Slow Your Roll

Purple Drank, every gangsta rapper’s favorite cough syrup-laden grape drink, is now on sale in NYC. Only without the actual cough syrup.

Get ready to “slow your roll” New York; the mass-produced version of “Purple Drank” will hit shelves in Manhattan and the Bronx this week. According to Wikipedia, the homemade version of the beverage is “a recreational drug popular in the hip-hop community of the southern United States. Its main ingredient is prescription-strength cough syrup containing codeine and promethazine. Purple Drank was supposedly popularized by Houston’s DJ Screw, who then died in 2000 from a codeine overdose, thus assuring the drink’s eternal fame. More recent celebrity cachet comes courtesy Britney Spears.

The commercial version contains melatonin, valerian root and rose hips. The makers call it the “Anti-Energy Drink.” Perfect for the office.