Austin Ruse: Send Me Money To Stop Satan

Two weeks ago hate group leader Austin Ruse asked for money to stop yours truly. In today’s money beg he asks for money to stop Satan. Same thing, really. He writes:

The good outweighs the bad. But, the bad guys are coming. Abortion lovers. Radical homosexuals. Sexual revolutionaries. They are coming for our children. They want to win our children over for their nefarious causes that come from the very pits of hell.

C-Fam is the watcher on the wall. We have stood atop this wall since the summer of 1997, sometimes all alone. That is 18 years of stopping a right to abortion, 18 years of stopping a redefinition of the family, 18 years of protecting a right to religious belief and practice.

The new year will be just like each of the last 18, a pitched battle against powers and principalities who want to enslave mankind and send souls to hell. I do not say our worldly opponents are devils. They are merely but still dangerously slaves to their own sins and therefore confused. Our real opponents are the devil and his minions who prowl about the world seeking the ruin on souls.

The Devil is well funded. God’s children, not so much. In the waning days of this year, we need to raise substantial funds in order to close our budget deficit and to begin the new year strong.

Can you say a prayer right now so we may remain on that wall bravely fighting His fight. As you pray, ask Our Lord how much you should send to us right now to continue this fight. You can give a fully tax-deductible contribution by going to www.c-fam.org/donate. Please give as much as you can. Be Brave.

Stand by for Ruse to join the comments thread. He finds any mention of his name irresistible.

PREVIOUSLY ON JMG: Austin Ruse says JMG readers are controlled by Satan. Austin Ruse gets fired by the American Family Association last year after a guest-hosting spot on their radio network during which he declared that liberal university officials “should all be taken out and shot.” Austin Ruse claims that a Vatican priest once offered him absolution if he were to murder Hillary Clinton. Ruse is the head of C-FAM, the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute, which is a member of the World Congress of Families, the coalition working with NOM and others to export anti-gay hatred to foreign counties. During a speech at CPAC 2012, Ruse denounced the United Nations for issuing a resolution against the gay death penalty. Ruse is married to FRC “senior fellow” Cathy Ruse.

  • Phaius

    18 years and you’re still a failure at everything you’ve been fighting, Austin! So either your god is powerless, doesn’t care or… in reality, it doesn’t exist.

  • Sam_Handwich

    it’s missing something….maybe a few long-haired, earring-pierced men scurrying around running forklifts, inserters and huge printing presses.

    • barrixines

      Indeed -I find it much harder to masturbate to one of Austin’s money begs than one of Eugene’s.

    • KCMC

      inserters? I think I just ordered a jelly kind.

    • Jamie_Johnson

      Don’t forget the heaving chests under open-collared flannel! Oh wait…

    • Bad Tom

      Wait. Tell me more of these inserters.

  • Michael Rush

    If only they had used their powers for good instead of money grabbing .

  • anne marie in philly

    EAT ME, DOUCHEBAG! oh yeah, and have a shitty new year too!

  • Doug105
    • Good Shot Green

      In the second pic, I love how meatballs look like gigantic ovaries.

  • Pollos Hermanos

    We’re waiting for you Austin.

    http://i.imgur.com/wzQcySU.gif

    • Marc

      Now there’s a handsome little devil

  • Rebecca Gardner

    WOW! These hate groups are really begging hard as of late. Could it be that nobody is buying their brand of hate anymore? Let’s hope.

    Sadly, they will never go away. They will repackage themselves and find the next target to grift off of. Can’t attack women’s suffrage and rights anymore, can’t attack the inter-racial love anymore, can’t attack the homosexual love anymore. So what’s next? I am thinking it will be trans rights.

    NOM will be repackaged as NOG the National Organization of Gender.
    C-FAM will be repackaged as C-GEN the Center for Gender Rights
    “Porno Pete” will repackage his hate group as the Truth About Gender Identity

    and so on…

    • Rebecca Gardner

      And……………………………….
      A moment after I wrote the above, I found this…
      Indiana Lawmaker Introduces ‘Pay To Pee’ Bill For Transgender People
      http://thinkprogress.org/lgbt/2015/12/30/3735386/indiana-criminalize-transgender-bathroom/

      • sw42

        In response a bill was proposed called “Pay to Legislate” – the fine is $5,000 for any Indiana law proposed that is douchey.

        • Phillip in L.A.

          For a minute there, I saw your second sentence as, “for any Indiana law that is proposed in that duchy

          Your formulation is way, way better!

    • Azima Khan

      I’m guessing that now that same-sex marriage laws are settled the hate groups’ dark money big donors have pulled out. You’ll notice before the Paris attacks the GOP candidates had an outrage-of-the-week thing going, because marriage equality was no longer sufficiently distracting their stupid base from the economic disparity those same big donors are responsible for.

    • delk

      All their usual suckers spent all their cash on all the various Go-Fund-Me grifts.

      • Phillip in L.A.

        So, are the bibliolators ahead of the grifting curve vis-a-vis crowd funding (i.e., has grifting of all shapes, sizes, and odors generally infested crowd-funding, or have the religious zealots actually gotten out of the blocks really quickly this time)?

        Serious question.

    • Phillip in L.A.

      together, they will be NOGGEN!
      (as in, I bumped my…)

    • kaydenpat

      Unfortunately, they’ll always find targets to hate. It’s just what they do.

  • IamM

    Abortion, still legal. Legal marriage, now equally available to same-sex couples. Keep failing at your evil goals C-FAM.

  • Ray Page

    Ruse is just one more professional parasite selling fear and hatred. NEXT!

  • Dagoril

    Well I for one don’t love abortion. But people like Ruse have made me really, really, like it.

  • Marc

    O/T: NOM is now at $122k of the $200k year-end money beg. Around this time yesterday they were at $116k.

    • TuuxKabin

      He has what, two more days? I bet he makes it, not hope he makes it, I think he’s just been shrilling.

      • Marc

        In theory until midnight tomorrow, but there’s no doubt in my mind they’ll make it. Some generous benebigot will step in at the 11th hour and save the sinking ship.

        • John30013

          Either that or the “generous” donor will just give ’em the $200K anyway (which was probably the plan all along).

          • TuuxKabin

            You anywhere near Conyers? Askin’ for a friend.

          • John30013

            I live in Conyers (Newton County). Who’s your friend?

          • TuuxKabin

            Just foolin’, I’m always curious when I see somebody with a zip code in their avatar, an ol’ post office game I used to play. And I like to have an idea where a lot of us are from. I’m in 10025, Upper West Side, Manhattan, near Columbia U. Thanks for replying.

          • John30013

            I figured as much 🙂 There’s a DJ on one of the Atlanta FM radio stations who claims to have memorized every zip code in the US. When he was first hired, he did a little segment every night where he’d take callers who would name their city and he would name their zip code. That was just a few years ago, so even then he could have just been Googling it.

          • Ed Burrow

            I was in 10027 for vacation earlier this month. Live in 70006 though.

        • NedFlaherty

          Don’t forget the Vatican and its many secret and not-so-secret subsidiaries such as the profiteering non-profit Knights of Columbus insurance company.

          And don’t forget that all such funds can be easily laundered through a string of individuals and organizations to hide the originator.

  • Richard Rush

    I’m sure it’s been noted before, but Ruse is the perfect name for that scammer.

    “Please give as much as you can. Be Brave Brainless.”

    • Phillip in L.A.

      Yeah, surprised more people didn’t pick up on this.

      “My name is Ruse, send me $$$”

  • Sporkfighter

    “The Devil is well funded. God’s children, not so much. In the waning days of this year, we need to raise substantial funds in order to close our budget deficit and to begin the new year strong.”

    Satan hasn’t a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million.
    Mark Twain

    • Paige Turner

      Im all about the Mark Twain quotes at the moment.

      Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

      Mark Twain

      • KCMC

        this Mark Otter Twain?

        • Good Shot Green

          Mm. Hairy men are the hottest men.

        • ben-andy

          mrowr!

  • olandp

    Does this mean that you aren’t Satan, Joe? You must be so disappointed, I know I am, here I thought I was a follower of the devil himself.

  • Cuberly

    “They want to win our children over for their nefarious causes that come from the very pits of hell.”

    “I do not say our worldly opponents are devils.”

    Um.

  • nocadrummer

    I’m reminded of something I heard decades ago. I think it was a Catholic bishop’s quote. “If we get them by five, we’ve got them for life.”
    Granted, some escape, but he was pretty much dead-on.

    • Azima Khan

      I think I heard it as “give me the boy until he is seven and I’ll give you the man.”

      • David Gervais

        That’s a Jesuit motto, attributed to Francis Xavier, a founder of the Jesuit Order. The implication is that the best time to indoctrinate a person into a lifetime of belief and obedience to religion is when they are very young.
        Religious leaders are well aware of the vulnerability of the child brain, and the importance of getting the indoctrination in early. A child’s brain is very maliabe until puberty; after that the basic structure is fixed.

      • 2guysnamedjoe

        ‘Cause an eight-year-old will laugh at you if you try springing that nonsense on him.

  • PLAINTOM

    Maybe it’s just me but I see all these buildings with crosses on top so why doesn’t God just divest his real estate investment if he’s so pressed for cash.

  • Octavio

    Oh, Joe . . . you radical homosexual you. (flutter, flutter, flutter). XOXOXOXO

    • Phillip in L.A.

      If I had known 30 years ago it would be so easy to become a radical homosexual in 2016, I would taken those Quããludes® Mr. Cosby offered me

      • Octavio

        They handed out Qualudes in Vietnam as if they were breath mints. Anyone who complained they couldn’t sleep was given a ribbon of blister-packed pills about the same size of a Certs. They worked. Sometimes too well. 🙁

  • delk

    As you pray, ask Our Lord how much you should send to us right now to continue this fight.

    He said zero.

    Oh and he also said go fuck yourself.

    • Blake Jordan

      Not even he is desperate enough to have sex with himself!!!

  • bkmn

    Talking about corrupting the chillun – so in terms of right wingers that pretty much means Ruse comes from a long line of kiddie diddlers since they love to blame everyone else for what they do.

  • Ben in Oakland

    Do people really take this stuff seriously enough to give him money?

    18 years of stopping abortions, which are still happening.

    18 years of stopping family redefinition, except for the part about divorces and remarriage, and illegiti,act.

    18 years of defending religious freedom, which the first amendment has been doing for 232 years already.

    They give this guy money for doing nothing at all!!!!!!!

    • David L. Caster

      Apparently it’s a good job if you can get it. Almost certainly somewhere there’s a granny eating dog food so this guy can stay in business. This fraud should be homeless and selling pencils out of a cup if even one person he has frightened was convinced to sacrifice a meal or medicine to send him any amount of money.

      • Phillip in L.A.

        you, sir or madam, are a princess among honey badgers!

        • David L. Caster

          I’m a guy. Thanks.

          • Phillip in L.A.

            I know, David. Just trying to do my part to combat linguisto-patriarchal sexism, & c.

    • Librarykid

      Holy flying fetuses, Batman, abortions are still happening!

  • TuuxKabin

    Joe, is he the one who addresses you as Gina, or Pamela?

  • Mister Don

    Hey Jowl-Puss, you’re losing your children left and right anyway.

    • Guess?

      He’s desperately trying to save the children for the Duggars and the Priests!

  • teeveedub

    “… watcher on the wall …”?

    What the fuck is that supposed to be? Anything like “elf on a shelf”? If so, that’s bullshit, too.

    • KCMC

      Isaiah 62: 6 [On your walls, O Jerusalem, I have set
      watchmen; all the day and all the night they shall never be silent. You
      who put the Lord in remembrance, take no rest, …]

      • sherman

        Ooh, aren’t you the fancy one with your Bible verse quoting, looking down on the rest of us heathens.

        • KCMC

          shucks no, sir. All of us in the gutter, some of us looking at stars.

      • Friday

        You’d think Ruse and his suckers would see a difference between being a posted sentry and screaming nasty and false things about other people who aren’t actually attacking, or… Paying someone else to do that, for that matter.

        It’s not ‘watching’ if you make stuff up about others and then stick your nose in a book trying to ‘prove’ it’s holy to do so. 🙂

    • Dreaming Vertebrate

      Humpty Dumpty, sitting, watching on a wall, before his great fall.

    • RoFaWh

      Sounds like one of dire critters in William Hope Hodgson’s “The Night Land”.

  • BearEyes

    OH, let’s grift some more for our failing mythology!
    I’m so tired of all this fairy tale nonsense masquerading as so-called “religion” all for the purpose of grift masquerading as tax free money grubbing.

    • B Snow

      I can’t believe donations to this sack of crap “organization” are tax deductible. WTF. I thought the point of tax-free charities was that they took some of the burden off the gov’t by taking care of the poor, sick, elderly, orphaned, etc. WHY does C-FAM get tax-free donations when they return NOTHING to society?

  • LovesIrony

    They’re fighting over the money of a dwindling murder of old crows

    • BearEyes

      plus points for the plural.

  • bryan

    Ruse, I asked the lord how much I should send you, and he told me you owe me $50.

  • sw42

    That reminds me, I do NOT see Homosexual Buccaneer shirts in the JMG store, Joe.

    • Cackalaquiano

      I would also buy shirts that included any of the fun phrases from Ruse’s first paragraph. “Abortion lover” “radical homosexual ” nefarious cause”

      • sw42

        Yeah! Also “sexual revolutionary.” Who DOESN’T want to be one of those?

    • Good Shot Green

      I’d say a Homosexual Buccaneer is the best Buccaneer, like homo sex is the best sex.

    • LonelyLiberal

      My Homosexual Buccaneers? They’re right under my Homosexual Buccan Hat.

      • Phillip in L.A.

        rimshot

  • johncAtl

    18 years of accomplishments … and I’ve never heard of C-FAM or Austin Ruse outside of JMG.

    • NedFlaherty

      The Vatican kept publicity about C-FAM to a minimum, because its main goal is to secretly write Roman Catholic religious superstition into the policies of the United Nations.

  • Austin who?

    This hatemonger claims to be head of a Catholic organization…a Christian sect whose top leaders have repeatedly said no to capital punishment. That the death penalty is morally wrong.

    But this Ruse asshole wants basically to murder everyone he doesn’t like, in defiance of his own Pope.

    Also, most children eventually outgrow imaginary friends and monsters.

    • NedFlaherty

      Amazingly, even the militant Roman Catholic clergy at the Vatican reject Austin Ruse. After AFA fired him, his profiteering “non-profit” was de-sanctified from religious to secular, and was re-named from “Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute” to the non-denominational “Center for Family & Human Rights.”

      When even the Vatican finds you too mean and distasteful for words, you’re burnt to a crisp.

  • Alan43

    Dang, was hoping he would say “homosexual buccaneers” again

  • TheManicMechanic

    Definitely a ruse. Deranged at that.

  • bambinoitaliano

    Are there that many RWNJ with money to give to all these whoring beggers?

  • LonelyLiberal

    Who? Also, a loser, as a quick poke into recent history will show you.

  • JCF

    Ruse shows up here to whine in 3…2…1…

  • The attacks have intensified? How will I respond?

    Why, I believe I’ll call out the Homosexual Buccaneers, that’s how! Look — here’s one now.

  • Oscarlating Wildely

    “Radical homosexuals.”

    I love that phrase. When exactly does one enter into the land of being a radical as opposed to a moderate homosexual? Does it depend on how many bars you visit or when you shop the new merch at Barney’s? Perhaps how often you get in for brunch at the Four Seasons? Or is it more about assless chaps? (Isn’t always about the assless chaps?)

    • Phillip in L.A.

      Agree. Please see my comment up- or downstream

    • RoFaWh

      It’s about expensive silicone toys from Square Peg Toys.

    • Blake Jordan

      Suicide glitter bombings, forcing people to abseil down tall buildings than getting them stoned on weed, …

    • ChrisMorley

      Little boy Austin’s money ruse really depends on there being no acceptable homosexuals. We’re all in thrall to the devil. Simply existing makes one a ‘radical’ homosexual compared with straights.
      Don’t be fooled into competing for ruse’s fake ‘radical’ badge. You are exactly fine as you are.

  • Jamie Brewer

    Dear Austin…. i’m sending a prayer to you, but I just committed to a monthly donation to moveon.org.

  • If all these “christians” who send all these assorted and various grifters money would combine their contributions, we could solve world hunger, cure all disease and build the Matt Damon spaceship for Mars.

    • Yup but instead they are convinced that they need to “save marriage” by preventing loving couples from getting married and also fight those evil sexual revolutionaries….ie anyone who admits that sex is there for more than just making babies.

    • GanymedeRenard

      Oh, but I don’t want to send Matt Damon to Mars! I rather send all these grifters and shysters to Jupiter (with a one-way ticket!).

      • How about that ice moon with a liquid ocean underneath the ice?

        • GanymedeRenard

          Yes!

  • Dreaming Vertebrate

    RUSE
    Relentlessly Ugly Sack of Excrement

  • Well one someone starts out with the assumption that homosexuality is a satanic tool to enslave people to sin and send them to hell I think it’s safe to say that their ability to engage in a rational policy debate has been compromised. This is why it is not surprising that the anti-gays don’t have any rational arguments…they don’t believe what they believe because it is sound policy but rather because they are driven by their religious beliefs.

  • Dreaming Vertebrate

    Ruse was preternaturally gifted with a face for radio.

  • 2patricius2

    I asked Satan for some money and he turned me down. He said I should ask Austin Ruse for some money.

  • agcons

    Doesn’t this cretin usually show up to piss and moan about our commentary? Come on, Austin, don’t be shy. I’ll give you a dollar if you do.

  • Snarkaholic

    How will I respond?
    1. Pointing
    2. Laughing

  • Claude Jacques Bonhomme

    The self-appointed “God’s Children’s” are not so well funded? All Americans pay for them through their tax exempt churches. What lies, what a fraud.

  • Claude Jacques Bonhomme

    Satin is well funded… yes Satin is so luxurious.

    http://shechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/guys-in-bed-2.jpg

    • ChrisMorley

      Other colours are available, of course.

  • NedFlaherty

    Even the militant Roman Catholic clergy at the Vatican find Austin Ruse intolerably oppressive.

    When he was fired by the certified haters at AFA, his profiteering “non-profit” was de-sanctified from religious to secular, and was re-named from “Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute” to the non-denominational “Center for Family & Human Rights.”

    • ChrisMorley

      Fantastic that he’s not even good enough to run a “Catholic” Institute and has had to go all secular.
      Nice bit of shade, Rome.

    • zhera

      Speaking of AFA, Bryan Fischer’s been quiet lately.

  • zhera

    Shouldn’t they beg the poop for money? Maybe God’s children aren’t well founded but God’s man on Earth sure is. Will they never connect the two?

  • lizdhm

    If Satan ever comes after you, hide behind a rich person.

  • TheSpinMonkey

    the goto play of the right wing loons – prey on the fear of the simple-minded and the uninformed. works like a charm.

  • chris james

    Foolish man, gays are not after your children…but then neither are you. Half a million kids in foster care shows a breakdown in the heterosexual world when it comes to parenting. Having kids is more than spreading your legs and not wearing a condom, Catholics should heed the warning signs. Every sperm is not sacred, just nutritious.

  • Bobby P

    This is all fine and dandy but the fact remains, there is no devil.

    • Johnny Wyeknot

      I beg your pardon!

  • millers3888

    Austin Ruse takes hateful to the next level. Sad, sad man.

  • kaydenpat

    Happy New Year to all you Abortion lovers, Radical homosexuals, and Sexual revolutionaries!! You’re the best.

  • Queequeg

    If anyone really believed in Satan, or God, they would know that neither lives on this planet, and certainly not in this country, so why would they need money?

  • James

    I just don’t get why an omnipotent god needs human intervention for anything.

  • Raising_Rlyeh

    “The Devil is well funded. God’s children, not so much.”

    Yeah, and which religion, supposedly founded by a disciple of jesus, has it’s own country and bank which is worth billions?

  • GanymedeRenard