Mississippi Gov. Phil Bryant: Christians Will Line Up For Crucifixions In Order To Stop LGBT Rights [VIDEO]

Kyle Mantyla report at Right Wing Watch:

At least week’s Watchmen on the Wall conference, Family Research Council president Tony Perkins presented Mississippi Gov. Phil Bryant with the first ever “Samuel Adams Religious Freedom Award” for having signed a radical anti-LGBT bill into law earlier this year that will allow businesses to deny service to gay people.

While introducing the governor, Perkins said that America’s elected leaders should be “ministers of God,” while Bryant praised the hate group leader as something of a modern-day David.

Later, Bryant recalled how “all of the secular progressive world had decided that they were going to pour their anger” out on him for pledging to sign the legislation, wrongly thinking that he could be pressured into backing down because they were unaware that Christians like him would line up to be crucified before turning their backs on Jesus.

“They don’t know us very well, do they?” he asked. “They don’t know that Christians have been persecuted throughout the ages. They don’t know that if it takes crucifixion, we will stand in line before abandoning our faith and our belief in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. So if we are going to stand, now is the time and this is the place.”

  • JT
    • Christopher

  • Go right ahead. Meanwhile, the rest of us are going to go on living in reality, not Crazy I’m So Persecuted Because The Country Isn’t Just For White Straight Men Anymore Land. Y’all do this and maybe we could actually get some shit *done* for once.

  • watchthewingnuts

    Oh my god where do we buy tickets?!?!

    • bkmn

      Unlike the revolution, the executions will be televised.

      • Brian

        Bummer. I was thinking more of a travelling EDM party.

        • Nic Peterson

          That sounds like fun!

        • Crenando

          It’s like cirque du soleil, but even more queer

          • Robincho

            Cirque du SO Gay…

          • StraightGrandmother

            Ha-Ha-ha, that was Funny!

          • StraightGrandmother


      • Christopher

        After they’re crucified, can we go all “Gallagher” on them? I mean, come on, this is the 21st century. We have to up our game!

        • bkmn

          Gallagher, is that like fattening them up with a sour look on our faces?

          • Christopher

            Nope. Splattering them like a watermelon. πŸ˜€

  • bkmn

    I have nails AND spikes.

  • Jeffrey Hitchin

    Here, let me borrow some of the ropes and stanchions from Disneyland for you.

  • Traxley Launderette

    In other words, the jihad starts now, amirite?

  • m_lp_ql_m

    They don’t know that Christians have been had a persecutedion complex throughout the ages.

    Fixed that for ya!

  • PickyPecker
    • JT

      Nice buns.

      • Robincho

        Yeah… hot buns’ cross! πŸ˜‰

    • Crenando

      Ah yes, the infamous running of the naked Christs.

  • Sk3ptic

    I’d like to volunteer my time to get the wackadoodliest of them at the front of the line, please.

  • watchthewingnuts

    Sadly, when it comes to the actual martyring part of martyrdom, most of these “christians” suddenly disappear and aren’t willing to go through with their promises to off themselves in the name of Jeebus. I for one wish they would… i’m so disappointed every time i learn that they haven’t followed through on their threats to die for their cause.

    • Spudger

      It’s always some variant of “I don’t have to, I made my point!”

    • AtticusOSullivan

      They never have, really. Christian martyrs are as mythical as Jesus.

    • I’m still waiting for Rush Limbaugh to leave for Costa Rica!

  • I want to throw the first stone.

    • StraightGrandmother

      You would, wouldn’t you? LOL!

  • Yalma Cuder-Zicci

    Hyperbole like that is almost always a smokescreen. What is he covering up? His Christian or his heterosexual failings?

  • PickyPecker
    • AtticusP


      • Christopher

        “Don’t forget to sign up for the raffle!”

        • Octoberfurst


          • Christopher

            I took this a few years ago. It was in the window of the bike shop that’s about a half a block away from my bookstore in Hermann, MO.

    • Phil2u

      HA HA HA HA. I live in Burlington…Boringtown, I call it.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    I have finally found a justification to buy a nail gun!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • watchthewingnuts


      • Rebecca Gardner


      • kevway
        • AtticusP

          IKEA be with you.

          And with your spirit.

          • GayOldLady

            Oh, Atticus, your catholic is showing. πŸ™‚

          • AtticusP

            Busted! πŸ˜‰

            I guess you can take the boy out of the church…

          • GayOldLady

            I know, I was raised catholic too and was a catholic until about 30 years ago. So, we’re still recovering catholics and I’ve heard one lifetime isn’t enough recovery time.

          • Bluto

            off topic but Ikea.

          • glass

            Ummm… when did Ikea get into selling vampire hunting tools?

          • StraightGrandmother

            YOU! Are SO FUNNY!

      • watchthewingnuts

        Ok once I thought of it… I had to photoshop it.

        • GayOldLady


    • shellback

      Rebecca, I’d be mighty proud to buy you an expensive dinner, for this great comment, anywhere you want – yes, even a foreign country.

    • Butch

      Make sure it’s for framing. Finishing nails won’t do it.

      • Robincho

        I’m beginning to see how you got your name… πŸ˜‰

      • Rebecca Gardner

        You lost me and ruined my fantasy. *sigh*

        LOL. Like I Know what you’re talking about.

    • Todd20036

      Time to nail some Christians.

      • Phil2u

        I assume you mean literally.

        • clay

          ‘Cuz seriously, folks, I don’t think anybody wants to nail the Gov or his followers (metaphorically speaking).

    • hiker_sf
      • Charles Manuel P.

        Is that from the Spanish Civil War?

        • hiker_sf

          I believe so.

    • fuzzybits

      Too bad Target didn’t sell them. You could buy it on June 4th.

    • peacfulseas inWA

      I’d gladly loan you my Porter-Cable framing nail gun and portable air compressor.

    • LOL x1000

    • KCMC


    • oikos
    • Jacob Bruinsma


  • Cuberly

    I like when they don’t mince words and flat out admit they’re for implementing christianist shariah throughout the country.

  • Mark McGovern

    OMG your country is so crazy I can hardly stand reading these stories anymore….thank god for the entertaining responses.

    There’s not one of those pompous assess who would do anything substantive for their religion. They’ll send in the poor troops, put their feet up in their tax free mansions and watch it unfold on TV, and that’s about it.

    • MarkOH

      Where do live. And how long does it take to apply for citizenship?

  • TK

    Yes PLEASE!

    • Nic Peterson

      Careful governor. The followers of a certain presumptive nominee for a particular political party uses crosses for a very different sort of, ahem, demonstration of faith.

      Otherwise, please carry on. I’ll make drinks.

      • Margaretrtatum2

        “my room mate Mary Is getting paid on the internet $98/hr”…..!gd128ur

        two days ago grey McLaren. P1 I bought after earning 18,512 Dollars..it was my previous month’s payout..just a little over.17k Dollars Last month..3-5 hours job a day…with weekly payouts..it’s realy the simplest. job I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months. ago. and now making over hourly. 87 Dollars…Learn. More right Here !gd128u:➽:➽:.➽.➽.➽.➽ http://GlobalSuperJobsReportsEmploymentsAuthorityGetPay$98Hour…. .β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…::::::!gd128u….,….

      • u8ntbnsrs
    • mattinlasvegas

      me too and I think I got some 2-by-4s in the garage that I don’t need!

    • Chucktech

      Oh, now, now, they don’t need to be crucified. If they would just march into the sea, that’d be just fine, thank you.

      • Robincho

        Remember the Maine, Norman…

      • Todd20036

        Have to disagree with you. The corals are already stressed from global warming

        • Jacob Bruinsma

          Yes indeed. But 2 billion times at least 4 to 8 nails. It’s expensive. We should start a fund.

      • HAAAAAAA

        Orderly as you like πŸ™‚

      • BlueberriesForMe

        I think we should just tie them to the structure(s) with rainbow colored ribbons. Then start up some disco music.

      • glass

        Agreed, I think they should become fast food.



    • douglas

      Great!! I’ll serve refreshments to those in line waiting their turn!!

  • Michael Rush
  • PickyPecker
    • Rebecca Gardner

      Have you always wanted to nail your hot neighbor? Join us for this year’s Crucifixion Summer Fun Fest!

  • lizdhm

    The smart thing would be to develop a backup plan for when they realize no one wants to crucify them.

  • grada3784

    Is this clown for real? I don’t think anyone would even consider wasting the wood on these morans.

  • ceeenbee

    This is the same phil bryant whose son is a gay interior decorator?

    Besides the Samuel Adams Pilsner award for religious freedom, philemina should also be getting the “father of the year” award.

    • StraightGrandmother

      For real? His son is gay and this is the way he talks about his son? Shaking my head, shaking my head.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    I bet we could do at least 6 crucifixions at once if we use gutter nails. Let’s streamline this operation.

    • “Impalement would be quicker.” – Vlad

      • BearEyes

        vertical impalement.
        they’ll never find the entry hole

        • Jay George

          Too tight-assed?

      • m_lp_ql_m

        Don’t they die quicker that way though? Xians like to keep their visible suffering going for as long as possible, you know.

      • justme

        Lets go to Transylvania and Gel Vlad’s fence… Let the impaling begin..

    • Octavio

      If we use a pneumatic nail gun we could staple up 50 an hour, easy.

      • StraightGrandmother

        You guys are terrible, just terrible, you are fighting hyperbole with hyperbole I see.

        • Octavio

          Naw. Just always looking for new ways to use that expensive pneumatic nail gun so’s I get my money’s worth out of it. πŸ™‚

    • delk

      Those crosses do have two sides.

      • StraightGrandmother

        Delk, and you are bad too!
        I know they asked for it with their over the top hyperbole, but did you really have to accomodate them? Ha-ha-ha!

  • Michael Rush
    • shellback

      Having lived through her entire hate-fest, I could watch this all day.

      • MattM

        It really warms my heart to know she’s still alive and had to sit through marriage equality and the decriminalization of sodomy.

        • m_lp_ql_m

          Though it’d be good to again see her get one more pie in the face for old time’s sake.

          • MattM

            She’s not dead and neither are we. No time like he present. But one question remains: banana cream or lemon meringue?

          • Robincho

            Your call. Just make sure it’s some kind of FRUIT…

          • jaybird100

            I think one of her sons came out.

          • Michael Rush

            I’ll notify you if there’s an open casket .

          • douglas

            Hopefully one of Minnie Jackson’s prize winning pies.

      • barracks9

        Reminds me of graffiti from that time:
        “Anita Bryant like Anita hole in the head.”

        And hello, SB – good to see you!

        • shellback

          Howdy! Always a pleasure. Did you finish the ties?

        • Joe in PA

          But, but Anita Cocktail. πŸ™‚

    • m_lp_ql_m

      This is what needs to be done to those Target protesters.

    • MattM

      “At least it was a fruit pie.”

      • charemor

        And it cost 69 cents.

  • MikeBx2

    Mississippians won’t even stand in line for Sunday lunch. If they actually go to church on Sunday, they’ll get up and walk out if the sermon goes a minute over in order to get a table at the Golden Corral.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    I just can’t stop laughing. This is the best RWNJ story of the past four years at least.

  • j.martindale

    no great loss

    • billbear1961


  • The_Wretched

    “We’re going to torture ourselves until you give us what we want.” It’s a perfect shoot-the-bunny ala Southpark.

  • rextrek1

    Let’s get this show on the road….lets see some of this Crucify’n……I claim front row seats! LOL

  • Flailings will continue until morale improves.

  • Dave

    There’s a definitive pungent smell in the air today.

  • Michael Rush

    I can’t watch the video witout thinking of Phil Bryant
    and Tony Perkins jerking each other off .

  • delk

    I’ll ask my physical therapist for some exercises to do the maximum amount of nailing with the least amount of strain on my shoulder.

  • shellback

    Better you than us.

  • Scoot

    Sure, guys.

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I’m sure a lot of Christians are all “Uh … we’ll do what, exactly?”

  • teedofftaxpayer

    Gay rights would have no effects on them other than them selling a product they normally sell. I think it’s time for LGBT to start refusing to do service to those that wear crosses. Maybe illegal but in court just state, they’re using the Bible to refuse service to me, I’m excising my non-religious rights to refuse service to them.

  • Snarkaholic


    • billbear1961

      Save me a seat for the show!

      • peacfulseas inWA

        May I suggest noise cancelling headphones.

        • billbear1961

          How did you know the bear has VERY sensitive ears?


  • The Professor

    Hmmm. Ok. Let’s get some wood.

  • PickyPecker


    • Reality.Bites

      That’s not even slightly accurate.
      People would be standing in front of the victims taking selfies.

      Me and my bro Jesus just hanging around lol #bromance #nohomo #hangingaround

      • GayOldLady

        You’re so right about that it’s scary.

        • Reality.Bites

          My first thought was “but how would the people being crucified manage to take selfies while being crucified” and when I couldn’t think of a way to make that possible I went for the crowd.

      • StraightGrandmother

        The #nohomo was pretty good

      • douglas

        I have seen them do just that in the Philippines on Good Friday where they actually crucify people every year.

    • Gerry Fisher

      Ugh. My heart sank when I saw that. Too true!

    • Robincho

      The difference between a bris and a crucifixion?

      At a crucifixion, you throw away the WHOLE Jew…

  • Pip

    Got all ready to pay the admission fees… Then I remembered that they are all a bunch of chickenshits that wouldn’t give up food in protest, much less actually crucify themselves.

  • billbear1961

    Hateful CHARLATANS–you wouldn’t sacrifice your little fingers for the Christ whose teachings you DESPISE and VIOLATE every time you open your hateful mouths!

    Let’s see you turn away all the self-righteous, divorced and remarried FRAUDS, like Kim Davis, guilty of ADULTERY according to CHRIST, who sit in your congregations, DARING to pass judgment on OTHERS, you two-faced “victims” of imaginary persecution!

    CHOKE on your galling HYPOCRISY!

    An ugly BULLY isn’t being “persecuted” when finally–FINALLY–he’s told to FUCK OFF!!

    Why should you receive ANY respect when you show others exactly NONE?!

  • justme

    Real Christians won’t care ..Now the Amurrikkkan fakes would gladly send for surrogates to take their place…

  • Boss Dave

    Come down off the cross, Phil… we can use the wood.

    • StraightGrandmother

      Oh are you thinking of recycling?

  • MrSkippy

    Damn they just love to be the victims don’t they? They’re being persecuted. They’re being targeted. They’re being denied their rights.

    Does anyone else think one day one of them will put his hand to hid forehead, say “oh me oh my” and swoon what with all the victimness they’re suffering?

    • StraightGrandmother

      Yes the are in dire need of a fainting couch.

  • Spudger

    Go for it, hon. In this case, we don’t need the wood.

  • Jonathan

    I suggest self-rapturing and go away. His son is a homo, Bryant is a creep of a father. What a pandering piece of shit.

  • AtticusP

    I guess it’s true: laughter IS the best medicine.

  • Oh, yeah? Well, if Jesus was all about hating gays, then why did he and “the beloved disciple” pose for this??


  • SURE they will.

  • MBear

    If you’re willing to die than to let a group of people have equal rights and exist peacefully, pretty much not affecting you at all – you’re pretty fucked up in the head.

    • MBear

      and ‘persecution’ to these peeps, I’d snark, would be not being able to get a Super Big Gulp size of Mtn Dew whenever they damn well pleased – goes well with Doritos, or whatever. murrikkka

    • Crenando

      It’s a well known fact that gangs/cults/etc recruit stressed out young people that are lonely or isolated or abused or whatever.

    • David Walker

      “OK, people. The line forms on the far, far right.”

      • MBear

        …one cross each

  • Bill T.

    This is a great idea, but only if they use recycled wood from churches.


    I will definitely help supply the wood for these “crucifixions”

  • PickyPecker
    • barracks9

      “Bitch, I said ‘JUICE BOX’, not “JEW’S BOX”, ya great git!”

    • GayOldLady

      Having children act this out should be child abuse.

    • penpal

      God, that is fucking sick.

    • Crenando

      What did they whip him with, licorice? Being jesus is so tasty!

      • ohbear1957

        He should be wearing a crown of candy corn.

    • That pic is heartbreaking and sickening…

  • Cackalaquiano

    “Christians would line up to be crucified before turning their backs on Jesus.”
    Well that’s extreme. Like, you’ll actually agree to die on a crucifix before you decide two dudes or gals getting hitched really doesn’t impact you?
    I call bullshit.

  • Alan43

    Think of how much hate they have for LGBTs that they’re willing to be executed in order to support discrimination….

    Of course Jesus would do the same…oh wait, there aren’t any mention of gays in the Gospels….

  • kmcdevitt

    “Crucifixion? Good. One cross each, line on the left, out the door.”

  • Jay George
    • Oscarlating Wildely

      Life’s a piece of shit… when you look at it.

      • Jay George

        β™ͺβ™ͺ And so is the governor of Mississippiiiiiii! β™ͺ β™ͺ

  • Elsewhere1010

    So exactly how many Christian’s is he guaranteeing will show up? Can he put it in writing. Can we figure out a way to block members of the crucifixion fetish crowd from joining in? (If you enjoy it, it shouldn’t count.)

  • Paula

    Oh be still my pounding heart!! With I will be happy to help all of them crucify themselves. Please, please. Pick me!

  • GayOldLady

    If I had a hammer, I’d hammer in the morning, I’d hammer in the evening, all over this land!

    • StraightGrandmother

      And you, you gotta help pile on the hyperbole, gonna out hyperbole them Insee, LOL!
      I know once you get something like this going in your head you can’t turn it off, amirite?

  • AtticusP

    Please proceed, Governor…

  • GayOldLady

    Let’s put it up for a vote. All Christians in favor of dying on the cross to keep Gay people from eating in a restaurant or buying a cup cake, raise your hands!

    • Chucktech

      “Question, please? Do we get to rise from the dead a couple days later and float up into heaven, just like good ol’ Jeezy? No??? Fuck that…”

  • DaveMiller135

    Sure it’s not the “Francis Scott Key” Key?

  • kevway

    Here’s a cross for you…

  • edrex

    Jesus Christ! The only thing you have to abandon is your assholiness. You can keep you beliefs. And don’t flatter yourself to think that you’re crucifiction material, you’re not that special to me or to Jesus.

    • agcons

      The presumption is breathtaking, isn’t it?

  • Gregory Peterson

    Some say that Samuel Adams wasn’t above inciting riots and pushing out dubious propaganda to further his goals.

    • pj

      or brewing beer

  • KnownDonorDad

    Perkins said that America’s elected leaders should be β€œministers of God,”

    in direct contradiction to the Constitution.

    • Like that document has really mattered to them in the past? Most of them wouldn’t have read it, which also makes the falacious assumption that they can READ! We’re talking inbred white yokels from Mississippi, remember.

  • GayOldLady

    This man desperately needs some gay people in his life to suggest effective facial moisturizers and hair whitening shampoos.

    • Rocco

      He allegedly has a gay son who was compelled to move out of state. If true, it explains a lot.

    • ceeenbee

      His son is gay interior decorator who was gay bashed and lives out of state. Old phil should get an award for father of the year next.

      • Joseph Miceli

        Really? Why does no one ever confront this shit stain with this?

        • ceeenbee

          I’ve said before, no one should ever say “phil bryant” without immediately following the two words with “the proud father of a gay interior decorator”.

          It should become automatic.

          • GayOldLady

            His poor son must feel devastated by his gay bashing.

  • @killbyte

    God of all gods? Who are these other gods he refers to?

    Organizing a Jonestown-type massacre would be much easier, less messy, & quicker than crucifixion.

  • Kinsey6

    Time to start breeding lions…

  • These are the same so-called Christians who prefer Donald Trump, the serial adulterer, compulsive liar, and man who literally thinks he doesn’t need to submit to God on anything?

    Bryant vastly overestimates the motivation of his people, many of whom are counting down the days when they can get one of those mobility scooters and have the gub’mint pay for it.

  • Puckfair52

    I just finished deadheading some Bourbons & Damasks they would make a lovely garland crown setting for the brutal pricks of Munstead Wood’s bloody thorns

  • AtticusP


  • Get Real

    Congratulation to us who have survived to continue to see these Southern Baptist haters hilariously cracking up because the only things that have held them to together are the lies that they tell themselves that they are nice and hospitable special people destined for “heaven” and their hatred.

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    Line em up! I’ll throw in a pretty spikey hat for free!


  • fuzzybits
  • 2patricius2

    If they do line up for crucifixion (Bryant and a couple of his silly friends), they will have to bring their own crosses and nails and hammers, and will have to crucify each other cause no one else is going to crucify them. Blustery talk is cheap.

    There is a big difference between being executed for refusing to denounce one’s religion – a big difference between being murdered for threatening a repressive state – a big difference between being gassed and burned in ovens for being a Jew – there is a big difference between all those things and being forced to allow people to use bathrooms.

    And there is a big difference between being oppressed, tortured, beaten, killed, denied basic human rights (things LGBT people are very familiar with) and being told they can’t deny those rights and protections to people they despise.

    • Cackalaquiano

      …and it’s so easy to talk big about how you’re willing to die for your beliefs when there’s absolutely no chance you’ll be asked to do so.

      • Cattleya1

        And, you can correct me if I am wrong, but crucifiction isn’t legal even in MS – however deserving Phil Bryant and his heartthrob Tony Perkins might be.

  • William

    “Segregation now, segregation tomorrow, segregation forever!”

  • WIGuy

    If its Mississippi they gonna need some reinforced crosses as obesity is a major concern down there..

    • William

      They already done cut down the old growth forests there. Maybe Walmart can import some sturdy steel crosses from China.

      • D. J.

        Self tapping screws may come in handy…

  • geoffalnutt

    I’m looking for scrap lumber even as we speak! Hell, I’d even start busting up the furniture if I thought it was true! Great new use for that La-Z-Boy!!

    • Natty Enquirer

      I’ve got some particleboard for ya!

  • CanuckDon

    I cry, I pray, mon dieu….


    • Gods, but I miss Army of Lovers! Some of the best dance-trance EVAH!

  • LovesIrony

    your son is gay and yet you support denying gays everything. You are feces.

    • let my personal bitterness with the lifegiver assure you in the way of schadenfreude. those parents in this age group of the gov’s, the ones who kick out their own children for “lifestyle choices?” who continue to contribute to the cause of inequality?

      they don’t sleep so well. they often huddle in fear in the dark, imagining demons coming to punish them for their crimes. beneath the bluster is a fear deeper than any confused 3yo, stronger than in the unrepentant rapist-priest, and it grows with every passing day.

      (i know this via family backchannels) i don’t speak with her, and if his son doesn’t speak to him anymore either, i can tell you it’s a powerful choice of karma/whatever/payback.

  • TheManicMechanic

    I have a pneumatic framing nail gun. Bring ’em on.

  • William

    It won’t be long before they start blowing themselves up, along with innocent bystanders.

    • canoebum

      Ah, no. That’s not their style. They prefer sniper shots from hidden locations, kidnappings ending with a lynching (and a good drink, after), and bombs left to explode in crowded venues, like at the Olympics or a gay club or a women’s clinic. No, these people don’t have any interest in experiencing pain themselves, they much prefer to inflict it on others and then have a good laugh.

  • RainbowPhoenix

    They won’t do any such thing. They’ll just whine about people trying to “crucify” them because they’re being expected to mind their own damn business.

  • Mark NeΓ© Fuzz

    Actions speak louder than words. Which one of them will be the first to put this plan into action?

  • danakincaid

    “β€œThey don’t know that Christians have been persecuted throughout the ages.” Ya, but that was before you became squish Kardashian-watching couch pillows. Crucifixion is just SO uncomfortable.

  • lol. what a drama queen wannabe. keep beatin that horse, idiot.

  • Franciscan

    Could we have Target supply the crosses?

  • rabbit_ears

    Oh please do. I’ll get the wood and rusty spikes from the local rail-yard.

  • Gregory Peterson

    Well…perhaps someone should tell the Bible literalist Governor about Matthew 19:12. If Jesus loved eunuchs because of the reign of the heavens..and the Gov. wants to be accepted by Jesus, then perhaps he should take up Origen’s knife.

    Or, admit that he just wants to deny other adults what he allows for himself.

    Speaking of eunuchs, and weren’t we all?

    Why does God make eunuchs? (Matthew 19:12)
    May 21, 2012 by Morgan Guyton


  • NancyP

    Is that a promise, Mr. Governor?? When may we expect you?

    • John P.

      If only…

  • Rod Steely

    These grifters are obsessed with violence and murder aren’t they? Funny thing- the gays just want to be left alone- it’s the christianists and the straights that are bringing the violence! UGH!

    • it’s be sofa king nice if the mainstream media decided to pay attention to that fact. hateful bashing by angry transfolk on xtians? none. pretty much everywhere that’s true.

      but the people not only talking about, but also committing the majority of the hate crimes? religious whack jobs. this is a significant statistical fact that is never highlighted in the coverage of these crimes. when that actually happens, which is not often.

  • anne marie in philly

    YEAH? you gonna be the first to volunteer, dickstain? I would pay good money to see that. otherwise, siddown and STFU!

    • William

      I’ll bring refreshments. What’s your pleasure?

  • Ninja0980

    How about you step up to the plate then Governor?

  • Mike in Texas

    Sweetie, they’ve been doing that for years. They’re so angry, frustrated, and unfulfilled because most people dismiss them as crackpots and just ignore the cries for attention.

  • Ben in Oakland

    Can I send you the nails?

  • Ben in Oakland

    Usually, the persons persecuting Christians throughout the ages were other Christians. I’d watch your back in church, gov.

  • Bill

    So, christians will martyr themselves because Jesus cares so much where Caitlyn Jenner urinates?

    Do they listen to themselves??

    Are they aware their ‘savior’ and ‘hero’ let 21,000 children around the world die of hunger today???

    • JustSayin’

      He is protecting them fom being raped by the christians

  • wmforr

    They can’t deal with other people having equal rights without squealing and whining. So sure, they’re going to endure torture stoically. They’d be screaming like Dick Cheney if he got water up his nose.

  • Chicago joe

    I will pay $5,000 to the first one that crucifixes himself…. Must be historically accurate, either the traditional way (along with a spear in the side and crown of thorns) or Petrine option…upside down.

  • penpal

    The are only about 2 things that can get a teabagger’s shriveled dick hard:
    1) guns.
    2) persecution complexes.

  • With all the burnt-out and abandoned houses littering Kansas City, I’d be delighted to supply all the wood you need – free of charge.

  • Jeffrey

    Oh, Barbra…there’s just so many of them

  • YourNameHere

    We know about your religious fanfiction you loser. We’re also aware of all the people you slaughtered to get to #1.

    Edit: Thor has a hammer.

  • GanymedeRenard

    Oh, what horrible persecution you people face in the Western world! With all those beheadings and incarcerations! With all those cakes and flowers that people are willing to pay for!

    Bitch, please.

  • Sean


    • Sean

      P.S. David was a homosexual.

      • GayOldLady

        That’s what some biblical scholars have suggested. I think it’s all a work of fiction.

      • Gianni

        It would certainly seem so when one reads that passage in the Bible about David and Jonathan sharing a love greater than that of women. It was certainly much more than an adoring friendship. I think they were doing it with each other.

  • David in Palm Springs

    β€œThey don’t know that Christians have been persecuted throughout the ages.”

    Proof that these hate-mongers have ZERO empathy for anyone else. He knows that persecution is wrong, yet he has no qualms about persecuting LGBT citizens. What an absolutely vile human being. There is nothing “Christian” about him and his ilk.
    I am thrilled, that I know for a fact, that I’ll never set foot in his piece-of-shit state in my entire lifetime.

    • Robincho

      Hubster and I once drove over the Mrs. Ippy line from New Orleans, just so we could check it off on our StateListβ„’. After THE worst fast-food lunch of our entire lives, we got back to the French Quarter and bemoaned those 4 hours that would never be returned to us…

  • JustSayin’

    Let’s try it shall we? We all promise to go straight if every christian lines to be crucified. They have to go through with it first, then we’ll change .

  • TuuxKabin

    Then get in line mother fucker. We’ve got the nails. Crown of thorns and sword thrust into your ribs optional. But just die.

  • How are they being persecuted?

  • I’ll get the 2x4s and some gutter nails. We can help you achieve your dream!

  • Will Parkinson

    My tweet to him:

    @PhilBryantMS I need to know…Bigoted Christians will line up for crucifixions over gay rights. What size nails do you think I should buy?

  • Jeffg166

    He’s flagged. No more mint juleps for him.

  • Henri205

    Some enterprising entrepreneur could put this on PPV with the profits distributed to LGBT worthy causes. It’s a win-win for everyone.

  • Mark

    let’s not waste all that wood and nails.
    Set the lions upon them.

  • If I had a hammer…

  • You first, asshole.

  • adamj2013

    He’s totally correct in saying Christians have been persecuted. Catholics persecuted Protestants. And Protestants persecuted Catholics. And then Catholics persecuted Protestants again. And, well, you get the idea.

  • Mark

    Hmmmm….maybe ken hamm would like a little real life xtian crucifixion going on outside his ark…..tickets! tickets! get your tickets right here!

  • oikos
  • Richard B

    Gov. Phil Bryant would rather support the disgusting odious policies of Tony Perkins than do something meaningful to support his beautiful gay son who has left the state and now lives in Austin Texas.

    • Tigernan Quinn

      Ew. The fashion alone is a hate crime.

  • JohnJay

    Really? Most of those type of Christians won’t drop a dollar in the poor box, spend an hour helping at a soup kitchen, or volunteer at a hospital (three beatitudes Jesus gave them). They are too selfish and can’t be inconvenienced. What makes him think they will sacrifice themselves.

  • “Christians like him would line up to be crucified before turning their backs on Leviticus,”


  • Statistics Pailn

    I’m sure I speak for more than a billion Christians when I say “You first, Governor Bryant!”

  • JIM W

    To repeat an old one…….. “Get down off the cross, Mary, we need the wood”.

  • Ginger Snap

    I’ll believe it when I see it you typical lying Christian.

  • Gerry Fisher

    Gee…you’d almost think they were *pining* to be crucified. (Or for the fjords.)

  • zhera

    Yeah, you’re so persecuted, Bryant. In your job still, with supporters, all the rights and privileges that are afforeded a white christian man in Mississippi. How’s the view from that cross?

  • RealityBass

    I’ll bring the nails.

  • TrollopeReader

    Hmm … He’s a Methodist, so I guess he can drink beer … but he’s no Sam Adams, that’s for sure.

  • EmmaDarian

    “They don’t know that if it takes crucifixion, we will stand in line before abandoning our faith and our belief in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. ”

    No one cares about your personal faith, except when you try to insert it into the government.

    How many crucified Christians does it take to stop equality? It’s a trick question. You can’t.

  • Tigernan Quinn

    If you guys want to crucify yourselves, either literally or metaphorically, don’t expect me to give a single shit while you do it. We’re not a theocracy – what our fringe elements do with their time isn’t of interest to the center.

  • “Christians Will Line Up For Crucifixions”

    Insha’Allah !!

  • Robincho

    Bryant was given the Samuel Adams Award because the Colt Malt Liquor Award had already been present to Piyush…

  • William

    OT – This incoherent drivel was over on Yahoo. The author can’t quite figure out what her point is.

    The LGBT Movement Will Self-Destruct


    • David Walker

      There are times that Yahoo proves they chose the correct name.

    • Floyd

      That’s a lot of batshit crazy.

  • Gerald Parks

    Jeeze ..will this be televised?

    It will get great ratings?

    Let’s do it!

    • David Walker

      Be sure it’s at least 6 weeks on TLC right after the Duggar hour.

      • Gerald Parks

        Ok …whatever it takes!

        Let’s do this!

        Will the Gov lead by example??

        How about the entire Family Research Team!

        This is gonna be an awesome reality show!

        The best ever!

        • David Walker

          It’ll make TLC great again.

          • Gerald Parks

            Alrighty then …let’s do it!

        • David Walker

          And don’t forget the series DVD collection.

    • Dan Robinson

      I think it’s on right after the gladiator fights.


      • Dan Robinson

        Looking for that I found this which is pretty funny…

      • Gerald Parks

        Now THAT’S good TV!

        Can we send the GOP/republicans into space too?

        After all …their front runner does have a tribble on top of his head!

  • Octoberfurst

    So Christians will be willing to be crucified rather than give gays equal rights. Yeah—right. I’ll believe it when I see it. They love to talk tough but we all know it is bullshit.

  • Robert Conner

    Phil Bryant has nothing to lose because–let’s face it–Mississippi has nothing left to lose. The largest employers in Mississippi, aside from hospital chains, are auto assembly plants and they’re in Mississippi because of the cheap labor. Mississippi has the highest poverty rate (22%) and lowest national income. Mississippians may not be crucified, but they are well and truly fucked.

    • GleeBunny

      Only things keeping me here is I have tenure and the state employee retirement system. Either one of those goes and I’m OUT.

  • …..

  • …….

  • “Get down off the cross, use the lumber to build a bridge…and GET OVER IT.” – Christopher Titus

  • madknits

    I’ll bring the hammer and nails, motherfucker.

  • Hank

    Bryant, the FRC and ALL others, need to be reminded:

  • HomerTh

    Well now we know the Governor of Mississippi’s favorite masturbation fantasy is.

  • charemor

    You want crucifixion? That can be arranged.

  • Balderdashing

    Oookay, well, that’s one way to bring Mississippi into the 21st century. I’d look for a less drastic method, but to each his own.

    • EdA

      I’d settle for Mississippi entering the 20th century.

      • Floyd

        I’d settle for it entering the 16th

  • Patricia Stidham-Burns

    WOW! Just freaken WOW!!!

  • SammySeattle

    Isn’t that cute, he thinks he’s being persecuted. So much crucifixion envy.

  • Baltimatt

    That Samuel Adams?

  • Lindoro Almaviva

    He is right. I mean look at how many senators and representatives enlisted their kids right after war was declare in Iraq. They could not wait to send their kids to wage holy war against those godless Muslims, right? I am sure the same thing happen again. Throngs of Christians will watch as other people sacrifice themselves for their sake, if those happen to be non white and foreigners, even better.

    Some people are so self important they have no sense of how stupid they really are.

  • TexasBoy

    Religious Zealots…Self Martyring for over 2000 years.

  • sword

    What will the last Xtian do…when she is the last one with a hammer…ask for a volunteer from the LGBT?

    • Gianni

      The last one would willingly say they didn’t want any part of that, but were forced to be faithful to the Lawd; throw down the hammer; and walk home to have a nice meal.

      • BudClark

        “Substitutiary atonement” (suffering for the sins of another) has reached a sort of nadir in orthodox Christian theology at the present time. Bishop John’s lecture about the Black Death is MOST illuminating in that regard, as are some questionable verses in the Exsultet, the solemn chant announcing East.


  • Gianni

    Poor fucktard Bryant you took the governor’s job and can’t handle the blowback. What a speech – totally ludicrous, but so noble sounding! These Christian crybabies are so transparent with their whining about persecution. Seems it’s preferential treatment for Christians or they’ll willingly climb on the crosses and be crucified. Now, gov, you feel so smug talking such trash ’cause you know it ain’t gonna happen, no way. BUT, if the gov can get the ball rolling, would someone please send me the address of where they will assemble the crosses? I want to send a donation to help them build as many as these wonderful whiners want.

  • Silver Badger

    Well then, let’s start crucifying them. I imagine after a few dozen crucifixions, they will change whatever serves them for a mind.

  • sandollar_man

    Oh he’s so persecuted.
    When you go to your church and the main theme is a guy on a cross being persecuted, you tend to follow that theme in your life.
    And this persecution type of propaganda is reinforced 52 times a year.
    The protestant varieties of Christians go into their churches to gaze at a crucifix – a torture device. They get all warm inside.
    The Catholic varieties of Christians go into their churches to gaze at a half naked man in a submissive torture position on – a torture device. They get all warm inside.
    Then they engage in symbolic cannibalism.

    • BudClark

      To give the Roman Catholics, SOME credit, newer RC churches have Christ reigning in glory from the Cross. I don’t particularly care for the one at the national Shrine in D.C., but it does get the point of “Pantokrater / Creator of the Worlds” across.

      • “Christ reigning in glory from the Cross” Ewww. Give the bloody guy a break!

  • God made Trannys in his own fabulous image!

  • DavidAZ

    So line up, bitches! I’ve got nails and hammer ready to go. And I’m retired so I can crucify all day long and not break a sweat.

  • Ogre Magi

    If only

  • Spudman


    • Rebecca Gardner

      Welcome to the Dollhouse.

      Love that movie!

  • Ian

    One wonders if push came to calvary would the guvnah be *first* in line? I really don’t think so. Bravery comes easy when there are no consequences.

  • Mike in NC

    Somebody should just drop all those whiny christers off to fend for themselves in Pakistan or Iraq, or any number of other Muslim countries where Christians are REALLY persecuted, so that they can tell the difference!

  • mike953

    This is like the KKK claiming they are persecuted for lynching Black Americans.

  • ECarpenter

    This guy whimpers and wails when he gets a paper cut. Or when a federal court says he’s breaking federal law and violating the constitution. What an immoral goon!

  • The Milkman


  • Angela Monger

    Seems to me that these assholes already abandoned their faith in their Jaysus because their Jaysus never said that it’s okay to discriminate against people. He said to love your neighbor. He never said love your neighbor unless he’s gay.

  • Johnny Wyeknot

    Hemp rope instead of nails this time just to make sure.

  • EdA

    Well, Governor Bryant and many of his fellow Christianists probably already have the sheets to wear for their Crucifixions. But if they really want to be crucified, wouldn’t be mean to deprive them of their fetish? Or would that deprivation also feed into an S-M scenario?

  • Kissmagrits

    We’ll go to Home Depot for spikes and a heavy mallet. Proper thorns might be a problem, though, so I wonder if rose and holly bushes would do. Scourges should be no problem because we have a well stocked leather store nearby. Have I missed anything?

  • Margaretrtatum2

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    two days ago grey McLaren. P1 I bought after earning 18,512 Dollars..it was my previous month’s payout..just a little over.17k Dollars Last month..3-5 hours job a day…with weekly payouts..it’s realy the simplest. job I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months. ago. and now making over hourly. 87 Dollars…Learn. More right Here !gd128u:➽:➽:.➽.➽.➽.➽ http://GlobalSuperJobsReportsEmploymentsAuthorityGetPay$98Hour…. .β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…::::::!gd128u….,…..

  • Dale

    Crucify yourself, you piece of christian shit.

    Go fore it.

    • BudClark

      “Self-Martyrfication” was one of the earliest heresies condemned by the Church.”

  • Canadian Observer

    Well if they are standing in line, it would be plain rude of me to not offer to cover the cost of the nails…

  • IDavid

    I hope to God they’re fully clothed because loin clothes on those dudes ……uck…. But I do applaud them for HanGing in there.

    • BudClark


  • Blake Jordan

    Can apply for the job to nail those fckers to the crosses???

  • BudClark

    He MIGHT have been pretty ,,, about thirty years ago!

  • cleos_mom

    Centuries of religious art and music have considerably sanitized crucifixion; it’s a horrible way to die. For every believer who’d be willing to be martyred in that way, there are a few hundred who would simply skip town. The people you occasionally hear about who “crucify” themselves are doing improvisational theatre.

  • Uncle Mark

    Such a drama queen. He gets this way when he runs out of toilet paper too.

  • Cackalaquiano


  • vicweast

    A disturbing, yet amusing thread.

  • Stev84

    The sooner they die the better

  • Marti386

    Well Phil, if a bunch of you want to line up and crucify yourselves, it’s not like any of us are going to stop you.

  • Old Top Kick

    You first, #GovDoucheBag.

    Waiting for the rent boy scandal to break.

  • Debbe Hardymon May

    How do people like him happen??? Does he not know that the same language he and others like him are using to day is the same language that was used before the repeal of slavery on the subject of slavery? Does he not know that as people become educated on the fact that as people have become educated on human sexuality, science and the like that their views have evolved from what he is isolating out of the Bible? Does he not know that the Bible doesn’t record one instance of Jesus dealing with gay people in the manner he believe in? Does he not know that his belief on homosexuality is rooted in the Biblical narrative that describes the attitudes of Bible days when the only understanding they had of homosexuality was what they saw in the pagan temples and in the orgies the pagan people of the day participated in? Well, no, he doesn’t know and doesn’t want to. He would probably be glad to reestablish slavery, too. Nincompoops really, really, really make me tired, especially when they are bat poop crazy along with it.

  • CoolBeans

    I’ll donate the wood for the crucifixes.

  • SilasMarner

    Phil Bryant, take your place at the head of the line.

  • Willow C. Arune

    Oh brother. What nonsense. Says a lot for the voters in this starte that elected him…

  • Mike Rochefort

    Jesus was crucified. The Jews were the chosen people, not the Christians. Christians took the OLD TESTAMENT and rewrote it to justify their hatred and judgment of man by exacting passages and twisting it to their own interpretation. You had a choice, Church of England or Christianity, which was viewed as a cult, forcing your beliefs upon others, which violates the Constitutions Freedom of Religion. The “bible” is a plagerized book stolen from GOD’S chosen people. Written by self proclaimed profits. We all know about those “profit”, Jim Jones, David Karech, Heaven’s Gate. Maybe it is time to Crucify the “cristians”.

  • earl1940

    Wow… homophobes are out in force today… as if the fact that someone is gay or transgender affects their lives… sad…

  • crazymonkeylady

    One cross, no waiting!

  • wds

    ” β€œThey don’t know us very well, do they?” he asked.” Oh yes, I do – I grew up with you money-grubbing, attention whores trying to get anyone and everyone to agree with you. And the ONLY ones you get to agree are those who have NO idea what the Bible actually says and/or comments on. I’ve spent years trying not to be judgmental, but damn, after these last few years, I don’t give a rat’s ass anymore if I am.

  • Dave Lanson

    Can I be the ticket-taker and be in charge of the line? We don’t want any sane people to be crucified.

  • Ken Alterwitz

    I’m happy to bring the hammer and nails.

  • David Landers

    hey man, some folks like BDSM. don’t judge.

  • tomjlowe

    Not anger, governor – embarrassment for our wonderful but misguided state.

  • “…if it takes crucifixion, we will stand in line before abandoning our faith and our belief in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”

    No one is asking you to abandon your faith/belief, but go ahead and line up… since you insist, let’s make this persecution fantasy of yours a reality.

  • Martin Austin

    I’m going to start making Crosses now, can’t wait. The sad thing is that people of religion have no right to remove the rights of those who choose not to have it, sadly due to this the world will be cursed to eternal war, hate, murder and cruelty, all due to this sort of behaviour.

  • continuallyamazed63

    Oh yes! The poor persecuted Christians. Boo Hoo! That is BS!!

  • Tim V Johnson

    I have just a couple of questions about your exciting and excellent program: Are you taking referrals? –There are a few people whom I would like to send your way. Do they need to sign up in advance? Is any special advance registration required? Will they need any special waivers, you know, like for band camp? Will there be a fee ( If there is, I am sure that they would be happy to pay their own way)? Do I get a special discount if I make them a cross out of recycled lumber? Will the burial of the crucified be covered by their life insurance or their health insurance, or will that have to come out of their own pocket? How can we be sure that they will not come back again after three days? Do potential candidates for crucifixion need to travel to Mississippi to be crucified, or will you establish multiple sites in every state–you know, like crucifixion camps? Wow, there are so many questions. Phil, I’m not sure if you have thought this through very well… Is there a number to call for more information–like they have for the Butterball Turkey Hotline?

  • Stephen Herbertson

    Time to head to the lumber yard and hardware store!