AUSTRALIA: Beyonce Inspires Skyscraper

Vogue reports:

In case you didn’t have enough proof that Beyoncé is slowly taking over the world, Australia just approved plans to build a 68-story skyscraper in the shape of the singer’s famously curvaceous figure. While there have been plenty of oddly shaped structures that have gone up in the past—such as these constructions in the form of a robot, a lotus flower, and a basket—this is the first time a building has been inspired by a living pop star. The architecture firm Elenberg Fraser unveiled its plans for the undulating skyscraper yesterday and admits on its website that the shape of the Premier Tower was ultimately borrowed from Beyoncé’s “Ghost” video.

The tower will go up across from Melbourne’s famed Spencer Street train station.

  • Ian

    I do hope Beyonce get’s a pent house at least.

  • JT

    I hope they’ve done the wind tunnel tests.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFzu6CNtqec

  • Amanda B. Rekendwith

    “Does the 27th floor make my ass look fat?”

    • Rambie

      What’s the rent on the breast offices?

  • bkmn

    I wonder what Beyonce’s cut is.

    • Robincho

      I’m guessing it’d be a cut above…

  • Merv99

    Yeah, that’ll never leak.

    • BobSF_94117

      Just a bit when it sneezes.

      • JCF

        Depends for Skyscrapers!

  • TommyTune

    After a century of giant phallic symbols in the sky, I’m sure the ladies are happy finally to have a curvy symbol of their own.

    • lymis

      Honestly, how many people are going to look at that and think “Beyonce?”

      This is just another giant phallic symbol in the sky, whether Beyonce is involved or not.

      • Gustav2

        Hell, it is even “ribbed for her pleasure”

  • another_steve

    I think it’s ugly.

    Looks like my last spinal X-ray.

  • S1AMER

    Beyonce is beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. The building? Not so much.

  • Ireyon

    Hm. A building shaped like a curvaceous woman.

    I’m sure feminists will just love this one.

  • Adam King

    Beyoncé didn’t invent the female form; artists have noticed it before; that building doesn’t look like a woman in the slightest, much less like Beyoncé. Stupid piled on stupid.

    • lymis

      It looks more like the T-1000 Terminator in Terminator 2 Or that water critter from The Abyss.

  • GarySFBCN

    While I’m not sure of the laws in Australia, I’m guessing that unless it is satire or social commentary, they will be sued by Beyoncé, and she will win.

    • Nic Peterson

      That sounds like something Bey would go after.

  • Rocketeer500

    The building is too thin, and doesn’t do justice to her large bubble-butt. The building looks more like Twiggy, not Beyonce’.

  • JT

    Hey, Joe, there’s another nutter at work–this one on the Louisiana Supreme Court.

    Louisiana Justice Refuses To Obey Supreme Court, Writes Opinion Implying Gay People Rape Their Children

    The most unusual opinion of the lot came from Justice Jefferson D. Hughes, III, who dissented from the court’s conclusion that it actually must comply with binding constitutional precedents handed down by the
    United States Supreme Court. “Judges instruct jurors every week not to surrender their honest convictions merely to reach agreement,” Hughes began. “I cannot do so now.”

    Hughes’s opinion is only two paragraphs. It cites no authorities and provides no legal arguments in support of his position. It does, however, include an apparent suggestion that gay parents are pedophiles. “This case involves an adoption,” he writes, adding that “[t]he most troubling prospect of same sex marriage is the adoption by same sex partners of a young child of the same sex.”


    http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2015/07/08/3677978/louisiana-justice-refuses-obey-supreme-court-opinion-implying-gay-people-rape-children/

    • John30013

      “Follow the law” ≠ “Surrender honest convictions”. Keep your damn convictions, but an officer of the court is oath-bound to follow the law as adjudicated by the Supreme Court.

  • Is it just me????

    It looks like a giant dildo.

  • Isaac

    When will they build a skyscraper in the shape of Ben Cohen? Now, THAT will be something!

    • RoFaWh

      Let’s just cut to the chase and demand that the next egregious architectural failure be shaped like a penis (very life-like, too), with a fountain on the top that periodically blasts out “fluid”. While the building shakes.

  • danolgb

    Yo Melbourne, I’m really happy for you, Imma let you finish but New York had one of the best towers of all time…one of the best towers of all time!

  • What?

    I’m not sure about looking like Beyonce. Skyscrapers with undulating facades have been trendy for the past few years (eg Aqua Tower in Chicago).

    It will certainly generate publicity for the design firm.

  • Cuberly

    After seeing so many blase’ residential towers going up in SF I enjoy seeing something a little more visually challenging. Heck I even like the newly proposed pyramid in Paris.

    http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/660/media/images/79074000/jpg/_79074422_024764544-1.jpg

    • Adam King

      That’s not a pyramid. It’s a slice of pizza.

  • noni

    Doesn’t Australia have their own celebrities they could celebrate?

    I recently watched an Australian television series that ended about 10 years ago, but had run for 12 years called “All Saints” (on hulu). I’ve noticed that they seem to only reference US celebrities when mentioning celebrities.

    • Chuck in PA

      They should have used Sheila Florance or Dame Edna Everage as inspiration.

    • lymis

      Maybe Australian celebrities don’t pose for photoshoots wearing body bags?

  • It looks designed and built by Taelons.

    • John30013

      +1,000 for the Earth: Final Conflict reference. That series had such potential. Too bad they couldn’t keep the actors around for more than a season or two.

      • I blame the producers. They wanted instant Star Trek fanbase and resorted to action, blonde, tits, action, guns, pow-pow-pow, tits! to get viewers. That first season was like magic to me.

  • Unless that’s a body double.

    Has anyone seen the video and can confirm that footage shows her before she covers her face? LOL.

  • geoffalnutt

    I won’t be impressed ’til I see it twerk. Otherwise, it’s just a curvy building.

  • TheManicMechanic

    All the hip people will live on the middle floors.

  • RoFaWh

    It’s a complete architectural failure for the simple reason that it doesn’t fit in, not in any way. It’s just another architect on a lookatmelookatme jag.

    • JT

      They could build one next to it shaped like Jay Z.

      • J̶a̶l̶a̶p̶e̶ñJoe Smithson

        They have enough square ugly buildings now.

        • Actually, Spencer Street Station is notable for its prominent curvy roof (completed in 2006) so the Beyonce tower should fit in quite nicely.

          My original snarky post confused it with Flinders Street Station, built in 1910 and perhaps the most overbearingly hideous public building in the country. (You can tell I’m not a Melbournian!)

          • Jonathan from Australia

            Yeah and because its been ‘Southern Cross Station’ since it was rebuilt in 2006 😉

          • It was officially Southern Cross Station last time I went to and from Melbourne by train. That was back in 1989.

          • Jonathan from Australia

            I’m afraid you are misremembering. It was renamed when it was rebuild.

  • J̶a̶l̶a̶p̶e̶ñJoe Smithson

    Good luck getting square office furniture to fit in a way that makes the most economical use of uber expensive floor rental.

    • lymis

      It’s simple. Just put everything you own in a box to the left.

      • Kenneth Hwang

        And the stuffs other people bought, please don’t touch.

  • MBear

    Interestingly similar to the “Marilyn Monroe” condos in Mississauga, ON, Canada

  • seanpaulmahoney

    I still can’t remember– what did Beyonce ever do for gay people? Anyone?

    • lymis

      Inspired a couple of Kurt Hummel’s dance numbers on Glee?

  • I’m waiting for a stadium in the shape of The Donald’s hair.

    • lymis

      They did:

      China’s bird’s nest stadium
      [https://www.google.com/search?q=bird’s+nest+stadium&safe=off&client=safari&rls=en&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=Vp6dVfziK9bsoASF1LO4Bg&ved=0CB4QsAQ&biw=1920&bih=901#safe=off&tbm=isch&q=bird%27s+nest+stadium+today]

  • Octavio

    I like it.

  • e jerry powell

    Thus assuring that we will never get away from Beyonce.
    You figure, though, that after a while, even she’s going to get tired of all of it.

  • anne marie in philly

    ew. ugly. both of them (the human and the building).

  • Joseph Miceli

    Looks like someplace Cthulhu would live.

  • kaydenpat

    There are two apartment buildings inspired by Marilyn Monroe’s figure in Mississauga, Ontario so perhaps this is a trend.

  • JCF

    “Keep the curves, lose her head”: the usual straight male fantasy. Ick.

  • Ugh. Giving too much credit to Beyonce.

  • http://architectureau.com/articles/news-of-melbournes-beyonce-tower-goes-global/?utm_source=ArchitectureAU&utm_campaign=a7803e1d2f-AAU_2015_07_10&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_e3604e2a4a-a7803e1d2f-40520885&mc_cid=a7803e1d2f&mc_eid=ac1e06df59

    Not sure whether the on-line magazine (ArchitectureAU) is published with the imprimatur of the (Royal) Australian Institute of Architects — though it comes to me as a retired member — but the print version (Architecture Australia) is.