • Beagle

      Same script, change the setting — Swanson could make a first-rate stand-up comic.

  • bambinoitaliano

    The biggest sin are these self-appointed evangelists who abuse the religion pretending to be god making moral judgment against fellow human. This kind of sin should be punishable by death.

    • Friday

      Well, maybe the Christians ought to see about that rather than wondering how death-threattey or compromisey about the rest of us to be. 🙂

    • -M-

      Deserves and should are two different things.

    • RoFaWh

      I’d be happier if their behavior was flatly illegal, not just sinful.

  • Hank

    Kevin Swanson is an Orthodox Presbyterian pastor and broadcaster from Colorado, known for his condemnation of homosexuality, as well as his advocacy of Christian education. He is the director of Generations, a subsidiary of the Christian Home Educators of Colorado, which produces Generations Radio, a daily radio program hosted by Swanson…..

    He has speculated that the Devil purchased Disney in 1984, to make movies that will indoctrinate small children into sin
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/4e9164f2b9c7d8f9e6933f886d86a59b09130d6cfe6a09f1d3c856b81be8f020.gif

    • David Walker

      Ummm. I’m not sure how to ask this, but could I borrow this guy for a couple of days? I think I need to be filled with his holy spirit. True, he’s shaking his head “no,” but there’s “yes” in his eyes.

      • ByronK

        I call shotgun!

      • Hank

        Use him as you see fit… and vice versa!!! L’Chaim!!! 😉

      • Oscarlating Wildely

        Line is down the hall, after that group of dozen guys. They follow him everywhere! Damn! Twelve– is that like, what dodecag-orgy?

      • Robincho

        There seems to be quite a lot of “yes” in my pants, too…

        • Paul David

          Really?

          Isn’t that a wig?

      • lattebud

        He is saying, “No, not here in the sanctuary. But let’s go the confession booths. They are never used”

        • RoFaWh

          There are no confessionals (“booths”) in Protestant churches.

    • Gene

      Wiki says that the “Orthodox” Presbyterians have about 31,000 members worldwide…but, from discussions with the TWO I have met, they say its really probably closer to HALF of that number…in short, this guys whole denomination would not be able to fill a really large arena, or standard mega church..

      he is a loser preaching to a shrinking little sect…pathetic

    • Paul David

      I thought he was from Iowa?

      I guess I stand corrected…not that there’s much difference.

      My theory about Iowa, and it holds for Colorado, is that people in those areas are so coddled by the banality of existence there that they can believe this kind of ridiculous bullshit.

      In a more dynamic area, these moronic, reality-detached, and just-plain-weird ideas don’t hold…reality intercedes and destroys them immediately.

      Yet another reason we should cordon off whole swaths of America and nuke them into glass.

      • RoFaWh

        Some additions to your little list of places where existence is banal:

        1. Kansas
        2. Nebraska
        3. the Dakotas
        4. Montana [there are parts of Montana more than 200 miles from the nearest interstate)
        5. Idaho
        6. all of Oregon and Washington east of the Cascades
        7. pretty much the entire South and Appalachia.

        • Paul David

          Eastern WA/OR are fucking weird. I wish we could just cut those dipshits loose.

        • RoFaWh

          A word about Montana: watch any video of the “Empire Builder” train (Chicago to Seattle and Portland) as it runs through Montana. Lots of tiny, tiny settlements, lots of empty land. Not a place I’d care to live in.

  • Cackalaquiano

    What are the university classes that teachers take to learn how to teach kids to be both transgender and communist?

    • Treant

      “Literature of Women” was a major influence on me. “Calculus II” just sealed the deal.

      • RoFaWh

        It was nonlinear differential equations that got me in touch with my inner fag.

  • BearEyes

    false prophet, anyone?

    • -M-

      financial profit, for him.

  • Elsewhere1010

    So… how we doing?

  • ByronK
    • David Walker

      Mark Twain: “Heaven for climate; hell for society.”

  • Gene

    as one of believers here (more of us than some suspect), I gotta say…guys like this make me realize why so many look at organized faith and just go “nah. No thanks. I am better without it”

    • Friday

      I just thank the Goddess I’m Pagan a lot. 🙂

    • Oscarlating Wildely

      [pet peeve: dangling participle. So, they were gay in the bible but not in Grimms Fairy Tales?]

    • edrex

      and evidently they were hot.

    • andrew

      Whether myth or real, it is one of the very few real love stories in the entire bible.

      • Steve Teeter

        There’s also Ruth & Naomi, Book of Ruth. There ya go.

        • andrew

          It’s interesting that they both depict the deep love between two people of the same sex. In the NT it is mentioned a couple times that John was the apostle whom Jesus loved. I can’t think of any examples of tender heterosexual love stories anywhere in that primitive tome. Women are just men’s property to be used for sexual gratification and for bearing children, preferably male children.

  • PeterC

    Swanson is the person with AN AGENDA . And he is “the communist” as he wants to control every one’s thoughts to match his. Very pathetic and scary for our kids and this country..

    • JD

      take your point, but note that communism is an economic theory and one arguably quite “Christian”. It became an argument to support a totalitarian regime…uncomfortably familiar…

      • -M-

        It’s a valid point though. The right wing here in the US constantly accuses the entire left of endorsing a collectivist economic ideology of communism or socialism, which they overwhelmingly don’t. Meanwhile the Republicans and “conservatives” actually are the tribe that wants government or societal top down control over religious morality concerning private matters like sex, family, medical decisions, identity, free speech etc…

  • Friday

    Err, sure, preacher, if by ‘a little exaggeration’ you mean ‘Face-chewing murderous delusional lunacy.’

  • Nic Peterson

    Transgender and communist? The level of stupid among his followers just hurts and he says it’s just hyperbole. They don’t even know what hyperbole means.

    • djcoastermark

      And lard knows, I don’t want to be anywhere near when they pop that hyperboil.

  • edrex

    no. the goal of public schools is to teach children abt. andrew jackson’s role in the civil war, and the lessons of the weimar republic.

  • Clive Johnson

    “Do you want your kids transgendered and communist at 18 years of age?”

    What’s the problem here?

  • RodentiaHaze

    Remember kids, when scourging the communicable mental illness of supernaturalism, always follow proper safety procedures.

    Today’s safety rule is: Never stand in the path of a lit Chitstain fundamentalist.

    We know they never go very far once you touch one off, but the high fat content of their heads can make them just like a big greasy candle near the end of the burn. Smart scourgers launch these superstition-addled monkeys downhill so that they will fall down before they could ever come back to annoy anyone again.

    • RoFaWh

      Yesterday’s safety rule was “never leave home without donning your brain condom.”

  • Richard B

    Though these words are nothing more than meaningless babblings from a deranged mentally ill religiously broken man. We still have to keep an eye on him, for some reason, republican line up to covet his favor.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cc2b54ee70cd6aa5ccf24973f67c9b419243d864579587bd3e659a1a258b32ee.jpg

  • RoFaWh

    If he was right (and he obviously isn’t!) we’d expect to see that everyone under a certain age is queer and trans.

    BTW, teaching children that, yes, gay and trans people exist and deserve the same treatment as others is not propagandizing them and trying to convert them (which never works and never will, no more than various anti-gay “therapies” work.).

    If you have a problem with this, please give me time to make popcorn before you finally reveal your true self; it should be quite a sideshow when you are tried for sexual exploitation of minors.

  • FAEN

    You are either ignorant, and ignorant asshole or a willfully ignorant asshole if you believe the words that are coming out of his mouth.

  • zhera

    “I realize that this may sound a little bit hyperbolic, it may sound [like] a little bit of an exaggeration”

    Nooooo, never!

  • vorpal 😼

    No Child Left Cisgendered and Democratic™

  • Mike_in_the_Tundra

    Maybe he hears voices.

    • andrew

      Ya think.

  • Canadian Observer

    Silly me, I thought the purpose of school was to break children’s spirits and get them used to chronic boredom… in other word, to produce good little workers to keep the minimum wage sector going. What else am I wrong about?

    • Steve Teeter

      Yer not wrong about that.

  • Mrs. Councillor Nugent

    Gosh, darn, flunked again

  • northern_neighbour

    Someone needs to help this cray cray critter see how he is more desperately needed up there in Gawd’s eternal Kingdom of paranoid delusional bliss.

    I don’t know what Kevin has been smoking … but WTFuck??

    And he sees himself as “Christian” ????? … just HOW EXACTLY??

    … Could that ever even be possible for such a man in Satan’s Thrall?

    Because there is not a single Christian grace or synapse in this evil & hysterical attention whore.

    Maybe he could benefit from “Bob” the Exorcist. to get those Demons OUT!!!
    (For a hefty price, of course!). Hehe.

    • Friday

      If you’re a Christian that thinks Christians are still somehow supposed to be the good guys, could you look to that or something? -Yer neighbors.

      • northern_neighbour

        Thursday morning reply to ‘Friday’ written on Wednesday and I did not quite get your drift or the remark about yer neighbours.

        So here is the scoop: I’m not a Christian and never will be!

        Nonetheless I have followed the golden rule for the most part and you do not have to be Christian to do that … most of the “Christians” do NOT in fact follow the Golden Rule, but quite the opposite as we can easily observe.

        I was a believer until age 15 and 1/2 and back then I did think that, as a Christian … I was supposed to be kind, polite, helpful, tolerant industrious and honest as well as compassionate … all the while suffering a great deal of personal shame and self loathing for my non hetero-normative sexuality.

        Around that time however, thinking about how “God” allowed so much evil and suffering in the world by his own free choice, He supposedly being omnipotent, … I realised I could do a far better job than him, (if I were to possess his powers) )and became pretty angry at the despicable failures of a vengeful and hateful god.

        I soon realised that “God” is our own DNA, our own human blueprint, and that men created God and all the variations and various creation Gods in their own image. for the most part. These men who made the story of God up these were the first clergy/religious figures and it gave them power and control over the rest of mankind. An evil in itself.

        I realised I had to live an existential life. I had to accept the reality of natural death some day as a fact of existence and not act as though I was entitled to a non-ending personal existence. This is why we have children so they can carry on human existence. Good or evil is up to ourselves.
        Existential persons seek the good, and sociopaths seek the evil.

        It took some years however after my newfound atheism to forgive myself for being homosexual in my attraction to men exclusively.

        Every one of my handful of relationships has been a loving one, but the first one I screwed up because of ongoing self rejection.

        He was 22 and I was 17 and he was a beautiful and wonderful guy. We loved one another but I pushed him away in the end and wrongfully so. He deserved so much better from me. First love usually doesn’t end well but if I had grown up today, things would have gone differently for sure.

        As a physician I am not judgemental with people, and treat all with respect and tolerance and caring.

        Sometimes I see that certain folk come in pushing the idea that they are so “Christian” that they deserve extra attention and priority treatment, somehow that they are better and more worthy than my run of the mill patients.

        These vocal hypocrites are weak and insecure and fearful, … but whatever !!

        But when they express bigotry or racism or sexism or the like I call them out on it.

        Some Christians, rather few but very good to observe, actually do behave as the Jesus of the bible advocated.

        But far more NON-Christians actually demonstrate those good values and behaviours than do the average self proclaimed “Christian” that I encounter.

        We see that the existentialists are the ones marching against the outrages of the Trump seizure of power and its blatantly anti-Christian abuse of every vulnerable group in America.

        Some christians are marching, yes ,but 80% of white evangelicals voted for Trump and 78% of them still support him. Christians in America have given themselves a bad name, and they deserve that bad name, collectively.

        Some are humble and quiet about their good work and generosity, unlike the flashy unctuous smarmy glib ones who are always preening and parading their supposed ‘virtue.

        So Religion has a lot to answer for both historically and present day.

        So no, I am quietly and proudly non-Christian, although I don’t run around getting in peoples faces about it, the way so many of them do to us.

        My post was meant to be ironic, and I presume you took it that way.

        And sorry if I did not get what your post was getting at. Have a great Spring and get with the DAILY RESISTANCE!

        • Friday

          Hee, I’m of a non-Christian faith, (Actually, Pagan,) and I was just pointing out to monotheists that Christianity as a whole is being very nasty to its neighbors and might want to do something about what they’re being used for by these hate-preachers and pols, rather than just try to do image therapy about it like we’re supposed to think this isn’t happening.

  • TexasBoy

    Hallelujah! Praise White Jesus and White Santa!

  • Gay voice! And… Swanson? Come on, “Swanson”? Talk about a swishy name!

  • Gianni

    And Donald is concerned about ‘foreign evils coming into the country to harm us’? We have our own here already, witness this vicious Mofo. Plus, I’m very surprised to learn that one can be taught to be transgendered. I learned a long time ago from jerks like this that one can be taught to be homo, but I thought that was the limit of teaching how to choose one’s own sexuality. I’m always will to learn new things, but being of a skeptical mindset, may I see some proof of your seemingly dumbassed assertions?

  • Bluto
  • gwhiz007

    It must be a very very very stealth lesson plan because I have never seen it.

  • AaronD12

    If he wants to kill gays, that mother fucker better start with his own closeted ass.

  • Lee Grupsmith-Pedersen
  • DesertSun59

    Someone please take this man out. He’s GIVING ALL OF OUR SECRETS AWAY. HOW DARE HE MAKE THAT ULTRA-SPECIAL SECRET PUBLIC!!!!!!

  • Jim Gallagher-Barker

    Hey, Swanson. Go get your self made into a chicken dinner.

    • grada3784

      I think you meant turkey dinner, since this guy is such a turkey.

      • Jim Gallagher-Barker

        Nope, I meant chicken. Because he’s like an old stringy TV dinner. And he’s too chicken to face his own true self: eventually he’s going to be caught fondling a male hooker while doing blow and watching luggage lifting porn.

  • Jean-Marc in Canada
  • Wynter Marie Starr

    No, asshole. The goal of educators and public schools are to teach children how to critically think and how to learn. I realize that’s scary for a gasbag like you, but it is true nevertheless. Some schools are out to get gay kids and don’t care if they drop out or kill themselves, but I wouldn’t consider those places of education.

  • Halou

    Between him and a school-educated transgender communist, I’d take the latter any day.

  • I’m wondering how butt-numbingly stupid anyone has to be to pay attention to a whackjob like Kevin Swanson.