#AllLionsMatter

  • Dazzer

    Give it three hours and he’ll be complaining about Christians being fed to gay lions…

  • TommyTune

    Which only goes to prove that you can try to stretch anything to connect to anything else, however unrelated, and still end up saying nothing at all.

    • ScottJL

      Amen!

    • Steverino

      I’m surprised it took him so long to come up with that. Must have emerged having deep thoughts while seated on the toilet.

      • jomicur

        I thought he wore adult diapers.

  • JT
    • Prixator

      And probably from Mecca, too!

  • GarySFBCN

    You know, I’m all for religious freedom, but that doesn’t mean that all thinking people should work to force these idiots to the margins of society, where they belong.

    As for non-crazy people of faith, the moment you force or try to induct anyone into your belief system is when you stop deserving a civil response. Because that act alone is so fucking arrogant that it should be considered to be rude.

    • Bj Lincoln

      Exactly. I don’t care what people believe as long as they keep it to themselves.

      • Prixator

        Or, at least wait to be sincerely asked to share their beliefs.

  • b

    Asshole

  • oikos

    FITB

  • Dan

    I fed this through Google Translate and got: “Hi. I’m an attention whore and if you don’t look at me I’ll have to make up more shit to be noticed.”

    • Reality.Bites

      I fed it through Google Translate and all I got was: Don’t feed me this crap again.

  • Bj Lincoln

    I don’t think I ever heard Christ referred to as ‘the Lion of Judah’ before. But then it is Bryan Fissure and he tends to make shit up to suit his needs.

    • MDB

      Revelation 5:5 (King James Version – KJV)
      And one of the elders saith unto me, Weep not: behold, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, hath prevailed to open the book, and to loose the seven seals thereof.

      • Bj Lincoln

        Thank you.

      • Porkie

        !?

        • MDB

          In Christian tradition, Jesus went out as the sacrificial Lamb, but will return as the triumphant Lion of Judah.

          • Craig Howell

            (mooted by comments below)

          • jomicur

            That would be the same Christian tradition that grooves on ritual cannibalism, right?

      • Sk3ptic

        Tell us more about David’s root.

    • popebuck1

      Bob Marley has a song about being “Iron, like a lion, in Zion.” Maybe Bryan is going Rasta on us.

      Which of course would make him “Bryan, like a lion, in Zion.”

    • BudClark

      It’s one of Jesus’ lesser-used titles. More recently, I think it was used to refer to the royal line of Ethiopia.

      • Bj Lincoln

        Interesting. Thanks.

      • Gene

        Correct, the Ethiopian Kings and Emperors claimed (while not on the throne now, they still claim) descent from King Soloman, King Davids son through the supposed descent of the child of Soloman and the Queen of Sheeba. This (very unlikely) claim to being related to the Isralie royal dynasty gave them a claim to ancient kingship even the European royals could not make, and, more importantly, made them cousins (VERRRRY distant cousins) to Jesus, who (like a LOT of people in Israel, a lot) was descended from the old royal family (long removed by war, waayyyy before even the Romans ruled the region). The Flag, until the communist coup in 74, had for over a century showed the Lion of Judah, and most Ethiopians still fly it today, although it is not the official flag. (and all Rastafarians, but, thats another story 🙂

  • Comixbear

    It’s only logical

  • MDB

    An unjust murder of an innocent teenage girl and a violent maniacal rampage of homophobic terror in Jerusalem gets no mention ?? Fischer would not hesitate to enable even more !!!
    The Lion of Judah weeps!!!

  • Porkie

    That’s nice Bryan,….. why don’t you make a picture all about it ….(that is; if they let you have fuzzy felts where you are at the moment)

  • Homo Erectus

    Proof?

  • popebuck1

    I thought Jesus was the Lamb of God, not the lion. Will you guys please pick ONE metaphor and stick with it?

    • vorpal

      Consistency has never been one of their strengths.

    • grada3784

      The guy read too much Narnia as a kid. In one of the books a lamb turns into Aslan.

      • Gustav2

        There is a reference in Revelations.

        • Ogre Magi

          To a donkey and an orangutan?????

      • popebuck1

        And the Antichrist is a donkey and an orangutan.

        • grada3784

          Puzzle repented. Shift didn’t.

    • Rod Steely

      Blame the month of March. Jesus came in like a lamb and went out like a lion

      • Prixator

        Ha! Well, Easter does occasionally fall in March.

        (I was always baffled as to why Easter dates ranged from late March to mid-April and then I learned why – Easter Sunday is the first Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox. And christians claim that their religion has no relationship to paganism!)

    • 2karmanot

      Indeed, because Agnus Dei was Jeebus’ Auntie!

  • CB

    I seriously doubt that Cecil’s cruel death is going to kick off 2000 years of fantasy that has been used to justify millions of even crueler deaths.

    • ScottJL

      It can if you feel like starting your own mythology!

  • StraightGrandmother

    One thing I like (if there is really anything to Like) in the Lion killing story is, it knocked the fake Planned Parenthood story off the front page.

    Ryan Anderson is going NUTZ trying to get us to focus our attention on Planned Parenthood when all we really want to focus on is the outrage of killing Cecil.

    They are really pissed off that the attention is not on their pet cause.

    • ScottJL

      Just goes to show you how not-interested the general public is in anything RA or his ilk have to say.

    • Gene

      Go to Al Mohlers “the briefing”. 1) you wont agree with anything he says…but he is the most articulate, and intelligent of our opponants, and his head is not burried in his ass. I go to his podcast every morning and usually find GLBT news there before its ANYWHERE else. he is not a supporter, but, not the rude vile AFA either. 2) see his various links to complaints from the religious right about just that…how offended they are that Cecil the lion got so much attention, but not everyone is up in arms about abortion films.

  • shellback

    Here’s the difference:
    Cecil = Real
    jeezis = Make-believe

    • Todd20036

      Another difference:

      Eating Cecil is bad.
      Eating Jesus is good.

  • A Big Sarcastic Fairy!

    Show him this.

  • M Jackson

    Bull(shit) in a china closet. Just how uninteresting can the thoughts of a 14 year old be?

  • Jimmy Joe

    Yeah, but Cecil actually existed.

  • Steven Leahy

    Christians – always having to make everything about them.

  • Mark

    Don’t you know he about pissed his pants getting that out? Dots is a really hard, hard game!

    Depends, Bri. Depends.

  • Phil

    Fischer must have brewed up and drank a bad bunch of moonshine again…… That’s the only plausible explanation I can think of.

  • j.martindale

    It’s all about me.

  • Marc

    I prefer the fable about the Lion of Mufasa

  • barrixines

    Bryan Fistula – continually lion for Jesus.

  • shellback

  • ab

    I thought Jesus was supposed to be the lamb not the lion. You know the perfect sacrifice, bathe in the blood of the Lamb, that kind of thing.

    • Reality.Bites

      Does this mean the bit about the lamb lying down with the lion is really about Jesus masturbating?

      I wonder how many kittens die when Jesus has a wank. And if they come back to life three days later.

      • ab

        Maybe Jesus was a furry.

        • Reality.Bites

          You probably can’t find a lot of furries in the middle east. The climate isn’t conducive. Especially 2000 years before air conditioning was invented.

          • ab

            But in Jesus all things are possible. Maybe he created a microclimate for his penis. Or maybe he’s into guys wearing a lion claw loincloth. I know that works for me.

  • Michael Rush

    Why is this post lion death salvation world full of idiots like Bryan Fischer ? What went wrong ?

  • PeterC

    So death, IS GOOD?????

  • sherman

    #EverythingIsAboutMe

  • Blake Jordan

    This bitch be crazy…

  • People4Humanity

    Oh, Bryan, please. When it takes you a full month —
    and two days! — to dream up a tweet, you just ain’t au courant.

  • Miji

    Bryan, stop trying to make “Lion of Judah” happen! It’s not going to happen! He’s already got like, a dozen nicknames, and no, it doesn’t make you seem relevant.

  • Rod Steely

    I don’t even know what that means.

  • goofy_joe

    Psst! Your irrelevance is showing!

  • Agiocambos

    Keyword: NOT HELPFUL

  • Marides48

    And all those unicorns that have been shot over the last 2000 years?

  • Cuberly
    • Yummy eye candy, thank ye kindly!

      • Cuberly

        Bow chic-a bow bow…lion eh?….lol…

        • Oh yeah, bow chic-a-bow-wow indeed!

  • tcinsf

    Wing nuts are incredibly contrarian. Silly me thought that just about everyone would agree that illegally poaching a magnificent lion from a national park was wrong; however these folks need to define it as a “liberal” story and then disagree with it. I’ve read some REMARKABLE posts from right wing “news sources” describing the “shocking truth” behind the story, and of course there’s no factual basis at all for their stories. Again, there’s just this need to be contrarian and to be an asshole, it gives them some bizarre sense of power.

  • KarenAtFOH

    Her name was Shira.

  • gaymex

    Bryan Fischer has the cognitive skills of a preschooler.

  • 2patricius2

    And lots of LGBT people have suffered unjust and cruel deaths over the ages. But they don’t matter to Bryan.

  • Rick

    Reductionist paradigm is so very reductionist.

  • Wasn’t “Lion of Judah” one of the titles claimed by the Emperor Haile Selassie?

    • RoFaWh

      Right you are. I’ve never heard it before in reference to Jeebus.

      Once again Fischer reveals his ignorance and carelessness.

      • Câl

        Rastafari use that phrase for Jesus as well as Haile Selassie who they see as the returned messiah. Could be Fischer running out of Christians to pay him and is trying to move to other religions. One can only hope that the ganja might mellow him out!

    • Jeebus was and still is called “The LAMB of God.”

  • MikeBx2

    Die an unjust death? I thought the only purpose of that “lion” being sent here was to die? He fulfilled his purpose so how is that unjust? I get the feeling they’re making this stuff up. :/

  • Even for him that is a fatuous remark.

  • Frommer_Gast

    And at the same time the armadillo from the race of David shot back to make his enemies retreat!

  • JaniceInToronto

    2015: Dirty Jew rabble rouser, terrorist and seditionist executed in Texas.

    There, that updates things for Bryan.

  • Sporkfighter

    Byran second guesses God a lot.

  • DaveMiller135

    I don’t hear as much, these days, about Christian kids being trained to respond to information about evolution by saying, “Were you there?” Do you think they figured out how that tactic could backfire on them?

  • Slippy_World

    Think that was all on the Third Stone Tablet ….

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I48hr8HhDv0

  • If your “Lion” didn’t die, Fischer, you’d all still be condemned to Hell by your “loving” invisible sky daddy. Your argument is invalid.

  • Rich Farias

    Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
    Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

    • Well said, bravo!

    • Gianni

      Gee, Rich, do you really want him to shut up?

  • 2karmanot

    I believe my Lion eyes!

  • Oh go fuck yourself with your jeebus dildo. You are a grifting hateful pile of nuclear waste, tainting everything you touch for millions of years.

  • billbear1961

    He certainly didn’t save your “soul,” you truly contemptible liar, you disgusting, disgraceful CALUMNIST.

    If Christ is the “Son of God,” few are in bigger trouble than you are, you fascist MONSTER.

  • JCF

    Sigh. [Y’know, as PATHETIC as is this trolling of Cecil’s abominable killing, this still probably ranks as the LEAST offensive thing Bry-Bry has ever said!]

  • fuzzybits
  • Gianni

    Ya gotta admit, that’s a pretty good segue into a religious theme. He’s more creative than I thought he could be.