Tyler Clementi’s Mother: I’ve Changed

The mother of Tyler Clementi, the gay Rutgers student who leaped to his death from the George Washington Bridge, says she’s riddled with self-blame but has come to a new understanding about her son’s sexuality.

“I think some people think that sexual orientation can be changed or prayed over,” she said now, in her kitchen. “But I know sexual orientation is not up for negotiation. I don’t think my children need to be changed. I think that what needed changing is attitudes, or myself, or maybe some other people I know.” She decided she could no longer attend her church, because doing so would suggest she supported its teachings against homosexuality.

And she took strength from reading the Bible as she reconsidered her views. “At this point I think Jesus is more about reconciliation and love,” she said. “He spoke more about divorce than homosexuality, but you can be divorced and join a church more than you can be gay and join churches.” What has troubled her most is the thought that Tyler believed she had rejected him.

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