Patron Collapses At Hello Dolly But Waves Off EMTs Because He’d “Sooner Die” Than Miss The Second Act

The New York Post reports:

At the Bette Midler show — which has instantly become Broadway’s hottest ticket, raking in $1.4 million in its first five performances — a source told us, “Around halfway through the first act,” an audience member visiting from LA “started to feel dizzy and made his way to the aisle. But he lost consciousness and collapsed before the end of his row.”

The show was halted, and paramedics were called and took him to the lobby. “When he regained consciousness, they checked his vitals and insisted he should go straight to the hospital,” the source said. The guy refused, exclaiming, “I’d sooner die than miss Act 2!” Producer Scott Rudin even invited him to come see the show again.

Hands up if you think this guy is family.

  • Gustav2
  • Kruhn

    Show of hands, how many of you think the collapsing patron is gay? Only one of us would be so hard core about Hello Dolly .

    • Skokieguy [Larry]

      So hard core about Bette Fucking Midler.

      • canoebum

        Her performance for the families of the fallen firefighters and police after 9/11 is forever etched in my mind. I only saw her one time on stage, Clams on the Half Shell. I have seen her on the streets of New York.

        • gothambear

          Her performance on Broadway a few years ago as agent Sue Mengers in “I’ll Eat You Last” was sheer transformational genius

      • perversatile
        • Skokieguy [Larry]

          Yes, have read it.

    • Gustav2

      Or Bette.

    • popebuck1

      About the stage version, anyway. I remember an interview with the director of WALL-E where he sheepishly apologized for, in the snippet of “It Only Takes A Moment” that we see in that film, editing in a close-up of Cornelius and Irene holding hands that didn’t actually occur. He seemed convinced that Dolly purists would be after him.

      I was like, honey, no one who’s that passionate about “Hello, Dolly!” is going to get that worked up over that MOVIE version…

      • Zollergasse

        I think the film is probably viewed more favourably today than it was back in the day. Streisand may have been too young to play Dolly Levi but in my opinion nobody before or since has sung that score so magnicifently. She soars. Having said that, I remember Larry King talking to Carol Channing about losing the film to Streisand. Channing said of Streisand: “Well, she was
        probably the greatest creative force of our whole century. She’s a
        terrific thing and she’s unique and she’s Barbra. But a barrel of
        laughs she ain’t.”

        • popebuck1

          I went back and rewatched the movie recently, after reading about its troubled production in Matthew Kennedy’s “Roadshow! The Fall of Film Musicals in the 1960s.” I agree that while it IS a bloated mess and a huge waste of resources (building six full blocks of NYC streets that flash by in seconds!), it’s nowhere near as bad as its reputation would suggest. The filming went so awfully, with basically no one speaking to each other by the end, that everyone was ready to disown it the second it came out.

    • Rex

      His statement of not wanting to leave outed him to the world.

    • Strepsi

      Forget Hello Dolly, it’s all there in “I’d sooner die”. Not “no, thanks” but “I’D SOONER DIE!”

  • Doggidaddi
    • Todd20036

      Honestly, if I had to, I’d fuck Hitler before I’d fuck Trump.
      And I’m a Jew.

  • Skokieguy [Larry]

    Understandable, understandable
    Yes, it’s perfectly understandable
    Comprehensible, comprehensible
    Not a bit reprehensible, it’s so defensible

    • Blargg

      No face journeys!

  • Anastasia Beaverhousen

    Saturday night can’t get here quick enough… So excited!

    • Skokieguy [Larry]

      Many of us will be looking forward to you and your friend’s review.

      • Anastasia Beaverhousen

        Thanks Honey… theater birthday week is almost here! My favorite time of the year!

        • Skokieguy [Larry]

          Actually my B day is a little over a week away, so this Saturday I’m buying myself a Murano convertible. A little late to the mid-life crisis party, but better late than never. I will think of you (okay and Bette – JEALOUS!) when I drive home topless…

          • Anastasia Beaverhousen

            Actually mine is next Thursday and big theatre week starts on next Wednesday with Hamilton, Kinky Boots (3x), The Great Comet (onstage 2x) and finally Saturday Bette. I just saw The Play That Goes Wrong, Sunset Blvd and War Paint last week and this week. Happy Birthday, Larry, I need you to come and have a drink with all of us!

          • Skokieguy [Larry]

            Hon, wish I could and what a week you have planned. By the way, the latest I’ve seen is “Spamilton” have you seen it? LOVE LOVE LOVE

          • Anastasia Beaverhousen

            i have in on my iPod. I may try to sneak it in next week or when I am back in town.

          • M Jackson

            Girl we need to talk.
            Wasn’t Dame Glenn Close magnificent? When that spotlight hit her and she sang “I’ve come home at last!”, I still have chills.
            Love “Great Comet”, 2x on B’way and originally in the tent downtown. The design for B’way is just stunning, you’re going to be sitting in style up on that stage.
            I have “War Paint” coming up. Also “Amelie” and “Groundhog Day”, “Little Foxes” w/ Laura Linney and Cynthia Nixon, and “The Price” w/ Mark Ruffalo (woof) and Danny DeVito.

          • Anastasia Beaverhousen

            Glenn Close was fantastic, still not my favorite show ever, but she was glorious and so was the song. Have seen Comet once already onstage in a banquette by myself. Taking husbands and 7 friends with me to see it again. We have the entire banquette on stage. War Paint, was eh. La LaPone was magnificent, however. The Play That Goes Wrong is hysterical. Saw it a few nights ago.

          • M Jackson

            Full disclosure — my partner is a theater critic for a local paper and a member of the Drama Desk, I’m an ex-actor who gets to see everything as his +1.
            Otherwise I do the Today Tix app. I’ve won lotteries to “If I Forget” at Roundabout and “Gently Down The Stream” at The Public in the last week.
            I have a lucrative job the night he sees “The Play” but I’ll definitely go on a Today Tix discount. I love those British farces.

          • Elizabethmruiz

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj177d:
            On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
            ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash177HomeLineGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!mj177d:….,….

          • olandp

            Fuck! I didn’t know they made it in a convertible! I just bought a RAV4 hybrid. If only I’d known!

          • Skokieguy [Larry]

            Did you google pics? The auto industry hated it, but its AWD, big, and you can get great deals. They only made them for 4 years.

        • M Jackson

          “Come From Away”, “Come From Away”, “Come From Away”.
          You’re welcome.

          • Anastasia Beaverhousen

            I am not sure this is my style. It for some reason reminds me of “Fun Home.” It should have been called “No much Fun Home.”

          • M Jackson

            I loved “Fun Home” but it’s apples to oranges when compared to “Come From Away”. This is a genuine crowd-pleaser, funny and moving and uplifting. The closest things I could compare it to would be the sweet “Hands On A Hardbody” or “Waitress”, except add more standing and cheering from the audience.
            I saw it at a press preview that was obviously padded with a lot of theater professionals (all greeting each other and hob-nobbing before the show) and I have never seen an audience leap to their feet at the curtain call. We were all crying and cheering, I was actually waving at the cast of 12 and blowing them kisses.
            This musical is a funny warm uplifting gift.
            I should be writing their press releases!

    • M Jackson

      Enjoy! I have a $140 balcony single in July. Can’t miss this one.

  • TuuxKabin

    Come on! For Joe! Shelly! For the Divine Mz. M! For The Dolly. If this isn’t a recommended thread than nothing else is.


  • bdsmjack

    Hahahaha! Too funny!

  • Stogiebear
    • -M-
      • JCF

        Dear Fr Leonard: I hope he finds (illegal, $%#&$!!!) love…

      • J V

        Sorry, what’s this from?

        • -M-

          British/PBS Mystery show ‘Grantchester’. About a cop and a hunky local vicar teaming up to solve crime in the 1950s.

          The skinny dark haired guy with the book is a gay character, Leonard. The other guy in the collar is the hunky haunted jazz loving vicar of Grantchester, Sidney Chambers.

          • J V

            Never heard of it! Thanks.

          • -M-

            No problem. I only heard of it from someone else mentioning it here months ago. And that fey young priest reminded me of Leonard.

  • Mark

    Shirley Booth!!!

  • David Milley

    My chorus has a party going to the show in June. I’ll take my smelling salts.

  • JT

    Hello, Dolly! And good-bye, gurney! I’m still glowin’, I’m still crowin’, I’m still goin’ strong!

    • David Walker

      All right! Now the stair bit!

  • Texndoc

    LA Times: “The show debuts at New York’s Shubert Theatre on Wednesday and will open officially on April 20.”

    Wonder why they do that with revivals. It’s not like “well, that song doesn’t work” with a musical that’s like 50 years old. I was looking for some reviews but I guess they aren’t written until it’s “official”.

  • greenmanTN

    Hail to the queen! 😉

  • jefe5084

    Always glad to see the feisty Divine Miss M continue on her journey.

  • Robincho

    Now THIS, ladies and gentlemen, is what’s known as a Badass Broadway Queen!…

    • David Walker

      But how could one not get the vapors?

  • CharlestonDave

    For those on Twitter, @BetteMidler is a great follow. Sharp, wicked and witty, just like you’d expect. And boy howdy does she get in the digs on Trump. Typical Bette tweet:

    Hope Trump is watching the news so he learns it’s not spelled “wiretapp.” I know he enjoys a little extra “p” though.

  • normadesmond

    Now THAT’S feel good news!

  • WiscoJoe

    This could be a Seinfeld episode. Guy collapses at a Bette Midler Show. Refuses to leave. Everyone speculates he’s gay… Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  • Lindoro Almaviva

    I know where my friend Ronizetti was last night!!!!! LOL.

  • JoyZeeBoy

    My sweet Boo and I saw it last Saturday night. It was FABULOUS!!!! Simply put (which the tv ads have been doing) twenty years from now there will be two kinds of people… those who saw Bette Midler in Hello Dolly… and those who SAY they saw Bette Midler in Hello Dolly. If I live that long, I’ll be in the first category. I wish I could say the same thing about “Merrily We Roll Along” and “Moose Murders.”

  • DAMN! The Show Must Go On!

  • metrored

    Whoever this man is, he should stand up and take a bow.

    • Steven

      we got a standing ovation when we walked back in for Act 2…..and several requests for selfies….lol

      • metrored


      • metrored

        Honestly this made my morning. I hope you are okay though.

      • JCF

        I trust your encore was at the hospital, hon.

    • Lumpy Gaga

      For God’s sake, let him stay seated and do the Queen’s wave!!

  • JCF

    “I’d sooner die than miss Act 2!” {wig toss}

    That said: for willing to DIE!!1!!1 for The Theatuh (Diva)—