One Million Moms: Fast And Pray On November 7th That God Forgives America For Our Evil Wickedness

Just in from Monica Cole:

1MM is joining countless churches, organizations, and individuals in calling for a national day of prayer and fasting. It is time that we, as Christians, recognize our need to repent of our own wickedness and cry out to the Lord for forgiveness – and that He might heal our broken land (2 Chronicles 7:14). We know God is the only one who can save us.

1MM has designated Monday, November 7, as a day when I am asking you to join me in seeking God’s face. However you participate – one meal, two meals, all day – please join me and others who will be crying out for mercy.

Sign the petition and commit Monday, November 7, to a day of prayer and fasting for our nation. Encourage your church’s clergy, your fellow church family members, neighbors, friends, and relatives to join in.

  • Brooklyn Joe

    starving for jesus!

  • JellyDonut

    They should make it more than a day, maybe a few months

    • NO MORE GOP!

      Show some real dedication, right? I agree.

    • Uncle Mark

      I’m hoping they’re too weak to go vote the next day

    • clay

      40 days and nights– it would only be Biblical.

  • MikeBx2

    I assume they mean the wickedness of so-called Christians rallying around a man who brags about grabbing women by their genitals without consent.

    • MrSkippy

      No, they mean the wickedness of voting for a competent and extremely capable WOMAN.

      So.. yeah. Dunno what the hell they’re doing really.

      • Harley

        Women who vote for Trump are the same ones who would gladly and with a smile wear a burka to make their man happy.

        • MrSkippy

          Somehow I think you might be wrong. I know a LOT of women that’ll vote Clinton that wouldn’t put a burka on.

          People that vote Trump are absolute fucking assclowns.

          • PeterC

            And “they” are the ones that need to repent for all of their assholeitry.

          • MrSkippy

            They don’t know how to repent. They think it’s something other people do.

    • T-Batwoman

      Well duh, women don’t have rights, they are the property of men. smh….

    • clay

      Please, it’s Monica– use “pu**y”, not the vulgar “genitals”.

  • MrSkippy

    I never understood how or why fasting was supposed to help get your jebus guy on board with your plans or whatever.

    So you’re hungry. How the hell does that matter?

    • bkmn

      You can donate the money you would have spent on food, to the church, of course.

      • MrSkippy

        Yeah, so they can buy their pastor a new Mercedes for Christmas!

        • Anastasia Beaverhousen

          “Oh, lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz”

          • agcons

            Fuck making amends, though. I’m too goddamned old to care.

      • NancyP

        Muslims are supposed to put out a feast for poor neighbors at the end of the fast. No clergy required. Enormous pot-luck.

        • swimboy

          Enormous potluck doesn’t begin to describe it. I was visiting a friend during Ramadan and their Muslim neighbors insisted we come over “for a bite to eat” after sundown. My Italian grandmother would have been mortified at how anemic her Sunday dinner spreads looked in comparison.

        • bkmn

          Good food, bounty and hospitality are the expected norms for that feast.

    • Natty Enquirer

      Fasting brings on mild hallucinations that make it seem like you’re doing something really, really important.

      • MrSkippy

        Apparently so does listening to 1MM.

      • NO MORE GOP!

        So does a good flogging, and the flogging is more fun. 🙂

    • Cousin Bleh

      I have no doubt that fasting, like everything else in the Abrahamic religions, was stolen from pagans.

      • Ray Taylor

        The pagans fasted because of the lack of food.

    • Cuberly

      I seriously doubt many in their flock even know what it means. Or, they think it means they should drive 60mph in a 55mph zone.

  • bkmn
    • Todd20036

      That would take up a 4 hour block 7 days a week

      • Gustav2

        On TNT like it is now?

      • Todd Allis

        For a year!

  • Friday

    Wait a minute, are they actually trying to *repent of things they themselves did wrong for once?* Or did they just get tired of specifying “We want other people to repent of not being right-wing and bigoted enough?” 🙂

    • Jonty Coppersmith

      Second one is the answer. By wickedness she/they mean homosexuals, transsexuals, uppity minorities who don’t want to be killed by policemen, pantsuit-wearing women who think for themselves, foreigners with their “false” religion, etc.

    • clay

      They did wrong by allowing us to be legally equal.

      • Friday

        Well, they keep *trying* to wickedly oppress us?

  • Scott MB

    So, when Heir Drumpf doesn’t win are they going to thank their god for his ultimate wisdom or will they just blame everyone else because their god didn’t give them what they want

    • Falconlights

      Probably the latter.

  • Smokey

    Thoughts and prayers and fasting all you want but remember it’s for your own self-discipline. We are a nation of secular laws.

    • Harley

      Praying. Doing something without actually doing anything.

  • Secure

    They are always crying and in total misery. Take a good, deep look around the world. We have it fucking EASY here.

    • Michael White

      over half the world goes to bed hungry and we have scented garbage bags. The mega churches fill a truck with food at christmas time and pat themselves on the back and tell each other how wonderful they are

      • Gustav2

        Or run a once a week food pantry funded by government, local businesses and non-religious fundraising.

        It really pisses off my next door neighbor when I remind him all his RCC church is providing is temporary storage space for one night. a handful of volunteers and a parking lot.

        • ChrisMorley

          Keep reminding him. The majority of white catholics (men especially) are Trump supporters. Hypocritical deplorables.

      • Ginger Snap

        I bet none of these bitches has ever let a homless person sleep on their sofa on a below zero day give them a meal, shower and clean clothes. I can say I have many times when I see someone in my neighborhood. Some say it’s risky but ya know what I’ve never had anyone rip me off and tgey have been very thankful. So go ahead an pray you usless bitches of million mom’s of which there is 10.

        • Gery Weißschädel

          Good heavens of COURSE not. You cant allow STREET people into your house. Jesus, Mary and some Joe guy…they’ll rob you blind, and then murder you in your bed.

    • Todd20036

      Completely not off topic: as per 538.com, there’s a 78% chance of the Senate turning blue.

      Yes, 78%. It was NEVER that high.

      • The_Wretched

        That’s the outcome that’s too good for me to believe just yet. We might actually get to reclaim SCOTUS rather than have 55% representation for ~17% of the country.

      • I wish the House could also turn blue. The Republican Party have the majority in both houses of Congress and the majority of state legislatures. If anything is wrong with America right now, they have only themselves to blame.

    • Cousin Bleh

      I recently got into with a relative over politics. This person told me we need to vote Trump because only he can fix our terrible economy. This person owns two homes and a private plane.

      • skyweaver

        Obama’s already got a good start on that, no thanks to the GOP. Think how much further we could have gotten with their help. On the other hand they could have credibly boasted about it instead of shrieking about brown people, so party on, thugs

        • The GOP don’t want the poor to have influence, nor do they want them to have healthcare.

    • Curieux Bleu

      Toxic ‘prayer’ and “can’t fix the stupid” fasting … Get a real life and a real job Monica.

      There is no way you are a ‘real’ Christian, because you’re simply an evil little deluded, and delusional fanatic b*e*o*t*c*h .

      No way you follow in the footsteps of Christ … plus you are vain, spoiled, arrogant and damn well selfish, narcissistic and hard hearted, let’s just say cruel. As for Christ and God, they do not know you, not at all.

      Anyhow, enjoy your little self indulgent whining ‘purge’. And hope you enjoy living off the widow’s mite.

      • Librarykid

        and she wrote 2 Corinthians, too!

        • Snarkaholic

          And Third Spazzalonians!

    • The_Wretched

      We work with a lot of folks from India and they cycle through here (US) regularly. I asked a few what they thought of our country and they say things like “is this a resort?”.

    • vorpal

      Imagine living not only under the tyranny of an authoritarian overlord just waiting to smite the human race, but an imaginary one that you are CONVINCED exists.

      These people are pathetic, pitiful loons. I really do feel sorry for them.

    • fuzzybits

      These are some of the same people who don’t want any of those evil Syrians here.

  • Butch

    Yes, please fast and pray. That will be very time consuming and I’m sure much more productive than actually, you know, voting.

  • NancyP

    We pray for an end to racism, homophobia, anti-Muslim rabble-rousing, anti-Mexican-born rabble-rousing, patriarchal delusions of ownership of women and their uteri, greedy ultra-wealthy people who don’t pay their fair share of taxes, domestic violence, child sexual abuse, etc, etc – wait, you say the fast is NOT repenting for these offenses? That the offense is that two people promise to love each other in sickness and in health, etc?

    • Friday

      This sounds actually surprisingly like they want to ‘repent of their *own* wickedness’ for once. Though maybe they just neglected to spell out what they usually mean. 🙂

  • Skokieguy [Larry]

    So are you repenting for ignoring the golden rule and instead judging and imposing your beliefs on others?

    Matthew 7:12 “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

  • Anastasia Beaverhousen
  • Gustav2

    If you ask for forgiveness of your own sins…have at it. Leave the rest of us alone.

    • Friday

      Practice for voting day? I imagine the Catholic Bishops will have a ‘Vote Trump’ stand going in and a confessional coming out. 🙂

  • Mike C

    Always crying to heal our broken land when they broke the land themselves.

  • HeyYouKidsGetOffMyLawn

    I pray on November 7th that God forgives them for their sloth and greed. As well as that hideous outfit they just bought from Coldwater Creek.

  • Natty Enquirer

    I predict a great disturbance in the Force … otherwise known as national sales of Cheez Whiz.

  • Bill

    In other words, they are doing absolutely nothing to make our country better, and will instead gnash their teeth while remaining knosh-free?

  • if you look at any image of any fundie congregation all in one place, you’ll know that dieting is probably a good idea for most of them. of course they’d choose the unhealthiest of methods, and it cloak in religious righteousness. but srsly: most of them could totally do better with a few, or a lot, less pounds. and i’m totally happy if they pray so much, and burn those knees out, that they fail to make it to the polls on election day.

    it’s a shame absolutely no one reads or listens to One Pathetic Mom with a Keyboard. heh, has any major rethug org or pol ever sought their endorsement? with money and media attention? i kinda think the answer is no, and if you’re not a regular churchie at one of their places, you haven’t heard about them, nor care about them, ever.

  • RoFaWh

    I should hope that Monica Cole would pray for forgiveness for her own evil wickedness.

  • Captain Jack

    I think they should all continue fasting till The Rapture happens …

  • If there was a god, I imagine he would have been down here partying with all us heathens. Better luck next time, ladies. All 200 or so of you.

    • McSwagg

      According to the babble, Jesus’ first public ‘miracle’ was the equivalent of making a beer run to keep the party going when the kegs ran dry. And he brought back the expensive beer just to make a point.

  • skyweaver

    God’s going to be at Hillary’s after party that night, wondering how you could have missed the 8.4 metric tons of clues he sent that you should vote for her

    • Amanda B. Rekendwith

      If only he’d sent a talking snake or a burning bush.

      • How could a bush burn with that Talking Snake grabbing it all the time? Then again, maybe that would explain the burning…

      • HanyBaal

        Trump is the talking snake & Billy Bush got his burn notice a couple weeks back.

    • McSwagg

      8.4 metric tons is such a small meteor. I can see why they missed it.

  • Deacon Phreque

    Yes, and then stay your theocratic asses home on 11/8. According to their own beliefs, Xian women shouldn’t be voting anyway.

  • BobSF_94117

    seeking God’s face

    Is that some weird fundie thing I’ve never heard of or did she mean grace?

  • GayOldLady

    No fasting or praying for me Monica…….I’m going to eat my pre-victory Tacos and drink a bunch of beer.

    • Gustav2

      GOL, get with the program. We will abstain from Taco’s for 14 more days…the beer not so much.

  • Mike__in_Houston

    I hate this hypocritical BS more than just about anything the Christianists do. What it boils down to is “teh gheys are taking over the country because of what WE did or didn’t do, and if we were only just less sinful, teh gheys would go back in the closet and leave this country alone.” Honey, if you really believed this, my response would be “you are not that powerful, so shut up and go away.”

    However, they don’t really believe this. They are saying that they are the ones who evil and wicked, but they still mean deep down–correction: right below the surface–that it is everybody else, teh gheys in particular, who are evil and wicked.

    • Friday

      Maybe, …or possibly they’re trying to actually do something innocent just to throw us off this time. 🙂

  • BearEyes

    if you say Booga, Booga enough, will that also bring an eclipse?

    • I much prefer they stare into a mirror and say “Candyman” five times.

  • geoffalnutt

    I think it’s time you combine the two. Pray Fast!!

  • “…and don’t forget to vote November 28th!”

  • What wickedness is that exactly? Letting homeless people freeze to death in a cardboard box in front of your church building? Not caring about sick and hungry people? Or just where other people stick their private parts?

  • Tempus Fuggit

    countless

    That word can mean very many or, as in this case, it can mean none.

  • Rex

    Hopefully they’ll be so busy “crying out for mercy” that they’ll leave the rest of us alone.

  • Tom (Wpg)

    Let’s get more specific: “the evil wickedness” of one million moms.

  • Steve

    I just wonder, will they accept the answer this time? The last 2 presidential elections they refused to take no for an answer. It is time to accept that sometimes the answer is no.

  • bambinoitaliano

    OMM should invest their time on their own children. Raising compassionate loving kids rather than injecting judgmental hate into their psyche. No prayer needed.

  • Salton

    Fast And Pray On November 7th That God Forgives America For Our Evil Wickedness and makes Madame Clinton the new POTUS.

  • The praying won’t do any good, but the fasting will help offset some of the depression binging they will engage in after election day.

  • OdieDenCO

    “…God is the only one who can save us.” donny is going to sue!

  • LeeCMH

    Perhaps 1MM can turn their fasting into a full-blown hunger strike, until the good lord actually makes an appearance.

  • Highmoremotel

    How odd. Not one mention of what to pray for. It couldn’t be about the election, could it? I mean they’re on completely different days.

    My guess is Monica knows what so many of her kind are about to do the very next day. It’s like a preemptive prayer.

    “Oh Lord and savior Jesus Christ, with all my being I praise you for guiding me with your light…100% of the time.”

    “Um” ((clears throat))

    “I’m asking you for forgiveness concerning a transgression that’s coming up. If you don’t mind…terribly…I need to put my faith in you on hold. Now I know this is kind of weird, but hear me out. We, as the faithful, are going to vote for a person who is absolutely the worst so we get a Supreme Court that is righteously the best.”

    “We just want to help you with this one thing. We good?”

    In the name of our father, Lord Jesus Christ…who we always believe in, Amen.”

    “PS. Get rid of Obamacare.”

    “Inyourname…Amen.”

  • Dan

    Thing broken in Christian America

    1. Looking down on people isn’t as cool as it used to be.
    2. Their tax free political organizations…oh wait…nothing wrong here.
    3. Slavery isn’t permitted like the Bible says it should be.
    4. Happy Holidays.
    5. No one has made a Highway to Heaven movie yet.
    6. Grammar
    7. Gay marriages are 10x more fabulous then their breeder Walmart counterparts.
    8. Pat Robertson isn’t getting any younger.
    9. Prosperity gospel ministers have to actually ASK their drones for private jets.
    10. The bitch who lost some emails once is going to beat their chosen 3 times divorced through adultery, orange, vagina grabbing, bankruptcy enabled political leader.

    Jesus save us.

    • Dan

      Sorry. I may have had too much caffeine today.

      • Steve Smith

        Just about right, I’d say.

  • Cackalaquiano

    Great idea! Then y’all will be too weak from hunger to get your starving asses to the polls the next day.
    Edit: “y’all” meaning OMM of course, not us flying monkeys. We just need to make sure we’re sober enough to get there 😉

  • Tulle Christensen

    Dear One Million Moms,

    I think fasting for a whole month would work better than just one day.

    • glass

      I second that. No food or liquids, 24 hours a day, for 30 days.
      That’s how you make America great again.

      • Gates Ortt

        They always say they’re gonna fast, or set themselves on fire, or move to another country if they don’t get their way, but the bitches never do. They just stay here and keep pissing us off.

        • glass

          We need to remind them, daily, that lying is a sin and they will burn in hell for that.

  • James

    If you believe in an omnipotent god, then you must also believe he has a plan for and direct influence on everything that happens, including whether or not someone gets elected to the presidency. Why he’d be interested in what humans–who are intellectual amoebas compared to him–think is beyond me.

    • Jean-Marc in Canada

      I would go one step further and just tell them not to vote…just pray that their god will install their chosen one as president. After all, thoughts and prayers have worked so well in the past.

  • Gerry Fisher

    They really need for people to be seeing themselves as broken and in need of saving from something other than themselves. Essential control mechanism.

  • Wish magic.

    • clay

      Sorta like what Donnie and Kellyanne have been doing with their polling numbers and a map.

  • kirtanloorii

    After I vote for Clinton, I think I’l have pizza.

  • EweTaw

    Arrggggg! Shut this pseudo calvary of jesus eaters up!

    • Robincho

      I was gonna say “cavalry”, but in this case Calvary is much better… 😉

      • EweTaw

        😀

  • Rebecca Gardner

    I think they would improve their odds if they really committed themselves and did a year of fasting.

  • The_Wretched

    Must be a left over from my science days but 1MM= 1 millimeter.

  • MWK45

    If only we could convince them all to fast for, I don’t know, let’s say the next six months or so (that should do it), the World would be a much better place.

  • PLAINTOM

    If Trump is your answer then your God REALLY sucks.

  • Macbill

    A fervent prayer and $3.50 will get you a cup of coffee.

    • Steve Smith

      You pay $3.50 for a coffee? Here its €1. No wonder they’re fasting!

  • PLAINTOM

    50 years ago, they would have been praying against interracial marriage. 60 years ago, they would have been praying against interracial water fountains. I’m not saying they have all stopped.

  • Tor

    I get the feeling they are not going to repent of their own wicked ways, but rather plan to repent of MY wicked ways.

  • Mike

    Nasty women.

  • Frostbite

    But why isn’t Hillary winning your deity’s will? Is it that ineffective to be thwarted by a “nasty” woman? LOL

  • TexasBoy

    The Trumpettes are already cruising the voting place for early voting.

    http://seguingazette.com/news/article_078a0c0c-9a56-11e6-aefd-072db0ba59ea.html

  • shellback

    It sounds a lot like magic and sorcery to me. Now that’s wicked.

  • madknits

    I shall eat all day, recite no prayers, and hope that we turn the Senate and the House blue.

  • Benny S.

    Ummmm — if you sincerely feel the need to repent, why wait until two weeks in the future???

    • coram nobis

      It’s Election Day’s Eve. They might be better-advised to wait till Wednesday the 9th.

      • Benny S.

        Agreed. Church prayer notices / dates such as this always have me question: If the outcome from the prayer is not what the person had hoped for (in this case, Hillary does become President), does this mean that #1 – God did not hear the prayer (maybe he was busy with a pedicure appt at the time); or #2 – God did hear the prayer and simply said “Your request has been denied.” Either way, will the person doing the praying be satisfied with God’s inaction/action? Probably not….

  • coram nobis

    About as anti-American as you can get. I imagine their idea of a godly nation might be Russia.

  • shrumpi

    Fucking lunatics…”I can’t have my way, so I’m going to deny myself food for the day”

  • Ernest Endevor

    Imagine if they had something real to worry about.

  • Liberal Elitist

    And don’t forget to encourage your church’s clergy, your fellow church family members, neighbors, friends, and relatives to vote on November 9th!!!

  • Soetoro Marx

    “We know God is the only one who can save us.”

    That’s Million Mom-ese for “Trump is toast.”

  • 2patricius2

    Monica Cole, I think you should fast and pray on November 7, so that your god will forgive you for your own personal anti-LGBT evil wickedness.

  • LovesIrony

    monica,, I’ve fucked a million dads, just so you know,

  • Cuberly

    “…countless organizations…”

    And we know how good OMM is at counting….heh…

  • Tiger Quinn

    Get your damned hands off the flag – and why is it on a vertical surface?!

  • Ryan Hunter

    Totally crazy fucks.

  • D. J.

    Yes, please ask for forgiveness for all the shitty things you’ve done. It’s a long list. It is the very least you could possibly do…so why bother?

  • Kevin Perez

    ..because Jusus is clueless and won’t know what to do unless we tell Him and He can’t hear what we’re saying unless we are wailing from hunger.

  • Doogie Fresh

    Exciting!! Is this one of those “call to fall on knees” events?! Those are my fave!

    • Reality.Bites

      This is OMM. It’s a “c*ll to f*ll on kn**s” event.

      • Bob Conti

        Th*t’s f*uck*ng h*lari**s.

  • karmanot

    One Million Vinegar Douches have bitter thoughts

  • juanjo54
  • Duane Dimitrov

    Someone needs to sue 1MM for not being composed of one million moms.

  • John Calendo

    The Christian Right has a lot to repent for.

  • Paul Forsyth

    I thought Donald Trump was the only one who could save America?

  • I hate posts like this. My brain becomes so flooded with viciously snarky responses they become a jumble and I can’t nail down a good one. “Delicious Wayne Manor isolate carbon nipple chrome daiquiri” is the best I can manage.

  • CCleverly

    Don’t see any reference to party.. GOP or Dem? Must be Dem judging by the tone of her missive. But I am sorry Monica, I won’t be signing your petition. Your petitions are about as effective as your boycotts. As for the rest of us… GO VOTE.

  • orion dumptee

    ahh,gee, monica, i’d like to see the lords face…Ive ‘cried out’ five times, to have him heal my ‘broken’ swimming pool (leak),and i have’nt seen him YET, if he does show tho, I’d be MORE than happy if he takes you back with him……

  • Y’know, Monica, you don’t have to go through all that. If you’d just learn to mind your own business and stop bilking the gullible, things would get better immediately.

  • EDinMCO

    So, when nothing comes of this “fast” (actual deprivation, sacrifice, and/or personal discomfort optional), can we expect Ms. Monica to openly air her grievances with her inattentive and uncooperative god?

  • Jacob

    And we know your prayers are answered when you all slip in to comas.

  • RainbowPhoenix

    Why yes, conservatives do need to beg forgiveness for putting a fascist and rapist so close to the most powerful office on Earth.

  • UrsusArctos

    They got the date wrong. Aren’t they supposed to stay home, fast, and pray on Nov 8 and vote on the 28th?

  • RJ Bone

    Holding their breath until they get their way? I knew those people were juvenile, but seriously?

  • Chris Lion

    I think they should do it on November 8th. All day. Lock themselves away in prayer–and then we will see God’s will in action. I think they should bring their families and friends, too. All of them locked away in blissful prayer… then they’ll come out on November 9th to a beautiful new world!

  • UrsusArctos

    Since the Y’allQueda folk are for “Self Deportation” would I be out of line asking 1MM to “Self Rapture”?

  • Last record I can find of the actual membership of One Million Moms is under 50,000 (based on Facebook membership) and a Twitter following of just over 2,000 – whatever it is now, it’s hardly “One Million” of anything.

  • Sporkfighter

    “It is time that we, as Christians, recognize our need to repent of our own wickedness and cry out to the Lord for forgiveness….”

    It isn’t the Lord these people need to ask forgiveness from, its the rest of us who have suffered their wickedness.

  • DonnaLee

    “Countless churches, organizations and individuals” so of course we are not giving you a count, because it’s HUGE!

  • Robert Conner

    The Million Moms don’t have a prayer, but I’d bet most of them could use some serious fasting.

  • Snarkaholic

    Look at that pic: Her ring finger is much longer than her index finger = LESBIAN!!!

  • david fairfield

    Update: Start today!

  • EqualityForAll

    McDonald’s stocks will be going down on that day.

  • (((GC)))

    OMM almost got it right. (Stopped clock… twice a day…)

    True Christians should stay at home ALL DAY on November 8, on their knees, engaging in Prayer Warfare to ensure that we don’t get another Democrat [sic] president.

  • heyjjh

    good! more food for the poor and needy!

  • Gates Ortt

    I have a solution. Since Christians, according to statistics, are the most immoral group of people in the world, stop being a Christian.

  • Respectfulguest

    I will fast and pray with my fellow Christians. May God have mercy on us and on our actions and on our country.