Trump To Hold First Re-Election Rally On Saturday

Florida Politics reports:

President Donald Trump will be holding a rally in Melbourne Saturday afternoon in what is essentially a re-election campaign stop being promoted by his campaign. Team Trump-Pence, the successor to Donald J. Trump for President, announced the president’s rally will be at a 5 p.m. event at the AeroMod International Hanger at Orlando Melbourne International Airport.

The appearance presumably is on his way for his weekly weekend visit to Mar-a-Lago in Palm Beach. It also comes hours after SpaceX will be making the first launch of a Falcon 9 rocket from the historic Launch Complex 39A at Kennedy Space Center a few miles up the coast, fueling speculation that the president might also make a space center and take in the historic launch during visit during his time in Brevard County.

I reserved two tickets just to fuck with their planning. According to some sources, Trump has been feeling “cooped up” at Mar-A-Lago and may have asked for the rally just to bolster his ego.

  • another_steve

    Vomit alert.

    I won’t be watching.

  • fuzzybits
    • Ribb Rotgut

      What is this from?

      • Thorn Spike

        I think it’s how Charlie dies in Two and A Half Men.

        • Reality.Bites

          Yes, last scene in final episode

        • CottonBlimp

          Seriously? I didn’t realize that show was so brutal.

  • HZ81

    And our national shame spiral continues to… spiral.

    Can’t wait for the Make America Great Again white hoods and key-chains.

  • Steven B

    WTF is a “re-election” rally?

    • Gustav2

      He has looked at his approval ratings and figured he better start campaigning now?

      • Todd20036

        Not a bad guess, but that requires a lot more forward thinking on his part that I doubt is possible.

    • another_steve

      Perhaps he’ll allude to his penis size.

      His base likes that.

      • Uncle Mark

        That…and another chorus of “Don’t cry for me, Mar-a-Lago”

        • another_steve

          Lol. Love that. πŸ˜‰

          Mar-a-Lago has an interesting history, made all the more interesting by the Sexual Predator-in-Chief’s involvement.

          More, here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mar-a-Lago

        • TuuxKabin

          Is it ‘Mar-a-Largo’, or Mar-a-Lardo?”

        • cleos_mom

          Melanoma will have to sing that one. She’ll ask Michelle Obama for help with the lyrics.

    • Something that, if this was a normal sane human being, wouldn’t happen until late in 2019.

      But Donad’s wee fee-fees are feeling hurt and he needs an ego-bump.

      • Uncle Mark

        He can’t get it up, unless there are people cheering in the room for him.

        • JaniceInToronto

          EGOVENTS!

        • Stephen Elliot Phillips

          Or urinating prostitutes

          • cleos_mom

            Might be a good idea for audience participation at the rallies.

        • Acronym Jim

          Who can tell either way?

    • Uncle Mark

      He’s been suffering a lot from electile dysfunction lately. His numbers and moral keep flopping. He’s desperately needy for the cheering and adoration that he used to get from his rallies.

      • Nowhereman

        He takes Propecia for his hair loss, and aside from paranoia, insomnia and brain fog, other side effects include loss of libido, erectile dysfunction and the inability to climax. He should just face the facts and get a good quality hair cut that makes the best out of whatever he has left.

        • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

          Jeez.
          I’d rather be bald!

    • GeneInSJ

      I don’t know but I have 2 tickets!

      • Nowhereman

        Are they worth anything?

      • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

        Scan them for the lulz!

    • Ninja0980

      A reminder to our side that are elections coming up that the base needs to turn out and vote for.

      • cleos_mom

        Maybe this time out no one will be mistaking the Independent Party for voting for an independent candidate.

    • clay

      A way to re-fill the coffers of your Super-PAC before you need to turn it into a legal defence fund (or, “foundation” as Donnie would stammer).

  • Skokieguy [Larry]

    Trump clearly wants to render the left speechless. Little makes my jaw drop but this is just stunning.

    • mpatreyu

      I rather like dropping my jaw but I don’t think we are talking about the same thing

  • Rebecca Gardner
    • Todd20036

      Please. Don’t be stupid.

      Be a Smartie.

      • Rebecca Gardner

        You don’t see the parallels?

        • Todd20036

          I was quoting Mel Brooks.
          Don’t be stupid, be a smartie. Come and join the Nazi Party.
          From his music video, Heil Myself! (It’s actually a pretty funny video)

          • Rebecca Gardner

            LOL! I totally forget that line. I thought maybe I was off base and was curious for your input. Now I am laughing. Thank you.

          • It’s a good thing you’re a woman because we were totally going to take away your gay card for missing a standard musical theater reference! πŸ˜‰

          • HozillaSmallpox
          • In for a penny. . .
            https://youtu.be/WSEMshf_tN0

          • Todd20036

            I forgot how hot the backup dancers were

          • No joke. I’m pretty sure the cutest one was in “Beat It.”

          • MusicBear88

            “And now it’s…
            Springtime for Trumpler and ‘Murica,
            Red states are happy and gay
            We’re blasting off to outer space
            We rigged the presidential race.

            Springtime for Trumpler and ‘Murica (look, it’s springtime!)
            Winter for Hill’ry and all,
            Springtime for Trumpler and ‘Murica
            Now get going and build the new wall!”

      • liondon#iamnotatraitor

        Your attention… I crave it!

    • JT

      Nuremberg is already booked. They checked.

      • TampaDink

        Donnie is doubly disappointed, he was hoping to grab Angela Merkel’s pussy during his first month in office.

    • Nowhereman

      Here’s a sneak preview of our next 4th of July parade:

      • Jamoche

        Disqus doesn’t grok embed codes; just paste the url.

        • Nowhereman

          I thought I had. OOPs.

    • Anastasia Beaverhousen
    • dagobarbz, fine Italian shoes

      The one thing lacking here is protesters. There aren’t any.

  • Todd20036

    Because trying to prove he’s popular is so much more important than running the country.
    Right?
    Well considering he would run the country into the ground, I’m not against this.

    • Uncle Mark

      Shouldn’t all this alleged winning make him popular enough?

      • Todd20036

        Meh. People are getting tired of all the winning.

        • Nowhereman

          I know I sure am.

  • MikeBoston

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d3c690f91aff5c22179daece37c4c5dd50c52591827e849b383d1045a531b068.jpg

    Is this like the scene in Soapdish when Whoopi takes Sally to the mall to feel the love?

    • Gustav2

      Just like that.

    • JoeMyGod

      I actually looked for that clip for this post. No luck.

    • MattPS

      Another Soapdish fan! You just come here and sit down by me, you!

  • BlindBill

    taxpayer financed travel to a re-election rally …. maybe he should be a bit worried about still being in office a month from now – but you can get more of those tax-free political donations if you start early – let the money begs commence.

    • Rebecca Gardner

      I, personally, am looking forward to my tax dollars going towards keeping him in ADX Florence for the rest of his life.

      • Stogiebear

        I, personally (and constitutionally), am looking forward to the amount of your tax dollars being spent on that finding its limits in front of a firing squad.

      • Reality.Bites

        Penalty for treason is death

    • Ray Taylor

      I doubt very much he will be running for re-election. He has to do campaign now or he never will.

  • Jon Doh

    Well now we know when and where he can be arrested for treason.

  • Uncle Mark

    “The courts and the fake news have been depressing me.” “Bring my fools and my peasants to my balcony, so they may cheer for me.”

    • Stogiebear

      When that no longer gets his pecker to twitch he’ll institute public executions at his Ego Events.

      • JaniceInToronto

        Oh! Oh! New word! EGOVENTS!

        Used like this:

        “Trump will be attending his egovent dressed as a clam.”

    • zhera

      Question is though, now that he’s in the White House, will he be able to get people excited about rallies? What’s the point now? I suspect, and HOPE, that there will be a rather small crowd and he’ll cancel due to some made up crisis.

      • thatotherjean

        Trump’s doing such a grand job as President that people are going to come out and cheer for him? Somehow, I doubt it. He should be concerned with staying in office this election cycle, instead of running for the next one. The man is delusional, incompetent, and his ego is very, very fragile. The sooner he’s out, the better.

      • Gerry Fisher

        I’m thinking of the tRump supporter who was bummed out about the rainy inauguration and the women’s march the next day: “I thought it would be fun, like his rallies.”

      • Frostbite

        what? no. it will be packed! with paid supporters!

      • Nick in Pasadena

        A rally at this point is just red meat for the resistance. I wouldn’t be surprised if more protestors showed up than supporters. I sure hope there’s enough security on hand.

  • JoeMyGod

    By the way, the actual Orlando International Airport (MCO) is suing the Melbourne airport for using “Orlando” in their name. Melbourne is 90 minutes southeast of Orlando on the coast.

    • You’d think the FAA would have something to say about this.

      • That_Looks_Delicious

        We can’t talk. Our airport in Palm Springs is named after Sonny Bono. As gay as this town is, you would think it would be named after Cher.

        • cleos_mom

          Almost balances out the desecration of one of DC’s airports via its renaming.

  • Blake Mason

    It will play out something like this…https://youtu.be/XJKeeBLVj1c?t=888

    • Bj Lincoln

      This is a great movie. Thanks.

  • Ragnar Lothbrok
    • fuzzybits

      Awww. I’ll be scooping the litter boxes while it’s on.

    • bambinoitaliano

      Me too. Super busy. Someone has to keep an eye on the fire place.
      https://youtu.be/RDfjXj5EGqI

    • another_steve

      I know dogs and I know cats. Love them all.

      Cats are very tolerant of dogs, their “challenged” brethren.

      • vorpal

        Cats are gifted.
        Dogs are special.
        There is a difference :-).

    • GeneInSJ

      That’s the line I use when someone tells me to “Have A Blessed Day”.

      • Ragnar Lothbrok

        LOL – totally!

    • Acronym Jim

      You’re going to be licked by cows?

  • HZ81
    • another_steve

      Gurl… nuttin’ shocks, anymore.

      • HZ81

        Oh, finding a racist in this administration is like finding a fly on dog shit.

        They just there.

  • Stogiebear

    Worthless lazy shithead.

  • PickyPecker
    • fuzzybits

      They were promised pancakes.

      • Rebecca Gardner

        …and scooter recharging stations.

    • William

      “Please clap.”

  • Lazycrockett

    I assume the Women Marchers are already organizing a protest rally?!

  • Tawreos

    Sooner or later the protesters will outnumber the supporters and he will stop having them.

    • Bj Lincoln

      We can hope.

  • Natty Enquirer

    You loved the first 25 days … Help us get ready for the next 2,895!

    • Gianni

      Nothing like being slammed with really depressing, eye-opening, real news. πŸ™‚

  • -M-

    Because that’s normal.

    • Bj Lincoln

      I know you are being snarky and I appreciate your humor. That said, NO! It is anything but NORMAL! I don’t want to pay for or watch 4 fucking years of his ‘re-election’ bull shit! Him and his friends have made too may issues ‘normal’ that make me sick. The last election was already way too fucking long! I am so ready to leave. If Canada wasn’t so damn cold I would head there but I am getting to the point I would head south to Mexico just to get out of here.

  • Rebecca Gardner
    • William

      Donald needs to start learning the tap codes. McCain could teach those, if he and Trump could get along.

  • FAEN

    Say what??

  • bambinoitaliano

    Barely a month in, poor cheetolini is reminiscing his good old days. Specifically his sugar daddy Putin came through with his promised of ushering him into the White House back in November.

  • Sam_Handwich
  • ‘May have asked for this to bolster his ego’?

    You can bet your ass that’s what this is for. Baby Donnie’s had a really shitty several weeks, punctuated with repeated disappointments and blows to his oh-so-squishy pathologically narcissistic ego.

    He is DESPERATE for adulation and cheers, to the point where last weekend during his 2nd straight vacay in office, he decided to warp reality so that protesters were supporters.

    What’s even worse is a large portion of the expenses for this ego-fluffing exercise will be paid by us. The taxpayers of America.

    • Bj Lincoln

      I agree. Is there anything we can do to stop him? We are spending a ton on the Tower and Mar-a-lago as it is. Do we really have to pay for 4 years of ‘re-election’ ego trips?!

    • -M-

      And part of it will be paid into his pocket.

    • Gianni

      Well put! This is all about stroking and stoking his delicate ego. “DESPERATE for adulation and cheers” – right on! That’s the one and only reason for these shenanigans. Without Melania in his bed every night, he really needs a huge dose of being told and shown how wonderful he is. He’s been without for a while.

  • How exciting! It will be his first pre-impeachment rally!!

  • AtticusP

    This is what you do when you are king of bizarro world.

    All hail the king!

    • james1200

      This is so fucking batshit crazy, all of it, that I’m just sitting here at my desk laughing. This is most definitely alternate universe shit. This can NOT be happening in real life!

  • JohnJay

    Re-election rally? Really? That means we’re in the 2020 campaign. That means no more Supreme Court nominations until after the next presidential election. Can’t do that during the election process! Remember?

    • Scribble Writer 🌹 ☭

      Hahahaha >.<

    • Bj Lincoln

      As far as I know it is the last year of the term that’s known as the ‘lame duck’ and that’s when a President can’t make appointments. I like your idea better.
      What they did to Obama was BS because it is more of a guide than a rule.

      • That’s a misuse of the term lame duck. I know it’s been used that way over the past decade or so but what that really means is someone who is still in office but not serving another term. So basically between the election and the first of the year or inauguration day (depending on the office).

        • Bj Lincoln

          Thanks for the correction. Good to know.

        • lymis

          Exactly. Lame duck means someone else has been elected, but your term isn’t over. NOT that your term is inevitably going to come to an end eventually.

      • Rex

        He was lame long before he set foot in the Oval Office.

        • Nowhereman

          Walks like a duck…

          • Mike Knife

            Looks like a duck…….

          • Misutaa Roboto

            Trump duck.

          • Mike Knife

            Duck Trump

          • Ginatkrebs

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj492d:
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          • Exatron

            We have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.

          • Erinjdelarosa

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      • cleos_mom

        If it’s more a guide than a rule, can’t is a slight exaggeration.

    • clay

      It means we’re in the 2020 campaign, or he’s anticipating having to survive a recall special election (not that one yet exists for the presidency, he is the unprecedent, however).

      • William

        Trump will have died from a massive stroke long before then.

        • BlueberriesForMe

          Not poisoned by Putie/Bannie?

          • Andymac3

            Or Kim Jong-un

    • Nowhereman

      I say that if a democratic president is no longer allowed to name a Supreme Court justice in their last year, then a republican president will not be allowed to name one in their first year. OR their last. Or the two years in between.

    • Paul David

      Exactly.

      How childish is this president?

      I mean, seriously…this is CLEARLY being scheduled because poor, poor Donnie feels that he hasn’t been getting enough positive feedback!

      And we all know he won the election! So everyone should bow down and spend the next 4 years fellating him! He deserves that! He needs that!

      I don’t think we’ve had a more psychologically-broken–and pathetically transparent–president in my lifetime (I’m in my 30s).

      I mean…Dubya was plainly a moronic fratboy who subcontracted out the running of his administration to Cheney and the neocons. But at least he was just stupid and disinterested…not plainly psychologically unbalanced.

      Trump is a completely different beast…I mean, we have a man-child who is in his 70s (!!!!!!!!) running the country. The sheer childishness is just beyond words….

      • Phil in Colorado

        Well said!

        • Dawngwills

          Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj276:
          On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
          !mj276:
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  • Carl

    He hates working a shift, but man does he get fired up for job interviews.

  • bambinoitaliano
    • bambinoitaliano
      • bambinoitaliano
        • bambinoitaliano

          These series of tweet is in response to Bill Maher inviting Milo turd to Real Time With Bill Maher.

          • Ribb Rotgut

            If you’re lying and calling everyone to the right of you a “Nazi” who wants genocide, which Milo is obviously not, then you give justification for everyone who says “it’s ok to hit a Nazi (or worse)” to be violent against them. You are the deplorable fascist.

          • William

            Milo should be subject to a media blackout. Or a whiteout, if the term “blackout” makes him feel uncomfortable.

  • SockMikey

    Some elucidation?

    Is “Re-Election” a term and vehicle to revisit and rehash his disproved claims of losing the popular vote due to 3 million illegal aliens and tout his “landslide” electoral victory or targeting 2020?

    I think he feels emasculated to an extent by not being able to totally get his way and the realities of governmental process. He’s also been ridiculed for his buffoonery, management style and his ability to surround himself with the “very best people”.

    His derision and name-calling of those that question or challenge him has lost much of it’s efficacy as continued exposure to venom’s and poisons engender resistance.

    His attempts to misdirect and his minions obfuscation are wearing thin and not working as well as the good ‘ole days of his campaign.

    Legislators are more and more being seen as abdicating their constitutional duties and their touted “principals” in order to put forward agendas.

    I think this planned jerk-off party will just be more of the same.

    Democrats/Independents are being given a silver-platter opportunity and should start now and keep at it hard to put people (Men/Women/Minorities) that reflect the spirit of America and have the ability to win.

    Many of us have always voted as a matter or consciousness.

    Our votes are more important than ever due to the fact that we must also hold hands with others that may not be us whose freedoms and liberties are in danger.

    • It’s simple, really. Donald is feeling all sad and ego-damaged because people don’t love him and have been letting him know it. He’s also sad because people aren’t falling all over themselves to declare him President-for-Life by acclamation. He’s had several set-backs, politically and personally, and the many leaks have made him look like a hapless, hopeless, sub-literate, Russia-collaborating, easily-manipulated moron, which isn’t hard because that’s what he is.

      The rally, a large portion of the costs for will be borne by U.S. taxpayers, is for no other reason than to make Donald feel better. Because he’s desperate to be told he’s liked and to be cheered.

      This is basically end-stage pathological narcissistic psychosis. No wonder he’s wandering the WH in his robe, obsessively watching cable TV for any and all mentions of himself.

      • Gianni

        The robe is still in question.

        • Not really. Lots of photos over the years. He likes robes, esp. white fluffy terrycloth. But he doesn’t like the idea *now* of people imagining him schlubbing around the WH, un-business suited, like Nixon in his final days.

      • William

        How long until he starts wearing Kleenex boxes on his feet?

      • Nowhereman

        Yeah, but Spicer says he doesn’t even own a bathrobe. I guess he just wanders the halls in his boxers. Not a pretty thought.

  • kelven

    Smells like desperation.

  • TampaDink

    His adoring “fans” at his winter palace (which I expect he will use in spring, summer & fall for his weekend getaways) are too sedate. He craves the rage that he can only get from his poor fans.

    • Nowhereman

      And we-the-people get to pay to provide the cost of Air Force One flights for his personal use at least once a week, security at his Mara Lago place and Trump Tower in addition to the actual and REAL White House that we have already provided him with. Any complaints from the right about how much his golfing and galavanting around are costing us? Crickets.

      • TampaDink

        Of course we will pay for his weekly travels to Florida…just like we paid for the Obama family to travel to Hawaii every week. /sarcasm.

        • Nowhereman

          I’m surprised The Donald doesn’t get shuttled back to Trump Tower every night.

          • TampaDink

            He has people looking into that, I’m sure.

          • Jukesgrrl

            I was actually expecting that. Helicopter from White House lawn to NYC rooftop landing pad. Maybe the Secret Service nixed it as too risky.

    • JaniceInToronto

      EGOVENTS! (Sorry, I’m really wanting this word to be a thing…)

      • TampaDink

        You are on to something, Janice. Egovents will become a standard description of presidential outings. I most look forward to the egovents held in court rooms.

    • Nowhereman

      Even his fans are beginning to see the chinks in his armor.

      • TampaDink

        And they do not like them or any other minorities…so they’re not happy with these developments.

        • Nowhereman

          Took me a minute…

          • TampaDink

            My original reply made it more clear….but I reworded it, lest I be perceived to be a racist piece of shit.

  • Nowhereman

    This is a joke, right? Right?

  • PeedeResistance

    This is a joke, right?

    • Nowhereman

      I just said that exact thing. Any bets on how outraged the GOPTP congress will be by his expensive life style? And if he’s using Air Force One to go to basically campaign events, shouldn’t he be paying us back?

  • TestSubject51

    Ridiculous.

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    Damn, where’s my Brown shirt?

  • Leo

    #TheFloridaResistance’s practically done protests each DAY outside Mar-a-lago.

    They’ll be out in force – even with this little notice, I can assure you.

  • That_Looks_Delicious

    ‘ I’m telling you -again- he’s a cokehead. He’s going down to Florida every weekend to get his supply away from the cameras of the White House reporters.’

    — Carrie Fisher screaming at us from heaven

  • Jean-Marc in Canada

    Hey 45, you know who else had Summer and Winter palaces? It didn’t end well for him either.

  • HZ81

    Breaking: Trump is talking about putting troops on the ground in Syria.

    Support the troopsβ€”straight into their graves.

  • teeveedub

    Hey, Lord Dampnut: before you ask the nation to extend your contract, how about you a) stop fucking up the country, and b) have at least one actual accomplishment.

  • TestSubject51
    • Walter Maerlyn

      Chronic gesticulator.

  • Reality.Bites

    I guess Nurenberg wasn’t available for the rally

  • Slippy_World
  • TampaDink

    Remember when President Obama took vacation trips 3 out of the 4 first weekends he was in office? Yeah, me neither.

    • I have a feeling that until he’s drummed out of office, weekends where he doesn’t take yet another Florida vacation will be the exception.

      • TampaDink

        I suspect that you are right….although during warmer months, he might shake things up by going to NYC on some weekends.

      • Gianni

        Does Melania accompany him to Florida each weekend?

        • William

          What, leave the kid home alone?

      • Stogiebear

        Soon these will turn into 3, 4, 5, and 6 day weekends. In addition to being an entry level position, precedenting is just a part time jerb.

  • Benny S.

    Possibly good news ahead. In many blue state governments (I live in Oregon), many state lawmakers are trying to pass a law where future presidential candidates must submit his / her tax returns before they are allowed to be on the state’s ballot for future elections.

  • Cuberly
    • William

      “We welcome our new Russian overlords.”

      • Lars Littlefield

        I don’t. I hate Borscht. It’s purple!

        • William

          Pirozhki are nice, right out of the oven.

          • PickyPecker

            I make those several times per winter and serve with a nice barscht. πŸ™‚

          • William

            I can’t stand beets. Two times in Russia and I never saw anything beet related.

          • PickyPecker

            Mmmm. They’re a staple in Poland. I learned to make some wonderful beet dishes when I was there.

          • William

            I don’t recall ever seeing any beets in Poland either. If I decide to visit the old family villages, I may have to come up with a diplomatic way to avoid beets. Maybe spring is too early in the year for beets.

          • Lars Littlefield

            For putting in your pockets so your hands don’t get frostbite.

          • William

            Potato pirozhki will keep you fueled up for a walk through a blizzard.

    • As I noted in another comment, that spy ship is now loitering off the coast of CT, not at all far from Groton, which has a U.S. submarine base.

      Reaction from Donald or anyone else in the WH or even the Republicans? Crickets.

      • Jeffg166

        It’s a cash drop.

  • Daveed_WOW

    Counter-rally please

    • Better: Apply for tickets and go to the rally itself. Donald should find out what an increasing majority of Americans really feel about him.

  • Sam_Handwich

    CNN reporting that DoD is considering plans to send ground forces to Syria.

    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      Oh crap!!

    • andrew

      This Navy Veteran wishes that a large number of the young men and women serving in our military would tell the politicians in D.C., No. We are not going to continue to allow you armchair warriors to continue to waste our lives and health in these futile and needless wars in the Middle East. Hell no. We won’t go.

      • lymis

        It’s up to us veterans and to the family members of those servicemembers to do that. It’s really asking a lot to ask the serving people to take that kind of step.

  • JaniceInToronto

    I want to run the brick concession!

    • Earl

      I’ve already called dibs on the rotten egg concession.

  • William

    This sounds like the perfect time for a mass mooning.

  • boobert

    I liked the line when Netanyahu called him big. We all know he meant fat! lol

  • popebuck1

    Shouldn’t he make sure he really got elected the FIRST time, first?

  • MonochromeMouse

    I reserved 2 tickets and volunteered, you all should do the same, tickets are first come first serve and once they’re all reserved that’s it.
    **EDIT** once you do make sure you block/report the numbers on your phone and the emails as spam so that they can’t harass you with propaganda.

  • Cuberly
    • Earl

      Great way to get the impeachment talk off of the table, eh?

      Just send a few thousand kids off to kill and die.

  • Matt

    Dude, you won’t make it to the end of the year, let along “re-election.” I see handcuffs in your future.

  • fuzzybits
  • JT

    β€˜He will die in jail’: Intelligence community ready to β€˜go nuclear’ on Trump, senior source says

    Let’s move!

    • Lars Littlefield

      You’re just teasing me. Don’t get my hopes up. That’s mean.

  • JHunter
    • Earl

      They’re crazier than Donald is.

    • ChrisMorley

      Russia obviously won’t accidently bomb them.

  • safari

    Addict.

  • BobSF_94117

    Before you faux-reserve tickets, consider which is better: sold-out or no interest?

    • kanehau

      Sold out… and nobody shows up.

      • Earl

        The ones who do show up, carry veggies and rotten eggs.

        Then the SS refuses to let anyone in at all. πŸ™‚

        • Jukesgrrl

          That might work. It isn’t against the law to have a pocket full of eggs even if they could use it to bar you.

      • BobSF_94117

        Nobody signs up, nobody shows up.

        Clearly better.

  • Tiger Quinn

    Rallies. A month into this shitshow and he’s still jerking off to crowd sizes.

  • Lars Littlefield

    Awww, the poor, deceitful, orange shit gibbon needs a little rah rah pick-me-up? He’s still unsure whether or not he won the presidency? Sad.

  • bambinoitaliano
    • Cuberly

      Cummings can be so damn funny.

    • That_Looks_Delicious

      ROFLMAO

  • Cuberly

    For those that still have unyielding approval and excitement for Donnie. Here’s your special commemorative #MAGA jacket!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cda796eae93b6cc5f4d70baad0360fa8b364c6cfe8ea3b499442d1eb1ece0f40.jpg

    • Robincho

      Damn strait!…

      • Cuberly

        ….jack!

        (it)

  • TimJ

    What?! It isn’t a re-election rally, it is an anti-impeachment rally.

    • Gianni

      Point taken. I think you’re right. Possible that a bit of actual fear is creeping into dreams?

  • CB

    How much are these weekend jaunts costing the taxpayers?

    • safari

      Over $3 million each.

  • Halou

    “It also comes hours after SpaceX will be making the first launch of a Falcon 9 rocket …… ”
    Something for which Trump will, without the slightest sense of awareness whatsoever, be taking credit. Just like he took credit for the unemployment statistics he spent the entire election campaign dismissing, just like he asserted all corporate investments in America since 2015 were actually a result of him telling companies what to do (take that Capitalism!). Trump will no doubt be claiming he is solely responsible for creating the economic conditions by which a South African-born Canadian-American citizen could make and launch spaceships.

    • Gianni

      SpaceX should give him a complimentary free ride on this launch. Be the first President in space, the real outer space I mean, not the vacuum his mind routinely inhabits.

      • Halou

        Single ticket or return?

  • ETownCanuck

    His supporters are all fairly lazy. It would be hilarious if they all felt that they have already done enough just by getting him elected and don’t bother to show up to this.

  • Jerry Kott

    He misses the roar of the crowd? He doesn’t like being President, he likes being adored. Sad sad sad asshole, but we will be paying the price.

  • That_Looks_Delicious
    • safari

      “He will die in jail” has a nice ring to it.

      • Lumpy Gaga

        “Say it soft and it almost sounds like praying…”

    • Treant

      They’re aware that this is not safe, not normal, and not acceptable. Expect this to detonate far faster than Watergate did.

      • safari

        Dan Rather alluded to such yesterday.

        • Treant

          I dearly hope it’s over by Easter. Those who say we have a year before fascism is inevitable are wrong.

          • Earl

            The end of the month is in 19 days, I think that should be enough time. Right?

            Sooner would be nicer, but get him off of that Presidential pot before he shits in it. πŸ™‚

          • Jukesgrrl

            But then we have Pence and a Congress full of his ilk. That’s just a more tasteful, quiet Fascism.

          • Treant

            I have less fear of nuclear war or canceled elections. The risk of voter suppression is, of course, about the same.

          • TampaDink

            We have those already, anyhow. At least without the narcissist man child who suffers from extreme egomania & lacks all forms of self control, we have a greater chance of not being obliterated in nuclear war.

  • GayOldLady

    I just hope there are thousands of protesters on hand to screw up his day and mess with his ego.

  • Halou

    “Trump has been feeling β€œcooped up” at Mar-A-Lago”

    Man-child.
    D.C. is too cold and full of liberals. Mar-a-Lago triggers his claustrophobia. He is too much of a ‘germaphobe’ to go to Russian hotels. Can he not just suck up, grow a pair and stay in one place?

  • Cuberly
    • Treant

      We must hope for news reports afterward that begin with the words, “Florida man…”

      Those are always amusing and embarrassing for those involved.

      • Jukesgrrl

        I’d give that 10 up-votes if I could.

        • Treant

          Honestly, it sounds terribly prejudicial. Around here, “A central Pennsylvania man…” or “A rural Pennsylvania man…” means the same thing.

          It’s even odds that the quote “Hold my beer and watch this” will appear somewhere in the story.

  • boatboy_srq

    Sorry. Team (Not Worth) Tuppence should not get a pass for this. Campaigning THREE EFFING YEARS EARLY? REALLY?

    • Halou

      One possible positive of this. If he is spending three and three-quarter years campaigning for re-election, but the time 2020 comes around like a bacterial infection the country would be immunized against him. For the Dems it would be like running against an empty chair.
      https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c2/Clint_Eastwood_and_Chair.jpg

      • boatboy_srq

        This is worse than the on-again, off-again Firefly reboot, the Friends reunion and the “who’s the next Doctor” advance marketing hell COMBINED.

        And just because he’s campaigning does not mean he won’t be signing anything or taking any actions. Mar-a-Lago showed us that.

  • mikeinftl

    Doesn’t he have to get thru 4 years first?

    • Treant

      years weeks. FTFY.

  • narutomania

    File this under “presumption”. Or “lunacy”. Whichever works.

  • Tom G

    Why? Wil this boost his approval rating over 30%?

  • stuckinthewoods

    There are reasons for trump to do this.
    “it means that 501c3 (non-profit) organizations cannot work or speak
    negatively about President, who would of course be β€œcandidate” Trump.
    If they do, it is considered opposition to a candidate, and grounds for
    losing the group’s tax exempt status.”
    “Second, his FEC filing means that Trump is afforded different protections as a candidate.”
    He’ll have a nice place to stash the shake-down protection money he’ll be raising his whole term.
    http://theblacksphere.net/2017/01/trump-declares-for-2020-most-clever-move-in-politics/
    http://www.azfamily.com/story/34380443/trump-breaks-precedent-files-on-first-day-as-candidate-for-re-election
    http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2017/02/donald-trumps-2020-re-election-bid-making-him-richer

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      Bingo! I just asked about this thanks

    • Treant

      True but not true; as President, he has very little protection against negative commentary.

      Otherwise, of course, rulings could have been handed out willy-nilly against Obama’s detractors in the both 2011 and 2015. That never happens.

      • stuckinthewoods

        with him I’m sure it’s all about the money, collecting it, hiding it, using it…but mostly collecting it.

    • lymis

      I wouldn’t put it past them to try it.

      However, I’m betting on cash flow. He made a mint off running for President. If he’s actively campaigning, he can accept campaign contributions. Or at least, will claim he can.

      I wonder when he’s going to start pressuring the IRS to finish that damn audit.

  • Stephen Elliot Phillips

    Trump team has already filed re-election papers. I read/heard somewhere this makes shitgibbon immune to something or not easily sued or something.
    I know im vague. Anybody remember this? Details from somone smarter and a better memory appreciated

    • Treant

      That was the claim, but no…it means he can collect money at grifter rates as opposed to being more limited. Buying off the President? Make the full donation…and the PAC is right over here and has no such limits…

      As President, filing for re-election or not, he’s one of the least protected people in terms of rumor or criticism. That does not change, nor does his (limited) ability to be sued.

      • Stephen Elliot Phillips

        Look at stuckinthewoods comment. It also gives shithead protection from nonprofit criticism

        • Treant

          See below; in practice, it means nothing and is never enforced.

          • Stephen Elliot Phillips

            Treant….never enforced? That means it can or could be enforced if nefarious perps want to use it as a tool.
            We all know they make us play by the rules when there side gains

          • Treant

            “I was speaking about the President, not the candidate.” Easy way out of that one.

            Two, losing most non-profits wouldn’t a major issue; many are bound from taking any political action anyway.

  • Jerry Kott

    The chase is always better than the catch.

  • Professor Barnhardt

    Yeah, his ego needs bolstering, alright.

  • Sam_Handwich
    • Jukesgrrl

      Marie Antoinette had crowds, too.

      • Halou

        Let them eat bricks.

    • Stephen Elliot Phillips

      A nazi pep rally.

    • Uh huh. Or really it’s just because the pathological narcissist needs his ego fluffed.

      I’m going with explanation #2.

      • WretchedMouse

        He enjoys being watched as he verbally masturbates on stage. -shudder-

        • TampaDink

          I suspect that he literally masturbates to video coverage of his rallies & speeches.

          • WretchedMouse

            Ha! I wouldn’t put it past him. Like “who has the yughest hands, yeah you baby…mmmm who won in a..a…a…laaaaandslii…iii…de”
            https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cec1219f8bee89b05a0b492dfe386d4f9bed3a8f3ceb3a0548074613af661be3.jpg

          • TampaDink

            If he weren’t making so much money from his candidacy & the rest of his businesses, I wouldn’t be surprised to find him selling videos of his solo sex sessions.

          • WretchedMouse

            My god! Lol brand that trump stump! The best videos. Though he’d be cheap and use vhs. Heh

          • TampaDink

            He’d go cheaper than that…he’d have them recorded on previously used vhs tapes.

          • WretchedMouse

            Ah gross. Video of him going at it then at the wrong, or right time the video of Barron’s birth shows up.

          • TampaDink

            He would never have watched that video anyhow. He’s on the record of having stated that once a woman gives birth she is less sexually appealing.

          • WretchedMouse

            Ha. I think I know why. True story. Had an ex who was rather small say that I wasn’t tight enough and I was like yeah okay. Lol so that’s why trump likes them Russian child brides heh.

          • TampaDink

            His ultimate fantasy is a set of Ivanka Russian nesting dolls.

          • WretchedMouse

            Heh nesting on his lap. Heeeeyo!

          • TampaDink

            And you just know that pig would always opt for the smallest one.

          • WretchedMouse

            -shudder-

          • WretchedMouse
      • Bryan

        He didn’t say precisely that with going to his people because where’ve the crowds gone?

  • Halou

    Fuck governing the country. It was only ever about being the center of attention.

    If that’s the game then congratulations asshole, you won.

  • Jukesgrrl

    He feels “cooped up” at Mar-a-Lago? I thought he was at “the winter White House” because he felt cooped up at the real White House. How much is this costing the taxpayers? But, but, but Obama golfed!

    • ChrisMorley

      Notice how he is seeing nothing of his loving wife and 10 year old Bannon, these weekends. Such a good model dad.

      • TampaDink

        Mel has been spotted in Florida the past 2 weekends…no sign of Barron…who Hair Furor is reportedly not terribly fond of to begin with.

        • Jukesgrrl

          Yeah, why can’t Barron be more like that cute Prince George, said his father.

          • TampaDink

            Nah….his father would say “why can’t he be more like me?”.

        • Silver Badger

          How sad for Barron, who by all accounts, adores his dad.

          • TampaDink

            I suspect that he is smart enough to understand the “accounts” involved & makes it seem as if he adores his father who will probably leave him a very nice inheritance before he is an adult.

          • Silver Badger

            Speaking from experience gained many, many years ago, I Imagine that Barron actually wonders what’s wrong with him that his dad is never there and seems to prefer his siblings, Time will teach him the fault lies with his father, but it is hard for a little one to understand.

          • TampaDink

            On the preferring siblings issue, at least he has Tiffany to sympathize with….and he will inherit at a much younger age than the others.

    • stuckinthewoods

      The figure I’ve seen reported for each Florida trip is $3 million. The Palm Beach County Sheriff has also paid $1.5 million in overtime so far, as of yesterday.
      http://www.politicususa.com/2017/02/03/donald-trump-vacation-cost-estimated-3-million.html
      http://www.newser.com/story/238335/cost-of-trumps-florida-visits-in-police-overtime-15m.html

      • Jukesgrrl

        Next up to declare bankruptcy: Palm Beach County.

    • TuuxKabin

      Mar-a-Lago, or Mar-a-Lardo?

  • CB
    • Halou

      Do you have to pay for those or is it free admission?

      • Lars Littlefield

        When you go through the scanner they excise a little bit of your soul.

    • Jukesgrrl

      “No posters, banners, or signs.” I’m sure “appropriate” ones will be handed out.

      • Halou

        No ID required either so attending a Trump rally is easier than voting, which I guess is the point. Redefining the nature of American politics so it is no longer about which party you support but how loyal you are to the one-party state.

        • TampaDink

          Undocumented workers are cheaper labor, “actors” to portray adoring fans.

      • Dreaming Vertebrate

        But guns are AOK??

        • Halou

          Muh sekkind Amendmunt rites!

      • Crow on a Top Hat

        Bring a sharpie just in case.

    • Halou

      Have you tried using that ticket ID as Sean Spicer’s email password?

    • Treant

      You won first prize!

      If you’d won second prize, they’d’ve sent you six tickets.

  • William

    “Welcome to the 2017 Fail Tour”

  • Rex

    His presidency is such a rousing success so far, he won’t need to campaign.
    But his poor fragile ego needs the constant reassurance.

    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      The poor thing is already starved for attention and needs constant positive affirmation from his mindless, adoring Trumpanzees. Sad!

    • Homo Erectus

      Maybe he’ll tell us again how we’re going to get tired of winning.

  • MB

    I reserved 2 tickets for Ima Bigg Dick living in D.C.

    Anyone registered for M. Flynn’s tickets yet ?

  • Rene Salinas

    That could potentially get ugly real fast.

    • Halou

      Especially if the Russia scandal continues to be ignored.

  • Jeff Beauchaine
  • MB

    It’s official: Putzder withdraws his nomination as Laborious Sexetary.

    Andy Puzder [email protected] 34m 34 minutes ago

    I am withdrawing my nomination for Secretary of Labor. I’m honored to have been considered and am grateful to all who have supported me.

  • Tomcat

    And I suppose us taxpayers get to pay for your reelection campaign for the next 4 years.

    • andrew

      It may be wishful thinking on my part, but I don’t see how this disaster can last for four years.

    • TampaDink

      I’d much rather pay for his extended trials & eventual incarceration.

      • Crow on a Top Hat

        I read that as incineration. Oi, it’s been a long administration. 😩

        • TampaDink

          In this particular instance, I think that the two words are and should be interchangeable.

  • Halou

    Will the media finally boycott this whiny circus freak?

  • Tomcat

    Misappropriation of tax payers moneys.

  • Ted Severe

    Just reserved two tickets for John Barron.

  • greenmanTN

    NOOOO!!! He might bite me on my bajina!

    https://youtu.be/CO5tFO8lZ2A

    (I apologize. I’m just being a goof. And my bajina itches. 😁)

  • No More GOP.

    I think it’d be really cool for him to hold a rally to do his job.

  • Stephen Elliot Phillips

    Nero fiddles while the senate sacks rome.

  • greenmanTN

    Jesus fucking Christ. This moron is so insecure he has to hold re-election rallies to shore up support for himself!

    You know who else did that? NOBODY!!

    He really is a pissant.

    • Silver Badger

      Yep.

    • Cattleya1

      He hasn’t been in office a month yet and he has had to ditch an aid for what could be considered treason… Tell me how a reelection campaign would work after an impeachment?

      • greenmanTN

        According to Trump supporters we are in a golden age. Golden showers at best.

  • andrew

    It is clear that all Trump knows how to do is hold pep rallies and spout slogans and tweets. He has no idea how to govern. No clue as to how a POTUS should conduct himself. He’s a looser.

  • Cuberly
  • MB

    Can I wear my new ghey-PussyHat (a friend just crocheted it for me last night) ???

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f8f21b4d3536ce61be855c6c2d7ad72482f5d7ddefc9b8acf331773a53da0710.jpg

    • TuuxKabin

      Shocking gorgeous! Put it on and show us, or it d’int happin’.

  • Pip

    Okay, so, I think I’m misunderstanding here. He’s campaigning already for reelection? Am I understanding this right? He’s campaigning for reelection less than a month after he was sworn into office? I cannot recall this happening before, but it could be because I didn’t pay close enough attention.

    1. Am I right?
    2. Is this usual?

    Also, is he just going to campaign all four years to ensure his ego is fed?

    • Proud MOFO Beaner (bkb)

      He’s a narcissist and narcissists need constant “supply” of adoration

    • TampaDink

      Add to your list of unusual new things….some superpac is running t.v. ads promoting Hair Furor’s SCOTUS nominee.

      • Pip

        Really? I am seriously starting to think someone slipped something into my drink around October or so and I haven’t come out of the trip yet.

        • TampaDink

          I feel as if we are collectively on a really bad trip.

      • Bryan

        I heard that on tv behind me, the wannabe Obama-team-member who thinks we can reach across the aisle and just be happy chums? Yeah that’s how you can tell it’s definitely a republican smear ad, in true no true scottsman style, no REAL democratic/Obama staffer would be caught dead supporting Trumpler’s picks.

        • TampaDink

          I felt like they chose a young woman as their spokes person in some far fetched effort to let people try to forget Gorsuch’s stance of reproductive rights.

  • Brooklyn Joe

    Trump Re-election tour? is that like Madonna’s Resurrection tour?

    • TuuxKabin

      Inter Tour hopefully.

  • Proud MOFO Beaner (bkb)

    delete (wrong place dagnamit)

  • SammySeattle

    It’s like that scene at the mall in Soapdish.

  • Mike

    This psycho needs the adulation of a room full of scumbags to make him feel loved and validated. The sad thing is, the crowds will never dry up. There will always be enough to fill the stadiums to yell “sieg heil” to their spiritual leader.

  • Frostbite

    Awww, not as much fun as he had hoped the job would be? Fsck you, no fun for the citizens either big cheeto.

  • darren lyle

    Despite NASA and The Florida Institute of Technology, an institution with an enormously diverse student body being in Melbourne, that entire region of central Florida is a festering pustulent excretory orifice of right-wing extremism and is the southeastern flank of the Confederacy.

  • Sam

    I reserved two tickets as well.

  • Crow on a Top Hat

    Bitch please, I give you a generous six months.

    • TampaDink

      If only a team of well trained doctors would do the same.

  • Clair
  • danolgb

    THIS IS NOT NORMAL

  • Scott Fitler

    I just reserved two tickets to add to the “fuck up the planning.” But I do live in Florida and noticed in the registration “there is no dress code.” I’m not the best seamstress but I think I can handle constructing a burka. Hmm, hot pink or leopard print?

    • William

      That all depends on Prince’s level of ambition.

      Put this comment under BlueberriesForMe. The cold flu medication is making me stupid.

  • Tomcat

    He is allowed to keep funneling campaign donations and charge for the use of any Trump venue. In other words he is in it for the money as usual.

  • Rex

    Re-elect trump? Over my dead body. Probably over every ones dead body. He’s gonna kill us all.

  • missmobtown
  • Bob Conti

    Shouldn’t he be spending his time, oh, I don’t know, doing shit the POTUS is supposed to be doing. It’s clear, he doesn’t want to actually do the job, he just loves the campaign. If he were an employee, I doubt he’s survive the 90-day probationary period.

  • Mickey Bitsko

    I just tweeted Trump that he should hold his rally at the Melbourne Airport in Australia and not come back.

    • TampaDink

      That is just mean……to the people of Australia.

      • Mickey Bitsko

        Good on ya!

  • Elsewhere1010

    MAYBE to boost his ego? The cheering crowds is what he lives for. I believe Trump thinks that being cheered and applauded are part of his job as President.

    • Homo Erectus

      We should turn out our crowd – just to hurt his widdle fee fees.

  • yes b’y

    hey you, you vermillion verruca https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CzOecWoUkAIgofF.jpg

  • Homo Erectus
  • sword

    Putin has ordered all of his deep-cover agents to attend the rally.

  • jm2

    and NOW is the time for the media to take a stand – DO NOT COVER IT LIVE! don’t give him the adulation he wants to create for himself. grow some cajones, people…

    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      They’ll be there. There’s a much greater chance of violence now.

  • Rand503

    I just reserved two tickets. Be sure to use your phone number because they will verify the reservation by sending you a code. They also ask for your zip code and city and state. I did Melbourne, Florida, and the zip code is 32950. You can click that you would like to volunteer as well.

  • StudioTodd

    He is Sally Field in Soapdish:
    https://youtu.be/BXD_46S0hg4?t=17m25s

  • DaveDocSC

    Melbourne Florida (and the Space Coast in general), is a hotbed of unhappy ignorant white people. Perfect place for a narcissist to get an ego boost.

  • Marides48

    Another weekend trip to Florida? So, is this #4 of 52? Well, we all know that Melania won’t allow him to visit tRump Tower in NYC.

    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      Everyone knows that presidenting is hard!

      It’s a Monday through Friday, 9 to 5 job with weekends off. Just carry the football around like a Birkin bag, crash wedding receptions, and discuss classified shit in a ballroom full of uber-rich old white people.

      And the lobster bisque tasted a little “off”. Makes you wonder if there’s been some kind of change in the staff lately.

  • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

    The counter-protest will be much larger.

  • houstonray

    I reserved two as well. I hate being on his “mailing list” but I’ll opt out after the rally. Bwahahaha!

  • Gregory In Seattle

    Crimeny, what a sad, little man he is.

  • Dean

    Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the audience were filled with anti-trumpers who wo9ulod just laugh at every word Cheetolino utters?

    • Cucker “Dick” Tarlson

      It’s gonna happen.

      I’m betting that the crowds will thin, but the inbred racist assholes will still pack up all their cousin-sisters and uncle-daddies in their coal-rolling, lifted 1995 Ford F250s.

      And they’ll scream and yell and wave the confederate flag and litter the parking lot with puddles of vomit, dirty diapers, and empty cases of Keystone Light.

      ‘Murica!

  • Piona O.

    Ah, now the Trumpster is feeling extremely insecure and he needs narcissistic reinforcement from his brownshirts. We can expect little Nuremberg rallies every weekend now, because Trump’s ego is shrivelling up like a dry sponge, and he needs the worship of his minions to stay alive.

    • KarenAtFOH

      Trump is an addict. “Narcissistic supply” is his drug. Addicts ruin peoples’ lives to get their fix, and Trump is no different.

  • Alan S. Lee

    Joe, please go to the rally and take out the picture of Putin holding up baby Trump and protest! Please go there to protest!

  • M Jackson

    I just registered for my first trump rally.
    Who’d-a thunk it? Joe’s monkeys fly again!

  • CharlestonDave

    Since this is officially (by Spicer) described as a “campaign event,” does that mean that the taxpayers are off the hook and the president’s political campaign has to pay for it?

    Nah, didn’t think so.

    • Tomcat

      Since he is on his way to his other whitehouse he is costing US money.
      Also since he continues to use his southern whitehouse we have to foot the bill for the upkeep of it also. The taxpayers are being destroyed daily by the right.

  • cleos_mom

    My theory is that Melanoma took the family calendar with her to NY. He’s amazed at how fast those 4 years went.