Huckabee: Trump May Be A Car Wreck But Hillary Is A Drunk Driver Going The Wrong Way On The Freeway

CNN reports:

A car wreck vs. a drunk, wrong-way driver: That’s Mike Huckabee’s take on the election just days before final votes are cast. The never-shy former Arkansas governor and Donald Trump supporter tweeted Friday a message ultimately in favor of Trump, but with a non-favorable description of him and his opponent.

Huckabee, whose daughter Sarah Huckabee Sanders works as an adviser and surrogate to Trump’s campaign, has been a supporter of the Republican presidential nominee since the real estate mogul all but locked up the Republican presidential nomination this spring.

While the former candidate and current Fox News contributor didn’t jump onboard with Trump right after he ended his own campaign, he has been a critic of Republicans who have hesitated to back Trump. The loquacious Huckabee did not immediately tweet any more explanation of his assessment, nor was it clear what provoked it.

  • sherman

    Another Republicon making Jeebus proud.

  • delk

    How nice! Mikee thinks somebody gives a fuck about what he has to say.

  • Herald

    The worst possible consequence to drunk driving is…wait for it…a car wreck.
    God, Huckabee is terrible at analogies.

    • Jeffrey

      Excuse me, I think you accidentally spilled logic on a Huckabee quote. Don’t worry it’ll just bead up, its protected with ReligionGuard 2000.

    • Gustav2

      Well, all Baptists’ sermons are full of bad analogies.

      • LackofFaithify

        True story, my grandfather was a deacon (laymen, whatever their title is in the Baptist church), and was caught dancing with my grandmother at some club. They kicked him out since dancing is too close to sex. He had already had 3 of his 4 kids when this happened, so unless my grandmother was the new Virgin Mary X3, yeah, they had sex.

        • Jeffrey

          I grew up in a small town in Arkansas that didnt allow dancing until my senior year of school. We were allowed to have proms but they had to be in the next town over. So many baptists there and their religion SO fragile that they literally thought if you danced you went to hell. Ive always been too inquisitive for religion.

          • CatApostrophe

            Isn’t dancing a form of joyful or thankful worship in some instances in the bible? I feel like I remember it from a song I had to sing in church choir.

          • Falconlights

            King David danced ahead of the Ark of the Covenant as it was carried in procession.

          • Todd20036

            And then God melted his face off.
            Wait, that’s something else, right?

          • Acronym Jim

            And Saul’s daugher, Michal, was so jealous of his sick moves, she “despised him with all her heart.”

          • karmanot

            And naked at that!

          • McSwagg

            As portrayed by Richard Gere …
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXeeAOw4yN4

          • Jeffrey

            Depends on the church. We had ten different ones to choose from, but the baptists made the rules. We were the town Jews so it didn’t matter. I outrageously got a tattoo of my Hebrew name and scandalized the whole rest of the town (Jews do not get tats). If only they’d known what I’d been doing to their good Christian boys (and girls) So I never really fit in until I went to college on the east coast and met normal people. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cd2b5688246d9c42ee0804f53919b4ee03fd126fd4437622b46b3343e2ceb55b.jpg

          • Todd20036

            That photo is going to get you LOTS of attention.
            Yeah, Jews don’t get tattoos. I thought of getting one, but I’m too nerdy to pull it off

          • Jeffrey

            It’s a Torah “Old Testament” Leviticus thing. It was never my thing. I don’t buy it I don’t believe it. Jewish in culture only. Religion, Ill leave that to people who find life too complicated to navigate on their own.

          • Acronym Jim

            2 Samuel 6:14:

            “And David danced before the LORD with all his might; and David was girded with a linen ephod.”

          • Raybob

            David dance naked in front of the ark of the covenant. ~Old Testament

            “Praise him with timbrel and dance” ~Psalms.

          • FAEN

            Depends on which religious zealot is interpreting the book of contradictions.

          • karmanot

            Catholics have it so much easier. If ya wanna peek just look down at patent leather Mary Janes.

          • Lulawsisson

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        • Ian

          Caught by whom, one wonders? Tainted fruit Tainted branch! Kick then all out!

          • Hunter M

            That’s the joke. “Who’s the last person a Baptist wants to see at a bar? Another Baptist.”

          • BudClark

            I grew up in a “dry” county, so I used to ride with our Rector to County Line Liquor to pick up the Communion wine, and his gin and sherry .

            Of COURSE we ran into the Pastor of First Baptist …

            Father Sturrup:

            “Good afternoon, Dr. N. … finding everything you need??

            Dr. N.:

            (Gasp! Gulp!)

      • Paul David

        In fairness, if you base your little speechifying on a book written thousands fo years ago by pre-scientific savages…well, you’re asking for trouble.

    • 2patricius2

      Hucksterabee….An example of how rich a man can get selling bigotry wrapped as a package of religion.

    • Uncle Mark

      Didn’t Huckabuck crap out another poor analogy about Hillary being Jaws and Trump being Cap’n Quinn, but didn’t realize that Quinn gets eaten by the shark? Clearly, Huckabee is logically & culturally impaired.

    • Orly

      He’s terrible at everything.

  • Sam_Handwich

    and you are a skidmark

  • bambinoitaliano

    Oh look! Someone took a break from inhaling slob to make a sound. Burppppppp…. and now we return to regular schedule program.

  • olandp

    The angry lady in our neighborhood who refuses to answer the door on Halloween is a conservative Christian who rants that Halloween is from the devil.

    • Chucktech

      Gosh, what a wonderful and fulfilling life filled with kindness and generosity she must live.

      • Orly

        She’s truly “blessed”.

  • Gustav2

    Mike Huckabee’s a hearse with only the family car following in a sad, sparse funeral cortege.

    • Jerry

      He’s Republican, so I think he could fuck up a one-car funeral.

  • Rex

    And Huckabee is a load of manure that fell off the back of a truck on the highway.

    • LookielouE1707

      Trump is an overturned tractor trailer load of Polonium.

      • Falconlights

        BOOM!

  • popebuck1

    No, Hillary is the woman in the old house on the corner that the tough kids won’t go near because they say it’s haunted. They egg and t.p. the house every year because they accuse her of poisoning kids. But if you actually ring the bell, it turns out she gives out full-size Snickers bars!

    • CatApostrophe

      Perfect!

  • NeverEclipsed

    He believes his candidate is a car wreck. I don’t believe mine is. That’s the difference. They assume Hillary supporters aren’t enthusiastic, but we really are.

    • Sk3ptic

      Telling, isn’t it??

    • NMNative

      Happy and proud to vote for Mrs Clinton! I’ll do it again in 2020.

      • Falconlights

        My wife and I as well are very proud to have voted her and we, too, plan on voting for her in 2020.

        A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I attended one of her rallies in Pueblo, CO and I got nothing but positive impressions of her. GOHILLARY!

  • iamanotheru

    at least his is car is pointed in the Right direction? Yes His direction . That is one of his many problems.

  • Rex

    Get back to us after Hillary’s moving van pulls up to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

    • CatApostrophe

      OTish, but y’know what I really hope is some kind of longstanding tradition and not just my goofy imagination? Presidential pranking on the way out of office. Like Obama stealing all the H keys off the white house computer keyboards or like, emptying a can of tuna in a potted plant in the oval office. Oooh! Or releasing three gerbils numbered 1,2, and 4 and waiting all day while everybody looks for the nonexistent 3rd gerbil. Can this be a thing? I feel like we need a good, well-intentioned practical joke at this point.

  • rednekokie

    Isn’t it amazing that all these short-term politicians and political wannabees but never ares are so hateful against Hillary? Could it be …. JEALOUSY?

    Mr. Fuckabee has never strummed my interest chain, and I’m happy that Arkansas finally dumped the bastard.

  • LackofFaithify

    So, cause and effect?

  • Michael R
    • CatApostrophe

      That slogan is poetry.

  • Rex

    Shouldn’t he be helping Kim Davis raise money to pay her legal fines?

    • Hunter M

      Only if he can get his cut of the funds.

    • Chucktech

      Gawd no, she’s old christian news. They’ve wrung as much lucre out of her as they’re ever going to get. Besides, the sheep has already forgotten who the hell she is.

    • Uncle Mark

      He’ll start raising the money AFTER Ms Davis loses her home or is imprisoned for nonpayment. Gotta keep up that “persecuted Christian” narrative. Maybe she’ll get as much as 10% of the cash collected if Huckabuck’s feeling generous.

  • clay

    Dude, leave the parables to Jesus, ‘kay?

    • TSS

      Are you kidding? The election may be over November 8, but tortured metaphors are forever!

  • crewman

    Trump is a big orange trojan horse bearing Mike Pence for president. The religious right is thrilled to have Donald, knowing the chance of impeachment is extremely high. Rape and fraud trials in first year? It’s hard to imagine a Trump presidency not ending within two years.

    • Paul David

      There are too many Republicans in Congress for impeachment.

      • David L. Caster

        Doesn’t mean Trump won’t be charged with a crime at some point. Right now it’s all in civil court, but he may yet make it to criminal court.

        • Chucktech

          So, I wonder, should the horror of a Trump win come to pass, what the mechanism would be if an indictment is handed down in March?

          • David L. Caster

            Here is what I have been able to gather:

            He would have to be impeached first. The probability of that happening with a Republican controlled House is low. The crime(s) in question would almost certainly have to rise to the levels stipulated in the constitution:

            (Article II, Section 4): The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other High crimes and Misdemeanors.

            So, to be arrested, he would have to be impeached and a vote would be taken in the House as to whether to remove him from office. If that vote were successful, then he may be removed from office if the Senate convicts him too. This would cancel any immunity that applied while he was President. He could then be arrested and tried for any crimes committed while he was President.

            Apparently the president has limited immunity against most criminal charges while he is in office, but once impeached and removed, the law would take its normal course.

          • Chucktech

            Great. So first the House has to decide whether to impeach him if (when, actually) he’s charged with a rape that happened earlier or bribes to public officials re. Trump U or tax evasion or any number of other charges that may very well be in the pipeline. Seems a Republican House might not be inclined to do so, so he skates.

          • David L. Caster

            Yeah, he probably would skate. The GOP would circle the wagons and defend their guy unless he was dragging all of them down, then they couldn’t distance themselves fast or far enough. This ship of fools that is the Untied States is going to be in a world of hurt unless the electorate wakes up from its stupor and regains control of its senses.

    • BudClark

      Trump is a fool; Pence is a stone-cold MONSTER.

      • Falconlights

        A HUGE “Blessed Be” to that.

      • Chucktech

        As long as dim bulb doofuses can be monsters, I agree.

  • Stephen Elliot Phillips

    and Fuckabee is a dominionist, child predator enabler

  • David Walker
    • SoCalGal20

      Very sad. I hope that it causes some people to reflect and think.

      • BudClark

        It’s more likely to increase after Nov. 8th if Hillary wins.

  • Sam_Handwich

    o/t NY Time puts the kibosh on the “hidden trump voter” surge.

    Newly registered voters are:
    A. young
    B. people of color

    Mrs. Clinton has a considerable lead over Mr. Trump among newly
    registered voters in Pennsylvania, Florida and North Carolina combined,
    47 percent to 31 percent.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/04/upshot/donald-trump-cant-count-on-those-missing-white-voters.html

    • Bruno

      Yeah at this point it’s actually dyed-in-the-wool Rethuglicans that I’m worried are motivated to vote rather than sleeping giants.

    • Gustav2

      Even on Mourning Joe this morning they were talking about the hidden Clinton vote. working class white women who don’t want to cause problems at home, but in the voting booth…

    • Blake Jordan

      Which is why the FBI is helping to try steal the election for drumpf!!!

  • Bruno

    Third night in a row of less than 6 hours sleep. I fucking hate this country.

  • RJ Bone

    Fuckabee’s car is the one following Romney’s on a certain family road trip. Exactly where he belongs.

  • Paul David

    So it’s clear that Trumpism has taken over the GOP, and that it’s the future.

    The old GOP, which was the same white ethnonationalism that defines Trumpism, but dressed up in convoluted “ideology” and spoken in whispers and dogwhistles, is not coming back. That genie is out of the bottle and ain’t going back in.

    The question is: do people like Huckabee have any place in the New Alt-Right Order (NARO)?

    Methinks not, since there’s no reason to mask your racism and sexism with religion in the NARO.

    • Bruno

      Still, the Teabangelicals will tag along, hoping to score any crumbs they can from the NARO. It’s how they’ve been with the establishment power figures til now, and no signs of changing (see: Cruz, Huckabee, Palin, Santorum).

      • Paul David

        None of the “new guys” are the straight-up religionists of old.

        And the Alt-Right doesn’t really care for the religionists.

        The fundies were only useful when the white ethnonationalism and misogyny were veiled, since since religion was a get-out-of-jail-free card for bigotry.

        Now the jail has been torn down, and a new Trump Tower built in its place. And I don’t think the chicken-fried religion of these hucksters (no pun intended) is welcome anymore, if only because it’s not needed.

        • Bruno

          Well, the Alt-Right needs those religionists to win elections, so if they’re not as dumb as they seem, they may make some concessions.

          • Paul David

            True. But do they really?

            The GOP is mostly Alt-Right these days, and they don’t like compromising, and they don’t like the religionists since the religionists demand to be seen as moral “leaders”.

            The 400 Pound Basement Gorillas of the Alt-Right don’t like preening, moralizing peacocks. And they don’t like to be told what to do.

          • Bruno

            Those moralizing peacocks will kiss the Alt-Rights asses, like they’re already doing. It’s the only way they stand a chance of having abortion illegalized, they think.

          • Paul David

            I guess.

            But the GOP today is more of the “men’s rights/4Chan” bent than it is of the sitting-in-the-pews-on-Sunday bent.

            That’s not changing.

            And the Alt-Right doesn’t give a millifuck about abortion.

          • Bruno

            Agreed. I think one thing this election has proven is that the Teabangelicals really don’t have as much power over the GOP as once thought. The establishment used to be afraid of that group picking up their ball and going home, but they’ve proven that will never happen as long as the party’s platform is anti-choice.

  • Mark

    Huck – the angry old lady in your neighborhood is your mother – and she’s had enough of your bullshit.

  • AdamTh

    Who is this clown? Seems like I vaguely remember seeing him from somewhere…….

    (sarcasm)

    • BudClark

      He’s a fat, stupid Babdist (sic) preacher who occasionally runs for political office; his son tortured a puppy to death.

  • james1200
  • Bill Post

    Oh Mike, typical fundamentalist, afraid of a strong woman.

    • Paul David

      WS, you know that Donald Trump will TOTALLY serve the interests of his followers once elected!

      Look at the coherent roadmap he’s laid out, based on their preferred policies! And his long track recond of trustworthiness.

      • Mike is kissing Trump’s ass so much that not one drop falls out without ass to mouth contact…

        • Paul David

          So?

          Maybe Trump will make him the new Secretary of Religious Indoctrination in his new administration?

          No, that won’t happen, Trump doesn’t have the attention span.

    • LackofFaithify

      Oh, it’s one of those new self-rimming models. Fancy.

  • Michael R
    • Bruno

      SOCIALISTS TURN AGAINST SAINT BERNIE! NEWS AT 11!

  • Friday

    Sounds like Preacher-man’s been drunk-tweeting.

    • MaryOGrady

      Baptists are why liquor stores all over the South have back doors.

  • Blake Jordan
    • Lazycrockett

      Honestly though how uninformed do you have to be to even think this is possible.

      • Todd20036

        About as uninformed as people who vote for Trump

      • Chucktech

        Most likely, you have to be an American citizen. Once that criterion is established, all bets are off.

      • Orly

        Seriously. If you are stupid enough to believe something like this, perhaps you really should not vote.

  • Gerry Fisher

    “Let’s destroy our country in order to ‘win.’ I’m Mike Huckabee, and I approve this message.”

    • Friday

      That’s exactly what they want, these Dominionists. I think they’re under the delusion they can somehow keep all the civilization goodies (Or actually have serfs and land to make farm for them) if they do win, though.

  • Rex

    Don’t worry Mike, if Hillary has a bit too much to drink at her victory party I’m sure she won’t get behind the wheel.

  • David Teager

    My analogy: Hillary is a wheat grass smoothie served in a styrofoam cup. Trump is a poison ivy smoothie served in a radioactive sippy cup.

  • Sam_Handwich
    • Bruno

      Not to be a downer, but the SurveyMonkey state polls are pretty whack.

    • iamanotheru

      yeah , my vote counted 🙂

    • Herald

      Yeah, honestly just ignore SurveyMonkey. It’s nonsense. It also has Hillary up by only one in Wisconsin and Michigan.

      • Bruno

        Although at this rate I could almost believe it. While her polls seem to be tanking in less diverse states like IA & NH, she’s actually holding steady or even improving in more diverse states like FL.

        • Herald

          I just don’t believe for a second it’s competitive in Wisconsin, Michigan, Arizona or Georgia. Those are two blues and two reds, guaranteed.

          • Bruno

            I think it’s competitive in Arizona. Haven’t seen evidence of it in Wisconsin. Georgia is not really in play, though it’s single digits. Michigan I’m not totally sure…a poll the other day showed tightening but I’m not sure I trust it much.

          • SoCalGal20

            I think AZ is competitive. Latino voters are often undercounted in polls. Hillary has been close in a bunch of recent AZ polls. She may not win but I think it’s in play and Dem internal polling indicates it’s in play which is why they started turning their attention there. Also, there’s been a surge of Latino voting.

            http://www.azcentral.com/story/news/politics/elections/2016/11/03/arizona-leads-nation-early-voting-surge-latinos/93129112/

    • SoCalGal20

      AZ has the largest Latino voter surge in early voting so that may make a difference in the election.

      http://www.azcentral.com/story/news/politics/elections/2016/11/03/arizona-leads-nation-early-voting-surge-latinos/93129112/

  • grada3784

    Governor Upchuck:

    We haven’t forgotten those hard drives you had trashed.

  • jayjonson

    Huckabee’s daughter is as much of an a–hole as her father. No wonder the son makes sport out of torturing animals.

  • Ian

    Like Huckleberry doesn’t set his God hounds on people Halloween night or pass out fucking bible verses to the kids.

  • PopChips

    His comment is particularly sad when you consider our last Republican First Lady actually killed somebody in a car wreck.

  • NMNative

    Loser says what?

  • skyweaver

    I hate Huckabee worse than Trump. And that’s saying something

  • CatApostrophe

    Goddamnit, who taught him what analogies are?

    • CB

      418 on the verbal portion of the SAT

  • DaveMiller135

    That is what desperation looks like.

  • Falconlights

    Wow. What “wit” and “wisdom”, Huckabee, and like most of the crap you spew, it is a total lie.

    When I think of Trump, it’s along the lines of Slim Pickens riding the missle to detonation in “Dr. Strangelove”. So, I think ” car wreck” as applied to Donald Trump is huge understatement.

  • SoCalGal20
    • RobynWatts

      Nope….Trump is wrapped around some pussy willows and can’t get out. Not even with Putin Towing….

    • RJ Bone

      I love Keith 🙂

  • RobynWatts

    Wow, Gov. Huckaperv-e, if all of that is true, then I guess that makes you and the rest of those GOP hacks “roadkill”….and you would be so natural at being a dead skunk.

    Run ’em over, Hillary!

  • TuuxKabin
  • Friday

    What cognitive dissonance is the Huckster smoking now with the “Trump Happy Warrior” thing? That’s of course the exact opposite of reality. Even when he’s shouting angrily he can’t hide the undertone of depression that’s been dripping from his voice since the last debate.

  • Paula

    Well, Mike, I wish that you were in that car wreck, too.

  • Blake J Butler

    Worst excuse of a governor ever. Talk about the debunked bill clinton scandals, doesn’t want to talk about trumps sexual assault claims. Also irony given that this is the man who gave special treatment to the duggar family, by ordering the police report of the molestations to be destroyed by a judge.

    And lets not go through his own skeletons in his closet like the pardnoning of a rapist and a known cop murderer who both later went on to repeat the same offenses that landed them in jail in the first place, but somehow worthy of a pardon on Fuckabee on uncertain grounds given he isn’t a attorney, or any career most politicians would have except that he was a pastor before running for governor and that is what he based his decision on.

    Given his tolerance of people under lawsuit for sexual assault, and people who hide child molesters in their own family, one has to really question where his own hands have been ?

  • OdieDenCO

    mikey: since GOP seems to stand for great on projection, one has to ask: how many times have you been drunk and driving the wrong way on the freeway?

  • FAEN

    Fuckabee-just zip it you morally bankrupt slime.

  • Ronald Reagan is Dead!
    • Jon Doh

      Booya

    • IamM

      Love that clip. So well made.

    • Maggie 4NoH8

      Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! Trump’s African American turned on him?????

  • Texndoc

    Either he or his dumpy daughter has been promised $$$ in a Trump Administration. Bank it.

  • Frostbite

    Says the man who hears voices from imaginary friends…

  • TK

    Huck seems to think someone cares what he says. Fuck Huck. A washed-up wanna-be.

    • Beagle

      Exactly — Hickabee thinks he’s still relevant. And I think that’s kind of cute.

      • TK

        Cute as an angry porcupine in your pants! There are still people that actually listen to this moron… and Trump, his surrogates, the alt-right media etc.

  • JaniceInToronto

    “Has-been rants about made-up shit.”
    Film at 11.

  • karmanot

    Ah, does that make Huksterbee, three day old road kill?

  • turtle73

    Hillary is a lady who makes a lane change without signaling first.

    Trump is a monster who seeds a half mile of freeway with land mines.

  • CottonBlimp

    I’ve never understood how bigots can distort reality so thoroughly in their mind. Case in point, this misogynistic shitsack calling Hillary the angry one in an election with this orange hemorrhoid.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/771f4211ee99c45d7cb6d3637af175df25a604559eabc05711c226384c51554d.jpg

  • Gil

    Hillary Clinton is the woman with the daughter who is dedicated to helping her fellow man .Mike Huckabee is the man with the son who tortures animals to death..

  • Grumpy Old Man

    Drumpf is a happy warrior?? Preacher-man, your idea of happy leaves a lot to be desired. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ecadf0b3298f07427ecff161710259f9eaecbd00d4a4dcf0c9924b2b3941e6a6.gif

  • mark99k

    The rise of these pathetic “at least”-based justifications is at once laughable and depressing. If there were more time left in the countdown I’d expect to hear stuff like “well, at least Donald Trump hasn’t fucked a horse!”

  • Dee

    Wait a sec… Isn’t a car wreck worse?? That means Trump is deadmeat. Who wants a stinky deadmeat?!!!

  • Homo Erectus

    Huckabee who?

  • jakeinlove

    Perhaps he should stop tweeting and pray for Jesus to take the wheel…