Today In Wingnuttery

A California school district has pulled all the dictionaries from its libraries after a parent complained that a student was able to look up the definition of “oral sex.”

School officials will review the dictionary to decide if it should be permanently banned because of the “sexually graphic” entry, said district spokeswoman Betti Cadmus. The dictionaries were initially purchased a few years ago for fourth- and fifth-grade classrooms districtwide, according to a memo to the superintendent. “It’s just not age appropriate,” said Cadmus, adding that this is the first time a book has been removed from classrooms throughout the district. “It’s hard to sit and read the dictionary, but we’ll be looking to find other things of a graphic nature,” Cadmus said. She explained that other dictionary entries defining human anatomy would probably not be cause for alarm.

We should applaud this wise school district. Why, those kids are just one definition away from strapping on dildos and going crazy!

CORRECTION: When I looked up Menifee, the first result was a town in Arkansas. The Menifee school district in this story is in southern California. My apologies.